#decent mood

[sssapplebottomjeans]

love you guys

[fizzyxcustard]

I’ve got a headache but I feel in a strangely peaceful mood. What??? Hahahah!

[saturn-ptsd-blog]

Happy!!!

Since my med change I have been able to laugh at my mistakes and mishaps. I am also sleeping better. No fucking nightmares and ghosts of flight attendants any more. And my mood is a bit better but I still fly off like a fucking jet liner... which I am still working on with no success but I keep trying to keep my anger in check but sometimes it sneaks up on you and you don’t see it coming. But I am only human how that fuck can control their fucking anger?! An iPod Touch that’s who because it is not human. I don’t want to be a robot but I want my anger to go down in Intensity and not have flashbacks sand suicidal thoughts. It is a fucking struggle to do this but I have to fight the anger management jihad inorder to get better or I will never get a girl friend or friends. And if I can not get my anger under control then the idea of a girlfriend will go out like a little balloon and pop in my pretty little face. So I declared a fatwa against my PTSD for romance’s sake. Because other lesbians would not want to hang with a person who spazzes out all the fucking time. But the medicine is a step in the right direction but it is not going to be the whole Arsenal against my anger and emotions so I read, do art listen to music and etc. to stop my anger. Some times it works and sometimes it doesn’t work and some times it works.

[dear-dysfunctional-diary]

Entry #3 -June 21st , 2017 @ 12:50a.m.

Dear Dysfunctional Diary, I saw my therapist. She was able to help me understand some things a lot better. Obviously nothing she could say would make my problems dissappear, but her explaining stuff to me about my mental health definitely made living with it easier. I head on a 4+hr road trip when I wake up and I’m scared. I hate being in cars. I panic the whole time and feel I’m going to die, especially when on the interstate, which is where we will mostly be. Otherwise I’m excited. I’m getting to have a mini vacation and talk about some very important stuff with a doctor. I truly look forward to being there. I think I’ll enjoy myself. Although, the bad part is that if things don’t go well with the doctor, it could send me on a very bad downwards spiral, worse than the one I’ve already been in. So, I’m fearful due to that as well. Either way, I’m going to try and make the best out of this trip and have a good time. I need this break. I don’t know if I’ll post while on the trip, but if not I should be back on Friday night. My mood is mostly okay right now. I keep getting anxious about the trip, but otherwise I am okay. I feel better than I have lately for sure. I can only hope this sticks for a while, though I know it won’t forever. I guess I’m just going to try to relax and maybe sleep soon. Goodnight. Sincerely, Your dysfunctional author

Ps. all posts like this will be tagged with #deardysfunctionaldiary

[tcmmy]

i won’t be on much for the next week. i hope everyone has a great week filled with happiness and lots of good things happen :-)

[deliciouswinnerpenguin]

feeling oddly content with my situation right now...so weird but yet relaxing...

[evacu0]

If when you make two sandwiches you don't top each one with completely different condiments and such then I won't listen when you talk about your life being boring.,

[xinheartswakeex]

I feel so inspired today. I feel so much stronger than ever before. :)