Genre: hoseok x reader, established relationship au, married au, domestic au, husband hoseok, dad hoseok, angst, ends in fluff, slice of life au, oc son and daughter
Word Count: 2.2k
Summary: When you fell in love with Hoseok, you knew he was the man you’d spend the rest of your life with, even if it meant leaving your home country to live with him in Korea. But when the homesickness starts to settle in again and you decide to pay your country a visit, your husband doesn’t really take your absence as well as he lets on, and your daughter knows it.
A/N: Hi! I was on such a steady roll for a while that it feels like this is my first time uploading in ages even though it’s only been about a week I think. Finally finished my exams last week so moving home and out of my apartment for the summer has changed up my schedule. Anyway, just to note, you and Hoseok have been together for years before this so of course you’ve been to your home country now and again despite living in Korea with him. It’s not like you just completely up and ditched your family, lol. But remember that for the majority of your dating years, Hoseok was busy on tour and in the studio. I imagine you’d visit home a few times but Hoseok wasn’t able to accompany you for most of it, being as busy at he was. He mostly connected with your family through phone calls and texts. Once you got married and he slowed down his career, he could visit your family alongside you more often, but this is his first time being present (not on tour/busy) when you visit home on your own, hence his unfamiliarity with you being away from him in this au. Hopefully, that provides some context. If anyone’s interested, I’d love to do an au on how you and Hoseok met/what life was like when you were dating/in college and living through his superstar days. As always, please let me know if you enjoy! Thank you for reading. :)
...
Fresh-picked flowers lined the kitchen as per usual, in vases on counters, as centerpieces on tables, and on the floor in tall marble pots. One of your many candles rested above the living room's coffee table, filling the air with a calming scent. All throughout the home's bottom floor, floor-to-ceiling windows rest uncovered, allowing the gentle rays of the sun to light the space naturally.
Nothing was out of place in the beautiful dwelling you got to call home. Except for the smile on your husband's face.
Your home has grown familiar with Hoseok's sighs ever since you rolled your suitcase out the door the day before. It was usually Hoseok who was out and about, flying across the world, and moving from one place to the other. In the mornings, when he woke up, you were next to him with your smiling face. In the evenings, when he came home, you were there to greet him with a hug and kiss. And on the days where he was able to spend afternoons at home, you were more than willing to spend it cuddled up in your abode with him.
Since his debut, you'd been the one constantly waiting on him. Late nights on the couch, fighting to stay awake to see him come home. Or late nights beside him in the studio, yawning as you listened to track after track because Hoseok wasn't ready to give up. Or afternoons you spent lounging in bed, already missing the man who'd once again had to run off to dance practice after dance practice. Not to forget, all the months you'd spent wishing he'd finally walk through the door, knowing he was on stage across the world.
Hoseok wasn't used to things being the other way around. In his world that moved so fast, you were one of the only constants in his life. Every time he looked for you, you were just about always there. Maybe had he still been in his younger years, running in between studios and practice rooms and tour buses and photoshoots, he wouldn't have felt your absence as much. But now that the two of you had finally settled down, bought a home, and started your family, the newfound slowness to his life meant he was spoiled with time to spend with you. Hoseok had almost forgotten what it was like to be away from you for more than a couple of hours.
Which is why, now, with you deciding to return to your home country for some time, everything in your perfect home suddenly felt so out of place for your gloomy husband.
His shoulders hung as he swung open the refrigerator door, grabbing a cold bottle of lemonade from inside. He took a swig before making his way up the stairs and to the office, deciding to work on some lyrics to pass the time. He twirls a pen between his fingers, leaning back in his seat as he stares at the ceiling. He doesn't remember being so dejected about your departure when you'd left. In fact, anyone looking in from the outside would see that he was encouraging you to go. He knew how homesick you'd been for the past month. Your playlist of songs that reminded you of home seemed to frequent your search history more than others and you were unknowingly talking about your family more than usual. While Hoseok of course loved having you with him, he always felt slightly guilty that you'd basically uprooted your entire life when you decided to stay with him in Korea, especially knowing that it meant you'd be apart from your parents and siblings. Being as close as he was to his, he couldn't imagine how it must feel.
So he smiled as you threw your duffle bag over your shoulder and grabbed the handle to your suitcase. It wasn't until the door shut behind you that he realized he may have been slightly faking it all along.
You huffed, finally allowing yourself to believe you hadn't forgotten anything, as you scanned your bags one last time. Hoseok walks up to stand before you, followed by your two little duckling-like children. "Just go!" Hoseok laughs as Sage and Hui plop down at his feet. "You've checked your bags like five times now. And yes, I've been counting." You groan, laughing at yourself as well when you realize how silly you're being. "I just want to make sure I have everything!" Deep down, you know that maybe you're actually just not ready to leave the three of them yet.
You give up on checking your bags, knowing Hoseok will scold you if you open up another one to sift through. But as always, your brain runs a mile a minute and you're quick to find something else to busy your brain that stops you from leaving the house once again. "There's still salad in the fridge! Make sure to use it up before it goes bad okay?" you remind your husband to which he nods. "Okay, and um... Oh! I did laundry last night but it's still in the dryer so remember to bring it out please." Hoseok nods again as a smile creeps onto his face. He already knows this is just the start of a ramble session he'd have to cut you off from, lest you miss your flight. You did this every time the two of you were about to part for an extended period of time. "Okay, and what else?.. Oh, formula's in the cabinet, diapers are in the closet-" "Yes, yes, I have also been feeding and changing diapers for the past four years," Hoseok says, pointing to the two toddlers curled around his legs. You mentally smack yourself. "Right, right.." you huff, unable to think of anything more to add to your procrastination.
"You're going to miss your flight," your husband warns, pulling you into a last goodbye hug. You sigh wrapping your arms around him. "I know," you whine sadly. "I'll see you when I get back." "Mhm, bye baby," he says. "Even though we already said goodbye ten minutes ago," he snarkily adds and you laugh at your failed previous attempt to leave each other.
"Bye, mommy!" Your two-year-old, Hui, calls from his spot on the floor. "Bye sweetie!" you grin, leaning down to reach his eye level. "Are you sure you guys will be okay?" you pout at your husband. "Of course we will!" He cheers, reaching down to scoop the boy into his arms. "We're going to have so much fun, aren't we, son?" Hoseok reaches up to tickle his stomach, causing an eruption of laughter. "See?" Hoseok smiles at you, watching as the worry falls from your shoulders.
His pen clattering against the table as it slips from his fingers wakes Hoseok from his thoughts. His feigned coolness about your solo vacation was likely also to do with the two of you's kids, asleep a few rooms down. If there was anyone who should have such an adverse reaction to your leaving, it should be the toddlers. Hoseok knew the best way to keep them from trying to dissuade you with tantrums and tears was to be positive himself. And as hoped, his desire for you to fill the growing hole in your heart rubbed off on your children. Sage and Hui's combined maturity and big heart despite their young age helped them to understand the situation. Hoseok smiled at the thought of his smart kids. They were being raised well.
The rest of the day without you after you'd left had gone rather smoothly. Hoseok spent it having playtime, cooking dinner, and watching movies with the two as night fell. It wasn't until he'd stepped into his empty bed and felt the quiet chill of the house that the longing feeling began to sink in. And waking up to the empty bed once again was no better. Sage and Hui were his only distractions, but now, with the two of them tucked into bed for their regular afternoon naps, he found himself thinking of you once more.
Usually, the kids' nap times were you and Hoseok's holy grails. The two of you would synchronously plop onto the couch with a sigh after finally getting them down. It was one of the only chances the two of you had for alone time. Hoseok finds it funny that he's now wishing the kids would wake up sooner.
"Focus, Hoseok," he mutters to himself, directing back to the journal in front of him. He's finally able to start scribbling down some ideas when a small voice perks up beside him.
"Daddy?"
Hoseok nearly jumps from his chair, clutching his chest to stop the shriek that threatens to leave him as he looks down at the small body that's crept next to him. "Sage, sweetie, you scared me," he gulps. "Sorry!" she shrieks. He chuckles. "It's okay. You're up already?" he asks with a ruffle to her hair. The little girl furrows her brows up at him. "It's been an hour," she says, pointing to the clock above his desk. Hoseok looks up to see the time. Sure enough, she's correct. "Oh, I guess it has," he laughs. There's no one more punctual than a kid who hates nap time.
"But Hui is still sleeping," she adds. Hoseok lifts beneath her arms and sits her on his lap. "That's okay. We'll let him sleep for a bit more then," he says, kissing her cheek. Sage nods before twisting in his lap to face him. She stares up at him intently without saying anything, and Hoseok quirks an eyebrow at her. "What is it?" he asks.
"You've been sad since mommy left," she pouts.
Hoseok stares down at the little girl, wondering when she was able to draw that conclusion in between his happy smiles and giggles. He can't help but notice that she stares at him with the same studious expression that you often wear when you know something is wrong. He was never able to fake his emotions around you, which is why you were one of the few people he could be honest with. It seems as though your ability to understand him has been passed down to his little one as well.
She lifts the pen from his fingers and reaches down to his journal, scribbling down an image that he can only guess might be a bunny.
"When me and Hui miss you, mommy tells us to draw you a picture!" she smiles, scribbling away happily. Her cute voice warms Hoseok's heart. When she passes the pen back to him, two bunnies are doodled upon a bed of grass under a smiling sun in the corner. Sage looks up to smile cutely at him and all he can do is pull her into his chest and hug her tight.
He thought to all the pages of drawings he'd collected over the years that lay safely in his studio where he could look at them when he, too, missed his little babies. "You should try drawing a picture for mommy," Sage suggests with her soft voice. "It might make you feel better."
Hoseok smiles. "Yeah, I agree."
He brings the pen to the paper once again, adding two more bunnies, larger than the first two, and some flowers growing behind them. "That looks really good, daddy!" Sage encourages, clapping her hands together. "Mommy will love it!"
He laughs. "Thank you, baby," he lands another sweet kiss to the crown of her head. "But you're so good at this, I think your drawings might be a bit better than mine," he adds. She giggles making him smile wider. "Help me out?" he asks, passing the pen back to her. She nods happily, adding more doodles around the page before passing it back to Hoseok who does the same. The two continue on like that for quite a while, the room filling with laughter, smiles, and the sound of the pen dragging against the paper. In the midst of their doodle fiasco, Hoseok's phone rings, the screen lighting up with your image, signaling a video call from you.
"It's mommy!" Sage squeals, leaping forward to grab the phone and accept your call.
"Hi, guys!" you smile, happy to see two of the faces you've already missed so much. "I just landed in the airport. How are you, my loves?" "We're good, mommy!" Sage is quick to answer, too excited to see you. She lifts the page that she and Hoseok have been working on until it fills the camera. "Look, daddy and I drew you a picture!" You coo happily, the sight bringing a happy pout to your face. "Did you now?" Hoseok grins at your reaction. "Yes, we did," he says.
"It's beautiful you guys, wow. Thank you so much!" you beam. "I can't wait to see it up close when I get back."
"Me too," Sage responds with a jut of her bottom lip. "We miss you." "So much," Hoseok agrees. "I miss you all, too," you sympathize, adding with a reassuring smile, "But I'll be back soon!" Hoseok nods, giving a squeeze to the girl on his lap. You smile seeing the affection. "I love you guys."
"We love you too, mommy."
...
masterlist
A/N: Last note! I don’t know if anyone’s interested enough in these stories to do this lol, but if so I would like to open up a drabble or request list maybe. It could give me more ideas to write. Or also provide clarity for any parts of the storyline that might be confusing? I try to keep the storyline as concise as possible but with so many ideas in my head, I might jumble things up or forget to give context that readers might need and I haven’t provided yet. But, I don’t know! Just an idea :) If there's anyone who'd like to, just feel free to send them in!
↳ pairing namjoon, you
↳ genre melodrama, angst, established relationship
↳ words 4.5k
↳ summary a short fluff of with a dash of needed angst for those who missed my namjoon
↳ warning strong languages, implied infidelity, suggestive content
↳ song forrest blakk ‘if you love her’, forrest blakk ‘fall into me’
↳ chapters one-shot
“But did you really have to say it that way…?” silence, “You know the boy is tender, respects everything you do— follows you everywhere,” more silence, “Sometimes you make poor choices of words.”
Namjoon tuts his tongue and bellows, “He was out all night after a concert when he could have prepared for whatever it is he feels like saying today,” Namjoon scoops the protein powder into his tumbler, “Priorities.”
“Really?” you switched to face him, “You’re really going to reprimand him for having fun? He’s just 24.”
“I was 24 too,” Namjoon snapped, shaking the tumbler containing the protein shakes vigorously, fire in his eyes, “I didn’t receive the same treatment because we were just getting started, I have not rested a day after I made my debut. It was because of me he was able to go to that concert.”
“Okay here’s not what we’re going to do, penned the same fate on others. There is some truth to that, but you need to understand that Jungkook works hard too. Maybe not as hard as you do, constantly, but he didn’t need the gatekeeping. He slipped up, it's not like you never did?” You soften your voice, coaxing him. But you know better than to touch him right now. You are both leaning against the kitchen counter, facing each other. Namjoon downs the last gulp of protein shakes while glaring at the wall behind you. He lunges beside you to set his tumbler into the sink and leave it there, unwashed.
That is him protesting. That is him not agreeing to what you say. That is him, angry.
“I’m going to the gym,” he passed, as he walked down the hall, pulling his shirt off his head. You stared into his speckles back, his spine line in between his shoulder blades as it moves further and further from you, getting smaller and smaller in view.
“But you just got home,” you muttered, glancing at your feet and your painted toenails. They are sage green, his favourite color.
Namjoon walks past your charging phone on the floor and it was vibrating a call coming through. Jungkook was calling your cell. Jungkook rarely calls anyone so he knew it has something to do with his altercation with him earlier today. Namjoon decided to be petty and watch it ring as he undresses. He can’t decide if the fact you were siding with Jungkook that made him mad or the fact that Jungkook came to confide in you when it comes to issues dealing with him. And he has the ego of a tyrant when it comes to things like responsibility and he can’t be told he was wrong even if he is. Anyone who had done so, would have seen the ugly part of him and left. Not you, though.
