✩ Abby is SO touchy, like, she always needs to have atleast one part of her body touching you. If you're watching tv she'd pull your legs onto her lap, or give you soft scratches along your arms. She'd so literally anything as long as she's touching you.
✩Abby is really really bad at keeping herself awake when she's tired, once she's to the point of yawning it's game over for her. And she falls asleep in the strangest most uncomfortable looking positions. Sleeping while she's sat up fully straight, things like that. She's just a tired girl.
✩Abby loves to cook, you name it, she'll make it for you. While she's cooking she'd constantly call you down to taste everything, making sure everything's perfect for you.
✩Abby loves to kiss you, especially on your neck. No matter what you're doing you can guarantee she'll sneak up behind you, planting small tender kisses along your neck.
I hope this was alright, please feel free to leave any suggestions in the comments or in my asks, I'll do my best to answer them all xx
summary: you're an idiot who lost the love of your life. somehow, you get her back.
contains: sydney lohmann x bayfcplayer.ᐟreader, exes to lovers, mentions of relationship insecurities, sorta messy timeline, mentions of concussion/injury, jealousy, jealous.ᐟreader, sydney got the patience of a saint, they're inlove your honor, some angst with fluff
word count: 6.0k
author note: first fic on this blog, hopefully you cool ppl in my phone like it. lil warning for the fic going from past tense to present tense alot, that's the point. i tried a slightly different writing style doing this so let's hope it eats. enough yapping, enjoy ❤️ p.s. this is a lyrics fic.
PLAYING THINGS I WISH YOU SAID BY SABRINA CARPENTER
baby, sorry, i left you in the dark. i always reach for your leg over there on your side of the car
you are really fucking stupid. at least, that's what you have been telling yourself for the past two months.
you're in your car, on your way to deyna's party. of course, san jose traffic is packed and going at snail speed, leaving you with time to think many thoughts. way too many thoughts.
thoughts that are mainly involving a pretty, german blonde who used to be yours at one point. she would still be yours right now if you didn't end things impulsively.
what did your parents say when you were a teenager about how social media is poison? you are slowly starting to agree because you let opinions circulating around social media and your insecurities end a good thing. now the one person you didn't want to hurt in this life is hurt and you're hurting alongside her.
you almost want to forget about her, but who could forget about sydney?
that's why when you change lanes to reach your exit on the highway, your hand automatically goes to the passenger seat to reach for a thigh that isn't there.
right. she's in germany, not here.
you're so fucking stupid.
baby, everything reminds me of you. nobody gets my jokes, everyone here thinks i'm fucking rude
being at practice reminds you so much of sydney. it makes sense, you both are professional players. so of course your day is riddled with memories of sydney.
arriving at the training facility reminds you of that time sydney told you she tripped coming into bayern's training building, and she was teased for days.
going through drills has you thinking about when sydney whined on the phone everyday about her legs and feet hurting after practice.
time in the gym, doing your cardio is not that different from the days where sydney and you would workout out together. getting a sweet treat right afterward.
so, by the time training is over, you are ready to get dressed quickly in the locker room and duck out to go drown in your self-pity and regret at home. it's too bad that even the locker room reminds you of sydney or the lack thereof.
“why are you changing so fast? trying to run away from those bad shots you made?” jen jokes, coming to sit by you at your cubby.
you look at her, your hands still occupied tying your shoe. “you cannot be talking after the amount of times you fell. your age catching up to you?” you say in a similar joking tone with a side of deadpan,
or so you thought as everyone looks at you like you're crazy.
“i was just playing around, chill,” jen says. her words confuse you and so does the reactions of your other teammates.
did your joke have venom that you were unaware of behind it? or did you say it more on the side of deadpan than joking?
all you know is that sydney would have laughed at that. she would be giggling so hard, her face would get all red. then she would have thrown an even better insult right back at you.
you really miss her.
when i saw you cry, i didn't handle it well. without you here, i don’t know what to do with myself.
your nights have been so boring ever since you broke up with sydney. the same routine: get home, shower, water the plants, eat dinner, and then spend an hour or two scrolling on social media trying to fight the urge to stalk sydney's page.
you had blocked the blonde back when you two first broke up. you remember how klara texted you about how that's “childish and just hurts you both more.” she's right, of course, but who's going to tell her that? not you. not after you made a whole big deal about moving on and focusing on your career.
moving on doesn't even seem right. that's for people who were heartbroken by chance, not on purpose. it's not for people who hurt themselves by ending something that was good and stable because they couldn't get out of their own head.
still, as you lay there and scroll, your entire being craves for what used to belong to it.
you desire sydney's warmth.
you miss sydney's scent.
you are hungry for sydney's kisses.
you need to be held down by the weight of her body on top of yours.
instead, you are being weighed down by the pain you inflicted upon her. haunted by the sight of tears filling up in her eyes the day you ended everything and walked away. the unanswered text messages she left you the following night after she got drunk. the single text that followed the morning after that,
those were mistakes. ignore them.
