sharing a bit of my new book, Dragon's Teeth! if you like what you read here, you can grab a copy of the book on Kobo, Google Play, Amazon or my Ko-fi shop!
The floating dummy hovered midway down the garden, its button eyes staring in a way that made Enkarini a little nervous. “What do I do?” She looked sideways to Ustin, hoping for some clear instructions.
“I just want to see how you naturally use your ability. Do whatever feels right to you, and we’ll go from there.”
She took a deep breath, looked back at the dummy and tried to remember what she’d been taught so far. She hadn’t used her magic since the dragon attacks back home, and something within her seemed to be holding back. As hard as she tried, she couldn’t forget the feeling of being taken over, when the dark cloud she’d always thought of as protective had pulled itself into her, building on itself to become something overwhelming, powerful enough to defeat three rampaging dragons and totally out of her control. She missed being able to just call it up, mess with it a little, maybe make different shapes with it, and let it fade. Maybe if she just relaxed and thought about how fun it had been when she first started learning, she could use it without losing control again.
She let out her breath slowly, called up her cloud and tried to make it into a ball shape, which she intended to bounce off the dummy’s head. The ball formed just fine, but as she sent it away from herself the shape began to flicker slightly. Panic crept in, and she tightened her grip on the shadow ball. She felt it strain against the binds she was trying to put on it, and it exploded into a mass of writhing tendrils that rapidly spread across the garden. She yelped, desperately trying to bring it back under control, but the harder she tried to hold onto it the more it wriggled away.
“Calm down!” Ustin barked. She turned towards him, to see him standing firmly, arms outstretched and gently gathering in the stray wisps of shadow. “Panicking will only make this worse. I’ve got it, you need to let go and calm yourself.”
With a considerable effort, Enkarini released all the magic she had pulled up and tried to settle herself down. As her breathing and heartbeat slowly returned to normal, she watched Ustin rein in her uncontrolled burst with efficient skill. When all the extended bits were gathered back into a rough ball shape, he lowered it to the ground and gradually allowed it to dissipate into faint wisps of smoke, which blew away in the wind. “Sorry,” she said in a very small voice.
Ustin looked at her, his head slightly tilted. “You had much better control before, when you first opened the gateway. Something happened that made you a little uneasy, uncomfortable with using your magic.”
Before she knew it, the entire story poured out of her; how her home town Tewen had been attacked during the midsummer festival and how she’d got lost in the mayhem; her desperate call to Maldor for help, trying to find her father; finally managing to reach him only to see him die saving her; how her magic had reacted and spiralled out of her control, leaving her exhausted, confused and unsure how much of the damage her own outburst had caused. Even the confrontation with Aila and her mob in the aftermath, and the accusations of using dark magic that had been thrown at her by the superstitious over the last couple of years.
There were a few moments of silence before Ustin spoke again. “I can see how that would unsettle you. That inner turmoil is likely affecting your magic, too.” He led her back towards the house and sat her down in one of the weathered garden chairs on the back porch. “Shadow magic is closely connected to the wielder’s spirit, more so than most other types. It means any emotional disturbance will have some impact on your casting. It also means that your magic will reject any use outside of your own nature – the fact that you’re so concerned about being evil tells me you have a kind heart, and the shadow magic will pick up on that. It won’t allow you to use it for cruel or harmful things, because those things aren’t in your nature.”
She drank in the reassuring words, longing to believe them and let go of her fears and doubts, but years of sermons and temple-influenced gossip stood in her way. She’d always been told that magic was good when it came from intense focus, concentration and effort, but her dark, uncontrollable bursts were something else, something wild and dangerous. She had to make it obey her, otherwise someone might get hurt. She still wasn’t entirely convinced that her father’s death hadn’t been her fault, and would never be able to forgive herself if one of her friends was caught up in another violent eruption of shadow magic.
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