If anyone could get some sense into him, it would be you.
He grabs his gym bag and sling the strap over his shoulder. He glances at you washing his protein shake tumbler and shoots, “I’m off, be home late, don’t wait.”
You chewed your cheeks and kept your attention on the water washing over your knuckles from the tap, “Right, love you.” Front door slams shut. You tutted your tongue and rolled your eyes to the side before throwing his tumbler into the drawer. Not your first drill, but it was annoying to fight with your spouse especially when it comes to petty things like this. He needed to be told he was being rude and there is no kind way to say them without him taking it to heart like this. Sure it’s not only his fault, Jungkook had his fair share of the catastrophe, earning him the diss from Namjoon for his lack of preparation.
Seeing the 2 missed calls from Jungkook, you placed your hands on your hip. Classic Namjoon.
“Hey,” you greeted Jungkook as he answered your video call. He has his Samsung Z Flip seated on the table while he keeps himself busy, gaming. Mouth gaped open, wide-eyed, the rest of the room in neon red lighting.
“Hey noona,” Jungkook mumbled, “Hyung left?”
“To the gym, won’t tell when he will come home, told me not to wait,” you shuffled in your seat on the bed, propping your elbow up to balance your head, “He was big mad about it.”
“Oh yeah?” Jungkook sneered, a hint of a naughty smile itching to come fully, “Hyung’s cute when he’s mad…”
“Not very when he lives in the same house, sleeps in the same bed… got me walking on tiptoes and shit,” you drew meaningless circles on the bed sheet, noticing a brown stain you don’t quite recognise.
“He will never truly get mad at you, you know that. He’s sulking. Like the big baby he is,” Jungkook spoke in trance as he killed another enemy online.
“The centre of the problem here, I deciphered, is from you. You’re the source of this stress, he told me you went out to a concert all night and didn’t bother to practice your speech, what’s up with that?” you turned the focus to him to which he pouts— the way he pouts when he devoured good food.
“What was I supposed to do? Tell the artist to move the concert on another date? So the speech happens to be a day after the concert and I’m swamped, so?” Jungkook spoke in one breath with a rebellious tone.
“Namjoon’s just being unreasonable as always,” he added before stabbing the keyboard with his finger, missing a kill.
“You Virgos driving me insane, I should have not taken a side on any of this, this is not even my shit to deal with, and you seem to be more interested in your games rather than talking to me, you know what, this call was a mistake—”
“ — Hey, hey hey. Alright, I’m pausing the game,” he grabs his phone in a hurry, swinging in his chair and spinning around, “I just want to talk shit about him,” he chuckles deeply and he squinted at the first sign of light outside his door as he stepped out his mancave.
“You called the wrong number because I don’t talk shit about my husband,” you massage your temples with one hand, “So stubborn, and for what?” Your palm held upward. Jungkook could hear your frustrations, “I don’t even know if he’s gonna come home tonight and I’m scared to text him because he might leave me on read and it makes me want to pack my bags and go home to my parents, when he does it.”
Jungkook stares widely and judgmentally at the camera when you said so, “You married people are so… dramatic.”
“It’s hard not to be,” you stared at the walls and glanced to the corner of the room, “I was all-in for this guy.”
“You really thought a small fight like this would make it all end? Do you really have so little faith in him?” Jungkook screwed his eyebrows at you while he took a sip of Kloud draft beer from the fridge.
“Do you really want me to answer that?” you craned your neck and rested the back of your head on the headboard, glancing at him on the side. Jungkook stopped in his tracks and the seriousness of the situation dawned on him.
“He’s been keeping tabs on his ex. Exes,” you hummed, “It’s stupid. Now it seems I tell you too much.”
Jungkook sits on the couch, putting his phone on the arms of the grey sofa— giving you his full attention. His eyes turned sad, his lips gaped open and words string slowly, “I’m sorry… have you spoken to him about it?”
“It’s supposed to be today when we have the day to ourselves, but…” you hummed, signifying that if Jungkook hadn’t had issues, you probably would have spoken about it.
“You should talk to him,” Jungkook darted in a hurry, “Don’t even worry about the shit between me and him, that was on me— I was A-hole,” he leaned back and ran his fingers through his black locks.
“I don’t think so, he’s leaving for LA in a few days, I don’t want this to mount on him like that,” you confessed, “I’m hurt but I can pretend it doesn’t. But he can’t.” You hugged your knees. It’s hard to verbalize the pain out in your full chest. But Jungkook was close to you. Close enough to know what it is in your heart. He had been your best friend though he never truly labelled himself that for whatever reason. Jungkook’s view of the world is innocent— he is reckless and careless, everything Namjoon isn’t.
It’s normal to feel that maybe you should have ended up with Jungkook when things like these happen but truth be told, Namjoon, on our good days, are quite the safety net.
“He has all these people he needs to meet, and I will never forgive myself for burdening him with things he can’t fix right away. You know how quiet he gets when he is overwhelmed,” you shrugged it off with a smile.
“He shouldn’t keep track of his exes, that’s disrespectful,” Jungkook scorned, “It almost doesn’t sound like him. There must be an underlying issue we both aren’t aware of.”
“Okay but why are you trying to fix my marriage,” you squinted at him.
“I felt responsible after the shit I pulled,” Jungkook confessed.
“Promise you’ll take care of him when you all leave for LA?” you pleaded.
“That goes without saying, but if he doesn’t explain himself, consider him dead by my hands,” Jungkook warned, “Listen I have to go, but keep me updated with hyung.”
“Jungkook please keep it on a hush-hush? I trust you’ll keep the secret?”
“Bet.”
The video call ends. Your eyes start brimming. “Fuck,” you cussed. You hate telling others what you’re going through. Always regret opening up to someone no matter who it was. It was admitting that you’re on the rocks and something about that just hurts.
You get nervous. You get so worried when he is away.
If someone ever tells you they never get worried when their significant other is in another continent for a significant amount of time; chances are they were never in love with the person. It frustrates you because you know he is not the type to sway over strangers and he is very naturally quite friendly. Namjoon is charming when he wants to be and he can be very unassuming when a certain individual is interested in him even though it was glaring in bright neon lights. He might not necessarily see what it was about him that was so enthralling to others but good God, you do.
Safe to think that it was natural for you to feel like this; Namjoon is such a beautiful, captivating man with a dazzling smile. It doesn’t mean that you’re worth much less. He himself knew that he too was somewhat lucky to grab your attention, though he was quite already confident that he was going to stir your pot the right way. He sent an in-flight photo of him. Adorable. A little caption that says, “I’ll be home before you know it.” Kiss emoji, kiss emoji, kiss emoji. It’s like a little ritual for you two. Namjoon is all about traditions, almost obsessively so. Every goodbye is simply a ‘see you again’. People like Namjoon never stay long in one place, he would get bored and smothered; so he always has a book in his hands. It was his escape guised in a piece of layered tree pulps. Whenever you see him with a book, you would think to yourself, “Look where he’s wandered off to, today…”
The concentration in his face, the way every bone of his fingers move as he turns the page, his eyes holding the word captive in his wake— Namjoon is tranquility, your personal safety. When he is near, that is. When he is away, you can’t even sit still.
You’re an overthinker, almost obsessively so. With lack of medium to escape from, you would overworked yourself. An unhealthy self-destructing habit you’ve developed since young. Overwork leads to unplanned starvation which then leads to tummy aches that keeps you awake at night. You’ve written stories like this a thousand times, and everytime it feels familiar. Namjoon will always travel and you will always be the one to wait for him. On the opposite of literally every couple you ever knew, you wished he hadn’t left as many memories of himself before he left— because it only makes things harder for you. Namjoon is a considerate lover. Learn your love language at insane speed. Maybe it was easier to learn something so similar to himself.
You sit in the living room, where his easel is erected next to yours. His unfinished work and your own abstract piece standing side by side. You imagined you and him sitting in the same room just painting the day away in silence and how you would have not wanted the day spent any other way. The first few hours of separation is difficult, no matter how many times you try to convince yourself that it’s only going to be a few weeks. It’s been 7 years and nothing has changed. Sometimes he talks so much that you just had to kiss him on the lip in the middle of a sentence to shut him up. Other days, he is the noisiest thing in life that you just want to strangle him. He has zero ability to read the room when you’re around and to this day, you’re still unsure if it was a good thing or a bad thing— perhaps it's both.
Namjoon is raunchy and loud, but he is also calm and collected when needed. Terribly observant. You smiled at a small tent he had erected for you in the bedroom for days you needed space away from him but not wanting to leave the bedroom. You always felt bad when he was affectionate and you don’t feel the same because he had worn you down from all day outside doing extreme activities like wall climbing, hiking and whatnot. This way, you both could be in the same room but not necessarily always together. Namjoon needs time alone too. If there is anything you both shared, it’s the inability to work and play together. Whenever either of you are around each other, it gets really difficult to be professional and serious. Procrastination is a curse.
Namjoon is on a long flight to Los Angeles. He tried his best not to show how frightened he was but he knew his wife would have caught the vibe when he would not turn around to give her one last look. His shoulders felt heavy, burdened by unspoken responsibilities, the prestige he had to carry. He is worried that you’re worried. Maybe a little time apart is good for both of you. He was starting to feel dependent and he had to be most reliable when he was on his own.
Unsettling. This discomfort pooling in his stomach when he left Seoul today. He wished that the whole world would swallow him whole today. No amount of skies would suffice. Jungkook had been avoiding him all the way here. Namjoon is sandwiched between Jungkook and Taehyung and he already knows that he’s going to have his sleep disturbed the whole way there. Namjoon sat there with his jaws locked, mouth clamped, a piece of paper in his lap and a pen to write. No words spurred. He crumples the paper, anguished.
He had been terrible. He had been keeping things from you. It may have been a misstep, a poor choice made on his side— whatever it was, he hadn’t been able to come clean. Figured that even to him, the gesture looked wrong for outsiders. Cornered and weighing on the simpler options, he had helped his exes, financially. Maybe he should have spoken about it before he left but he got touchy, got sensitive with your forthcoming attitude on Jungkook that he decided that he wants to act jealous when it should have been you feeling that way at how he has been behaving. Now he left home, wary of his feelings, afraid that if he did reveal it right now, you won’t be there when he returns.
There he is being selfish again. He rests his head on the headrest after sighing loudly.
“I didn’t mean to lie, I didn’t— “ Namjoon stirred awake as he was woken up by the prodding fingers of Jungkook. Namjoon met the doe-eyed boy towering over his seat, with a blank expression on his face.
“We’ve landed,” Jungkook shot monotonously, he helped the older hyung to carry his bag. Namjoon thanked him. Jungkook waited for him to walk out and while they walked together, Jungkook sighs an apology.
“You’re right,” he began, “I wasn’t being responsible. I’ll do better next time. Noona told me that you got angry at her for siding with me; she wasn’t. She was on the fence. You got angry not just because of that right? You’re angry at yourself for whatever that’s chasing you in your nightmares… You’re magnifying my mistakes so yours could look small,” Jungkook gave him a side-eye and jogged to Taehyung who was a few steps further in the front. Namjoon’s lunges slow down as the words simmer down his throat, the pit of his stomach and settles on the ground he stood on. Was it that obvious?
Maybe I was no longer exciting. No longer serving his entertainment. Maybe he got bored with the stagnancy. The moribund of a ten year-long relationship.
“That’s fine to me really,” you snorted, “He’s not exactly that exciting anyways.” Really? Is that what you tell yourself to believe? You know for sure that the moment his flight touched down the homeland, you would be running to the door forgetting why you were mad at him anyways. Why were you mad at him? Because he was being shady. Because he was contacting his exes and offering financial help just so she could get herself out of the gutter. Because he was nice? To the person he used to love and might have thought of marrying. Was it your place to be mad? Should you be mad? Yes and yes.
“We’ve shared a house, an apartment, shared bodies, thoughts, dreams and desires. Financial goes without saying. What was he thinking? Why was he helping her? Why did she bother? Why didn’t he tell me? Was he thinking that I might be angry? Why keep it a secret?” You were going insane on your own and you know that if you don’t talk to him, you will not get the answers to all these questions you have. Best thing you could do now is to distract yourself with anything not related to Namjoon, maybe get a new hobby, or finish the painting without him, or write your thoughts out on the blog.
Namjoon has your blog on notifications. The new post is lengthy but he’s a quick reader.
His expression turns even more scowled as he drinks in the paragraphs like a thirsty traveller. Mouthing hushed ‘No’s’ and ‘Babe…’ on his own was his own way of being animatic when reading your words. He disagrees with some but reading your entry helps him understand your psyches. It may be late, but he had slept well in the plane and after reading your post, he decided that sleep is for the weak. He needs to fix this and ASAP. How does he come about with it? He already knows you will have trouble sleeping without him— he darts his eyes to the wall clock in the hotel room. He knows that you knew about the financial aids he had given his ex. And the exes before that. And exes before that too. He knows that you were hurt and felt that you’ve been shoved to the side for the act of kindness.
You wrote, and he quoted, “Don’t fall for the nice guys, my mom would say. Because they were so nice, they can’t tell you no, and they can’t tell others no. I was adamant in proving her wrong, but looks like I am. My husband is a nice guy. He’s so nice, he financed his exes. Not helpful that he has the influence to do so too. He didn’t have to keep it a secret if it really was nothing. But he did, so what am I supposed to think of now…?”
He exits the post and goes to his speed dials for you.
“Chances of her not picking it up, 50%. Chances of her picking it up, also 50%,” he mumbled to himself, pacing left and right of the room with his hand on his hip. The dial tone ends, you answered.
“Did you get to the hotel safely?” your voice is soft, almost childlike.
“Oh baby— you pick up,” he sighed, the drawl on ‘baby’ was low and almost inaudible from how deep his voice was on the phone. He bends forward out of relief, he just saw his life flashed across his life if you didn’t answer.
“You alright? Aren’t you supposed to be in bed by now?” you shuffled the stack of papers on his desk, tidying up his things.
“I… I read what you posted. On the blog,” Namjoon stood by the window where the view was beautiful but he couldn’t care less about it, “I was going to tell you, I really did. I didn’t know how.”