everything blares in your head like an alarm that never stops. a clock that is broken, but not because it doesn't sound off but because it continues to sound off even if you want it to stop. there is no snooze for your regret, not with the way your dreams are filled to the brim with thoughts of sydney, too.
i think about these things at night before i fall asleep. things i wish you said to me.
syd's barely affectionate with her.
they don't give off girlfriends vibes.
sydney is more cuddly with her friends than her own girlfriend.
wonder when they are going to break up.
it's not going to last.
you reread the comments that led to your self inflicted suffering in the first place. the noodles in front of you on the table have run cold and your appetite is halfway gone at this point anyways.
social media has never been a big part of how you move throughout the world. you love to doomscroll, and of course, you have your favorite creators across platforms. you know about different trends and internet slang. duh, you aren't thirty. but you never used to let social media dictate how you interact with people outside of it. social media is full of algorithms and echo-chambers made to take over people's thoughts. forcing them to stay on apps longer than needed to look for solutions for problems that have been caused by said apps.
that's always how you felt.
but even you fell into the trap of social media. early in your relationship with sydney, you were too in the honeymoon phase to think about looking at socials. too wrapped up in sydney. however, when you two calmed down into a just as in love but more controlled state, your mind started wandering.
wondering what people are saying about you two. do they find you two cute? couple goals? were there fanpages for your relationship?
other players who are in relationships often have these things, so why wouldn't you guys have those as well?
what you didn't expect to find was people overanalyzing the way sydney and you interacted in public. for people to wonder if you guys are even in love.
“they don't see me when i'm with you. they don't know how attached i am to you every second we are alone,” sydney said when you brought up your growing insecurity. she was smiling all sweet, sitting on top of you.
how could you not believe her with the way she's kissing the frown off your lips?
your insecurities still grew and grew and grew until they became a hill. a hill, you weren't able to climb over.
they don't know how sydney loves wearing your clothes around and outside of the house because she's obsessed with your smell. they don't know about all the nights she cuddled into your side, basically glued to your skin. they aren't there on the days you were in sydney's apartment, cooking and dancing with her. they don't see the way she is all over you when you two are alone.
yeah, she wasn't super affectionate in public but that's only because she got so shy every time you showed her any love.
fans online didn't know about any of that, but you wish they did. you wish you didn't put so much value into their opinions because you probably would still have sydney in your grasp right now if you didn't.
if only you came to sydney about this more. the german player would rush to do anything that would make you feel better, more secure. but no, you just couldn't because you were afraid she would be annoyed you kept bringing the topic up after she reassured you the first time.
sydney would have never done that and you knew that.
that wrongful thought was influenced by that stupid hill in your head that was built on tons and tons of mean comments. the weariness of long distance fueled the comments impact on your mind deeply. getting reassured over the phone wouldn't be as satisfying as in person, so you never brought up the topic again and everytime you were with sydney, you didn't want to ruin the moment so again you didn't say a word. all of this created a hamster wheel you couldn't get out of.
you get up from the table, throwing your noodles away. they are too cool to eat now, and reheated noodles do not sound appetizing.
slipping into bed, your mind thinks back to the past over and over again until it tires itself out enough that you drift off to sleep.
things like “darling, i hope you know it scared me to death. the night that your sister said you got into an accident.”
number that SHOULD be blocked
i'm so sorry about your injury
when i saw you go down, my heart fell to my ass
i hope you have good ppl around you to take care of you ❤️
contact changed to sydney
you
i do
thanks for texting
sydney
….
yk i'm here for you too, right?
ik we broke up and aren't supposed to talk but
i'm just rlly worried about you
your heart feels like it's beating at 100 miles per hour. first, sydney texts you then second, she's worried about your injury and third, she wants to fucking be there for you.
is this a dream? have your wishes to get her back finally come true?
you look at the text, pondering what to send back. an immediate yes would be too desperate, right? but you are desperate for her you think to yourself.
fuck it, just say yes.
right when you are about to text back, sydney beats you to it.
sydney
there's no pressure
i know we haven't talked in forever
how is she being so considerate when you're the one who broke her heart?
you
i want you
sydney
??
you
i mean i want you to be there for me
can we talk pls?
be friends or whatever you want
sydney
duh
i'm the one who offered
there go the other side of sydney that you know and love.
“and god, i, i'm watching everything that you do. i can't get your songs out of my head or your hair out of my room.”
sydney and you have been texting back and forth everyday since that day she texted you. anyone looking from outside the situation would said it's heading straight for disaster. exes texting regularly again? especially when one is still very much inlove with the other? a speeding train just waiting to crash.
to that, you would say they don't understand. there isn't no tension or lingering resentment or anger between sydney and you while yall talk. that truth surprises you considering the fact you basically dumped sydney four months ago. if the roles were reversed, you wouldn't want to see her ever again, but somehow sydney's heart is overflowing with so much love that she doesn't have room to hate you.
she checks up on your well-being pertaining to your head injury. the recovery so far has been slow, very slow. you aren't even in rehab yet, still stuck at home resting and sleeping throughout the day. thankfully, your parents flew to san jose to come take care of you.
