#dbd jeff

[gab-bab]

rare dbd shitpost from yours truly

Thought of him immediately and had to doodle it LOL

[nytedove]

Jeff and Jake...🐺🐺

[dead-by-mending]

Eddie, on hook : Y'know... You're actually pretty cool... Cooler than most other psychos around here anyway...

Frank, camping because he knows other survivors are nearby : If you say so

Eddie : You'd be a terrific rogue in DnD...

Frank : Eh, I'm more of a mage. When I don't play DM anyway.

Eddie : ...Wait, you play DnD ?

Frank : Sometimes, yeah, with my buddies.

Eddie : Oh man, you gotta invite me to one of your games. I could even try to bring some...spices ?

Frank : Yeah, no thanks, our stash is full enough.

Eddie : Your- Alright, I see you're hard with negotiations. Bet I can impress with my "stock".

Frank : Oh please, we got all kinds, even..."flour". Please don't tell Kate...

Eddie : Holy shit. Another junkie who plays DnD ? I thought this was supposed to be hell !

Frank : Yeah, it's definitly not like some album covers.

Eddie : ...What albums ?

Frank : First that comes to mind is "Highway to Hell", obviously. Maybe "Number of the beast" or "Peace sells but who's buying". At least that's how I interpret it for the latter...

Eddie : Metalhead too ?! Oh man... And to think one of my last moments was playing Metallica...

Frank : Wow. "Ride the thunder" ?

Eddie : "Master of puppets"

Frank : Oh man, I wish I could've seen that...

. . .

Eddie : Did we just become best friends ?

Frank :

Frank : Don't push it.

Jeff, hiding nearby : What

[deadbydangit]

As Coworkers

Jeff, Ghostface, Mastermind

Jeff Johanson

It's amazing how someone can be both constantly late and constantly early at the same time.

But Jeff pulls it off.

He's either an hour late or an hour early.

And there is no in between.

Why was he late?

"Concert last night, I overslept."

"Ran into some people. Started talking."

And you know he's not lying.

Because he's always super straightforward about it.

But he always profusely apologizes and offers to do more work.

And when he's early?

"I couldn't sleep last night. So I just came in."

"I got inspired and just needed to come in early."

And he's super willing to help out in any way possible.

Can't reach something?

He's got you.

But he's going to tease you for being short.

Can't make it to work one day?

"I'll spot you if you spot me next Friday."

Not feeling good?

"Go sit in the back for a few minutes. I'll cover the front."

As long as you're contributing, he's more than willing to help you out.

Jeff also remembers everyone's birthday.

Even if it was only said once, he remembers.

And he always brings in something for whoever's birthday it is.

Usually a hand drawn picture of them or something they like.

He's fallen asleep at work.

Multiple times.

And he can fall asleep in a heartbeat.

You'll be talking to him and then suddenly you hear snoring.

Just let him sleep.

But make sure to shake him awake when the boss comes by.

He'll be sure to thank you for that by bringing you a piece of chocolate or some candy.

Sometimes he brings his pup to work with him.

Friendliest creature on four legs you've ever met.

And so well trained.

When Jeff says, hide, the dog runs under the nearest structure to hide from the boss.

He is aware he isn't supposed to have his dog with him.

"He looked so sad when I left today I couldn't help it."

Ghostface

The word, "Asshole" comes to mind when describing him in the work place.

He's not an ass to anyone in particular.

He's an ass to everyone.

But not in the, "douche bag, I'm better than you. I'm absolutely getting that promotion. Don't even try loser." Type of way.

He's the typos always teasing someone no matter what.

And Danny can be relentless when he's teasing.

HRs worst fucking nightmare.

How he still has this job is unknown to anybody.

Office pranks?

Uh, duh!

And some of them are borderline cruel.

He loves finding out people's weaknesses and exploiting them.

The only credit you can give him is that he does them to everybody.

"Oh yeah, I put worms in Dave's coffee. Tomorrow I'm tying Sandra's shoes together. Friday is Tom's birthday so I hired some clown to come and scare him."

"I have your prank scheduled for next Thursday."

And even though he's told you, you'll still get surprised.

It seems like he does more pranking than actual working.

That being said, if work really needs to get done, Danny will double down.

Project everyone is struggling on.

"I got this."

Surprisingly, he can be really effective leader too.

He knows everyone's strengths and weaknesses and no set of delegate tasks accordingly.

And, believe it or not, he will praise you.

In his own asshole sort of way.

"Nice work. I'm totally not going to put snakes in your lunch bag tomorrow."

He'll work overnight if he has to.

And you'll find him asleep on his desk the next morning.

Make sure you take that time to prank him back.

Because he needs a check on his ego.

Mastermind

If you want to talk about assholes, you also have to talk about Wesker.

But, he's a different type of asshole than Danny.

Instead of the fun goofy kind that pulls pranks and teases people, Albert is malicious and insults everyone he comes across.

You could be doing your best and that still won't be enough.

Oh, did I say coworker?

I meant boss.

This mother fucker is the boss.

And he is the most demanding, arrogant, and self entitled boss you will ever meet.

And he always gets what he wants.

But you can't deny it; he gets shit done.

He knows who's worth keeping and who isn't.

"If you can't manage to pull an all nighter without complaining, then go home."

"I don't have room for sniveling fools to complain all the time."

And as cruel and unorthodox as his methods are, he actually will take the time to teach you new things.

If he deems you worth teaching, that is.

"This is a new program, I've scarcely used it. I can't expect someone like you to pick up on it instantaneously."

"Come, we'll go over it together. Perhaps you'll prove yourself."

It's praise in his own condescending demeaning way.

Because of these ruthless tactics, people rarely stay with his company.

But those who do, those who prove themselves to be loyal and worthy, he treats with the utmost respect he can muster up.

Which still isn't a lot, but, at least he might try and learn your name.

And the paychecks?

He pays handsomely.

"I reward those who stick beside me. I'm aware I'm not always the easiest to put up with."

"This job is demanding, difficult, much too difficult for the average human. It is only natural to reward those who are stronger than the rest."

"Keep up the good work. Perhaps you aren't as useless as I first believed you to be."

[bottleblondebeachbabe]

[dat-is-i]

a 1 year old and jeff the survivor

[ashrooms]

My Dead by Daylight Cosmetic Contest Submissions! I had NO clue what killer skin I wanted to make... and they showed the Singularity and I had this idea!

[zen-zen-v]

Jeff in his 20s