“Maybe start with how many exes you have?”
“One, the other 3 are friends I know from high school… I swear, I promise. No more, I won’t do it again, they were just, they hit rock bottom with nothing else. I gave them enough to reset their life, I have no feelings whatsoever with them anymore. That, whatever I had with her, it’s over. She has a toddler and she's been out of work for months. I did my research. She wasn’t lying and I was thinking about the kid. His dad got to prison.”
“Are we talking about the one who left her parents' home and basically got disowned?”
“That’s the one,” Namjoon sat on the edge of the bed. Silence from your side— that harmless silence was eating him alive.
“I’m sorry,” he hung his head low, “I’m so sorry I made you feel like that. If I could turn time around, I would have done it differently. The LA trip was coming on, so much preparations and the Jungkook thing just kept coming blow by blow, I… we couldn’t even have time together, and I was being stupid by being jealous seeing you taking Jungkook’s side when I could have just stayed home and spend fragments of time I have left before I leave, with you,” he rested his elbows on his knee, staring at the carpeted floor of his hotel.
“You’re so stubborn, won’t even admit you’re wrong even when you are,” you darted, “Your constructive criticism is harsh sometimes, don’t know how Jungkook copes with that.”
“That makes two of us,” he arched an eyebrow, smirking at the mirror as if you’re there.
“I can hear you smirking, pretty boy,” you bit your smile, “So you’re saying, you’re not trying to look for my replacement.”
“Never,” Namjoon falls back into the bed, staring at the ceiling, “You should have come with me. The things we could be doing…”
“What is it with us,” you said in a sing-song voice, “When we’re physically near, we want to rip each other’s head out, and when we’re far, we do this shit… I don’t understand.”
“Maybe it wasn’t meant to be understood, maybe it’s a wave we should choose to ride…” he smartly retorted, “And we don’t always fight when we’re together unless you consider bedroom warfare as a fight. Also, speaking of riding…” his voice gets friskier as the night goes deeper, “I sleep better when I hear your voice… it doesn’t feel right since I just apologized for my shitty behaviour… maybe in a few more days to come, we could do what we always do when I’m away?” he suggested, curling to his side with a stupid goofy smile.
“I’m nervous, so nervous baby, you have no idea,” he shakes his head and snuggles more into his fluffy pillow.
“I think I might have caught the jitters as well,” you giggled softly to the phone, “You used to tell me you feel numb, so feeling nervous is kind of good, right?”
“I miss you,” he shot in a hurry, “I was so dumb for thinking that a fight right before the take-off was a smart thing to do. I could have held your hand, kissed you longer, felt your warmth and I… threw it all for ego. And now I say I’m nervous, and you comforted me— I deserve nothing.”
“And so it played out that way, but we made up now didn’t we? It’s going to be okay, you’ll kickass there in LA and when you fly home, I’ll be right where you left me… probably naked,” you hinted as-a-matter-of-factly. Namjoon snickers foolishly despite the sexual innuendos in the description, “Can you keep me company tonight?” He turns the call to a video call and places you right next to him. “Feels like you’re really here,” you raised both eyebrows and curled more into the blanket you used to share with him. Even throwing the fabric over your phone so he won’t get cold. He giggles deeply and turns to you. You both shared a look, just drinking each other in. His eyes glided over your features sweetly and he said in whispers, “I’m sorry for what I did… I shouldn’t have done that to you.”
“Don’t do it again,” you said just as softly.
All he is— flesh and bones. You watch his eyes flutter asleep and his chest rises and falls slowly. Soft guitar chords play in your head. Namjoon, my Namjoon; your heart spoke. This little explorer boy, walking across continents to find the answers to his questions. His wondrous eyes, poetic heart took you by storm even today. So stubborn, you both are. Your intertwined hearts and diligently going forward. You watch him break and pull himself back together. Witness him gather strength from bits of yesterdays, with everything he had. Watched him fight half to death in his silent battles. When he’s here, you live. The way he swallowed his fears but vomited them through his eyes when they looked at you. These kinds of intimacy are frowned upon by many because of how few there were.
“Goodnight, autumn bear,” you spoke in hushes, afraid to wake him.
“Goodnight to you too, baby,” his deep voice made your stomach turn, and the way he smiled sleepily with half-lidded eyes, you were at a loss for words. He scoops the extra pillow in his strong arms like it was you.
“I just got here and I can’t wait to be home,” Namjoon slurs, “What have you done to me?”
> A/N: Hey guys, this is a Hoseok smut for my best friend!! It’s her birthday so I wanted to write something for her and this was what I wrote!! So @ariana-winchester95 HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!
Hoseok couldn't believe it, he had met the girl of his dreams. He had somehow, completely unknown to even him, been lucky enough to have her fall in love with him. Soon the years moved on and he had proposed, even he was shocked when she said yes.
Now a year after they had both said "I do." Hoseok still couldn't quite believe he was married to Y/N. He got to wake up to Y/N every morning, she happily woke him up every morning with a kiss.
Everyday Y/N would come to see him in the studio, everyone knew Hoseok purposely left his lunch home so she would bring it to him. He loved to see her everyday, even for half an hour for lunch. Loving to kiss her, hold his beautiful wife until she had to go back to work.
He would call and text everyday he was away on tour. Loving when she could take some time off and meet him on tour.
Everyone could see, Y/N was the biggest reason Jung Hoseok smiled. She was his own personal sun, the warmth coming from them was something no one could fake.
The was one thing that Hoseok and Y/N both wanted now that they weren't as busy as they were in their first year of marriage. And Hoseok was leaving nothing to chance, not time nor distance. If there was one word to describe Hoseok it was determined.
And he was determined to give Y/N a baby.
"Oh, fuck..." Y/N screamed, lucky the room was completely soundproof as her husband pounded into her.
Hoseok was absolutely merciless. His large, sweaty hands gripped Y/N's waist, his nails slightly digging into her skin. He had disposed of Y/N's clothes a few minutes ago before he was inside her.
Hoseok had pushed Y/N over his studio desk, stipped her bare, and made it his mission to make her cum. Like any good husband, Jung Hoseok had taken care of his beautiful wife first. Welcoming her into his studio with a kiss before shutting the door and pushing her against it. Sliding her out of her dress and straight down onto his knees, his eyes looking up as she squirmed, her hands pulling his hair.
Y/N had cum, barely standing against the door as Hoseok's mouth bought her to a damn near life ending orgasm. Trembling as she screamed his name before he stood, kissing her even more breathless. Y/N ripped at his shirt, pulling it off his toned body before he had turned her around and pushed her against his desk. His jeans sat around his ankles, her head thrown bad as he pounded into her.
"Oh god..." Y/N could feel it, the tightening in her abdomen, her legs starting to shake. "You're gonna make me cum..."
"Come on, baby girl." Hoseok's words were whispered into her ear, his chest pushed against her arched bad. "I've got you."
Hoseok hand moved down and under her, his skilled fingers finding her clit. Rubbing punishingly fast circles as Y/N chanting his name. Hoseok softly helped her through it as Y/N's high hit, Hoseok's hips never once slowing as she tightened around him.
"That's right baby, take it." Hoseok moved his hand to wrap his hand around Y/N's hair, pulling her head back.
"Hoseok..." Y/N's breathless moans spoke. "Cum in me, please..."
That was it for Hoseok, two more thrusts before he bottomed out inside her. Hoseok's head pushed into Y/N's neck, balls deep inside her as he completely emptied himself into her. Y/N hearing Hoseok groan in her ear as they both slowly tried to come down from their highs.
Y/N sighed happily. She could still feel him throbbing deep inside her. Y/N also knew he wasn't in any rush to pull out.
Since he had come to the decision to give Y/N a baby, he never let anything leave her. He wanted to give her everything she ever wanted.
This time however, Hoseok pulled out slowly, listening to Y/N's soft moans before slipping her over to face him.
"Holy fuck, that's..." Y/N moaned out.
Y/N's eyes only widen more as Hoseok's finger caught onto some that tried to run down her leg. Two fingers pushed his cum back into her opening, feeling her walls tighen around him as she moaned loudly from being oversensitive.
"Hobi..." Y/N's moved her hand down to wrap around his wrist.
"No wait." Hoseok pushed Y/N's hair out of her face as he looked into her eyes. "Just wait a bit."
Y/N couldn't help but giggle a bit, leaning her head back a bit. She really loved this crazy man.
"So, how has your day been?" Y/N asked knowing she would be sitting like this for a while, legs apart, naked and Hoseok making sure she would end up pregnant.
"Amazing now." Hosoek smiled, leaning in to softly kiss Y/N's lips who moaned loudly.
"Don't move." Y/N sat her forhead against Hoseok's sweaty shoulder, her walls tightening around his fingers. "If your gonna keep them inside of me, you can't move."
"I won't move." Hoseok looked around him, locating Y/N's panties on the small table behind him. "But I do have to go see Joon and Yoongi very soon about a new song."
Y/N nodded, breathing deeply before speaking; "You can go, I'll clean up here."
"What sort of husband would I be to just leave my beautiful wife in this position?" Hoseok's smile lit up his face. "Completely fucked out and always so ready for me."
"You're going to only end up missing that meeting if you stay." Y/N smirked, looking up form under her eyelashes at her husband.
Finally pulling his fingers out of Y/N, loving the sound of her breathy moan. Kissing her lips again before turning to grab her panties and hand them to her. Reaching down to pull his own jeans up before looking her her.
"I need to make this meeting so I guess you can go." Hoseok laughed a little, helping Y/N to get dressed.
Getting to have a very quick lunch together, Y/N soon kissed Hoseok out the door as she returned to work. She could feel him still inside her, feeling him drip to her panties before going to finish her day.
Firstly needing a shower before heading to the doctors.
xxx
Y/N got home first. Spending some time by herself, taking a bubble bath, making something delicious before sitting on the couch. The smile on her face stayed, never quite leaving as she watched anything on tv.
She heard the door open, sitting up on the couch excitedly, folding her legs under her as she saw her husband. When he mad eye contact, the smile on his face was blinding. She could see it in his eyes, he was ready for her, he was always ready for her.
But she had to tell him first.
"Wait, Hobi..."
"Tell me after."
Hoseok came forward, kissing Y/N senseless, his hands pushing her hair back, his hands on her face. Y/N manuvoured to slowly stand before Hoseok's hands moved over her ass, giving it a firm squeeze as she squealed. Hoseok took full advantage of that and slipped his tongue into Y/N's mouth, his hands slipping to her thighs and helping her to wrap her legs around his slim waist.
Hosoek could feel she wasn't wearing a bra, her already hardened nipples could be felt through the thin fabric of the shirt she wore. As Hoseok moved back to let them both catch a breath, he realised it was his shirt, before pulling it over her head. Softly kissing Y/N's lips one more time as he pushed her back against the wall on the way to their bedroom. Y/N's hands running through his hair as his lips trailed down her neck and to her chest.
Y/N moaned loudly as Hoseok's mouth latched onto one of her nipples. One of his hands came up to squeeze her other breast, his fingers playing with her other nipple. Loving the sounds coming from Y/N.
"Fuck," Y/N's head fell back, hitting the wall.
"Are you okay?" Hoseok looked up, checking on Y/N. With a satisfied nod and moan Hoseok smirked. "Always so responsive."
"Wait... Hobi, wait..." Y/N stopped Hoseok, his large puppy eyes looking up at her as she moved his hand from her breast. "No," Her head shaking slightly. "Not there tonight please."
"Are they sore?" Hoseok asked concerned, seeing Y/N nod in confirmation. "Okay, I just want to make you feel good."
Y/N smiled, pulling Hoseok in to kiss him, opening her mouth to allow his tongue access. Hoseok made quick work to get to their bed, throwing Y/N onto it as he pulled his shirt over his head. With the raise of his eyebrow, Y/N laid back comfortable, Hoseok pulling her panties down before allowing Hoseok to crawl up her body to come face to face with her.
"Hello." Hoseok leaned down to kiss Y/N softly before pushing back up on his arms.
"Hello." Y/N giggled before leaning back up to catch Hoseok's lips.
Y/N could feel Hoseok grind against her, moaning into his mouth as he did it again. Both of them knew, neither of them would last long.
Hoseok was quick, rolling over and pulling Y/N on top of him. Causing her to shout in surprise as she sat on top of him. Y/N was leaned forward, her hands holding onto the headboard to keep herself up. Hoseok hand moving to her clit, rubbing slowly and torturing her, her body slightly trembling above him.
"Are you wet for me?" One of Hoseok's hands softly tracing up her thigh as it trembled slightly, his other moved towards her opening, slowly pushing a finger into her.
Y/N sucked in a deep breath, one of her hands leaving the headboard, pushing against Hoseok chest to steady herself. Her hair fell over her shoulder, moaning loudly as her body moved automatically. Y/N was already so ready for Hoseok, always so responsive.
"Hobi, please. Fuck me."
Hoseok moved his hand from her heated pussy, both of his hands now resting on her hips.
"I'm all yours, baby girl." Hoseok smiled up at Y/N.
Y/N reached between them, lining him up with her before sinking slowly. Y/N's body shook as she let him fill her, both of them groaning loudly as he filled her completely.
"Oh fuck me..." Y/N breathed, her hands going back to the headboard for something to hold onto. "So big... always so big." Y/N whispered, chanting softly.
"Are you ready?" Hoseok asked, making sure Y/N had adjusted.
"Yes, god fuck me please."
Hoseok steadied himself before his grip went feral on her waist. Y/N was planted just above him as Hoseok's hips thrusted up. Hoseok was merciless, his thrusts were hard and choppy and never giving in. Y/N's breath coming out short, feeling every inch of Hoseok in adn out of her.
"Oh god," Y/N cried, her hands trying to steady herself as her eyes closed. "So good..."
"I need you to cum, baby girl." Hoseok choked out, feeling he wouldn't last much longer.
"Close... close... so close..."
Hoseok could feel it, Y/N tightening around him.
"Oh god... I'm cumming..."
Hoseok thrusts became choppier as Y/N's rode out her high before he came in her too. Pulling Y/N down completely onto him as she all but collapsed onto his chest. Both Hoseok and Y/N breathing deeply as they held onto each other, Hoseok still inside her.
