#dealing with rejection

[brittanyjewelmiller]

“I’m still a bit upset that I lost my position as head cheerleader.”

“It bubbles up now and then. I don’t WANT to be upset about it. I am very much enjoying the extra free time.”

“It’s just…I put my heart and soul into every routine, every performance, to have it all taken away suddenly feels like having the red carpet yanked out from under me.”

“I would say “the rug,” but I am a DIVA and divas deserve a red carpet. That reminds me. We need to work out some new red carpet looks…just in case.”

[agirlwithglam]

hey girl,

can you give me any tips to deal with rejection. i wasnt rejected from a boy or a friendship but for smth school related. for a research project, we had to pick our top 3 subjects that we wanted to write the essay about and also give a potential research question for the project. i had i really good research project that i really wanted to do, but the results came back today and i didnt get any of the 3 subjects that i wanted, so i cant do the project that i wanted.

i feel so upset (literally crying as im writing this) cuz it makes me feel like even if i try super hard for smth, i will never get picked and will always be the 2nd choice.

any tips would be much appreciated <3

hi love, that must have felt so terrible to go through that and i understand how it could take a hit to your self esteem :(( first of all, i want you NOT to suppress these emotions. let yourself feel it, let yourself get angry at it for a while to get it out of your system just for however long you need (max 2-3 days tho) so that you have the ability to accept it and move on. here are some tips love <3

dealing with rejection (personalised ask)

pretty please, don't let this define you. don't let this bump in your beautiful, wild journey, adventure of a life prevent you from working hard in the future. rejection, esp in things like school, work, etc, isnt always about you or your amazing abilities, but sometimes its just logistics, or luck, a system that is unable to see your full potential. but none of that changes the fact that your idea was great, valid and something to be proud of. if you were proud of it in the beginning and you genuinely thought that you did a good job,🗣 don't let the opinions and decisions of other people change that! failure is not a reflection of who you are or your character.

if it was meant for you, it would have been. ESPECIALLY if you put so much hard work into it! in the hindu culture, it is said that in whatever you want to do/ succeed at, you must try your very hardest then let god decide the outcome. at first, i was a bit skeptical because like, i worked so hard on something then what god can just be like nahhh you don't get this?? obviously, now i understand and i hope you do too. sometimes, when you think you want something, it may not always be whats meant for you/ whats right for you. maybe you may not know it, but god knows what more hardships and struggles and negatives could have some with that. it sounds dramatic, but so does a man just walking into the louvre museum and simply taking the mona lisa (actually happened). OR.. you could be thinking small. you could be thinking '🌷' when god's plan for you is '💐' !!!

what if i told you you needed to get rejected at least 10 more times before you could get the dream life you wanted? how excited would you be to get rejected now? "but thats stupid, why would god do that if he could give me my dream life rn?" i asked that once. but these experiences and feelings of getting rejected that dealing/ coping with it afterwards is whats going to get you prepared for your absolute dream life. the lessons and experiences you now have stored in your inventory will last you the lifetime and who knows how many people you'll be able to help, or what amazing, incredible things you could do with this new knowledge now!!

okay. so something didn't happen the way you'd have liked to. its time to use this emotion as fuel, powering yourself to do better, to shine brighter, prove them all wrong!! now you are gonna go and be the best person you can ever be by taking the subjects that you did get and making it the best possible. can you do that? because maybe the lesson from this is experience is going to teach you that yes, even if you don't get what you want, you are that baddie that not only do you still complete the work, but you absolutely CRUSH IT AND LEAVE NO CRUMBS!!!

anyways i hope this helped you honey! please don't hesitate to ask me again if you need more advice <3

bmac

xoxo, vanilla

[bitchesgetriches]

Hello beloved bitches! How do you cope with the anticipation of job news? I’m waiting to find out if I got into the phd program of my dreams, and before that to be invited to the recruitment weekend at said program. The invitation could come any day and it’s making me extremely unhealthily obsessed with checking my email!! How do I put the anticipation down??

You say to yourself, "Well that was a fun opportunity. Too bad I didn't get it" and then move on with your life.

Convince yourself that you've already been turned down so you can focus on other things and not hyperfocus on the uncertainty. That way when you DO get accepted to the PhD program, it'll come as a lovely surprise while you're busy doing something else.

I used to do this during high school theater auditions. Now I do it for job applications. Works like a charm!

I Just Applied for a Job. How (And When) Should I Follow Up? 

