#homeshool

[muushbi]

Starting work early today💐

[ruminate88]

School Trauma: The Cost of Forced Dependence 🎒

Third grade was when my struggles in school really progressed. I was falling behind so much that the teacher made me sit on the wall every day during recess to finish my schoolwork. I wasn’t getting to play at all.

My mom would actually visit me from work and sit with me against the wall so I wasn't alone, trying to help me catch up. She complained to the school that never having recess wasn't fair, but they argued I was too far behind. At this point, the meetings about me began.

The Labeling and Programming

I was labeled with a learning disability and ADHD. They even suggested I go back to second grade. Though my dad was defensive and wanted me pushed forward, my mom gave me the choice, and I chose to go back to second grade.

That's when they put me in the special education room. The teachers told us we were only auditory learners and weren't allowed to read tests or start any work by ourselves—the teachers had to read it to us. This is where I started to feel completely incapable of doing things for myself. You become reliant on the adults.

I carried that reliance mindset for a long time. It frustrated my mom that I wouldn’t do things independently, and she spent middle school trying to break that programming.

The Choice for Independence

Homeschooling was my choice, too, even though my dad was strongly against it, believing I should be in traditional school like everyone else. I chose it because I knew I had to become self-reliant.

It was difficult because it was so isolating; you’re by yourself all day long. But it worked. I’ve been independent ever since. The problem now is that when you’ve only relied on yourself for so long, it becomes incredibly hard to ask for help.

This journey has been about undoing that early programming. ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

11-18-25 at 12:01 p.m.

[ruminate88]

The Life I Gave Up 💔

I was 15 when we moved in with my grandmother, who had dementia. I would be home with her all day because I was homeschooled and my parents had to work. At some point, my parents went ahead and bought my grandma’s house in case something were to happen to her. One of my mom's older brothers was put in power over my grandma's money, which didn't make sense to me because we were the ones living with her, and I was actually taking care of her.

I felt at times my uncle could be a little selfish in holding onto her money, which put my parents having to pay for a lot. My grandma lived to be 92 years old, and at some point, her dementia got really bad, and I had to be with her almost 24/7. I basically had no life of my own. My parents had a life of their own, and unfortunately, I was the one that had to give up my life for Grandma.

I never got to really be a teenager, and yet I loved my family, so I wasn't angry, but there were times when it all felt unfair. My parents were dependent on me because they were basically just trying to survive and work. There were two incidents where they didn't make enough money, and I had to step up and pay the bills. I know that was hard for my mom to ask me when I was already doing so much, but what choice did I have?

I was also helping to raise my brother's kids during this time. My brother was also extremely dependent on me, and I just had so much responsibility at a young age. School was on the back burner, and my entire life was devoted to my grandmother and my brother's kids. At some point, my grandmother became quite the burden, and I felt terrible feeling that way, but I couldn't go anywhere or do anything, and I was extremely miserable.

I made friends with a group of girls in real life who were nannies from Brazil. They often got the weekends off and would always invite me to go do stuff or have sleep overs. They were the only friends I had, and I would ask my mom to go, and she would often have to tell me no because she needed me to stay home. I would get really upset because I felt like everyone had a life but me. I began to feel extremely invisible and lonely.

Even though I was with my grandmother all day, she had no conversation. I believe she had childhood trauma because of how dissociated she was. She never wanted to talk about her childhood and mostly just wanted to watch the news or sit in her rocking chair and look out the window. It made it awkward, and the house was extremely quiet. My brother's kids were also there during the day, but they were little and often playing outside, leaving me with no one to talk to.

That is precisely the reason why I was constantly seeking out online messengers. I had walls up, too, and was always bracing myself for criticism. I was always ashamed of my life because I was home all day. I felt sheltered, and like there was a whole world out there that I knew nothing about. I wanted to experience it, but I was scared of getting hurt. And yet, most of my online relationships were abusive, so I was getting hurt regardless.