"All I know it..." Hoseok spoke softly as both of their breathing finally came back to normal. "If your not pregnant after this week, something is wrong."
Y/N softly moved, groaning as Hoseok pulled out and she laid next to him. She stopped him quickly from making sure nothing left her.
"You don't need to do that anymore." Y/N giggled, laying down on the same pillow as Hoseok, smiling at his confused look. "It's what I wanted to tell you before..."
"What?" Hoseok pushed her hair over her shoulder, running his fingers down her arm.
"You, Jung Hoseok, are amazing." Y/N smiled. "I'm pregnant."
Hoseok didn't think he heard her. Not really registering the words.
"Pregnant?" Hoseok asked confused before realisation passed his eyes. "Pregnant?"
Hoseok looked down at Y/N's stomach before back up to her eyes. With the nod of her head Hoseok could help but shout in excitment before leaning down to kiss Y/N.
"Oh my god... we're pregnant."
"Yeah, we're pregnant." Y/N kissed her husband in his childlike glee.
"I need to call my dad."
Y/N laughed, stopping her husband to have some time with her husband first. Both of them happy to finally starting their family.
hi everyone! sorry for some delays regarding posts... i’ve been super busy but i’m back with another anon request for a scenario for the dad!jk series. right now, i’m trying to post as many request posts as i can since i have so many of them in my inbox, but yes, requests are still open! so feel free to request something if you want :) and yeah, have a lovely day!
also, here’s a link to my masterlist
anon request: Could you do a scenario for the dad!jk series where his daughter paints his nails? It could be like he fell asleep or she asks him if she can paint them. I just think that would be so cute🥺💘
genre: fluff
pairing: jungkook x reader
rating: pg ; warning(s): none
word count: 1560
*(y/d/n) = your daughter’s name
Click. You did it. It unlocked.
The small, blinking green light on top of the digital door lock indicated your success.
After unsuccessfully putting in the passcode to your door because of the groceries in your arms that were blocking your vision, you were finally here: home. You arrived at your apartment after picking up your daughter from preschool and going grocery shopping for another week’s supply of food... after your constantly ravenous husband and daughter seemed to deplete the food source within a few days.
Right as you unlocked the door, your daughter, (y/d/n), rushed into the apartment and went straight to the living room, where some of her stuffed animals and dolls were laid messily. Treading behind your daughter’s steps, you went to the kitchen to set your groceries down and looked around the apartment, seeing if Jungkook was anywhere to be found. Because he wasn’t lazily watching some television on the living room sofa or playing games on his computer with his headphones in, you assumed he wasn’t home yet.
Walking into your shared bedroom to change into some comfortable clothes before preparing dinner, your eyes grew wide, surprised to see Jungkook sleeping on the bed, small snores escaping his mouth.
I thought he was coming home late today...
Jungkook was exhausted.
After a full week’s worth of back-to-back schedules, all he wanted to do was go home and go straight to sleep... so that he could hibernate and escape from all of the responsibilities that came with being an idol. Jungkook and his members had been promoting for their new album and because their schedule was tight from the upcoming tour, they were completely booked and it was getting harder for you to even see him on the weekdays. So it made sense that you walked in on a sleeping husband... limbs oddly sprawled out across the bed with a little bit of drool coming out of the right side of his half-opened mouth, pooling around the edge of his pillow.
Although it saddened you to see him so tired from the workload, it was quite amusing to witness this odd sleeping position that you’d never seen him display before: his legs were folded in a criss-cross formation and it seemed like he didn’t even bother to cover himself with the blanket. Smiling to yourself, you wondered how he managed to sleep so peacefully without feeling any discomfort. One of his arms was on his side while the other arm was hanging off the side of the bed... and that was when you got an idea.
You walked into the living room to convince your daughter to join you in the commencement of your little prank; (y/d/n) was sitting in the middle of the living room, hunched over as her small hands gripped a bunny stuffed animal that Jungkook had won for her in a local carnival a few years back.
“(y/d/n)-ah~, where did you put the nail polish you got from school?”
Your genius idea stemmed from the conversation that you and your daughter had in the car after you picked her up from preschool; she explained how her friend gave all the girls nail polish as a “party favor” for her extravagant mermaid birthday celebration at school. At the time, you didn’t think much of it... knowing that your daughter loved to ramble on and tell you about her day at school, but after seeing Jungkook sound asleep with his hand hang off of the edge of the bed, you knew exactly how (y/d/n)’s party favor would come in handy.
You could already imagine Jungkook’s pout once he glanced at his nails and found bright, hot pink and orange splotches of nail polish on them. It had been a while since you had pranked your husband... especially since you were both constantly busy trying to balance out work and taking care of your daughter, so you thought that it would be funny to start your own prank war.
Your daughter ran up to you with her fists clenching her tiny school bag, and revealed its contents as she spilled the small containers of nail polish on the floor, already enjoying the mischievous joke she’d be playing on her dad. You shushed your overexcited daughter, indicating that if she didn’t stay quiet, the plan would be ruined. As (y/d/n) took the hint and covered her mouth, trying her best to keep quiet, you took the bottles of nail polish in one hand and held your daughter’s hand in the other as you led her down the hallway, and into the master bedroom.
(y/d/n) tiptoed across the room and approached the bed slowly, praying that Jungkook wouldn’t wake up; you smiled as you saw how enthusiastic your daughter seemed to be to paint Jungkook’s nails... once she reached the edge of the bed where Jungkook’s hand hung, she grinned and faced you, indicating for you to come to the bed. Once you crouched down next to (y/d/n), you opened the pink bottle of nail polish, with the brush at hand, ready to smear it across his nails. And once you handed your daughter the other opened bottle of nail polish, there was no stopping her. She giggled as she painted his thumb and index finger while you painted his pinkie and ring finger, excited to see her dad’s reaction. But it was when (y/d/n) got too a bit too excited when she slid her nail polish brush against one of Jungkook’s fingers that he started to stir.
Your daughter’s eyes grew wide, scared that Jungkook would wake up and catch you in the act; so she jumped to her feet and abandoned the mission by quickly running out of the room. And not soon after, you scurried out of the room yourself, not wanting to ruin the glorious work that you had half-completed. And with that, you were back in the living room with your daughter in your embrace as you giggled together, relieved that your plan was successful.
You were sitting on the dining table with your glasses on as you read your book while waiting for your soup to finish simmering before dinner was served. (y/d/n) was also reading one of her many picture books, trying to comprehend the story’s narrative as she sat next to you with her eyebrows furrowed, indicating her immense concentration.
It was then when you heard Jungkook’s feet shuffling through the hallway, that you and your daughter exchanged glances, ready to see the confused look on Jungkook’s face when he noticed the paint splotches on his nails.
You looked back down at your book, trying to act as serious as possible so that you wouldn’t give anything away.
Jungkook’s hair was messy with his shirt half untucked and half tucked from the way he turned in his sleep; his eyes were also half open as he scratched the top of his head and rubbed his eyes as he approached the two of you in the dining room. You daughter got out of her seat to give him a big hug and being the loving father that he was, he took her in his embrace, lifting her up in his arms as a smile appeared on his lips.
“How was school, love?” he asked in his raspy voice, still not fully awake from his long nap.
Your daughter couldn’t help but giggle as she glanced at the bright pink and orange nails that her resting near her side. Confused by her sudden laughter, Jungkook decided not to question it and put her down instead in order to let her continue reading her book.
He then approached you from behind, as he collapsed his body weight onto your shoulders in a lazy bag hug. You peered up at him as you removed your glasses, amazed at how after all these years you were still fond of his looks even when he just woke up from his slumber.
“Hey,” he said shortly, under his breath.
“Hi.”
His kissed your cheek and then the tip of your nose, showing you the affection that he hadn’t been showing you for the past few weeks as a result of the busy schedule.
“You notice anything?” you inquired.
Your daughter was red from holding her laughter, and you smirked as you stared at the hands that were encasing your frame.
His eyebrows furrowed, still confused about what you were saying; and it was when he decided to follow your eyes and looked down at his hands that a smile appeared on his face. He unwrapped himself from the embrace and faceplanted into his palms, realizing how ridiculous he looked with such flamboyant nails.
(y/d/n) was exploded with laughter, finding the whole situation hilarious. Jungkook leaned back down towards your ear and smirked.
“Oh, you’re sooooo on...” You glanced back at him with a nonchalant look on your face, knowing that you had just initiated a prank war with your husband.
“And you...” he said, turning to your daughter, “are also gonna pay for what you did...” And with that, he ran off, chasing your daughter around the apartment as her shrieks filled the air... making this another typical yet memorable day for the Jeons.
-Your husband is worrying so much about your pregnancy and one night you try to comfort him-
Note : I might continue this drabble, probably one or two more parts in the future
You were ecstatic when you first knew about your pregnancy. You had been feeling unwell for the whole week; you hadn’t eaten much, hadn’t gotten enough sleep because you had always felt like you were about to be sick, you had slight fever here and there. Until finally your husband, Min Yoongi, felt like you had gotten enough suffering and had begged you to go see a doctor with him. He had been asking for a few times before that, of course, but you always brushed it off because you thought you were just coming down with a flu. So it was a surprise when you finally agreed to go see a doctor and was told that you were pregnant.
The pregnancy wasn’t planned at all because you both had wanted to be just the two of you for a couple of years more even though you had been married for a year. But you were still very excited about it.
Yoongi… Not so much.
It wasn’t because he didn’t want the baby, it was because the doctor had told the both of you that your pregnancy had to be watched closely. There was a reason why you had felt sick much more than the average pregnant women, and it scared Yoongi. Even though the doctor had assured that nothing bad was going to happen as long as you drank the vitamins given, Yoongi still felt like you were walking on egg shells.
One night, when you were still in the first trimester, he went home early after he noticed that morning that you had lost your appetite again. He had brought your favorite food from the restaurant the two of you went on your first date, it had been your favorite restaurant too since then. You had only eaten a bit, he frowned beside you, he had been watching you while you both ate. Then when you both went to sleep with him spooning you, you felt him missing a few hours later when you suddenly went awake. He sat on a love seat in your room, facing you. He usually liked to sit there in the lazy days you both shared, he would sat there–watching you waking up–with a cup of coffee for him and a cup of tea for you because you couldn’t drink coffee. Sometimes you were surprised that he always woke up first in those lazy days because he admitted that he wouldn’t even left the bed on his free day before he met you. He’d sat there with a slow smile on his face, hair mussed from the activity you two did the night before, his voice still raspy from the sleep, his hooded eyes watching your body slowly up and down knowing that under that thin sheet you were naked.
But that night, his eyes were clouded with worry, there was no smile on his face, the soft light of the bedside lamp shadowing his hard features brooding in the dark room. You blinked at first, wondering if he saw you awaken. When he found your opened eyes, he held his gaze for a few seconds and then looked away. Then you found the crystal glass with whiskey on the table beside the love seat, a bottle sat beside the glass. You sat up slowly.
“Don’t worry, I only drank a sip,” he said. Your husband rarely drank, you knew from the years you’ve known him. He didn’t drink soju like other people when they eat out, he didn’t go to bars, never went to clubs because he thought it wasted his time. He only drank when there were special occasions: achievements with his band, weddings(which he rarely went); he even only drank a bit of champagne on your wedding day, he always wanted to stay sober all the time. The fact that he chose to drink whiskey that night was a big deal.
“Why are you awake?” he asked you, his eyes still not on you. “Do you feel sick?” he asked again, this time strained.
“I’m awake because you’re not sleeping beside me,” you answered, your left hand unconsciously brushing your baby bump softly up and down. He noticed and you saw his lips thinned. “Yoongi, why are you awake?”
He moved his gaze to the crystal glass, as if wondering if he should take another sip to take the edge off. He didn’t. Instead he looked at you in the eyes and said, “You know why.”
You saw the desperate expression in his eyes, saw the bleakness and you felt your heart broke to pieces. You had never seen him like that. That wasn’t like him.
You crawled from the bed and kneeled on the carpeted floor in front of him. You put one hand on his knee and one hand on his face, he closed his eyes as his head leaned to your touch. He looked so fragile it broke your heart more.
“I’m okay, you know. If you worry about why I didn’t ate much this morning and tonight, it’s really because I didn’t feel like eating much. I ate too much food yesterday, remember? You saw me ate like a crazy pregnant woman yesterday, I reminded you this morning at breakfast but you didn’t trust me. I didn’t not eat much because I felt sick, but even if I did feel sick, it’s natural for the first trimester.” You said softly to him. “You always see me taking my vitamins regularly, we always go to check ups together and there are no problems with me and the baby. I’m fine. The baby’s fine.”
“I’ve been worrying so much,” he started after a few minutes of silent, his gaze holding yours. “Sometimes… I think about what would happen to me if something happen to you or the baby. I always try to throw those thoughts away, but…” he took a deep breath as his eyes started to waver. “I can’t help but think that I would be left alone, if I lose you or the baby.”
“Hey….” you stood and sat on his lap. He circled his arms on your hips, holding tight. You cupped his cheek with your hands, your thumb brushing back and forth softly to calm him. “Nobody’s going to lose anybody, okay? Stop with the imagination. Light worrying is fine, because sometimes I worry too, but no more heavy worrying, okay, honey? I don’t want to see you feeling down like this. Let’s trust the doctor to take care of this. I promise we’ll be fine. I actually am feeling really good about this pregnancy. I think he or she is going to be the best gift God give us.”
He gave you a small smile, “I think so too.”
You pecked his lips softly, “Now stop worrying and let’s get back to sleep.”
When you both went back to the bed with him spooning you from behind, he whispered, “I love you both so much.” His voice cracked a bit on the last word as he splayed his big hand on your belly under your tank top. You smiled and snuggled back to him.
“We love you too, Yoongi.” You said, and you felt his smile as he kissed the crown of your head.
Genre: hoseok x reader, established relationship au, married au, domestic au, husband hoseok, dad hoseok, fluff, fantasy au, dream au, crack, slice of life au, oc son and daughter
Word Count: 2.9k
Summary: You can’t keep your eyes open for the life of you when Hoseok starts to read the same story your kids have asked for every night this week at bedtime. Sure enough, you find yourself starting to drift off into a realm somewhere between reality … and the storybook?
