#dispatch sdn

[dadouuuusworld]

Christmas at SDN, fun, mistletoes and a little office prank.

I hope with all of my heart that you guys will get the reference haha.

Robert in getting bullied on my blog lmao, sorry pookie.

[someone-news]

Robert Robertson but the only thing that's different is at any time that anyone asks him about his former superhero identity he just makes something up and lies without it Giving everyone a different story.

● I'm Track Star. (Chase just dying in the other cubicle)

● I'm blonde blazers evil twin... Uh cousin. (I don't think that's how twins work Robert.)

● I used to weigh 600 lb but I lost it all in an accident. (Ozamic factory exploded)

● I died but that was only for 2 weeks, I got better. (Only you Robert)

● I have telepathic powers but my migraine stop me. (Half truth migraines suck)

● I self destructed like a pokémon (I mean he did explode)

● I used to have 100 ft of hair before I cut it off. (Especially if they're making fun of his hair)

● I assassinated Archduke Franz Ferdinand (sonar is the only one smart enough to get that one)

● I knocked too many people socks off. (He says that the prism and prism alone)

● I made lightning strike twice. (Asking weather powers)

● I divorce the CEO's daughter. (The CEO's daughter doesn't exist)

● I used to be 50 ft tall. (In the Mech suit)

● I was originally a villain before my best friend died in accident and I changed my ways. (Trying to get them to be better heroes)

● I lost an eye but it grew back (Robert being Robert)

● I became a houseplant (I can legitimately see that happening)

● I was never born (How are you alive?)

● I had The Incident I can't talk about it because of copyright. (Poking fun at dispatches weird way of copyrighted brands somehow being in there)

● I signed an NDA (if asked again.)

The Z Team all getting different stories realizing Robert is just bsing them The pot starts to get even higher from the amount of money to try to figure out what kind of hero Robert was after basically everyone knows that Robert is lying About what kind of hero he is he tells Flambae that he's Mecha Man in the same way and Flambae thinks Robert is just lying again until the bar fight.

[stffed]

mr. hr - dispatch x male reader

warnings: swearing, hr violations a/n: choose your own romance! little prologue here and you (yes, you) get to choose which hero/villain gets their own disciplinary chat. comment and/or reblog with who you'd like to chastise and within 3-5 days they'll get their own little thing. please keep it gay - no invisigal especially just because i don't really gel with her character/story arc

you didn't know what went through your mind when you applied to be a hr representative at the torrance branch of sdn. you knew that it was filled with villains going through rehabilitation as part of the phoenix program, but you had no idea of the amount of violations they would go through each shift. especially the members of the z-team.

"flambae, this is the third complaint you've received this week," you said. the paperwork in front of you was just from today and it already reached the top of your computer. "you can't go around calling fellow employees and subscribers bitches."

"this is fucking ridiculous," said flambae. he sat across from you without a care in the world. he seemed to be more focused on his hair than the disciplinaries he faced.

"what's more ridiculous," you said, "is the hostile work environment several ex-dispatchers have said you helped create."

"not my fault they're bitches."

you had to stop yourself from throwing your mug at him. flambae was one of the better z-team members. he didn't have as many complaints as the others did. your main gripe with him was his vulgar language.

"just," you sighed. he wasn't going to listen today so there was no point in going over the same points again. "try to cool it with the swearing. the next complaint will end in suspension."

flambae gave you a half-assed thumbs up before leaving. you scribbled down the outcome of the meeting and moved on to the next file. invisigal. she had the most complaints out of everyone in the branch. while being invisible was her superpower, the way she abused it was problematic.

the door opened. robert walked in, flashing you a smile. "how's it going, mr. hr?"

"terribly," you groaned. robert took a seat opposite you. "half of your team should have been fired a long time ago. but no, sdn wants to prove that villains can be rehabilitated. they literally do not care about consequences. at all!"

"well maybe they just want to see the cute hr guy," robert passed you one of his twinkies.

you cautiously took it from him. "they can do that without fucking over my mental health. and you're on thin ice already. don't think i forgot about phenomaman's comment about your kiss."

he cringed. you smirked.

robert had his own stack of complaints against him. it wasn't as much as the one's his team members had but it was still a decent size. none of them warranted a suspension or even a disciplinary. you still found it funny to bring it up to him.

"do you have to keep bringing that up?" he groaned. he tried to take the twinkie from you but you snatched it out of his grasp. "i attended the seminar and wrote an apology."

you took a bite of the twinkie. "what about that time you threw a protein shake at flamabe?"

"i said i was sorry."

a chuckle left you. despite the job being literal torture for almost every single minute, the small moments like this were what kept you from handing in your notice.

"anyway," you waved him off. "i've got several others heroes to chastise, so if you would."

robert took the hint and stood up. he spared you one last glance at the door, unspoken words heavy on his tongue, before he left you. you finished off the twinkie, took a look at invisigal's file and sighed.

it was going to be a long day. made even longer by the person knocking at your door.