when you aren't sleeping, then you are texting sydney. her check-ups on you have slowly turned into long conversations about her day. texting her almost makes you feel like you two never broke up, that you two are still dating.
when you can't talk to her or are unable to sleep, you keep up to date with bayern munich. if someone asked why you were watching them, you would say not only for sydney, but that would be a lie. just a little white lie, though. you're watching for klara, lea, and lena too.. but mostly for sydney.
seeing her in her element, all sweaty and passionate, makes your head feel a little less broken, so yes, you will continue to watch her matches without telling her.
and what you don't know is that sydney thinks of you every time her feet touch the pitch. how she goes even harder than normal to impress you just in case you are watching. she hopes you are watching her, she always has and always will. even right after you broke up with her and she had to push her feelings down to go put on a good performance for germany, she played so hard she was MVP of both friendlies. back then, sydney hoped you viewed her performances with envy. with deep regret for letting go of a woman like her. now she hopes you look at her in admiration when she plays well.
you also don't know that sydney never threw away any of the gifts you gave her during your relationship. she was supposed to throw everything away in a box like lea recommended, but she couldn't. she couldn't throw away all of the memories she had left of you in her home. she couldn't delete the pictures she had of you in her phone. she couldn't even block your number.
sydney hanged onto every single last string she had that was still connected to you. it's hard to let go after being dumped. she thought, no, she knew you were the love of life. her entire world came crashing down when you sat her down on the last day of you visiting her in germany, suddenly saying you believe you two should be over. that long distance isn't working out for you anymore.
she cried for a week after you left. klara had to come over and help her clean up her apartment after a week of just crying in bed.
after that, the blonde slowly tried to move on. she went out more, with and without her friends. posted more on instagram. pushed herself into drowning in work related to football. even all of that didn't help her forget about you. she couldn't. her soul still yearned for yours.
she watched your matches in secret, all of her attention focused on you. her heart rate would perk up whenever commentators said your name. she wasn't able to pull her attention away from her tv when the camera would do a close-up of you.
so obviously, the day you got injured, sydney knew. she saw the way you went down and didn't get back up. her blood was rushing to her head, her chest was hurting as she watched you get carried off. it nearly felt like she was the one injured with how her body was feeling.
could sydney be faulted for texting you? for worrying about you? klara would slap the phone out of her hand if she knew about this, but good thing klara wasn't in her apartment. going off straight adrenaline and concern, sydney sent that text that led to you being back in her life.
texting back and forth everyday has sydney dopamine hooked. you still have the same effect on her that you always have.
every time she texts you, her eyes glance around her room at the various things you left behind when you broke up with her.
the sweater you never asked for back.
the dragon stuffed animal she won for you at a carnival.
the brush you always used when you came over. she couldn't bring herself to use it after you left her, so it just sat on her vanity, taunting her for ages.
sydney told herself that when she texted you about your injury, you two would keep a certain level of distance. that you wouldn't become lovers again. that she was only checking up on you every day because you deserved people in your corner.
that last part is true, but her other motive is also there: she wants you back.
i saw you meet somebody, and i'm jealous as hell. that i can't even stomach loving someone else.
the texting between sydney and you have gone from texting to calling. a big leap, but you both admitted to liking calling more than anything else.
the calling is totally not an indication of falling back into a similar routine from before the break-up.
or maybe it is because you don't fall asleep on the phone with your friends, you don't text your friends good morning and good night, you don't send so many selfies of yourself to your friends. those are actions you always have done with sydney.
anyone could see that you two still like each other, obviously, but you are seemingly blind to it.
perhaps it's the regret, pity, and guilt for ruining a good thing for no reason that's keeping you ignorant of what's growing between you two once more.
that ignorance wouldn't last forever.
sydney and you have now been in contact again for five months, more than no-contact lasted. your recovery is coming along better than your doctors expected. your head doesn't feel heavy anymore and you can have the tv above sixty without your head feeling like it's going to explode. sydney was more happy about this progress than you were.
syd 🥺
just watch
in a few months you're going to be able to run and play again
you
my doctors said that's not happening so soon
syd 🥺
idcc
you're like half magical so you will recover soon
you
LMAOOO
half magical is insane
you're crazy
syd 🥺
crazy or optimistic?
you
both…
syd 🥺
WOW??
okay i see how it is
say this to my face
incoming call from syd 🥺
after you answer the call, sydney and you talk for three hours. bickering back and forth with a mix of talking about your days. of course, your day is the same as always. you slept, ate, crocheted a bit with your mother, and saw your doctor. meanwhile, sydney's was full of life per usual. she went grocery shopping, helped lea clean out her spare room, got some sweets from a bakery, and “saw the cutest dog while walking home” in her own words. hearing about her lively days makes you feel a bit better about your own days that are very simple and very boring nine times out of ten. there isn't much a person recovering from a concussion can do.
you could push away and ignore your feelings when you two were in just a bubble of you and sydney. nobody else is in the way, questioning if exes talking everyday was healthy. nobody wondering if all that contact would lead to something more.