A/N: Hi! I hope you enjoy this story. I really liked writing this one, I found it adorable. No warnings as usual, but there is a slight amount of non-violent cursing in this one. Thanks for reading :)
…
“What’ll it be tonight, Sage?” Hoseok asks his little girl. Her arms are wrapped around his neck as she koala-clings to his back. With the added height of her father, she’s able to oversee the entire bookcase. Sage hums in scrutiny as she gazes over the multitude of books, using her thumb and pointer finger to rub her chin as she does so.
Perched on the soft sheets of her bed with a six-year-old Hui in hand, you wrestle a warm pajama top over his head, fresh out of the dryer for maximum comfort. “This one!” Sage perks, pointing to a book on the shelf that you can’t quite see from where you are. You can, however, see Hoseok’s lips form into a half-hearted smile as he reaches for the novel she directs him towards. “This one,” he repeats, adding with a quiet mutter, “Again.”
You groan internally upon seeing your husband turn around and make his way to the bed with the same bedtime story that had been requested all week by the two children. Hoseok shoots you a knowing look and you can almost feel the sigh that begs to leave his body. Sage climbs down from his back and into the covers next to Hui. Once he sees that both kids are nestled comfortably between the two of you, Hoseok lays back into the pillows himself.
“Ready?” he asks, turning to look down at his son and daughter. They’re snuggled cutely with their stuffed animals as they wait for storytime to begin. “Yeah!” the two excitedly reply. “Ready, mama?” he asks, turning to you with a sympathetic smile. “Yeah,” you reply as cheerfully as you can muster, although you’re clearly less excited than the little ones next to you. Hoseok chuckles, flipping the book open to its front page and beginning to read.
“Once there lived a boy and girl…” He starts, tilting the book to make sure the kids have a good view of its colorful illustrations. “…who were just the best of friends.”
Your eyes are trained on the book in his hands, but you’re already starting to tune him out. You swear you can recite this book in your sleep from start to finish, and you're beginning to think you probably do. With every turn of a page, you already know what lies on the next.
“The two of them loved to read, and they often did so beneath the shade of the most beautiful oak tree,” Hoseok read, looking down to see Sage and Hui’s soft and sleepy smiles. The beautiful oak tree, drawn large and vibrant, was their favorite part of the book. If there’s one thing you could thank this story for, it’s for making reading your kids’ newfound obsession. Lately, they spend their days with stacks of books underneath whatever tree they could find, just like the two characters. It’s adorable.
As the tale goes on, you can’t help the growing heaviness of your head. All you can do is hope that by tomorrow the kids will have finally lost interest in this book. Your eyes begin to flutter as Hoseok turns the page. You let them close and opt to just listen, blindly.
You snuggle deeper into the mass of pillows beneath you, unable to stay interested in the story you’ve heard a million times. “When they read, their imaginations took them to worlds far, far away, where they could be anything they wanted to be,” Hoseok continues softly, stifling his own yawn. “The boy read stories of being a superhero, where he would fly through the sky and protect his people.” Hoseok begins to imitate the sound of comic book effects, waving his arms as if he's flying. “The girl read stories of being a princess, where she wore pretty dresses and stood with poise,” he reads, patting his face as if to apply makeup before pretending to fluff his hair. Sage and Hui fall into a fit of giggles, their father’s animations never getting old. Despite the tiring story, you have to smile. He was a natural.
“‘I wish I was a princess,’ the little girl said. 'I wish I was a superhero,’ the little boy said.”
“Little did they know, the boy and girl should’ve been careful of what they wished for,” you recite from memory in your head as your husband reads aloud. As Hoseok reads the next line, his voice suddenly begins to slip farther and farther.
“A moment later, underneath the beautiful oak tree, lay nothing but their two books, flipping pages in the wind …”
A harsh shove to his shoulder knocks Hoseok to the ground and nearly the wind out of him as well. He blinks as a man suited in silver armor dashes past him, with no regard for his crumpled form. Before Hoseok can begin to stand, an army of men dressed similarly to the first surge past him. The rush of metal-adorned feet clanging around him barely allows him to get up from his seat on the floor.
“Sir!” He hears a voice call out in the distance. One of the silver-clang men reaches out a hand to him, finally coming into sight as the crowd charges on into the distance. “Sir!” he calls again, lifting Hoseok to his feet. It’s all Hoseok can do to stare at the man, a complete stranger he can’t recognize. He feels as if he’s lost in a daze, unable to make sense of anything taking place.
“The princess has gone missing! We need your help!” the man cries. Hoseok squints apprehensively at his alarmed state. “Princess?” he murmurs confusedly. With the flood of knights no longer blocking his view, Hoseok is finally able to take a good look at his surroundings. He finds his feet adjourned by a meadow of flowers, topped with a slim strip of pebbles that lead to a large set of double doors. The two doors are at the foot of a mighty castle whose towers cut through the clouds. Off in the distance, he sees a brown wooden bridge hovering over a moat and the army of knights running synchronously across. Reaching just below his knees, a silky blue cape flutters behind him.
'You’ve got to be kidding me,’ Hoseok thinks.
“Come on,” the man yells before him, running off to join the others. “The king has ordered that we search the town hall.”
“Right,” Hoseok mumbles, only half-listening as he speaks. His eyes are trained on a familiar flash of hair that graces a window in the castle before him. He can’t help but have an idea that the princess might be somewhere else.
“Jesus!” you yelp, visibly shaken when the door behind you flings open, slamming against the wall behind it. You turn around with a startled glare that melts into a smile as you see your panting husband. “Oh!” you breathe, breaking into a smile. “Hobi!” Hoseok stands in the doorway with a sagging posture and dripping locks. “Really?” he asks you, unamused. “Did you have to choose the top floor? Of a castle?!”
You shrug sheepishly. “Sorry … It’s quietest up here.” Hoseok shakes his head. “Have you forgotten we don’t have elevators in this era?” he complains, shaking the sweat from his hair.
“And exactly which era do we belong to, Mr. 'Superhero’ ? Please do tell the princess,” you banter. Hoseok chuckles, looking up to meet your eyes. Finally standing straight, Hoseok can take in your appearance. You’re clad in a beautiful gown of blue and pink lace, decorated with intricate slices of fabric of the same shades. Beads of glittering diamonds adorn your arms and the pink corset around your waist. Hoseok can hardly stand to look at you, having to drop his eyes to the floor before he can meet yours again. He smiles broadly as he steps forward to meet you, taking your hands gently in his.
“Princess…” he mumbles to himself, thinking the image suits you well despite the insanity of it all. Then, he turns to speak to you. “You look amazing.”
You grin brightly at him. “Why, thank you, sir.” He laughs. “You don’t look too bad yourself, hero.” You gaze up and down at his tight-fitting suit and the fluttering cape that trims his back. “Please,” he says. “I look ridiculous.” You cackle, far too amused with the entire predicament you two had found yourselves in.
“You know, this isn’t where you’re supposed to be,” Hoseok informs you. “Your knights are headed-” “to the town hall. I know,” you finish, plopping down onto a couch nearby. “I’m just so sick of this story, I can’t bear to hear another second of the same thing.”
Hoseok laughs, pulling his cape to the side as he takes a seat next to you. “I’m stuck, the knights can’t find me, you fly in and save the day, we find an oak tree, and it takes us back home. Blah, blah,” you grumble. “I don’t remember the little girl in the book being this grumpy of a princess,” Hoseok teases. “Well, the little girl in the book didn’t have to be a princess every day this week, did she?” He shakes his head at you with a chuckle.
“Sooner or later the knights will realize you’re not in the town hall,” Hoseok says, standing to his feet. “I’m sorry baby, but I’m not interested in seeing this children’s book turn into a horror movie when they realize we’ve messed with their world.”
He tugs you to your feet and starts dragging you towards the door. The sound of sudden voices from the window has him stopping in his tracks and he lets go of you for a moment to enter your balcony. Leaning over the edge, he sees that the army of knights has reconvened at the foot of the castle, clearly deeper in distress.
Too late.
“Ah, shit,” Hoseok mutters.
Having followed, you peek over his shoulders, eyes tracing the massive army as well. “Shit,” you agree.
“But we can work with this,” you decide. “We’ll just tell them you found me here! False alarm?” Hoseok stares down at you. “Trying to change the plot never goes well in these things.”
“The age recommendation for this book is 4 - 10, how badly could it possibly go.” You grab Hoseok’s hand, leading him back down the stairwell. As you step further down, the voices of the knights grow louder and you can start to make out their frightened conversations.
You hear accusations fly left and right. Suddenly, everyone in the town is a suspect in your disappearance. And the main one seems to be your husband right beside you, a superhero who, strangely, never showed up to his task.
You huff. “Well, that’s out the window.” “Great, they could throw me in jail,” Hoseok grunts. “The jail was drawn with a pencil. If they throw you in there, I’ll just erase it,” you joke. “Or better yet, I’ll tear those pages out!” Hoseok fixes you with a glare. “You find this whole thing funny don’t you?” You do your best to act serious, looking him in his eyes. “Hoseok, look at us,” you say, with a sincere expression. “Of course, I find this funny."
Your faux seriousness fades immediately and you double over with laughter. Hoseok scoffs and walks off from you, not letting you see the brief smile he gave in to your comedy.
“Whatever,” he says with his back to you, moving back up the stairs. “Let’s just find this oak tree and get out of here.”
Back on the balcony, you and Hoseok lean over, watching as the knights continue to panic amongst themselves in the meadow. "Your knights suck by the way,” Hoseok says, watching them scramble. “Why don’t they try looking for you somewhere else instead of wasting time?” You nod. “To be fair, this wasn’t supposed to happen. I imagine they’re about as confused as we were.”
At this, Hoseok turns to look at you. “Why couldn’t you just pay attention?” he complains. “It’s a cute story!” “That we’ve read a million times,” you counter. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep. My brain just gave out,” you sigh. Hoseok sighs as well. “To be fair, if it hadn’t been you, it would’ve been me. The only thing keeping me awake was the fact that I was reading,” he says. You giggle.
“How do we get past them?” you ask, looking back over the knights. “I have an idea,” Hoseok says. “What is it-” You barely finish your sentence before you realize what Hoseok is doing. He grabs you into a tight hold and starts to lift off in the air. He only makes it a few feet before you start kicking and screaming. His eyes bulge as he stares at you. “What are you doing? You want us to get caught?” he whisper-yells setting you back on the ground. “That was scary!” you whisper back, swatting at his arm. “We have to think of a different way. I am NOT flying."
"This is the only way we’re getting out of here,” Hoseok reasons. “No,” you whine. “Remember the pencil jail? I’ll draw you the prettiest garden over it instead, I promise,” you beg. Hoseok rolls his eyes, grabbing your waist to pull you into him again. You grab his hands where they latch, fruitlessly trying to shove him off as you ramble, “Or an amusement park? A movie theater? Hobi, please?” He jumps onto the ledge of the balcony with you tucked under his arm and you squeak like a mouse. “No, no, no, don’t! Stop! I’m scared! Aah-!"
With his hand over your mouth, shushing you and your squeals, Hoseok leaps off the edge and into the sky, taking you with him. Your eyes are squeezed shut and you’re clinging onto him for dear life. "It’s okay, baby,” he whispers in your ear. “Look, we’re flying.”
Cautiously, you allow yourself to peek out of one eye. You gasp, finding yourself floating above the tops of colorful trees and shining rivers. The knights, now far behind you, start to look like ants as you fly away from the castle. You are quite literally in the clouds.
“See, baby? I’m a superhero. I got you,” Hoseok smirks. You can’t let him get away with it, even if he’s right. “You’ve been a superhero for one day, calm down,” you mumble. He cackles, flying higher.
“That must be the one,” you say, pointing down. Hoseok twists to see a tree that stands out significantly against the rest of the colorful world surrounding you. It’s the only realistic-looking piece of nature in the forest of child-like vibrance. “I think you’re right,” he hums, swooping down to land beneath it.
Your body meets the bed of grass softly, laying under the oak tree’s large leaves. A content smile finds its way onto your face. In between you and Hoseok, lies the same book you’re supposed to be listening to beneath the covers next to your two kids and husband, but instead have found your way inside of. Hoseok lays next to you, taking in the beautiful illustration all around you. “Would you like to do the honors?” he asks, tilting his face to meet yours. “Not yet,” you shake your head. “This was pretty fun.” Hoseok nods.
“I must say, it all suits you quite well. You already look the part for a princess,” he thinks aloud. You blush. “You could honestly stay here if you wanted to.”
“And miss Sage’s dance recital tomorrow? Not for the world,” you say, sitting up and smoothing out your dress. Hoseok chuckles, sitting up as well and pushing the book towards you. “Well then?”
You take the book in your hands and flip it open to the last page.
“The boy and the girl returned safely to their homes, satisfied with their adventure for the day,” Hoseok reads. “'Tomorrow, we get to read a new book and be anything we want again!’ the boy exclaimed. 'Pirates, Ninjas, Mermaids…!’ the girl went on. And the best part is that they get to do it together,” he finishes, closing the book softly.
Hoseok looks to his side, seeing Sage and Hui cuddled into each other, sleeping as soundly and peacefully as ever. He coos down at the two. Getting to see them like this in the end, meant Hoseok would read the book every night if they asked for it.
“They’re out,” he whispers to you, lightly brushing Sage’s hair from her eyes. Hoseok pauses when the only response he gets are gentle snores that come from neither of the children. Peering up at you, he sees that you’re knocked out right beside them, clearly deep in your own wonderland. He almost wants to laugh at the odd occurrence. You never fall asleep during bedtime stories, always wanting to kiss the kids goodnight before going to bed to doze off yourself.
Hoseok wonders what could possibly have you in such deep sleep.
He shakes it off, deciding to just leave you there rather than disturb your slumber. He sets the book on the bedside next to him and leans over to give the sleeping kids their goodnight kisses. Tugging the string to shut out the lamp, he quietly leaves the bed before circling to the other side where you lay. He rests a hand on your shoulder and gives a gentle kiss to your cheek, whispering quietly,
“Dream of me.”
before making his way into the hall and shutting the bedroom door.
