john working on the impala in the driveway of a shitty rental house, sweaty and shirtless, with a cigarette permanently hanging out of the corner of his mouth
dean in the top room of said shitty house, watching dad through the curtains, jerking off, imagining how he smells up close
sam voyeuring like a little creep outside of that room, watching dean through the crack in the door and angrily jerking off too to thoughts of fucking dean in front of dad to show him who he really belongs to
john so busy under the hood that he can't even remember if his boys are in the house or not <3
6 years! For now 6 years I have participated in @intrulogicalweek and I still love these two more than any other ship! It's gonna be a few quite short stories, as I'm also a barista at the Sleepy Bean Fanfic Café over at @tss-camp-and-coffee, so I will need to split my creative focus. Still, please enjoy this silly little story 💙💚
Puzzled, Logan stopped in his tracks, trying to understand what he’d just heard. He’d been on his way back to his room when he suddenly heard his own voice, chopped and warbled coming from… somewhere. After a few seconds of waiting the noise started again and Logan managed to follow it to Remus’ door.
His curiosity piqued, he knocked but didn’t get an answer.
“Remus?” he called, but still nothing, just the weird noises continuing.
Unable to stop himself, Logan opened the door. Inside, he found Remus giggling over his laptop, hitting the spacebar and causing a repeat of Logan’s voice to shout “Stop ignoring me!”
“What are you doing?” Logan asked, suddenly finding himself right behind Remus and looking at the screen over his shoulder. He recognized an editing software of some kind before the other shrieked, startled by his sudden appearance. The chaotic side jumped out of his chair, causing it to crash to the ground. Then he turned around and stared at Logan with wide eyes.
“Lolo! You scared the shit out of me! Well done!” Remus grinned after he had calmed down.
“It was not my intention to surprise you. I did knock and call out to you, but you did not answer.”
“Ahhh, yeah, that makes sense. I was kinda absorbed into a little side project of mine.”
“Would you mind explaining to me what that project is about? I was confused when I heard my own voice coming out of your room.”
“Sure thing!” Remus used his foot to draw the fallen over chair closer to him but instead of turning it back up, he left it lying on its side, precariously sitting on the edge of the seat in a position that could not be comfortable. Logan chose not to comment, instead he leaned closer to get another look at the laptop screen.
“I’m rediscovering auto tuning for myself! And your outburst for the video was not only hot but also hilarious and the best material to just clip, y’know?”
“I see. Are you only using the voice track or are you editing the entire video?”
Remus’ face lightened up at Logan’s continued interest and started clicking some buttons.
“Oh, a video of course! Go big or go home is not only Pissy’s motto, y’know! Let me show you my vision!”
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars - All Media Types
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Qui-Gon Jinn & Obi-Wan Kenobi, Jango Fett/Obi-Wan Kenobi
Characters: Padmé Amidala, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Qui-Gon Jinn, Jango Fett, Shmi Skywalker, Anakin Skywalker
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon Divergence - Star Wars: The Phantom Menace, Pre-Relationship
Series: Part 2 of Dress Code Violations
Summary:
After their failure to negotiate with the Neimoidians of the Trade Federation, Qui-Gon Jinn and his Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi escape Naboo in company with Queen Amidala and some of her people, only to have to land on Tatooine for repairs to their damaged starship. Qui-Gon once again seizes upon an old stratagem in order to keep the queen from harm, only for the plan to go awry upon the discovery of very changed circumstances on Tatooine.
Going to try and make this the fluffiest thing on the planet (idk how well I can write kidfics but challenge accepted I guess)
---
Danny slams his head against his locker.
“That kinda day?” Tucker asks from his left.
“That kinda month,” Danny slumps.
“It’s the second,” Sam says from his right.
“Yep,” Danny groans.
The two pat him consolingly on his back.
“Lay it on us, we can handle it,” Tucker says.
There’s a beat of silence before Danny sighs a gust of air frosting his locker. “You know how I was in the Zone yesterday?”
“Yeah?”
“Well-”
“Daddy!” a high pitched voice squeals from down the hall. The entire population of students turning to the voice.
A small child darts amongst the sea of bodies, a mop of pink hair standing bright against dark skin.
“Jay!” Danny exclaims in surprise. He bends down just in time to catch the child who flings themselves into his arms.
“Daddy?” Sam and Tucker echo.
“What are you doing here?” Danny asks them.
“Missed you,” they say, burying their head into his shoulder.
“Uh, Danny?” Sam lays a hand on his shoulder.
“This is Jellyblue,” Danny starts when Dash spots them.
"Fentina??" He calls, eyes wide. "The fuck is that."
"A child, you know? Small young people? A little older than a baby?" Danny quips.
"I know what a child is but tha-" Jellyblue turns in Danny's arms to look up at Dash with big brown eyes. "-at's actually adorable. Hello little guy."
The trio blink. Sam and Tucker exchanging faces behind Danny as Jellyblue smiles big. They have a missing front tooth.
"Ma name's Jellyblue! Am from the Zone!" Jellyblue declares.
Kwan smiles back, leaning down to be eye level with them. "That's cool! What's it like there?"