that bubble is broken the day you see something that makes you feel sick.
it's a saturday, you're scrolling on instagram. sydney is busy at a gathering with some friends, leaving you to your own devices.
sorta already missing her, you go on her instagram to look at her posts. you had unblocked the moment you two started talking again. as you click on her story, you wish you still had her blocked.
your head feels like it's going to explode as you look at the photo: sydney is sitting on a couch, and some girl is on her lap, smiling way too hard.
what the hell was going on?
you almost type out a message to sydney before you get control of your emotions. it isn't your place to be jealous or hurt or annoyed. sydney and you aren't together anymore. you two are friends, only friends right now.
you feel sick as you swipe out of instagram. it's time for a nap before your head falls off of your body with the way it pounds.
seeing sydney with someone else is making you stop believing the lie that you two were platonic right now. you could never be friends with the woman you love.
i think about these things at night before i fall asleep. things i wish you said to me.
that instagram story sets off a series of events.
first, you slowly took a step back from talking to sydney. the step back was so slow that she didn't notice at first. honestly, you took two more months to not talk to her everyday because you were hooked on her messages. hooked on her jokes and selfies and laugh and cute rambles. still, you somehow did it. instead of talking everyday, you two talked three days a week and only for an hour. way less than you two used to do.
second, you started putting tons of work into your recovery. seeing a physical therapist and slowly incorporating small, easy exercises into your day helps you come closer to getting back on the pitch. the first day you step back onto the bay fc training facility grounds, your emotions are everywhere. you haven't seen your teammates as much as you use to when you were not injured and seeing them training while you were just visiting the physical therapist killed you. they were all happy to see you though, catching you up on everything that has been happening since you were away. your head injury has calmed down enough that you could sit outside and watch everyone else practice. all the shouting and sounds of bodies moving doesn't irritate your head thankfully. you follow this similar routine for a long while, even if you are slightly sad about not being able to play.
and finally, sydney confronts you about pushing her out of your life.
you're lying on your bed, having just came back from a day at the bay fc training facility. you and sydney haven't talked for a week straight, her apparently busy with her life over in germany and you making an active choice to talk to her less.
that's why when a notification from her comes up on your screen, you look away from your screen then back at it to see if this is happening right now. it's not the notification itself that makes you act like that, but the message,
sydney (wait 30 mins before answering)
why are you treating me like this again?
you
sydney
what are you talking about?
sydney (wait 30 mins before answering)
you're ignoring me
we barely talk anymore
what's gotten into you?
you try to think up an excuse. eventually landing on,
you
yk i'm busy with rehab and stuff
sydney (wait 30 mins before answering)
bullshit
stop lying to me
you
calm down syd
omg
sydney (wait 30 mins before answering)
don't tell me to calm down wtf
first you randomly break up with me for some stupid reason
“long distance isn't working” whatever that supposed to mean
i just know in my gut that's not why you left me
now we became close again and you're leaving me again?
why let me back in your life if you're going to do this to me
your head is starting to pound as blood rushes to your face. you always hated when sydney was angry with you and this time is no different. it's justified though. what you're doing is really cruel, pushing sydney away after becoming close with her again. you have hurt her once again.
you're so stupid.
in the process of trying to run from your feelings, trying to ignore the jealousy seeping from your psyche after seeing the photo of that random girl on her lap in that photo. lost in your thoughts, you don't realize that it's been ten minutes since you replied to her.
sydney (wait 30 mins before answering)
okay
do what you want
march 14th, 11:11pm, read
ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh
“i don't know how to say this.. but you deserve an explanation. you wouldn't answer my calls or texts, and i get it. i left you not once but twice. both times for stupid reasons that i should have communicated instead of going ghost. the day i broke up with you.. i cried the moment i got home. all i could think about for so long is how hurt you looked. that should have made me act, but it didn't, and i just regret everything. the first time i pushed you away, it's because i let the internet get to me. make me feel all insecure about us. i pushed you away a second time because i realized i couldn't stay platonic with you. i.. saw that insta story of yours. the one with that girl on your lap. i lost my mind because i thought i didn't have a chance with you ever again. i'm really sorry, so sorry. i miss you so much. call me back, please?”
voicemail left to sydney, april 23rd, 3:00am
sorry, i pulled the “it's not you. it's me.” one day, i'll make sure you get a real apology.
sydney
are you busy?
she texts you one day in july. you thought that she was fully done with you after not speaking for nearly two months, but thankfully she isn't. you can make this right.
you
no
incoming call from sydney
…
“hello?”
you haven't heard her voice in so long. it sounds just the same, all soft and pretty. a rush of fondness hits you.
“hi sydney,” you say, more like whisper, into the phone.
there's some shuffling on the other line before she speaks again. was she moving around on her bed? it's a nervous habit of hers to move during intense situations you think to yourself.
you push your thoughts to the side as sydney speaks, “.. i got your voicemail.”
you thought she deleted it with how long it has been since you had sent it.
“did you like it?” you say.
why the fuck did you say that?
instead of hanging up the phone in your face, sydney laughs. you have missed her laugh so much.