[fandom-skellyweirdo-jumper]

The Adventures of Knuckles & Knives#1(?)

*Everyone's (emphasis on everyone's) paychecks at SDN got cut for no good reason, including Robert's pay*

*one day later*

*Robert spots Punch up and Coupe coming into the parking lot, having borrowed Flambae's car for some reason, and storms out to meet them*

Robert: Hey! Where the fuck have you two been? You missed the entire morning shift.

Punch up: Ah! Lad! We were just about to get ya. We uh...

Coupe: We unfortunately missed our morning shift because we had an appointment with the SDN's CEO regarding the cut in everyone's pay.

Robert: An appointment? With the CEO? The fuck's that suppose to mean!?

Punch up: Well, we had a proper diplomatic discussion with the man. It wasn't a very long a discussion really, because all we asked was for us, and everybody else, to get a fair day's pay after a fair day's work.

Robert *suspicious as fuck but has some trust*: Okay.

Punch Up: But then the arsehol- *cough* I mean Mister CEO got a little angry with us, and I'll admit, since you've always been honest with us lad, me and Coop also got a little angry right back.

Robert *sweating bullets now & whisper screaming to not be overheard*: Did you two kill him?!

Punch Up *complete opposite, so chill*: Oh, come off it, Robert. Do ya take us for a pair of wild fucking animals? You know Coop doesn't kill without pay, anyhow.

Robert *feels like he'll faint from relief*: Aww thank fuck.

Coupe *opens car boot*: But we did kidnap his wife.

Robert: OH NO! OH SHIT!

Coupe: We kidnapped her for ransom.

Robert: YOU KNOW THAT'S JUST FUCKING BARELY BETTER, RIGHT?! RIGHT?!

Source: Paraphrased/Inspired by GTA.

[helenkyle]

It was a special corporate event...

I saw Robert in these kinky boots by canismarvae on X and decided that I NEED Sonar in these boots too! I think it suits him 😏

[bluueejayart]

I’d sell some organs for for a Robbie Robertson / Mecha Man Astral resurrection fic where he shows up for one reason or another. Whether it be a timeline thing, an enemy with the ability to temporarily resurrect people, or simply the universe punishing Robert for existing- whatever the device may be, Robbie "Astral" Robertson II is alive and stood before them all.

((I think Royd would have some feelings, given the talk that Robert and Royd had in game about the fact that, upon leading Royd to the path of Heroics- that Astral and Royd had more of a conversation than Robert and Astral had in Robert's entire lifetime.))

And, with that resurrection and presentation- comes all the unbridled angst and unprocessed feelings with it. The Z-Team sees Robert, not as Mecha Man Blue or as their Dispatcher, but as someone who just wanted his dad to love him and be proud of him and who undoubtedly has some complicated feelings about 'avenging' a man he probably didn't know well enough to like, let alone love as thoroughly as a son should love his father and who likely has a plethora of parental issues and emotional issues related to it.

Blah blah, it gets to Astral is laying into Robert about not "getting up" the right way, destroying the suit and not beating Shroud the first time around, losing the Pulse initially, his failures to upkeep the suit and relying on others for help- who knows what the man would complain about. Astral would probably not excited that Mecha Man Blue is working for SDN, moreso if he gets into Robert being the Z-Team's dispatcher. More and more, Astral is just laying into Robert and knowing him, Robert is probably just taking it on the chin and not doing anything about it.

(I may be making Astral a little OOC here, but as far as we know about him- He refused to let the Brave Brigade hold a vote to allow Shroud publicly entry into the group likely for severely selfish reasons, and openly beat the breaks off of Elliot when the man finally snapped and challenged him to a fight because of that- all of which led in large part to his death. Astral repeatedly left his son in the custody of the youngest member of the Brave Brigade, which is a whole other thing, and when Robert tries to express his frustrations in the damaging of the Mecha Man suit, Astral is famously less than sympathetic to Robert's injuries. While I'm sure with more characterization, he could be described as a father who maybe prioritized his own wants over others and who may have wanted his young son to be able to bravely stand in the face of dangers and injuries- especially for when Astral is gone- his current characterization does Not paint him kindly and the fact that in-game Robert does not seem.. overly upset about his father's death beyond the expected "He killed my dad, I'm supposed to be upset about that" interactions.. yeah)

ANYWAY blah blah, Chase comes in. Astral sees Chase and is about to lay into him to, for whatever reason- I'm sure Astral would find some, and Chase just throws the most incredible haymaker right in his mouth. Just decks him sideways, knocks him right on his ass.

Would love it, would sell a kidney for it

[leonkennedysprostate]

genuinely though invisigal doesn't deserve robert's forgiveness. she blew him up, she betrayed him and the entire z-team multiple times, she punched him in the face, she put robert, the z-team in danger and chase to near death, she double crossed him and sdn, and THEN she also takes away robert's chance at closure. i think she doesn't even bring robert a lamp

[im-only-39-fuckers]