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[fauxjean]

Sorry for not being able to give you what you needed. I am truly sorry because nobody ever taught me how to receive love, nor did they ever show me how to give one

[foodiewithdahoodie]

One of my fav openings for a song ever. Far by SZA

[Intro: SZA & Sadhguru]

How do I deal with rejection?

I'm dealing with a lot of rejection right now

It makes me feel very small

Oh, that's great

If nobody wants you, you're free

[peachblossomstudy]

a few notes on rejection

hello! this is probably going to be one of the longest text posts i’ve written on this blog, but i have a few things that i think might help some people. but first, an apology for being so inactive in the original content department. winter is always where i get quite burnt out and in the uk it gets dark at around 4pm so lighting for pictures is awful. i’m still on holiday at the moment so i have time to start taking photos and queueing posts again, so hopefully i will be less inactive this month!

now that’s out of the way, on with what i actually wanted to talk about. at the end of november i was rejected by my dream university - the one i’d spent my whole life dreaming of going to, the one that had everything i was looking for in a university, the one that was perfect. i didn’t post about it at the time, and i was debating posting about it even now, but i decided that i wanted to share some of the things i learnt about academic rejection over the last few months (these are in no particular order and are probably somewhat incoherent):

it’s okay to be upset. being upset is a completely natural reaction - nobody’s going to expect you to take a rejection with joy or even just with a straight face. have a good cry about it if that’s how you feel (i certainly did). sometimes you have to let your emotions be felt and let yourself deal with that, rather than immediately trying to move on.

once you are ready to start moving on, try and get excited about something else - there were other unis i applied to that i wanted to go to, so i started looking at their websites and finding things about them that excited me. your something else may not be academic or another university, but i think it’s important to find other things to look forward to in the wake of rejection.

many people told me something along the lines of ‘rejection is redirection’. this may be kind of cheesy, but i helped me remember that my dream uni wasn’t the be all and end all of my life, and that there are other directions i could go in that i might not even know about now! hopefully in the years to come i can look back on this post and say where i was redirected to, but i know that there are still plenty of good things coming.

as someone who is lucky enough not to have yet experienced a major bereavement this may be an inappropriate or incorrect comparison, but the experience of rejection struck me as similar to the experience of grief. you can be completely fine, then someone mentions something that reminds you and the sadness hits you. you can be going about your business and suddenly remember that you’ve lost an opportunity and it will hit you all over again. i’m aware that this is probably all rather overly dramatic, but academic rejection is somewhat a small bereavement, you will find yourself grieving for a lost future, and that’s okay.

it may be hard to be happy for people who got accepted where you didn’t, but my thoughts were that their getting a place/interview/offer (especially if they were applying for a different course) didn’t actively reduce my chances of getting one. 

in the same vein as the previous point, another thing i think helped me is that being sad about getting rejected won’t magically mean the decision gets reversed. after i’d allowed myself to be sad, this mindset was useful in picking myself up and looking towards other things.

as a final point i wanted to say that rejection does not make you any less worthy of love, success or great things in life. you are amazing, hardworking and a wonderful person - rejection does not define you.

if you’ve stuck around to here i’m extremely grateful. this post is much more personal than anything i usually write on here, so i may regret the mortifying ordeal of being known and delete this. the aim of this post was to share my experience, my (rather unsure) advice and hopefully help at least one other person going through the same thing. if you have anything to add, please, please reblog and add it, i’d love to hear it <3

[tfw-adhd]

@toomanyacronyms​

First of all, try to remember that people with ADHD are rejection sensitive. It’s not your fault, but you’re going to take comments like that a lot harsher than a neurotypical would. Personally, I find that remembering this can help me feel a bit better, because I can tell myself that the comment wasn’t intended to be as hurtful as I think it was.

Second, remember you’re not alone. So many people have ADHD or other neurodivergencies, and are struggling too. You may not see them in day to day life, but we’re here. It’s not just you.

Third, remember that if they think you’re weird, that’s their problem, because it just shows that they’re not open-minded enough to accept people who are even slightly different to them. You’re just being you, and you’re great.

For this specific situation - obviously I wasn’t there when they said it, but it strikes me as an odd comment for a co-worker to make unless they’re a really rude person. Maybe they were only joking, and you didn’t pick up on their tone. If they weren’t, then I’m really sorry that they said that to you! But again; you’re not alone. I spent most of high school being called weird, and so did a lot of people.

I hope things get better for you. <3

[feelingthingsdeeply]

43. the Self Love Advent Calendar” 22/24 Baggage