“i wouldn't be calling if i didn't.”
“oh right.. sorry.” you let out a laugh of your own at your stupidity. not just your stupidity from right now but all the times before, too.
then the moment you start laughing, that makes sydney start laughing again. creating a cycle of you laughing at her laughter, then her laughing at yours and again. laughing on the phone with your ex after not speaking for some months once again is actually insane, but it seems like that's just how sydney and you are: insane.
the two of you calm down soon enough. getting back to the serious conversation that needs to be had.
“you know it really hurt me when you stopped talking to me. i thought we were getting somewhere.. platonic or not. it hurts even more to know you still like me but pushed me away anyways. don't you want me?”
“of course i want you.”
“then why didn't you say anything?”
“....”
“that was a stupid question.. i listened to your voicemail. i know why.. i just want to hear it from your own mouth in real time.”
you sigh before going silent for a moment. sydney doesn't speak, she just waits.
“i just.. was so insecure the longer we were together. i know at the time you told me to ignore social media, but i couldn't. all of those people were saying we shouldn't be together and that you didn't want me. i couldn't take it. i felt like i was holding you back from someone better, so i left. then when we started talking again, i deluded myself into believing we were on our way to being just platonic but i can never be just friends with you. the night i saw that photo on your insta story, i didn't know what to do.. so i left again. i'm sorry.”
“.. i accept your apology, but i'm still hurt. i thought you trusted me enough to talk to me about anything?”
“i do.. i did.. i swear.”
“you don't act like it.”
“i'll be better if you let me. if you want me.”
“i want you, but you'll have to work for it. i'm not taking you back that easily.”
i waste my time, i waste my life on idiotic things. like things you never said. things you'll never say to me.
sydney and you start talking again after that call. things between you two move slow though, very slow. more slow than the first time you guys got together.
you know that sydney is waiting things out, trying to see if you would leave her again. she keeps a certain distance when you two speak a little too flirty. she shuts it down quickly every time, which hurts, but you get it. you have to earn that side of her again.
and you do just that.
it's in small ways than some grand gesture. you tell about everytime you watch one of her matches, mostly praising her but throwing in some critique as well. after your rehab sessions, you tell her about everything. all your feelings surrounding the sessions, how much you've been improving. everytime you feel jealousy at one of sydney's posts, you talk to her about it.
that distance between you two slowly closes. not only emotionally but physically.
the summer the year after sydney and you reconnected for the second time since the break-up, you find the time to fly to germany for her birthday.
you asked before coming, though, not wanting to mess up the new connection you two are building.
“syd, i got a question,” you say, phone propped up on the bathroom sink as you got ready for another day at training. you have progressed very far in your recovery, thankfully, and can now do some light training with the team.
“hmmmmm?” sydney murmurs. she's looking all cute on the other line, face pressed to her pillow as she lays in bed. her room is dark, with the only light coming from her phone screen.
there's some hesitation that crosses your mind, but you push it away. communication, remember?
“can i come see you?” you ask.
sydney sits up slightly after hearing your question. there's clear confusion on her face.
“what do you mean?”
“i want to fly to germany for your birthday.”
sydney goes silent for a long moment. your nerves peak, looking at your screen. was this too big of a step for her? does she need more time to be ready to see you in person?
her answer surprises you.
“okay,” she says.
you booked your flight to germany that night and next thing you know, you're there. unfortunately, sydney isn't the one who picks you up from the airport. lena takes over that job, but it's still fun to hangout with lena after so long.
you don't see sydney until the day of her birthday. she claims she's been busy and you believe her. she texts you all the time even if she doesn't come see you physically.
your mind runs wild as you get ready for sydney's birthday party. you're in lena’s bathroom, making sure your hair looks perfect and your makeup doesn't make you look clown-ish and that your fit actually fits you and maybe you should brush your teeth again-
“you know sydney doesn't hate you, right?” lena interrupts your anxious thoughts.
“duh i know. i wouldn't be here if she did,” you say, still staring intensely at your appearance through the mirror.
lena rolls her eyes. “then why are you getting ready like we're going to a pageant? sydney likes you in every way. she was really hurt when you guys broke up, but obviously, she's moved on from it if she invited you to come all the way here.”
lena's words make you slow down your overanalyzing of yourself. she's right, sydney is forgiving you right now. trying to overdo everything to seem perfect isn't going to make her like you any more. she already likes you alot.
she wants you, not some polished version.
“you're right. i'm finished, let's go,” you say, leaving the sink and coming by the doorframe to make lena turn around. the two of you leave the bathroom, then put on your shoes and finally leave her apartment.
the drive to sydney's party is a short one, or at least it feels that way. lena, and you sing along to the songs on the radio the entire way there.
once at sydney's place, your heart starts racing. being back in her space feels so strange, but so right. alot is the same, but alot is different aswell. she bought a new couch, an upgrade from her old leather one. there's more plants around the place. her tv is new and even bigger than her last one.
the apartment is basically full with all of the bayern munich team and some other people from sydney's life. the smell of pizza and chicken hits your nose as you walk from the living room, where you greet everyone, to the kitchen.
and there is sydney.
her back is turned as you walk into the kitchen, but you can tell it's her.
her hair is styled in a ponytail, and she's wearing this black tank top and nice fitting jeans. she looks so pretty. she looks even prettier when she turns around.
