#incorrect bellamort

[incorrectbellamort]

Voldemort: Your husband glared at me again.

Bellatrix: Ignore him, he's being sensitive.

Rodolphus: I found love poems under your pillow written in Parseltongue.

Bellatrix: Sensitive.

[asktheheirofslytherin]

i give you: https://incorrectbellamort.tumblr.com/post/666152881824612352/voldemort-what-did-you-do-with-snapes

Yes, that is pretty much how that conversation happened.

[incorrectbellamort]

Bellatrix: My husband said I shouldn't come here anymore.

Voldemort: And yet here you are...on my lap.

Bellatrix: I'm such a bad wife.

Voldemort, smirking: No. You're a good Death Eater.

[incorrectbellamort]

Bellatrix: Can you keep a secret?

Voldemort: Do you know anything about my life?

Bellatrix: No, I do not. Good point.

[incorrectbellamort]

Bellatrix: So are we flirting right now?

Voldemort: I LITERALLY HAVE A CRUCIATUS ON YOU

Bellatrix: That doesn’t answer my question

[incorrectbellamort]

Voldemort: You know, not every problem can be solved with a knife.

Bellatrix: That's why I carry two!

[incorrectbellamort]

Voldemort: I relate to Belle because she likes to read books.

Bellatrix: I relate to Tinkerbell because she needs attention OR SHE DIES!

Voldemort: And they call me the dramatic one...

[incorrectbellamort]

Voldemort: *goes to hug Bellatrix*

Bellatrix: *awkwardly hugs back* What is happening…?

Rodolphus: See? When I try that, she hits me!

Bellatrix: I do not!

Rodolphus: *goes to hug Bellatrix*

Bellatrix: *smacks Rodolphus* Don’t touch me.

Rodolphus: See?