A/N: ahh I’m nervous posting this cause it is vulnerable. It’s not perfect because I have a full time job and limited time to record and edit so please be nice. I think as I go on I’m getting better. I also noticed how freaking repetitive I am with writing but I didn’t change it lol. I’m going to post links along with edited Authors notes and warnings. Let me know if you want to be tagged
Main Masterlist | Series Masterlist | Playlist
YouTube Playlist
Fic Summary: You hadn’t spoken in years. Technically, you had the ability to, though as the years wore on, you weren’t so sure. You’d settled in Jackson over a year ago and now it was Fall again. You are drawn towards Ellie and her ‘not-dad’, but you had always assumed any relationships deeper than surface level were beyond you at this point.
Pairing: Joel Miller x nonbinary!Reader/OC (afab, dimples, has multiple nicknames but none are their name) no use of y/n
Series Warnings: In-depth discussion of SA that was done to the main character (not by Joel) and the mental impact it has. Blood and Injury. Eventual Smut. Weed and alcohol use. MINORS DNI!
Chapter 1 Audio
Read it here
Chapter Summary: As fall fully starts, you make new connections in Jackson.
Chapter Warnings: Slight reference to general depression and anxiety? misgendering. Reference to weed use.
Chapter 2 Audio
Read it here
Chapter Summary: You grow closer to Ellie and go on patrol with a new extra set of hands.
Chapter Warnings: Mild violence. Slight reference to general depression and anxiety. Misgendering a bit/wrong name being used.
Chapter 3 Audio
Read it here
Chapter Summary: Patrol takes a turn for the worse.
Chapter Warnings: Canon typical violence. Blood and injury. Reference to weed.
Chapter 4 Audio
Read it here
Chapter Summary: Waking up with injuries makes you realize the strength of your community.
Chapter Warnings: Talk of injuries. Concussion recovery.
Chapter 5 Audio
Read it here
Chapter Summary: Recent events lull you back to old memories.
Chapter Warnings: Talk of past pregnancy and loved ones. Concussion recovery. Brief reference to weed.
A/N: I got a request about Jackson getting married and having a family and it gave me an excuse to write this little scenario.
Jackson was, and had always been, an incredibly hard worker, this was something you knew when you agreed to date him. There were times you'd be left home alone while he worked, and when you had then got engaged you didn't expect this to change. However, as your relationship had grown more and more serious you were being invited to more work events with him. After you married, you were essentially a full-time wife. Jackson had urged you to quit your job in favour of travelling the word with him. What you hadn't expected was for him to announce he was taking a hiatus from music when you found out you were expecting your daughter, Ellie.
Very quickly his world came to revolve around the tiny human the two of you had made together. He couldn't stop himself writing music and did manage to come up with a whole new albums worth of material inspired by his girls, but he kept his work close to home. By the time he was ready to tour again, your baby was a walking, talking toddler and the two of you were going along with him.
You had your doubts at first, thinking that touring with his family was going to be difficult or distracting, but Jackson made it work. You would normally take Ellie exploring, letting her see the world and learn new things, until one day, Jackson approached you with a different plan.
So, that evening you found yourself side of stage with Ellie in your arms, a pair of large yellow headphones to block the sound. With a good luck kiss from each of you, Jackson took to the stage.
There was something strange about seeing him perform again. You hadn't watched him since finding out you were pregnant, so being there again, with your daughter in your arms felt really special. You had worried she would be bored or wouldn't react well, but she was thoroughly engrossed in watching her father perform.
At a break in the set list, Jackson grabbed his handheld mic and addressed the audience. "Now, you guys won't know this, but tonight is a really special show for me, as there is someone here I'd like to introduce you to."
He quickly ran to the side of the stage to where you were. "Can I take her?" he asked you.
"If she wants you to," you replied. You knew full well that Jackson's Instagram was full of the two of you, so it's not like she was a secret.
"You wanna come with Daddy, angel?" he asked, holding his arms out. She very happily leaned towards him and you passed her over.
"Everyone," he said back into his mic. "This is my very special guest tonight, Ellie Wang. Ellie, do you want to say hi?"
He held the mic in front of her and she leant in towards it. "Hi!" she said happily with a little wave.
You heard some cheers and coos from the audience.
"Good girl," Jackson said, placing a kiss on her cheek. "This is the first time Ellie has been to one of my shows, so I'm super excited to have her here. Are you having fun?" he added looking back to her.
"Yeah, I'm with Mummy," she told the mic in front of her, sounding delighted by the whole thing.
"Do you wanna go back to her?" he asked, but she shook her head before burying her face in his shoulder.
He chuckled and continued to talk to the crowd while bouncing her, asking if they followed him on Instagram and telling little stories behind some of his photos.
"Ok," he said eventually, "Daddy needs to sing again, so it's time to go back to Mummy. Can you say goodbye to all my friends here?"
This time there were no words from her, but she did continue to wave until they reached you again.
Jackson had the biggest grin on his face as he passed Ellie back you. "I love you, girls."