Genre: hoseok x reader, hoseok x oc, established relationship au, married au, domestic au, husband hoseok, dad hoseok, fluff, angst, slice of life au, oc son and daughter
Word Count: 3.2k
Summary: D-Day had stumbled upon you and Hoseok — the day you’d have to say goodbye to your daughter as she goes off to college. But when she chooses a school that’s nearly halfway across the world from you two, Hoseok isn’t sure he can handle the pain of separating from his pride and joy.
Warnings: Not really any. There is a short lived fear of disappointment from parents and a short anxiety mention.
A/N: Hi! It’s been a little while! I already made a post about this but I was in a bit of a stump with my writing. But the ideas are flowing now, so I’ll likely be back to a more frequent schedule! This HSH is rather angsty, beware, lol. But you can look forward to some new characters making a cameo! Writing these is honestly doing so much for my inner child. A lot of these stories that I write are moments that I probably needed when I was younger, and moments that I hope I can create for my future kids. This series really means a lot to me. I hope you enjoy, and thanks for reading! <3 feel free to let me know ur thoughts, i love commentary :)
…
The porcelain coat of the fine china above you continues to rest just out of reach. Despite your multiple efforts to grab them off the shelf, you just couldn’t hold your grip. The tips of your fingers merely graze the bowls’ edges, your tiptoes not providing the leverage you need. With a huff, you slump back to your hopeless height, peeking around the large cabinet of expensive dinnerware to see your husband.
“Hobi,” you call. “Could you help me reach these bowls?”
Hoseok’s head turns at the sound of your voice. He sighs, abandoning the broom he was dusting across the kitchen floor. “Baby, this is why we have stools stationed around the house,” he says, coming up behind you. “Right,” you agree with a cunning smile. “But why would I go out of my way to use one when I have my human stool right in front of me?”
Hoseok snorts. Your witty tease earns you a pinch to the side from your husband.
His arm reaches high above your head as he towers over your smaller stature. “Yeah, yeah,” he chuckles, taking the porcelain bowls in his hands and dropping them into yours. “Thank you, sir!” you chirp, passing him a freshly washed stack of dishes to replace the ones he’d just given you. Carefully, you place your stack into a storage box to later be put away.
You and Hoseok have been working on putting your kitchen and dining room back together after bidding goodbye to your last guest of the night. Ever the party planner, you’d put together an intimate last gathering between family and friends before Sage, your oldest child, would head off to college.
12 hours and 7,000 miles.
That is the amount of time you still have before you and your first child will be separated by that amount of distance.
Along with her younger brother, Hui, Sage has always been a smart girl. You and Hoseok specifically crafted your lives to provide your children with every tool they needed to go as far as they desired in life. It was part of your vows to each other as husband and wife, and as future parents. As far as the two of you were concerned, if one of your kids wanted to be an astronaut, then from that point on, they were one. Because you knew you held all the resources to get them there.
They went to the best schools, had the most qualified tutors, and were placed in a surplus of “get ahead” programs. Financial worries didn’t exist in your home. And with Hoseok surpassing in his duties as the breadwinner of the Jung household, you had more than enough time to play your role as full-time caretaker, ensuring that all other needs were met.
They were simply set up to succeed. And why not? You and Hoseok love your kids. They were your world before they’d even been born. You hold many memories of the two of you fantasizing about your future together, wondering who’d get your eyes or who’d get his lips. Naive and optimistic, you and Hoseok had been sure in your younger years that you’d one day have a beautiful family to call yours. So when you found out that baby Sage was on her way, you both vowed nothing but the best in exchange for her making your dreams come true.
Which is why, when your daughter chose to study in a country abroad, you had to let her go. You wouldn’t let your happy demeanors falter for even a second, no matter how deep the cracks formed in your heart. You both knew it’d break you to see your baby go, but you’d promised her the world.
You and Hoseok bore your brightest smiles as you lined the dinner table with candles, flowers, and decor. Champagne glasses glittered from fairy lights that hung low off the ceiling, decorating the shiny silverware with a glint of their own. Tears long sucked up and forced down your throat, you’d readied yourselves to say goodbye to your little girl.
“Wow. How does the time go by so fast?” Jin shook his head, cutting into the steak that laid on his plate. He was seated between his wife and his own daughter, Yoo-Jung.
“Exactly,” Hoseok chimed, taking a bite of his own. Across from where you sat, next to your two kids and husband, Yoo-Jung frowned.
“Why do you have to go so far?” she whined. “We could have gotten an apartment together!”
You and Jin’s wife shared an apologetic look across the table. Sage and Yoo-Jung had practically grown up together. Jin was the first out of the boys to marry, having met his wife while co-hosting a show alongside her. Against all odds, the two had managed a healthy relationship despite being tied up in their similar careers. When Jin, Hoseok, and the rest of the group agreed to settle down, he and his wife announced their pregnancy shortly after. Just months later, you and Hoseok did the same and both you and Jin’s wife gave birth to little girls.
The closeness in age of your kids brought your two families close together, and the four of you practically raised the children altogether. Given that the two girls were basically glued at the hip, they probably did make a pact to live together at some point. But Sage was going to college outside of the country and Yoo-Jung preferred to start a career in acting, following in the steps of her mom and dad.
“What apartment?” Jin asked. “Unless you have your own income or decide to go to school, you’re staying at home.” Yoo-Jung huffed. “But I’m an adult now!” she whined. “Exactly!” Jin laughed. “Adults buy apartments with their own money, not their parents’.
A ripple of chuckles made its way around the table as Jin and his daughter bickered. Yoongi swirled the wine in his glass, perched next to his own young child. “You’re too hard on her, hyung.”
“You pay for it then!” he spat jokingly. “I‘ll forward you the rent.”
Hoseok heads back to the kitchen where his broom lay, abandoned. He can’t help the hitch of his breath as he passes the suitcases packed neatly by the front door. He has to remind himself to hold it together, staying true to the promise you and he made to send your daughter off happily. For now at least, she was just feet away, having opted for alone time in the garden after dinner. Hoseok pauses when he catches sight of Sage still lounging on the grass through the glass doors.
Midnight was quickly approaching and she had a long day ahead of her tomorrow. The last thing Hoseok wants is a sleepless night adding to what he knew would be a hard day for all of you. He makes his way to the door, turning the knob and stepping into the chill of the night.
Sage doesn’t make any moves to look up at the sound of his entrance. Her body is nestled in the soft grass beyond the patio, eyes trained upwards at the stars above her. Hoseok can feel a solemn tension wafting through the air.
He decides to tread lightly, sensing that her pensive state isn’t one he should yet disturb. Silently, he steps forward and lays next to her, mimicking her pose and stare. For a while, he allows them to just watch as the night sky goes by, sitting in comfortable quietness.
He knows Sage is excited about school, so the tension he senses confuses him. Since the day she’d received her acceptance letter, she’s been nothing but smiles. He’d often catch her raving about it to Yoo-Jung over the phone late at night.
“But you’re my best friend! What am I supposed to do without you for four years?” that familiar whine sounded through the receiver.
Sage rolled over in her bedsheets, pausing to cover the speaker when footsteps shuffled past her bedroom door. She waited to see the light in the hallway click off before returning to the call.
“It’s not really four years,” she whispered. “I’ll be back for the summers!”
“That’s only two months of every year,” Yoo-Jung pouted. “What about all the new friends you’ll make in the other ten? When you forget all about me.”
“Come on, you know I won’t. You’re practically my sister,” Sage contested. “Besides, aren’t you happy for me? I got into my dream school!”
In her own bed, Yoo-Jung smiled, but it was only bittersweet. “Of course, I am. We’re all proud of you.” She chewed at her fingernails, aware she may be psyching her friend out. “I’m just gonna miss you, that’s all.”
“I know. I’ll miss you too,” Sage smiled back. “But this will be a great opportunity. And I’m sure Uncle Jin will let you visit me a few times. He has to at least do that much.”
Yoo-Jung snorted.
Sage’s laugh followed through on her end. “And what about all the movie star friends you’re going to make while I’m away at school? When you come to see me, we’ll stay up all night in my dorm watching your films while you tell me which actors secretly have beef off set.”
Yoo-Jung apparently laughed a little too loudly at that. “Yoo-Jung-ah!” Jin’s voice suddenly boomed in the background. “Oops,” she muttered. “Go to bed!“ he echoed. “Your graduation ceremony is tomorrow and we are not running late.”
“I know, I know!” Yoo-Jung sighs. “I just couldn’t sleep so I called Sage really quick.”
“Uh huh,” he responds, unconvinced. “When have you ever not been good at sleeping, Yoo-Jung?” A stiff chuckle catches in Jin’s throat and the two girls brace themselves for the dad joke they know must be coming.
“You can practically do it with your eyes closed!”
A groan makes its way through Sage’s speaker before the call clicks off.
Now, a shadow of that same excitement resides in the young girl next to Hoseok as he tilts his head to peek at her. She hasn’t moved since he arrived, only offering slow blinks as she stares blankly at the stars.
“You okay, kiddo?” Hoseok nudges gently.
He watches as the open-shut motion of her eyelids speeds up, tears quickly forming behind them.
“I just,” she starts. “I just think I’m going to miss you guys a lot.”
Hoseok swallows, feeling his own eyes well up at the sight of hers.
“It’s all just now starting to hit me,” Sage continues softly. “I think I’ve been subconsciously suppressing the fact that I’m kind of nervous about this whole thing. I feel bad because everyone has been so encouraging towards me, but in all honesty…” She trails off. A sob rises in her throat and she chokes on her words. The sound stabs Hoseok like a knife.
“…the thought of getting on that plane tomorrow scares me.”
“I’ve been ignoring it because I didn’t want to dwell on the feeling,” she says. “And I didn’t want to make you and mom worry when you’ve been so happy for me. I couldn’t ruin the mood like that.”
Hoseok lies quietly as he takes in her words. It dawns on him that this whole time, his daughter has held the same fear as the two of you.
There were so many moments Hoseok wanted to tear up just at the sight of her. She could be seated on the couch, scrolling through TV channels, and he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from realizing that in due time, this wouldn’t be a sight he could walk in on anymore. When she’d leave to meet with friends, he’d become hyper-aware of the silence that took over.
He can’t help but wonder if the air will be this chilly when she leaves for college, too.
But it was what she wanted. It would only get harder from this point on. Next, she’d be moving into a house of her own, and then a home with a man he’d yet to meet. Hoseok wonders how many more times he’ll have to say goodbye to her.
Your little girl was growing up before his eyes and neither him nor you could stop it from happening.
You and Hoseok soon came to realize that the hardest part of being a parent was being strong for your kids. Not crying when they did. Not kicking and screaming when they did. Not hurting when they did.
You both taught your kids to feel their emotions fully and to never be ashamed of crying, while you instead mastered the art of holding it in.
Your eyes fluttered open at the soft sunlight peeking through the window’s blinds. A waft of melancholy had already made its way through the bedroom, it seemed. You weren’t even given a chance to smell the flowers.
You turned to meet the eyes of your husband, who’d been awake for a while by the looks of it. “She’s leaving tomorrow,” he whispered.
Your face twisted. You’d tried so hard to hold it in. You’d hoped that today would wait a little longer to come, but time stops for no one. You doubt tomorrow will be any kinder.
Hoseok held onto you as you cried. His sniffles filled the air above you and his chest shook heavily as he broke down himself. The two of you embraced each other in silence, simply letting the tears fall. In an hour, the kids would wake up, and in ten, the dinner party would begin .
Sad as you were, you wouldn’t let your daughter see. She was excited about college and so deserving of her acceptance. You wouldn’t dim her light. You wouldn’t cry in front of her.
As you laid in bed, getting it all out, you and Hoseok agreed. These were the last tears you’d shed until she boarded that plane.
“I just wish I’d allowed myself to feel it sooner,” Sage sniffled. “Because it’s hitting me like a truck now.”
Oddly, a sense of comfort begins to snowball in Hoseok’s chest as his daughter vents.
You and Hoseok have always done your best to create a bubble of happiness for your children — a bubble that would shield them from all of the evil and unfairness of the real world. You had set them up to succeed. You had set them up for happiness. You were doing the best you could.
Weren’t you?
Tears continued to cascade down her cheeks as Sage tried to fight them. “I don’t know if I can do this,” she spoke in a timid whisper.
As he watched her tears fall, Hoseok came to a revelation of his own. The reality was, whether you and he could accept it or not, the world wasn’t dripping in sweetness. And no matter how many programs your kids got into, how many commas you could afford in tuition, or how many private tutors you could get staffed, that bubble of ease wasn’t all that the world had to offer. And soon enough, they’d have to figure that out.
And he’d have to let them.
But in order to do so, he couldn’t allow himself to ignore the pending pop of that bubble either.
It’s in this moment that he realizes just how much Sage truly has grown. She’s mature enough to handle emotions outside of those that are sickly sweet. Maybe more mature than you and he have been all these years.
He couldn’t stop his kids from growing up and moving on. At some point, he had to accept that they just won’t need him in the same ways that they used to. He’d have to accept the fact that as they learn to navigate on their own, they are destined to trip. But he can’t keep breaking their fall anymore. Rather, sometimes, he needs to let them scrape their knees before he helps them back up.
His daughter didn’t need him to hide negative emotions from her. She needed him to feel them with her.
Sage’s sobs halt in her throat at the sound of quiet weeps beside her. Confused, she turns to see her father, now turned away as tears roll down his pursed lips. Her heartbeat quickens and her choked sobs form into wails.
“Dad?” she calls. “Are you upset?”
Hoseok can’t find it in him to respond, the guilt weighing on his chest is too heavy for him to speak. He doesn’t have the heart to meet his daughter’s eyes knowing he could’ve helped her through the pain he didn’t even know she was feeling.
He can only nod and the shame wrecks his body.
His daughter’s wails grow in volume. “Are you disappointed?”
Hoseok feels his heart sink. His heart breaks for the mess that’s become of his sweet child who wipes at her tears fruitlessly.
“I know you and mom were excited for me to go,” she sobs. “And I am, I just… I’m- I don’t know.”