“y/n?” sydney looks at you like she wasn't expecting you. perhaps she wasn't fully prepared to see you in person? even though she knew you were coming to her party. she allowed you to, after all.
you smile at her, “hi syd. is it too soon to say i missed you?”
“is it too soon to hug you?” she smiles at you back.
“i would be stupid to say yes, and i'm done being stupid.”
sydney flies into your arms, embracing you tightly. her arms wrap around your neck, her cheek pressing against yours. her quick reaction would feel weird if it didn't feel so right. you hug her back just as tight. it's been so long since you've been in her arms. so long since you smelled her scent. so long since you've even been around her.
“thank you for coming,” sydney says as she pulls away. not going too far as she stands close to you.
you laugh, “i'm the one who asked you. i should be thanking you.”
“for what?”
“for letting me back into your life.”
sydney's and your reunion is cut short by laura coming into the kitchen. she gives you two a look but doesn't say anything about your closeness.
“syd, you better get in here. it's your birthday party,” laura says, pointing to the living room. sydney looks at laura before looking at you. without thinking, you grab her hand and pull her out into the living room. time to party.
you ended up staying for longer than you thought you would in germany. sydney allowed you to stay in her spare room for the rest of your time there. the two of you have many, many conversations about where you two stand currently. she's not your girlfriend just yet, but you two are getting there.
when it's time for you to leave for america, sydney drives you to the airport and even blessed you with a kiss on the lips as a goodbye. your face is permanently flushed until you board the flight.
she texts you the moment you get off the plane back in san jose as well.
syd 💕
land safely?
you
yupp
but i miss you :(
syd 💕
miss you too :((
we'll see eachother soon
don't worry
you
call you when i get home?
syd 💕
call me when you get home
author note: i might possibly be working on an alt verison of this with sydney's pov.. depends on if my brain feels like working. hope yall enjoyed! 🙂↕️
Chapter 2 ● 3k / Ao3 / AU first meeting Bartender!Carlos and Paramedic!TK
title: Life is but a strand of happy accidents
Chapter Summary: TK continues to deal with the ramifications of his break-up while trying to work out how to move forward.
Preview:
The jacket and small velvet box were still on the floor. TK shook his head, pulling himself from the bed and leaving the apartment and the ghost that inhabited it.
TK had no idea where he was going. He could go to his dad's, but TK didn’t want to risk triggering his father's memory, wanting them both to continue living in this ignorance for a little while longer.
Maybe a friend? TK ran through the list of friends in his mind, it was much shorter than he remembered, and somehow they all knew Alex.
What if they knew what happened, what if they didn’t? TK wasn’t sure which option was worse. How had Alex stained so much of TK’s life?
He wrapped his arms around himself, the yellow hoodie providing a fraction of comfort. Maybe it was the cold, TK’s thin jumper, or the craving coursing through his body.
TK wasn’t sure how long he’d been walking for, maybe an hour, maybe less.
He should go home, go somewhere that wasn’t walking around the streets of New York. TK scanned his eyes at the people mulling around. It was late, most people were leaving restaurants or bars. There were a few people in suits that might be coming home from work.
Something caught TK’s eye.
Bars and restaurants he recognised. TK hadn’t even noticed where he’d been walking, hadn’t even been thinking.
His eyes scanned the bars and landed on the one in the middle.
Raven Tavern
The gold trimmings on the bar stared back at him. It has nearly been a week since he’d been at the bar, TK wished he could say it had been a week since he’d thought about having a drink, or so, something stronger. TK had spent the last five days partly trying to forget his trip to the bar and the other time trying to push the thought of the bartender out of his mind. It crept up on him, days when things would be a little quiet and for a brief moment TK wasn’t thinking about what had happened with Alex or how to lessen his pain thoughts of Carlos would creep into his head.
TK kept staring at the bar. He cocked his head to the side, he wondered if Carlos would be there.
TK felt his heart flutter, this time not from a craving in his mind.
Pairing: AJ (Siyoon) x Reader (Those unfortunate enough to own a uterus)
Prompt: Witch/warlock/wizard
Word Count: 1.1K
~Admin V
AJ dropped the bag of groceries on the counter. He was sure you were home. He called your name and looked in the living room. Then he heard a groan coming from the bedroom. He popped his head through the door and saw you curled up in a ball on the bed.
“Aww, baby.” He rushed to your side. He spoke a spell into his hands then placed one on your lower tummy and the other on your lower back.
Instantly the cramps began to lessen. You were able to unravel your body. AJ lay behind you and spooned you. He whispered little nonsensical things while rubbing your tummy. Soon the cramps were gone altogether.
“Thank you,” you whispered.
“Sorry I wasn’t here sooner.”