"We love you too, now get back out there," you told him, before urging your daughter to clap for him as he went back.
As if you weren't already proud enough of your husband, watching the way he so seamlessly slid from dad, to husband, to performer, you knew that this was going to work. He could be 'Jackson Wang from China' and your family man.
i’m being so brave about not being a little shit and just picking “the”. i’m gonna go with laugh
You can always be a little shit with me lol. This is from Ellie's second day of school in Jackson:
Ellie flipped through her book, getting pulled into the world of superpowers and dramatic speeches from bad guys.
Sometimes a rise of laughter would come from Jesse’s group across the room. Their hands flew as they spoke, smiles wide and bright across their faces.
My Idol is a South Korean competitive reality dating game show. It currently airs on Saturday nights on Jae-bummer’s blog. First broadcast in 2016, the show offers the opportunity for a lucky fan to go on seven blind dates with seven idols. The idol plans the date with the show throwing in a specific mission to complete during the day. At the end of the initial dates, the show opens up an audience vote to decide what four idols will move on to the second date.
My Idol 3: The Series
.
Looking up moodily at your night shift body guard, you waited in silence for him to open your room.
"No hello?" Insu teased, tilting his head. "How was your day? I've missed you terribly?"
"Hello, Insu," you grumbled, crossing your arms. "How was your day? I have missed you terribly."
"Well," he clucked. "It doesn't sound genuine when I have to prompt you."
"Can I please just go inside?" you whined, rubbing your forehead to ease the oncoming headache.
"Sure," he nodded. Letting the tension ease from your shoulders, you took a deep breath in an attempt to calm your nerves. "But it'll cost you."
"I have a sneaking suspicion that you're not talking about money," you groaned.
"Not at all," he smiled easily. "Money's worthless. You're time, however, is valuable."
"What do you want?"
"Grab your ice bucket," he said gently. "Let's go for a walk."
"I don't want to go for a walk," you pouted. "I've walked enough today. And ridden a bike. And fallen off that bike. And then thought my date died."
Insu nodded politely. "I think you need to decompress."
"I'm perfectly capable of decompressing in the comfort of my bed," you muttered.
"Where you can thought spiral through every hypothetical way you could have reacted on your date?" he smirked. "Perfect idea. Have a great night!"
"You're a little too perceptive for your own good," you grumbled. "Has anyone ever told you that before?"
"I read people for a living, Y/N," sighed. "You're just one of the lucky ones I like."
"I don't see why," you lamented, not proud of yourself, but searching for solace nonetheless. "I'm a walking disaster."
"Hardly," he said, tapping your room key against the door. Shouldering it open, he waited for you to pass him and go in. "Now come on. I'll even give you five minutes for a bathroom break before I expect to see you back out here."
Sliding into your room, you glanced at him over your shoulder. "How charitable."
After spending at least ten minutes sat on the sink, totally not thought spiraling, Insu's fourth round of knocking finally pushed you to hop off the counter. Snagging the ice bucket from beside you, you shuffled back toward the door and yanked it open. Chewing on your lip, you narrowed your eyes at the dastardly man.
"That was much longer than five minutes."
"Should've come in after me," you sighed, breezing past him. "What if I had passed out on the toilet? Some body guard you are."
"I'm here to protect you from other people," he chuckled. "Not from yourself."
"Comforting," you deadpanned. "I'll remember that the next time I feel faint."
The two of you walked down the hallway in companionable silence for a moment, giving you time to let your eyes wander from door to door. You were curious who was hidden where and if they were all comfortable with the current arrangements. Now you had three men, three celebrities, locked up for what could be weeks. They'd be missing crucial schedules, studio time, and dance practices...all because of you.
"You have no control over what fans do," Insu said quietly, seeming to have read your mind.
"Get out of my head," you huffed, glaring over your shoulder at him.
"I don't have to be in your head to know you're going through it," he hummed. "I can tell by your body language."
"Please, enlighten me," you sighed, coming to a halt and spinning toward him. "What is my body saying?"
You tried to ignore the up and down assessment he gave you.
"Your shoulders are tense," he noted. "You're either chewing on your lip or the inside of your cheek at any give time. Your arms are wrapped so tightly around the ice bucket, you-"
"Okay, okay," you accepted. "Apparently my body is talkative. I get it."
Turning back around, you started your trek again.
"I'm here to listen," Insu prompted from behind you. "If you want to talk about it."
"There's nothing to talk about," you alleged. "Plus I'm sure Hyuk gave you the full report."
"I did have to set three of his fingers," Insu confessed. "But he didn't get into specifics."
Whirling around again, your eyes were wide. "He didn't go to the hospital?"
"Not if he can avoid it," he smirked. "It's kind of the nature of the business."
"Great," you gasped, throwing your hands in the air, ice bucket included. "So I've been the cause for two people's physical injuries, my apartment being torn apart, AND everyone being held up in hotel rooms like some kind of fancy prison."