“Shh, shh,” Hoseok hushes her, pulling her into his arms. Fully grown or not, she’ll always fit perfectly and safely in his embrace. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to,” he assures her.
“I’m not disappointed in you, Sage. I’ve never been disappointed in you,” He coos, running his fingers gently through her hair to calm her anxiety. “I’m disappointed in myself. How could I not have seen it sooner?” he sighs, the question pointed more at himself than at her.
“Because I hid it from you,” she frowns, tears finally coming to a stop as she hiccups softly. “I’m sorry. Don’t blame yourself.”
He appreciates her words, but he knows he has to.
Hoseok rubs her back, further soothing her as she settles into his arms. “Don’t be sorry, kiddo. You have no reason to be.” He shifts to wipe the remaining tears from under her eyes.
“We don’t have to leave tomorrow if you’re not ready. We still have plenty of time before classes start. How about we make the most of this week and get you a new plane ticket after?”
Sage nods. “That would be nice.”
Hoseok nods as well. “It’s not like your mom and I can complain about getting to keep you for a little longer.” She smiles.
“You know, Sage, your mom and I were happy for you to go to college because you were happy to go to college. All we care about is your happiness. No matter what walk of life you find it in,” Hoseok says softly.
“Don’t feel afraid to change your mind, or to let us know that you have fears just because we are happy. The second something stops bringing you joy, it does the same for us as well.”
Sage listens quietly, taking in her father’s words. “We need to know these things so that we can care for you properly. We’ve raised a smart girl. That much I’m sure of. And we’ll always be proud of you. No matter what. So be honest with us. And we’ll do our best to do the same for you.”
Sage sniffles, tears falling once again for an entirely different reason. Hoseok pulls her tighter in his embrace, if even possible, letting her use him for all the comfort she needs.
“Thank you,” she whispers.
“I love you, dad.”
A new set of tears well up in Hoseok’s eyes, and this time, he knows better than to stop them from falling. “I love you too,” he nods, content with knowing that two important lessons had been learned that night.
A soft caress on the side of his face as he lay asleep in the middle of your bed, invading the side that you assigned to yourself. You glide your hand down the length of his shoulder down his forearms before leaning down for a trail of kisses all over his cheeks.
“Wakey, wakey, baby…” you brushed your lips and spoke in gentle hushes, “you told me to wake you up at 8.30am, it’s now 8:35.”
He moans sleepily in return, eyes shut while his hand wildly search for the ends of the duvet, attempting to pull them up to cover his shoulders again. Of course. You passed the opposing wall a blank stare, the I-knew-this-was-gonna-happen face. You climbed on the bed, over his sleeping body, and to the curtains before yanking it open. Namjoon did nothing more but whine, rocking his body side to side--just like a child throwing morning tantrum. “Come on,” you knelt next to his lanky legs, his toes peeping out the ends of the duvets that didn’t manage to cover his whole being. He sat up after a while and leaned his forehead on your back. “I’m so sleepy…” he murmured.
“I can see that, so I brought coffee…” you reached the back of his head with your right hand, fluffing his bed hair. You feel him smiling against your back and how his lips moved to the back of your neck. “This is honestly why I married you…” he added a low deep chuckle that wasn’t intentionally sexual.
“Glad to be your honorary coffee maker…” you retorted and switched to face him, sitting on the bed still, to cup his face, “I am extremely underpaid.”
He began thumbing your side with a drowsy smile, almost drunken, chuckling. “With added benefits, I believe…” he pursed his lips, with his heavy-lidded eyes, fishing for a kiss. You clicked your tongue after a quick peck and pushed his face away before he could deepen them, giving him a lopsided smile, “In this economy? Sounds too good to be true if you ask me…”
“Am I asking, though?”
You took in a steady inhale, and your eyes turned into thin slits, peering at your husband and his snarky reply so early in the day.
“You will treat me with respect. You will treat me as a wife,” you prodded his chest with your index finger, “Or you will no longer have one.” You cocked an eyebrow and moved away from the bed despite him holding on loosely, “Hurry the fuck up, the pancake is getting cold…” you disappeared outside. Namjoon pushed both the heel of his palm on the mattress with a smile playing on his lips. His wife is feisty and he loves it. He won that conversation and he knows it. As soon as he stepped outside with the mug you coaxed him awake with, your phone camera was on him. He is being followed very closely.
“May I know what these footages are for?” He said, looking down the water washing down his mug.
You zoomed into his fluffy arms. He wore tanks to sleep and his BCG Vaccine scar showing up pretty nicely from the distance you were filming him at.
“For days that I terribly miss you,” you passed, “Because even though you’re always on your phone, you never have time to send me a cute self-portrait, so I’m making a video for myself…”
He fills his mug with plain water now, leaning against the counter, his black tank showing his ribs from this angle, he took a mouthful sip before talking through the mug, “For days you missed me? Am I hearing this correctly?”
You nodded from behind the camera, and Namjoon lifts his face and placed his mug aside, “Come here,” he ordered.
“Why.”
“Just get here.”
“No.”
“If we’re saving that for our times away, shouldn’t there be a memorable scene.”
Intriguing, you thought.
“What do you have in mind--”
“--you know what I have in mind.”
You had to stop recording because he was getting rather bold with his words and facial expressions. Sitting on one chair, you sat on his lap while sharing a plate of pancake, drenched with honey. You grimaced at the first bite he fed you. “How are you eating this much sweetness…” you commented.
“To chase away the bitterness of the coffee…” he shoved another bite-sized into his own mouth. You set your phone to lean against the vase, to shoot horizontally. “We’re back filming?” he asked, his palm gliding up and down your lower back, glancing once in a while at the camera.
“Is this camera going to follow me when we arrive at the studio building later?” he asked, looking at the food and then at you for confirmation.
“Yes… you have a problem with that? You want to sue me for it?” you challenged him a smile, biting your lips and he broke eye contact immediately, scoffing.
“Can you afford the legal fees going against me?” Namjoon licks the residue honey on the corner of his lips.
“Now you’re just showing off your big dick energy, big boy…” you circled your arm around his neck and retorted, “Isn’t that what got you interested in the first place?”
“Wow, almost six years of marriage and you still don’t know that I’m only after your money,” you nuzzled the tip of your nose on his.
Namjoon closes in, whispering hotly against your mouth, “I don’t care if you’re only using me for my money, I only want to earn for you...honey.” He embraces your lips with his own, kneading the flesh together in a rhythmic motion, with literal honey still lingering on his tongue, fully aware that your phone is filming his every move. He made sure that his tongue made a glimpse as it enters yours, him passing a glance at the lens from the corner of his eyes as if to remind himself that he was being recorded.
“I want a copy of this footage later,” he spoke in hushes, against your ear as you give the camera your clothed back. His dark brown eyes darting at the camera as he sinks his teeth onto your shoulder, playing the staring game with it.
“Who cares about what you want,” you darkly chuckled.
Brushing your teeth next to each other become a routine, now that he’s home more than he leaves the country. He pokes your side and pinched your cheek at any chance he gets, so that’s something. Something about being home with him felt natural but extraordinary because he rarely gets to do so in the early years of your marriage. “You know, when you rap, there’s this vein on the right side of your neck protruding out, and I think it’s so sexy…” you traced the length of the vein with your index finger, tiptoeing next to him, by memory.
“You think everything I do is sexy,” he shot back, and spit out foams into the sink before rinsing off with little thought.
“But am I wrong though,” you pushed his entire body as he bends over with little strength, and he stumbles to the side a bit.
He leaves the bathroom with a playful kiss on your clothed butt cheek, hollering, “Of course you’re right. You’re always right…” on his way out.
“You’re choosing my outfit today!” You reminded him.
“Got it!” He yelled from the walk-in wardrobe.
“I’m thinking of something sophisticated yet modest...something shapey but not too tight, maybe a little loose,” his index finger on his chin as he trudges forward then back repeatedly, “I’m thinking Versace?” He took out a printed silk blouse with blue pants.
You walked out with a black purse, commenting, “I look like a rich man’s mistress on a Mallorca getaway, spending his hard-earned money while he fucks another 19-year-old blonde, and I get to purchase a very handsome male companion with an Italian name like, Emanuele, whom I bore a child with; so I can get a run for the rich dude’s money when I file for divorce.”
Namjoon let out a delicious moan, “Very scandalous. I like it too.” He lifts his butt from the couch and followed you out the door.
“But if you were my mistress, I wouldn’t be fucking anyone else and Emanuele shall never exist. It’s just you, me and Mallorca,” he shut the door behind him and it automatically clicked locked.
He fastens his seatbelt while you fixed the rearview mirror because it’s been tilted in a weird angle after a sudden roll in the car the other day. You just can’t stop touching each other whenever you guys were left unsupervised. This is why you both have no friends apart from his members. “If you liked the veins in my neck, then I love the sexy mole on the apex of your left thigh…” the belt clicks while the car engine hurls on.
“How on earth did you remember I have a mole there? What’s with the sudden compliment about my body?” you eyed him with suspicions read all over your face.
“It’s super sexy. When I think of it, I get super horny? Also, you have like three very prominent moles, from my memory… the thigh, the pinky toe and one behind your right ear,” he clicked his tongue while the car moves out the parking lot.
“The details of that description is honestly disturbing,” you shot, steering the wheel with both your hands, “We’re not going to be long in the studio building right? I don’t trust you being there with me without getting handsy, knowing your touchy ass.” You eyed him up and down, giving him a side glance with a slight warning. “Whenever I see you, I don’t want to behave…” Namjoon leans over to your side, grinning.
“See, this is what I’m talking about…” you darted emotionlessly.
You have never been inside of Namjoon’s office. Not since they moved. Namjoon said he renovated his studio again, changing the soundproof walls--or as you call it, sponge walls that offers a great cushion for any rough acts. Both of you are terribly explicit and have too many inside jokes for anyone to keep up with. Most of your friends can’t tell if you both were fighting or basically roasting each other to no end. The sarcasm gets too raw and merciless at times, coming from two very sensitive people the world had ever seen. Namjoon and you are like lovers who secretly hate each other when you’re around people and strangers, but can be very lovey-dovey when it’s least expected. That’s why when you took yourself inside the building after waiting for about twenty minutes in the car, you declared an insult to Namjoon who was on the phone at the time.
You immediately retracted silently and blinked repeatedly. Even as he extended his arm at you, you were cautious at the receptionist who was there waiting on her work station, standing up at Namjoon’s wave--that indicates he needed a paper and pen. You stood next to him as he listens attentively to the caller. When he hangs up, he scribbled a few more words that made no sense to you. “Babe, I think our trip is going to drag a bit longer since someone will be expecting to meet me in an hour,” he underlines a name twice and the receptionist bowed to you while Namjoon used his keycard to gain access inside the staff-only area. You saw that the place had large lounges.
“Can I expect an exclusive building tour with my husband?” you gave a pair of hopeful eyes and he was honestly so whipped for you, that it took very little for him to abide by your request. He had always wanted to offer you a tour of his new studio. Since he had been actively requesting several rooms and units in this new building to be made under his orders.
Staff lounges. Game room. Pantry. Everything is sleekly designed, with modern vibes. High ceiling and good lighting.
“This is where Taehyung sometimes lives, the game room,” Namjoon used his keycard to gain access to the exclusive room. “Where the recording studios at?” you wondered and Namjoon’s face switches into a goofy smile. He pointed his thumb to the hallway behind him, “This way, ma’am…” he walked sideways in order to continue looking at you.
The studio was everything you imagined and more. The intricated equipment on display, the recording booth. Your lips parted slightly in a wide smile, at awe of the place your husband spent most of his time in. This is where Namjoon regularly works in. He’d be sitting in one of these chairs, monitoring the recording session with high fidelity headphones around his head. You imagine him being all serious with his music and your heart flutter like a schoolgirl having a crush on a bad boy down the alley she wasn’t supposed to fall in love with. Namjoon pulls a chair out and sat at the same time you did. You couldn’t stop scanning the whole room with sparkling eyes. You never thought you would see it in real life. You’ve heard many songs recorded in this very room and you couldn’t help being absolutely awestruck.
“Where do you sit?” you asked him.
“Right in that seat, you’re sitting in, recording engineer. BangPD sits here and Pdogg hyung, on that chair, usually,” he pointed to the long couch in the room.
You rested your elbow on the armrest, your chin on the heel of your palm, spinning softly in the chair that belonged to him. “Look how far you’ve come… this is. This is amazing, you’re amazing, you know that baby?” you gave him a glance, pursing your lips and returned your attention to the setting of the studio. Namjoon appeared bashful and you didn’t have to look at him to know that he’s turning red. “I’ve always wondered about your early days...how you began. How you bravely chose a path none of the people in your shoes would. You go against the wishes of your folks, and take the storm head first,” you paused, speaking with a little shake of your head, and, “Why are you so goddamn brave? What triggered you? Who was Namjoon before he is Namjoon? Do you know how much hazards there is for boys your age to embark on a hiphop journey? Drugs? Prostitution?... missing classes? The horror your parents must have faced, you naughty boy.”
Namjoon covered the upper part of his face, hiding his laugh right after, giggling. “I wasn’t a naughty boy…” he said.
“Sure you are.”
“Am not, I promise…” he rested both of his elbows on his knees, thigh widespread as he sat facing you. The view of the studio as the background from your side, “I just remember wanting something so much that my inside feels like it’s ripping if I ever abandon it. I knew, I just knew that I want to be a musician, no matter how difficult it was going to be, or whom I may lost on the way...even if it means, myself. It’s not just hiphop to me, I found family, a brotherhood, a pact, a passion I couldn’t find anywhere else…”
You mirrored his actions, and touched the tips of his fingers with yours, lacing and unlacing them, “You’re capable of everything. That’s what your teacher told you.”
“Yes, I was capable of a lot of things… but none of it appealed to me. I could bow under the demands of conventional educational system, do what I do without an ounce of soul in my power--forever wondering if this was the life I truly wanted, knowing that I’m good at something else…it was very difficult to tell my father, especially,” Namjoon reminisce, his eyes dropped to the floor as the pain clearly never left his mind.