“S’okay.”
He kissed the back of your head. “How about I draw you a bath? You can let the rest of the tension out of your body.”
“But that means you won’t be cuddling with me.”
You could feel his smile behind you. “I don’t have to stop cuddling. I can draw it from here.”
You rolled over to face him. “You can do that?”
He gave a small smile. “I maybe will wait to light candles until I’m in the room, but I can definitely fill the tub from here.”
“You’re getting so powerful.”
He kissed your nose. “Just been practicing. You want rose petals?”
You shook your head. “Lavender.”
“Ah. And you want lilies floating.”
A small smile crept on your lips. “Maybe.”
His smile was filled with pride and he leaned closer and pressed his lips on yours. Then he licked his lips. “You taste good.”
You looked away from him and blushed. “I may have polished off the rest of the donuts.”
AJ chuckled. “As is your right when an organ is ripping itself out of your body.”
“I envy you. Lucky jerk. Must be nice having a penis and living a care free life. Can wear white anytime you want.”
He laughed this time. “You know I’m working hard on spells to make it like that for you, too.” He kissed your nose.
“I know,” you mumbled.
He pushed off the bed. “Come on. The bath is ready.” He held his hand out for you.
Another groan from you as you hugged your pillow, then you took his hand.
Candles sparked to life the second you walked into the bathroom. The tub steamed with milky-purple water, the lilies you requested floating on top.
AJ turned and kissed the tops of your hands. “I’ll leave you to it.” He winked and suddenly tranquil music was playing.
“Show off. You know this all will probably make me fall asleep.”
“I’ll keep the water warm if you do.” He walked to the door then turned back. “I’ll come back in a bit with a warm, fluffy towel, straight from the dryer.”
“You’re the best.”
“I know.” And with that, he left you alone.
After undressing, you carefully stepped in the tub. He had it right at the perfect temperature so that it wouldn’t burn your skin but it was deliciously warm. Once the water was up to your shoulders you leaned back and rested your eyes. As promised, the remaining stress in your body evaporated with the steam. The water never cooled down and stayed at that wonderful degree. If it wasn’t for the songs changing, you’d swear you’d only been in the bathroom for a minute.
When forty-five minutes passed, AJ knocked on the door. “I got your towel, baby.”
You gave him a sweet smile. “Thank you.”
He walked in a little. “You look so beautiful.”
Taken aback, blood rushed to your cheeks again.
AJ grinned and backed toward the door. “I’ll leave the towel next to the sink. You should come out soon before you raisin.”
“We both know I am fully raisined.”
Both of you laughed at that.
“Well don’t keep me waiting too long. I have everything set up.”
“Kay,” you murmered. You let one more song play, then pulled the plug in the tub. Once you were wrapped in the warm towel, you walked back to your bedroom. AJ had your most comfortable sweats laying out and one of his hoodies, complete with the smell of his shampoo and cologne.
You padded out to the living room and gawked at how different it looked.
The couch was moved against a wall and in front of the TV was a very large blanket and pillow fort.
“Perfect timing!” AJ walked carefully from the kitchen holding a big mug for you. “I read in a book about combining these herbs and they warm up your body. They should work to keep the cramps away.”
“Wow, that sounds really cool.”
He offered his hand and escorted you to the front of the fort.
Laughter immediately erupted when you saw every cushion and pillow in the house under the blanket tent. “Did you make sure there weren’t any peas under any of them? God forbid we be uncomfortable.”
He smiled and nudged your shoulder. “We will be in here for a movie marathon, so it needed to be the epitome of coziness.”
“Mission accomplished.”
“I’ll go in first.” He crawled in and sat back against a few propped up pillows. “Give me your mug.” You did. You noticed quite a few snacks as he set the mug down next to them. “Hand,” he ordered.
You placed your hand in his. He led you so you were sitting between his legs, your back against his chest.
“Look up,” he whispered in your ear.
Above you were twinkling lights and cutout gold and glittery stars.
“It’s so pretty, AJ. I love it.” You looked up at him and gave him a chaste kiss.
Another proud smirk on his lips. “Alright, so, the snack situation. On the right is everything salty. Salt and vinegar chips, hot wings, and mozzarella sticks with homemade ranch for dipping. On the left are sweets. Peanut butter cups, oreos, ice cream, and brownies.”
“Gods, I love you.”
He kissed your cheek. “Love you, too. And now the feature picture.” He snapped his fingers. Practical Magic began playing.
You giggled. “Really? It’s not a little right on the nose?”
“Are you saying you don’t want to watch it?”
“No.”
You felt his smirk again as he snaked his arms around your waist. “We’ll get through this moon cycle, baby.”
You nuzzled against him, then you both started quoting the movie. “. . . she had a gift. The gift of magic!”