My intentions were pure, but my childhood wounds caused me to constantly find myself in toxic relationships. There was one relationship I had with a guy that I didn't even want to be his girlfriend, but we were always arguing, blocking, and then unblocking each other and making up again. We were in and out of each other's lives for four or five years. He was extremely controlling, and yet I couldn't seem to stay away from him. I was attracted to the danger. Many nights, we fell asleep over the phone together. In reality, I just had low self-worth and I didn't love myself, so I was accepting the mistreatment. Whenever I would let him back in, he would take that opportunity to be super critical and act as if he couldn't believe that I kept letting him back in. I did not understand why I kept doing that. The last time I blocked his number, was the first time I understood that I can never trust him.

09-23-25 at 1:24 pm

[ruminate88]

People who were protected growing up build faster, and those of us who had to build ourselves, build slower but deeper ❤️‍🩹

The fact my brother was almost 10 years older than me and was like another dad to me. I slept in his room becuase my parents wouldn’t let me sleep in their bed and I was too scared to sleep alone hehe

Anyway, my bro moved out and got married at 19 to a woman he got pregnant. She already had a baby by someone else. He grew up so fast and then needed help because he automatically had two kids. He ended up with 4 kids, and I helped to raise them all! 🙏🏻 was my GREATEST blessing!!

I was labeled in school and never felt smart, but by 14, I dropped out of school to be ‘homeschooled,’ but my parents both worked!! It’s not like they had time to really help me, and my mom sorta handed me a book and told me to ‘get started,’ and basically, I became my own teacher.

I taught myself everything, even how to have sex…. So when I say I built myself, I mean…. For someone who was labeled in school and made to feel ‘incapable’, and so I was teaching myself how to build websites, and my mom would always tell me how I’m already proving teachers wrong about me, but listen… once you’re labeled, you fight that so hard core!!

One of the first things my mom told me once I became homeschooled is, ‘You do not have a learning disability. You’re going to rise above that.’ It’s not like I didn’t fight and try so hard, but that label chased me into adulthood and into all of my toxic relationships with men. 😢

Of course, I dated almost all younger men… my recent ex was 7 years younger than me!! It’s just… I also was the family caregiver and didn’t really get to be a teenager. I feel like I was just chasing those lost years in these younger men. Wanting to be a kid again, but yet I’m everybody’s mother everywhere I go. Raising everyone! I always joke that my brother raised me the first 10 years, and then I finished raising him the next 15-20 lol AND my brother laughs and doesn’t ever deny it.

I had good parents, who were extremely giving to me, just they both worked so hard all the time. My mom did so much for so many people, and my dad gave tough love and was overly opinionated my whole life. Every idea my brother or I had, my dad would shoot it down with realism and toughened me up to be a realist when I used to be a big dreamer, but I guess he didn’t want me to live in a fantasy all the time.

7/08/25

[ruminate88]

What People Think Homeschool is Like and What it Was Like For me:

2/28/25 It was my choice ❤️‍🩹

When a lot of people think of homeschool, they think of a bunch of kids like the Duggars from Counting On. They think of all these kids being forced into a religion and forced to wear matching clothes… 😳😝 sad… but I know it does happen in some places.

For me, I only have 1 older bro who is more like a dad cuz he’s 9 and a half years older than me lol School labeled me and made me the outcast. School was absolute hell for me!!! I hated going there and would cry every time I had to go. The kids made fun of my best friend Lori and so I had to stand up for her all the time but then I was teased too because of it… by Middle school, I stopped defending Lori and told her to fight her own battles. (She wouldn’t) I had a cold look on the world. I thought the adults/teachers and the kids were all mean and hateful. YET I did grow up in church too where everyone there is so loving and gentle with me. So I was in between two realities. No one in my family or at church treated me like I had this disability but yet school did. School made me feel I could do nothing for myself!!!