"Lonely and then dad found me and now am not lonely no more!" Jellyblue says, hugging Danny.
"Uh, why was a kid in the Zone to begin with?" Sam asks.
"I think they fell through a transient portal," Danny says.
"Daddy, daddy, daddy-" Jellyblue fists Danny's shirt and tugs.
"Yes, yes, yes, what is it?" Danny bounces Jellyblue making them squeal in delight.
"Why aren't there any floating cars no more?" They ask.
Danny and co blink.
"Floating cars?" Dash repeats.
"Yeah! I remember 'fore everything was green 'n purple, every body drove flying cars."
"What year do you think it is, Jellyblue?" Tucker asks.
"2893."
At this point the entire hallway of students is silent.
"Well that explains that." Danny half laughs.
"My planet was esploded-" Jellyblue makes a big motion with their hands. "Mommy said to find the [garbled] king, and I found you!"
"King of losers, you mean," Dash crows with laughter.
"Knock it off, Dash," Danny rolls his eyes hefting Jellyblue a little higher in his arms.
"Danny!" Jazz’s voice calls over the din of students. She pushes her way through the crowd, "I'm so sorry, I took my eyes off them for one minute and- oh you found them."
"Sorry Jazz, Jay followed me to school," Danny says.
"Yes yes yes, what's wrong, bud?" He rubs a thumb on Jellyblue's cheek, wiping away his tears.
"You're not a loser! Your cool! Why is he being mean?" Jellyblue wails.
"Oh Jellyblue," Danny puts a hand on the back of his head to pull him into a tight hug, "It's okay, that's just how Dash shows affection."
"I do not!?!" Dash squeaks.
"Being mean is..." Jellyblue sniffs.
"Still being mean," Danny says. "Don't be like Dash, he's just confused."
"I am not confused, Fentina!" Dash half shouts, half squeaks, which doing his best impression of a cooked lobster.
"You know, it’s a natural physiological phenomenon for a person to be embarrassed about feelings they don’t fully understand and it often leads to an avoidance of the deeper introspection that-" Dash holds up his hand in Jazz’s face, cutting her off.
"Yeah, I'm going to stop the talking textbook there-"
"Rude!"
"-good luck with the kid Fentoe-nail," he says before turning to walk away. "What're you losers looking at? Scram!"
The crowd disperses leaving the trio plus Jazz and Jellyblue alone.
"You know the entire school will know about him-"
"Them."
"Sorry, about them by the end of first period." Sam says.
"Wanna bet the whole school knows before it starts?" Tucker asks, fiddling with his PDA.
Sam squints at him, "...no. I don't think I will."
"What's the plan, little brother?" Jazz asks, pulling Jellyblue from him.
Jellyblue goes easily, smooshing their face into Jazz’s shoulder.
"Not to be that person, but their hair is pink," Tucker says glancing up.
"And?"
"Their name is Jellyblue?"
Jellyblue lifts their head, hair turning periwinkle purple, and skin shifting to something more green. They blink, bright blue eyes shining.
"Only you Danny, only you," Sam pats Danny consolingly.
It describes its face as "standard, generic human" - but it was made in the Corporation Rim, which 10000% has exaggerated beauty standards in order to sell upgrades to anyone and everyone who can afford them
In Exit Strategy, the first thing Ratthi says to it is "You look great!" and I like to headcanon Ratthi as, while always entirely respectful, an utterly incorrigible flirt a la Captain Jack Harkness, and Murderbot just 100% failed to notice because of course it did
Title: My Unfortunate Erection
Author: sunflower_swan (me!)
Fandom: Harry Potter
Rating: M
Pairing: none, Ron-centric
Tags: erections, masturbation, pranks and practical jokes, humor
Word Count: 1.4k
Summary: Why does Ron keep getting erections during DA meetings? Is it normal teenage hormones or something more sinister? What can he do to stop them?
I finally have time to share this! Written for the @hp-make-it-musical-fest! When I saw this prompt come in, I looked up the song and about died of laughter. It was a test of patience to wait and let the other participants finish their claims before I jumped on it. Thank you @olliemaye for the beta! Thank you @hellocinnamonfreckles, @sophhao3, and @pandora-rose-xo for helping me mod the fest!
A warm, throbbing sensation began pulsing in his groin.
Oh, shit...
Looking down, his robes had started to form a small tent. He was a young, hormonal teenager; these things were normal. It hadn't happened in public at an inopportune moment for a few years, but it was still a normal part of being a teen. What he wouldn’t give for Fred and George to cause a trademark distraction at this exact moment.
Ok, um... think of something unsexy...
Aunt Muriel.
Voldemort’s nose.
Quidditch.
Cold showers.
Professor Snape.
Shit!
Ron's heart beat faster as the unfortunate problem grew more pronounced. Usually thinking of Professor Snape was enough to turn any erection inside out. His eyes darted around at the other members of the DA.
saying straight male celebs are dykes on tumblr is so funny bc like. what are they gonna do? those middle aged white men, they’re not on this site. i can say whatever i want and know it will never be seen by the celebs i mention