“You were starved for days, and stood at a corner within a circle as a punishment,” you spoke in place of him. He drops his head and then nodding. His pocket money was taken away. He had curfew. His family did everything they can to prevent Namjoon from seeing his brothers from the hiphop scene. He skipped classes while simultaneously doing well in his studies despite pouring his entire passion into music instead of his school books. The boy who sleeps in the back of the class from attending rap battle almost never failed any of his quizzes and exams. His treaty with his parents was as follow: if I manage to maintain a good score in classes, you’ll let me do music.
You cupped his chin in response to his silence, and made him stare into your eyes, “I, am proud of what you were, what you are and what you’ll become… and my love may not be enough to fill the holes you have in you, all the flaws you thought you have, and shortcomings that you’re afraid of showing… but I will always have your back, through thick and thin,” you granted him a chaste kiss on his lips, making a squeaking sound, “Even if we ever end up divorcing.” You smiled against his ear lobe. “If I ever made you think about divorcing me, you can rightfully pull me by the dick and I’ll make you want me again,” he commented.
“Can I go in there?” you pointed to the booth.
“Absolutely,” Namjoon shot.
He watched you skipped towards the entrance of the recording booth with a fond smile. The speaker buzzed on, and the green light above turns on while the white tile outside the studio indicating, “In Session” lights up, simultaneously.
He lowers his mouth to the microphone, and pressed the intercom button before he speaks. “There’s a headphone on the neck of the tall stool if you put it on you’ll hear my voice better… without the echo,” he watched you put on the very headphone and you gave him a gleeful thumbs up like a kid putting on a fire suit at the fire station tour. Such an excited little baby, Namjoon thought.
He increases the receiving volume and told you that the microphone in the recording booth is up and ready to receive any sound and that you could say anything you want.
“Nice tits,” you bit your smile and pointed to him while drawing a heart shape with your index fingers. Namjoon gave you a fool in love grin, with a dumbfounded chuckle. Of all the things you could have said, you settled on that. This is what he loved about you. The fact that you could be tastefully affectionate, riddled with deep conversations he truly enjoys--at one point, and be an idiot, the next. It’s true what they say, that the union ripens with time like a fine wine. The longer you were together, the more you’re helplessly in love with one another. The secrets to the everlasting marriage? Consistently hitting on each other to no end.
Namjoon had to leave for the meeting. He is monitoring a recording session in the studio next door and at first, you were there to watch him work. But after a while, you felt like you haven’t finished exploring the entire building. As he stood by the chair of the sound engineer-in-charge, you tugged on his sleeve to have him leaning down so you could whisper in his ear. He nodded in return, crossing his arm, putting on his work mode as he straightens up. You grabbed your purse from the black long couch to leave the studio in a hurry and grinning excitedly all the while. Before you leave, Namjoon reminded you to, “Be careful. Keep your phone on at all times…”
Not long after you stepped out the studio, Namjoon tutted his tongue, shoving his hand to the back pocket of his jeans for his keycard, before rushing out the same door. His keycard at the end of the lanyard dangling meters away from the floor. You spun around at the call of your pet name and sped back to him. He had his lower half of the body inside the studio still, wanting to make sure you get access to all the rooms in this buildings. You kissed his chin and put the lanyard around your neck, turning away. Namjoon watched you enter the lift and you waved back at him enthusiastically. He is very much enamored by his wife.
You’ve always wanted to know what it’s like to be in their wardrobe area. Most of the attires are owned by the company, and the stylist sometimes designs clothes that would suit them.
“No, I want my Gucci’s here today!” You heard a fairly familiar voice, coming from the hidden halls of the large space intended for clothes’ only. “Taehyung?” you guessed. The pretty boy came out from the dividers as if he walked out of a magazine shoot. Pink tinted glasses, flowery printed dress shirt with striking yellow trousers. Wrist decorated with multiple bangles and rings on fingers. Once he locked his eyes with you, he puts away his phone immediately. The person on them was still talking. He taps the ‘end call’ button and you blinked at him.
“Mrs. Kim Namjoon…” he recalled, letting on some sleazy drawl at the end of it. His expression was nothing at all polite.
“Who’s day did you ruin with that abrupt end call, Taehyung…” it wasn’t a question, just a mild reality-check for the fantasy-stricken boy who sometimes needs to be called out.
Taehyung visibly shrinks twice in size as he plopped on the couch next to you.
“...what’s bothering you sweetie?” you rubbed his back, joining him.
Taehyung took some time to reveal what’s on the inside, but that’s just typical Taehyung. He’s a little-guarded soul with glittering fences. Let’s so few in, but entranced all others. How could he not, with his handsome good looks and honey-dripped voice. He wanted to become a good lyricist, just like Namjoon is. You could tell their work apart because even though Namjoon’s work is poetic, Taehyung prefers to fall into the beauty of imagery as well as metaphors. Taehyung has a vivid imaginations a fellow artist and writers share, but he describes it differently.
“Retail therapy isn’t a thing, is it, noona?” he added an awkward chuckle at the end of it, laced with the bitterness of a lonely soul.
“It is only a thing when you do have money,” you replied honestly, and from the sparkles, in his eyes, as he beamed at you, you knew he appreciated the sincerity.
“I’m trying to write a love song, but it had been sitting on my desk for about a week now… I kept trying to imagine a situation of being in love, but I’ve never been in it, so how will I write something I know nothing about…” his shoulders dropped as he sighed out the words, “I kept getting dissatisfied with the imagery I come up with, feeling that it’s not enough or too much… Namjoon hyung won’t have these problems, would he?”
You propped your elbow to rest on your knee, chin on the heel of your palm. Your wedding ring sparkling under the light of the hall. Nose scrunch as you showed disagreement on Taehyung’s accusations. Your eyes shot to the corner of the room along with a click of the tongue.
“Namjoon has a different approach on solving writer’s block. Yours happen to be retail therapy, and Namjoon, well Namjoon, sometimes he reads a comic book.”
“Namjoon hyung has you. I have no one…”
“That’s not true! Sometimes when we both deal with something difficult, we don’t talk about it to each other from the get-go, and that’s one of the flaws in our marriage that we’re still working on,” you paused and inhaled, “Being in love and staying in love are two different things… love is flawed. It’s nothing perfect. Listen, about your songwriting… Have you consulted anyone about it?”
“I’m consulting you…” Taehyung goofs, “But literally I’ve spoken to everyone including Yoongi hyung about it, but nothing helps.”
“Your efforts will pay off, buddy,” you patted his forearms twice, “...maybe you’re too focused on it and it has stopped you from viewing in another perspective.”
“You guys talk back each other a lot, even in front of us, is it really like that back at home when no one sees?” Taehyung asked, and you could see from his face that he was a little amused.
“Sometimes, I mean… Namjoon and I, we don’t hide anything from anyone. What you see is what you get. If I don’t like something he’s doing, I’ll call him out on it. Vice versa. We tease each other to no end, if that’s what you’re asking…” you shrugged.
“Do you guys ever fight, like really fight…” he mirrored your movements, clawing his chin, as he scratches the stubbles under his jaw.
“Definitely...Definitely,” you stressed on the second time you said it.
He’s stubborn, you’re stubborn. You want things to go your way, he wants things to go his. You’re all about managing finance, and he’s all about spending it. He wants a house outside the country and you want one close to home. You talk about priorities and often questions his. Emotional, spiritually, physically.
“Things will change when we have children, I promise you,” Namjoon once said. The way he laid it out so frankly, didn’t convince you one bit. This conversation has occurred once too many time and you’re starting to feel that the marriage you built on this foundation is beginning to brittle underneath the weight of his fame and responsibility. “I hope so…” you said in a whisper, barely believing what you said.
“I guess in marriage there is a lot of tolerance and understanding? Because when we think about the things that we did in order to build this relationship as strong as it is, makes you want to keep it that way, even through the occasional ‘earthquake’ and ‘mudslides’... He got options, I got options, but we’re here now, and that’s all that matter isn’t it?”
His lower lip protruded out, as he was thrown deep in thoughts. The common understanding is that love and marriage co-exists, but the longer a couple stays together, the more their friendship is put to the test. That’s why it’s important to befriend your partner before falling in love with them. At least, when the love ends, the friendship remains.
You excused yourself for wanting to see the rest of the building before Namjoon comes back and wanted to go home. It’s not every day you could roam around the most famous building in the country, home to many famous producers and their studios. This is basically your version of Disney World. This is where the magic happens. Seokjin once took a picture of the building rooftop garden and ever since you saw it, you’ve always wanted to take a look at the views from up there. It was as breathtaking as you expected.
The blue cloudless sky is turning to orange zest, floating in the air as the sun descends to indicate the day is almost ending. You’ve been here all day.
“It will take two minutes, he says,” you spoke to yourself, “It won’t be long, he says.” You carefully leaned your elbows on the wooden rails to watch the busy streets downstairs. All the red light and the white light decorating the traffic underneath you. Busy people everywhere. All rushing to go home to their loved ones, finding food and winding down after a hectic day. Namjoon never gets to spend that. He never was the one for a 9 to 5 job, because to him, inspiration can strike him anytime. There was this one that he stopped in the middle of eating because he had an idea on how to change the beat after the chorus belonging to a track. Or this one time he sat in bed, stripped down after a steamy lovemaking session because he knows what verse to write. You’re still salty about that.
Not because he started working right away. But because he doesn’t give himself a time to be just Kim Namjoon, the Kim Namjoon that has a wife and a normal life. Is this what he’s going to be when he has a kid, later?
We’ve spoken about kids before. We spoke about that a lot.
“I guess in marriage there’s a lot of tolerance and understanding…” your own voice piqued your thoughts as you rode the waves of reminiscing.
From Namjoon’s point of view, he understood that you too had given up so much for his work. You were patiently waiting at home, dutifully understood your responsibility as a wife, the homemaker, and he knows what troubling thoughts you might had had whenever he’s away. Just the same as he is.
As he works, as he tries to tirelessly be present in this studio where he stands, you are always in the back of his mind. And things don’t change even if he’s out of the country, performing, lecturing, educating, analyzing, designing. He ensured that you get calls from him, texts from him, pictures of what he’s doing and where he was. Always making sure you feel safe despite the distance. Because he saw how little you thought of yourself because he saw how your smile faltered when he spoke to his stylist, because he caught the hesitance in your voice when you feel slightly inferiored. He understood all the thing you didn’t have to say out loud. Because it’s hard to be in love when you’re two continents away.
“Because hey, you’re the famous one between us two,” Yeonjun spoke through the microphone. He got the pronunciations clear and in pitch. Namjoon slammed the stop button and tapped the pad of his index finger on his chin. “Alright, go home. We got it,” Donghyuk--also known as Supreme Boi; managed the recording with little hiccups. Yeonjun skips outside, beaming because it had been a long day for him as well. Namjoon gave him a shoulder squeeze and acknowledged his skills. Donghyuk carefully wraps up while noticing that Namjoon had plunged into exhaustion onto the black couch. “You gotta go thank your wife for that line, bro,” he gushed. Namjoon shuts his eyes and laid the back of his head on his wrist. “I’ll tell her that…” he drifts. Donghyuk spins his chair to face Namjoon, and tilted his head to one side, “I thought you said you came here with your wife?”
Namjoon rolls off the couch and dashed out the door at once. He tried to call her but she was on the phone with someone else. He walked past the pantry, past the lounge, past the wardrobe hall--but she was nowhere to be found. She’s not in the cafeteria too.
Namjoon headed back to his studio and there you were.
Sleeping on your side, on his black couch, curled in a ball. Koya the koala plushie in your arms, you don’t even use the armrest as your pillow. Namjoon slowly shut the door, making as little sound as possible, and knelt next to you. Wonders in his eyes, his dimples shallow and his lips curved into a small gentle smile. Softly, he tucked your baby hair behind your ear and thumbed your cheek. He ghosted his lips over the skin just above your eyebrow and shut his eyes as he stamped a kiss on them. You didn’t even stir, you must be really tired. He hooks his finger on a drawer underneath his work desk and took out the blanket you knitted for him to use on his nights away from home and spread them on you so you could stay warm.
With the lights dimmed to perfection, Namjoon manages to move you on top of him. “We have to head home…” he whispered. And it your dazed state, you said, “I am home.” Your nails scratching the thin fabric of his shirt, as you nuzzled your face into his chest where your ears are pressed against the soft thuds of his heartbeat.
“Home is wherever Namjoon is.”
And whenever he isn’t around, you’re homesick. He placed his palm over the back of your head, and slide it down your spine and then up again. With a soft exhale, he shuts his eyes and held you tighter--in the comfort of his studio, Rkive.
“So…” he begins, flickering eyes towards the on-going streets and then to you, who was driving beside him, “There’s no chance I’m going to get the footage you had been earnestly recording, right?”
“Correct,” you shot. The car radio plays rather dimly, in the background, just as preferred. You had a feeling that Namjoon will exercise his rights as a husband or as he’d like to call it, your non-negotiable life partner to gain his portions of the videos you made for his own selfish pleasure, so you attempt to hide the smile that was itching to get out, because right here, is where he lay out his arguments.
“You know, I’m the one that came up with Jungkook’s nickname ‘the golden maknae’...right?” he slowly shifts in his seat, covering his philtrum with his index finger, panning the view outside the moving car. “Known fact for someone who had been supporting you for a while, yes…” you quirked, in an elegant tone of someone who has the upper hand of the situation.
“Don’t you ever wonder if I were to give you a nickname, what it will be?”
“...no, not really.”
“A dictator.”
“You’re just picking fights with me because you know you won’t get your hands on the videos. Are you seriously going to call me a dictator because I didn’t give you what you want? Did it ever occur to you that you don’t deserve the footage?”
Namjoon lands his palm over the expanse of your clothed thigh, a very possessive gesture that you’ve grown numb to. “Let’s negotiate…”
“Negotiate what…? All the negotiation is not up for discussion.”
“I can make your footages a lot spicier.”
‘I like them sweet and bland; unlike your corrupted mind.”
He smirked, “Do you? Do you…?”
“Siri, play Do You by RM.” And just like that, his smirk is gone. There’s no changing your mind, is there? Namjoon has to be a tad more creative. But he liked the challenge.
That’s why the moment he stepped into the apartment, his eyes darkens and his lips turned into a Cheshire grin.