In the 7th grade, I stopped caring. I did not trust any of my teachers or what they were teaching me. I was super defensive and stubborn! Very strong willed too. So I abandoned doing any homework and started taking F’s and 0’s daily. So eventually the teacher’s aid from my IEP class, started giving me all the answers and telling me if I didn’t copy the answers fast, I would fail the 7th grade… I was headed down a bad road where I DID NOT care about my life.

My mom found out I was cheating and she was soooo angry. She had a meeting with the school and they said, “There just isn’t enough help and your daughter isn’t a problem child, so we aren’t worried about her.” That’s when my mom told the school she wouldn’t let me come back there. Yet she asked me what I actually wanted to do and OF COURSE I said I wanted to be homeschooled. Yay!! I was FREEEEE!!!! Oh man, I partied so hard on the last day of school lol 😂 (I shouldn’t have passed the 7th grade tho. I cheated my way through.)

Okay but school had been doing everything for me hah so one of the first days of homeschool, my mom hands me a book and says, “Okay get started” 😳😳😳 and I just sit there staring at her and she goes “What?? Why are you just sitting there??” 😝😂 and I was like “well, are you going to read this to me???” Wow my mom was frustrated and says, “YOU KNOW HOW TO READ!!!” So she opened the book for me, folded the page in half and says, “read the first side for me” and when I did, my mom says, “okay!!! See? You can do this. You do not have a learning disability!!!!” Wow…. I tried. I tried to teach myself. Then I realized the answers were in the back of the book 😜😜😜 Soooo, when my mom would leave for work, I would copy the answers cuz that’s what I had been doing in school lol. My mom would get so upset at me YET she understood school had trained me to cheat. (Nothing she could do about it but keep persuading me that cheating won’t help me)

Also now that I’m home, all the family knows it and too quickly my aunts are calling me up to come babysit or stay at their houses. I did more traveling around than I did homeschool haha A year later we moved in with my grandma who had dementia and now I’m helping take care of her too while still going to help babysit for family. Eventually my brother wants me to babysit for him too so now I’m a full time family caretaker. No school work hardly…..

So for me, I was busy watching kids all over and helping my grandma. There wasn’t much homeschool at all. It was NOT for religious reasons either, I was struggling in school and I was miserable. I was more free to be myself once I got out of school YET I still struggled within my confidence/mental health. By being home all the time, you get isolated from the world. My only way to make friends was over the internet. I began to live a fantasy life where I have all these friendships and connections with people I never even met from all over the world too!!!! They don’t last though because eventually you just grow up and move on….. sad. ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹 all of my romantic connections were from the internet too and I was in a lot of toxic relationships. I’m still healing from those men years later.

Homeschool was never actually about homeschool for me. Years I didn’t hardly pick up a single book cuz I was busy taking care of people… I did try to get my GED when I was turning 18 and took night classes but it was too hard 😝 so I gave up till a year later I went back with my 1st bf Stewart and we worked together and he actually helped me with my math!!! So I was able to graduate and all my aunts came to the ceremony they were soo proud of me but I didn’t feel proud or accomplished because I’m very analytic, critical and hard on myself. I often hold myself to unrealistic expectations and standards. Idk why 🤷🏻‍♀️

[homeschoolsblog]

The Importance of Early Childhood Education

Early childhood education (ECE) is a critical foundation for a child's cognitive, social, and emotional development. It sets the stage for lifelong learning, resilience, and success. This blog explores the significance of early education, its benefits, and the role of parents and educators in fostering young minds with home schooling.

The Foundation for Future Success

How ECE Shapes Cognitive Development

Children's brains develop rapidly during their early years, making this period essential for building foundational cognitive skills. Early childhood education programs introduce concepts like problem-solving, critical thinking, and creativity, which serve as cornerstones for academic achievement.

Social and Emotional Growth

Through structured activities and interactions, children in early education learn to navigate social settings, manage emotions, and build relationships. These skills are crucial for fostering self-confidence and empathy, which play a significant role in later success.

The Benefits of Early Childhood Education

Language and Communication Skills

One of the primary benefits of ECE is the enhancement of language and communication abilities. Programs encourage children to express themselves through storytelling, conversations, and play, leading to improved vocabulary and comprehension.

