May have done a bad thing ✨
Aka I'm posting an angst headcanon I wrote in a discord server awhile ago here. I haven't read Trials of Apollo yet, so I have NO idea if this is touched upon but let me present to you:
Leos afraid of large fires.
At first he thought he was fine. Yeah, he kind of went out in a fiery blaze of glory, but he was okay. Festus revived him and he woke up on Calypso's Island of all places. Because of the fire, he was able to save this awesome, funny, smart chick from a curse she shouldn't have had to bear.
The fire, in a wild, poetic twist of fate, took something he loved, but gave him love. Leo thought that was it. He thought that, after everything was said and done, he was back to being Leo Valdez- the guy who could set himself ablaze and fix things.
That quickly changed after the first nightmare.
It was like the ones he used to have about his mom. There was smoke and heat everywhere, small whips of fire clinging to everything around it like it needed to be touching something to stay ignited. He couldn't move. He couldn't breathe. The difference between these sets of nightmares and the ones about his mom was how much he could see.
The ones about his mom- those were always back in the workshop. He was always small, and Gaea's stupid, dirt face was always somewhere.
These nightmares- they a different breed of evil. He could never move in them. He could feel the fire- and he wasn't supposed to feel fire- as it roared against his skin. His lungs filled with smoke, and no matter how much he tossed and turned it felt like he was gasping for air that wasn't there. The ball of flame that was surrounding him wouldn't let go.
Leo thought it was just a bad trip. Sometimes he had "normal", non-demigod related nightmares. He was right about that, but wrong about the cause. The first time he the campfire at camp roar to life since he got back, his body started shaking. It screamed Get out, leave. Run. Leo didn't know why. He was fire proof, right? He was used to fires. This should've been fine why wasn't it fine? Leo couldn't stop starring at the fire and freaking out. He remembered the sound of the onager firing and the seething pain
That night he left the campfire early.
On his own he tried to get over it- starting some moderately sized flames and trying to get himself to walk through them. His legs felt like concrete every time. His mouth was dry. Leo Valdez, the Son of Hephaestus who was blessed was the power of fire, couldn't deal with fire.
He hangs out by the campfire when he has to- for example, pick up Hazel. It was bright and easy to find. But, he's always uneasy. He can still make small flames dance across his skin with ease, but anything bigger than a standard sized garbage can and he starts to freak. Leo hates how he freaks like that. He should be fine but he isn't fine, and he hates the weakness to no end.
Leo's a firm believer in there being a fix for everything. The catch with this problem is he's not sure if he has the right tools for the job.