Imagine. Hoseok bending you over one of the small dressers that instead of the top being wood, or something, it’s a mirror. So, you’re forced to watch both of you every time you open your eyes. You’re likely to have bruises on your hips from how hard Hoseok’s gripping your waist, and more on your thighs cause of how hard he’s pounding into you. And with how vocal this man is, and how loud he is, just imagine how he’s like when he cums. Loudly moaning and groaning into your neck as he pounds harder into you
tags- firefighter!abby, anxious!ellie ellabs, angsty, ellie and abby live together
abby comes home from work late, ellie is worried
[guys this is my first time writing fanfic, pls be nice and pls give me any tips. i know it's short and i rushed the end but it's late and im tired]
The rain softly fell, creating a soft rhythm against the windowpane. Ellie stood alone in the kitchen, her hoodie sleeves pulled over her hands as she nursed a lukewarm cup of tea. The house was quiet, too quiet for Ellies liking. All that could be heard was the rhythmic ticking of the clock-- '23:45'.
Abby was late.
Again.
Ellie tried her best not to worry, she understood the job, the stress, the unpredictable hours, the urgent calls and she sheer chaos that Abby faced day to day. She understood that it wasn't Abby's fault, but understanding alone didn't make things easier when her girlfriend, the love of her life, disappeared into thick smoke and fire, leaving her unreachable for hours on end.
But tonight was different, tonight Abby hadn't answered a single one of Ellie's texts, leaving Ellie with no other choice but to assume the worst.
Ellie sighed, running a hand through her short auburn hair, the strands clinging slightly to the sticky sheen of sweat that coated her palms. Ellie was stressing. As the looked around the kitchen the shadows felt heavier, scarier, more realistic. Her breathing began to sound much too loud in the silence of the room. She slowly made her way to the kitchen table, carefully sinking into the soft seat, her gaze drifting to watch the front door. She was waiting.
Ellie's eyes struggled to stay open, she slowly began to drift to sleep before being awoken by the soft **click** of the front door.
I'm walked Abby, her uniform soaked right through, rain dripping from her as she walked into the house. It was clear to see that she was exhausted. Her movements were slow and sluggish as she shrugged off her damp coat.
Ellie didn't say anything at first, just watched. Just took in Abby's dishevelled and exhausted appearance.
Wet curls of baby hairs clung to Abby's forehead, her cheeks were rosy and smudged with a layer of soot. Ellie found her eyes drawn to a deep scratch along Abby's jawline. It was clear that tonight had been rough.
Abby's eyes flicked across to Ellie as she hung up her coat. Both her expression and posture softening instantly at the sight.
"I'm sorry, els.." she mumbled, her voice sounding rough, as though smoke had settled there.
Ellie quickly pushed herself from her seat, smashing her mug harshly down onto the table with a loud thud, the loud noise causing Abby to flinch slightly. Ellie Abby at a fast pace. "What the hell, Abby?" she asked harshly, her hands colliding with Abby's damp chest, giving her a harsh push backwards.
Abby took a small step back, stabilising herself before she spoke. "Els.. we were called out for this huge fire.. one of the factories past route 7.. it.. it was bad els.. my phone-"
"Died? yeah. I've heard that one before." Ellie snapped back harshly, crossing her arms as she leaned back against the kitchen island. "How convenient for you."
Abby took a slow step towards her. "Els.. I know I worried you, I didn't mean to.. and I'm sorry. You know I would've messaged if I was able.. it was just.." She looks away, struggling to find the words to describe the horrors she had witnessed. "It was just a lot, Els, they needed me."
Ellie snapped again, her face scrunching into an angry scowl. "You scared the fucking shit out of me, Abby. Phone chargers exist for a reason. There's no excuse why you couldn't have just charged your phone and let me know you were okay. Literally no excuse Abby."
Abby paused, clearly not knowing how to reply in a way that would calm the situation. She glanced back down to meet Ellie's eyes, searching for any hint of sympathy, any hint of forgiveness.
Ellie remained silent, searching Abby's for a few moments before retreating to the laundry room, leaving Abby alone, cold, and wet in the silent kitchen.
Abby took a seat at the kitchen table, resting her elbows against the placemat. She began to think to herself, trying to understand what she had done wrong. She knew that she had scared Ellie, she knew that she should've texted, but she also knew that in the grand scheme of things her job had been the main priority at that point in time. She was saving lives, surely Ellie should understand Abby's decision to focus on work rather than searching aimlessly for a phone charger.
Abby's thoughts were soon inturupted by the sound of footsteps approaching. She kept her eyes down, studying the placemat instead of Ellie.
Ellie quietly sat down beside Abby, placing a warm pair of pyjamas fresh out of the dryer down infront of her, silently showing her love for her.
No matter what happens between them, they both know it will never last. Ellie tends to let her anger take the lead, especially when she's upset, but it's clear that her love and devotion towards Abby can quickly overcome the anger.
I like: mlp, the yellowjackets, the last of us, life is strange, the hunger games, stranger things, disney movies, SYLVANIAN FAMILIES!! and loads more!!
my favourite superhero is spider-man
my favourite disney princess is tiana
my favourite animals are monkeys
my favourite mlp is applejack
my favourite yj is van palmer
my favourite tlou is lev
I like to: play video games, read, watch movies, practice nail art, play guitar, write fanfic