Academic Preparedness

High-quality early education equips children with readiness for formal schooling. Studies show that children who attend ECE programs perform better in reading, writing, and math during their primary school years.

Social Competence

ECE fosters teamwork, cooperation, and conflict resolution. These social skills are integral to both academic and personal growth.

Long-Term Advantages

The benefits of early childhood education extend well beyond childhood. Research links ECE to higher rates of graduation, better career opportunities, and improved socioeconomic status in adulthood.

The Role of Play in Early Childhood Education

Learning Through Play

Play-based learning is a cornerstone of effective early childhood education. Activities like building blocks, role-playing, and art projects allow children to explore concepts in a hands-on, engaging manner.

Enhancing Creativity and Problem-Solving

Through imaginative play, children develop creativity and learn to solve problems independently. These skills are foundational for innovation and adaptability.

The Teacher's Role in Early Childhood Education

Qualified and Caring Educators

Teachers in ECE are not merely instructors; they are facilitators of growth. Their ability to create nurturing and stimulating environments is crucial for fostering curiosity and a love for learning.

Individualized Attention

In small classroom settings, educators can tailor their approaches to meet the unique needs of each child, ensuring that no one is left behind.

The Role of Parents in Early Childhood Education

Active Participation

Parents play a pivotal role in supporting early learning. Activities such as reading bedtime stories, engaging in educational games, and fostering curiosity at home complement formal education.

Building a Strong Partnership

Collaboration between parents and educators creates a consistent learning environment, reinforcing the skills and values taught in ECE programs.

Social-Emotional Learning in ECE

Developing Emotional Intelligence

Early childhood education emphasizes the importance of understanding and managing emotions. Activities designed for social-emotional learning help children build resilience and cope with challenges.

Peer Interaction

Engaging with peers in an educational setting allows children to practice empathy, share experiences, and build friendships.

Challenges in Early Childhood Education

Accessibility and Affordability

Despite its importance, ECE remains inaccessible for many families due to financial and logistical barriers. Addressing these challenges is essential for creating equitable opportunities.

Maintaining Quality Standards

Ensuring that ECE programs adhere to high standards of curriculum and teacher qualifications is critical for delivering effective outcomes.

Conclusion

Early childhood education is a vital investment in a child's future. By fostering cognitive, social, and emotional development, ECE lays the groundwork for academic success and personal growth. The combined efforts of educators, parents, and policymakers are necessary to ensure that every child has access to high-quality early education with Shajar School. Prioritizing ECE not only benefits individuals but also strengthens communities and society as a whole.

[wolfisakionwheels]

Days 6-7 | Beach Boondocking | Crescent City CA

There’s a certain amount of risk involved when Boondocking (dispersed/wild camping) that usually falls along the lines of getting a knock on your door in the middle of the night asking you to move along, or those illustrious tweakers trying to scope your stuff. We always err on the side of caution because we have these little boys to look after, but also because we are giant wusses and I run from confrontation like it’s the plague.

We can spend countless hours pouring over apps and blogs, getting to know our public lands, trying to get our piece of that sweet boondocking pie, but the best spots, we’ve discovered, are usually found by word of mouth. And when it pays off, it usually pays off big time. As in, waking up to the Pacific Ocean crashing right outside your window, snuggled deep into your warm cozy bed, pinned under several more little limbs than you remember falling asleep with.

Shannon’s neighbor back in Ashland generously shared his secret spot with us (an honor to be held in the highest regard) and, just like that, when we thought we would start heading up the coastline towards Brookings, we found ourselves suddenly high-tailing it to California.

9.5.2020

[wolfisakionwheels]

Summer School

Oscar: Wait, so we're homeschooling ALL SUMMER LONG?

Me: Yeah... Probably?

Oscar: But all of my friends are off for the summer!

Me: Well all your friends probably don't have teachers who need to pull the Mac n' Cheese box out of the trash three times to reread the instructions.

6.19.19