#batty thoughts

[bookspined-batman]

Bruce doing the parent-name thing at the begining stages: (based on art by @ckalaveram )

*Bruce on the Batcomputer and Dick sparring with a dummy*

Bruce: Alfred, could you please come here a moment?

Dick, puzzled: Alfred is upstairs, Bee, you’d have to buzz him in.

Bruce, face in hands: I meant you. Come here. Please.

He wasn’t used to living with anyone else.

*Alfred, Jason and Bruce at dinner*

Bruce: Dickie, pass the salt.

Jason:

Alfred:

Bruce: Please??

Jason: Dicks not here, dad.

Out of spite, no one handed him the salt.

*post Jasons death, right as Tim became Robin*

Dick: I didn’t say kick at 180 degrees! I said 90!

Bruce, not looking up from his magazine: Jason, stop bullying your brother.

Tim:

Dick:

He never even noticed.

*Bruce, Dick, and Steph in the cave*

Bruce: Here hand this to Jason. No- Tim. No, I meant Tim hand this to Stephanie. No, FUCK.

Dick: *signs hands tool to Steph*

[ticklybat]

*finding a bunch of posts celebrating chubby lees*

*pats belly* fine, I guess I'll keep you.

[bat-hrt]

Sometimes you see a screenshot from a heavily modded game and it just looks like a Sparkly Anime Waifu and the Killmachine 9000

[roebeanstalk]

hmmmmm bat

[thebathatter]

I might ask something controversial yet brave: Why are Grace and Tommy in love? Like I understand their attraction to each other but am I the only one who thinks they fell deeply madly in love so quickly to the point where I was like damn why do you like each other?

They way I grew to understand their relationship was that Grace represents what Tommy wants to have in life you know pretty wife, big house, recognition and validation. I guess in a very Gatsby way it’s about how her love makes him feel. And vice versa with Grace as I feel she kind of thrives of the danger and uncertainty he represents to her coming from a more privileged background.

Just an observation.

[automaticnerdbread]

Thinking about a double life Into the Woods au rn.

[bookspined-batman]

Imagine Bruce using phrases he heard as a child with his kids and being glad they don’t have the same association he did. Bruce being slightly dismissive but knowing each and every one of his children see that he always has their best interest at heart.

Dick, skipping into the room: Can I go with my new friend to the pier tonight?

Bruce, puzzled: New friend? One I haven’t met? Alone, at night? Dick, you’re 11. So, uh, definitely not.

Dick, groaning: You’re ruining my social life, Bee.

Bruce: Well, I’m your guardian, not your friend.

—

Jason: Brucee, I’m boredddd…Bruce: Well, there’s probably cleaning to help Alfred with. Plenty of board games we could play. Tons of toys, video games and DvDs at your disposal.

Jason: Can we go to Italy? Please please please?

Bruce: Italy? Jaylad we have patrol tonight and that’s thousands of miles away.

Jason: You can’t keep me cooped up here!

Bruce: Oh, cooped up in the mansion with millions of dollars worth of entertainment? I feel so bad for you.

—

Tim: Can I buy this off Facebook Marketplace?

Bruce, looking at his phone: Tim, that’s $1,000 worth of whatever “miscellaneous clothes” may mean. Do I not buy you enough clothes? We can go shopping?

Tim, slightly annoyed: They aren’t for me, they’re to resell.

Bruce: My son, no. You are living in Wayne manor, with home cooked meals provided to you and all the clothing you could personally ever possibly wear.

Tim: You never let me do anything!

-

Damian: Can I drive the Batmobile tonight?

Bruce: No, son, you can’t drive yet. I’ve told you this.

Damian: You don’t trust me, father? I don’t understand how this relationship will work if you don’t trust me.

Bruce, sighs: I put you into this world, Dami, I can take you out.

(referring to crime fighting)

[bookspined-batman]

I love the jokes surrounding Bruce Wayne forgetting his kids aren’t biologically related to him. BUT I also like the idea of Bruce forgetting Damian is.

Like how he health screens all of his kids frequently, in which he asks questions he already knows the answers to, for documentation purposes. Sometimes the kids needed extra screenings, based on what’s known about their parents or their parent’s health. I’m imagining Damian doing a double take when Bruce first begins to ask the same type of questions that he asks Dick, Tim or Steph. “I don’t know, father, what is the status of my paternal grandparents?”

Bruce is going through paperwork and notices he has the same blood type as Damian. Out loud he mutters “how funny,” before realizing that, no, that just makes a bit of sense.

Damian asks Bruce why their eyebrows are so thick and he laughs, assuming “why would I know that, kids are so odd,” before remembering the Wayne eyebrows are genetic. It’s his fault.