#dysfunctional person

[the-healing-mindset]

[the-healing-mindset]

You're allowed to recognize and to call out dysfunction when you see it.

No, this does not mean that you go around observing or examining everything or everyone for their patterns and badgering them for it. But it does mean that if there is someone in your personal life who is continously bringing issues and causing chaos, you have the right to point out to them what they're doing and how it affects your ability to connect with them.

Doing this in a gentle manner allows you to show them that you care and that you want to assist them in showing up better for you both.

Now, if you continuously are bringining things to their attention and you notice that they are constantly defensive, constantly wanting to minimize or explain away their behavior instead of pausing to reflect, then that's a pattern worth noting. If they try getting better with it, then it may be fine to allow them some grace to continue working on it.

However, if they continue with the minimization, defensiveness, and varying explanations, then understand that this is who they are as a person. This is something that will not change unless they desire that change to take place. You cannot affect any change on this from the outside. This may be sad, but it is the truth.

You don't have to accept this in the meantime, however. If they grew up in a culture of struggle love, whether familial, platonic, or romantic, then they will be accustomed to their excuses buying them endless chances. To them, the chaos is normal and fighting through anything like this, no matter how unhealthy, is indicative of a strong bond.

[eternusangelus-blog]

It took me several times to properly flip someone off today.

How does that even happen?

Something's wrong with me.