Morrigan was easily one of the strongest people Ellis had ever had the pleasure of meeting. Ellis had been at odds with himself for nearly a week now about it. It was a feeling that was easy to ignore initially, pin it on the fact that Morrigan was physically lovely. Ellis would admit that it was in his nature to chase after pretty girls, tossing his heart about at the most receptive option... but Morrigan was quite the opposite of that. In fact, she had made it abundantly clear that she wanted nothing to do with his heart. Unfortunately, it was also in Ellis’ nature to make things more complicated than they need be.
Before long, he had found himself relying on her counsel more & more. She was practical & cold enough to do what was necessary. She was truly brilliant... which made it particularly infuriating when he started becoming a touch too concerned for her wellbeing in battle. It had been happening more & more lately. Though she was easily one of his most capable companions he always seemed to find her in the corner of his vision. To make sure that she was safe.
Whether it was love or something else, it was getting in the way of battle, his thoughts, his sanity... he actually cared for her. It was not a feeling so easily swallowed. He had been pacing outside of his tent for an hour now, trying to slow his thoughts enough to make some sense of them. They came like a flood, causing his heart to beat a little too hard. Ellis wanted to tear his own hair out in order to stop the invasive & addictive feeling. He had to do something about it.
She was not a vessel for his good intent, she didn’t need protected. She was willing do whatever it took to survive & Ellis was beginning to fear he would do the same for her. There was an uncomfortable ache in the pit of his chest when he thought of her being hurt. He cared for her well being. It was like something had rooted in his lungs, constricting them every time he glanced across camp at Morrigan’s tent. He had never once denied that she was lovely, but that wasn’t it... He had previously thought himself to be too tired for love, but he may have been too quick to judge.
He does not think when his feet carry him across camp. He’s sure if he does, he will turn around & find a reason to let the feeling fester until he could not stand to look at her.
“ I’d like to discuss something personal. “ his mouth grows dry as he looks her in the eye, imagining what she might say. He lets the words hang uncomfortably in the air for a moment before he continues, almost irritated that he acknowledge it, “ about... us. “