"Hey," Insu said quietly, taking slow steps to close the distance between the two of you. You hadn't noticed it previously, but you were breathing heavily and tears may or may not have started to escape your eyes.
Placing his hands lightly on your shoulders, he slid his fingers carefully down to your elbows and then back up again. "You're not responsible for any of that."
"I am," you whined. You were on the brink of becoming a blubbering mess. "I'm the unlikable one. Fans don't like me. That's why all of this is happening. I'm supposed to be better. I'm supposed to be more deserving."
"Come here," Insu said gruffly, pulling you against him. Wrapping his arms around your shoulders, he placed a hand gently on the back of your head. "With the fan-bases these guys have, no one will ever be good enough. It's not personal."
"They made it personal," you squeaked into his suit. While you weren't proud of your breakdown, you were enjoying the unexpected safety Insu provided. "They took away everything."
"They didn't," he insisted. "They can't take away how you react to the situation, and you've been doing well. Better than anyone can expect, really."
Pulling away from him, you caught Insu's eyes. "Why are you being so sweet?"
"I can't comfort a friend in need?" he smiled, patting your head absently before stepping back.
"We're friends?" you chirped, quietly pleased by this development.
"I guess we are," Insu hummed, seeming surprised by his own words.
You smiled softly at him, allowing this new, bubbly feeling to float through you. If not watched carefully, you knew it could be dangerous, and you already had enough boy-related problems on your hands.
"Y/N?" a familiar voice questioned from behind you.
Turning around, you couldn't help but feel the moment between you and Insu had been snuffed out. You were only mildly horrified with yourself as you felt a slight disappointment at another person joining the conversation until you realized who it was.
"Jungkook!" you grinned. It took everything in you not to greet him with a big hug.
He seemed to have no qualms though.
"Y/N!" he breathed, an easy smile filling his face. Crossing the hallway, he pulled you in for a hug. Wrapping his arms around your waist, he tucked you into his frame, enveloping you in warmth.
"It's so good to see you," he whispered into your hair.
"It's good to see you too," you sighed, leaning back to get a better look at him, but remaining in his arms. He looked as handsome as ever.
Clearing his throat behind you, Insu made his presence abundantly clear.
Stepping away from Jungkook, you felt heat creep up your neck. You glanced behind Jungkook, his won bodyguard giving an awkward wave.
"Sorry," Jungkook winced, nodding briefly to Insu. Focusing on you again, he grinned. "How are you?"
"I've been better," you admitted. "I'm hoping they filled you in when they moved you here?"
"A little bit," he grimaced. "Y/N, I am so sorry. I can't believe anyone would do that, let alone someone who would call themselves a fan of any of us."
"They killed my fish," you blurted, not realizing how much that thought burdened you.
"What?" he gasped, his eyes growing wide. He pulled you in for another hug. "You've been through so much."
"Y/N," Insu grunted behind you. "It's best we get going."
"Right," you nodded, stepping away from Jungkook. If the producers saw the two of you fraternizing in the hallway, it likely wouldn't go over well.
"I'm glad I saw you," Jungkook nodded, eyes bright. "Even if it was only for a minute."
You smirked before glancing to your feet. "I didn't get to ask, but you're doing okay?"
"I'm doing great," he chimed. "I've gotten more sleep than I have in years. And three meals a day! Can you even imagine?"
You let out an unexpected laugh. "That's a relief to hear. I'm glad you're resting well."
"So are the other guys," he nodded, somehow knowing that would comfort you. "Just to clarify. We're all taking this in stride."
"You've talked to them?" you asked, tilting your head.
"Hongseok and I get meals together downstairs sometimes," he said, an idea lighting up his expression. "You should meet with us!"
"Y/N," Insu cautioned. His quiet reminder that you've dallied too long.
"We should," you agreed before squeezing his bicep lightly. "I'll see you soon, okay?"
"Okay," Jungkook hummed, giving the cutest nose scrunch.
Taking a deep breath, you continued down the hallway past him, willing yourself not to look back. You hadn't realized how reassuring his presence would be. He was the only one who hadn't really been privy to the nightmare this experience had become, so it was such a relief to touch base. Plus he confirmed that he and Hongseok were doing just fine. You hoped he would begin including San in their shared meals as well.
Walking into the ice room in a bit of a daze, it took you a moment to realize how quiet Insu was being.
Turning to look at him as you filled your bucket, you were surprised when he didn't make eye contact. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," he said shortly.
"Apparently not," you chuckled nervously, feeling his mood change rolling off him in waves.
"We wasted too much time," he muttered. "We could've both gotten in trouble."
"It was just a quick conversation," you reasoned. "It wasn't really a big deal."
"Every minute you are outside of the safety of your room is a big deal," he said, glaring.
"Whoa," you winced, tucking your now full ice bucket back under your arm. "Down, tiger."
"I'm not going to endanger you just so some celebrity can get in his five minutes," he grumbled, looking anywhere but at you. "I'm sure that little stunt added quite the points in his favor."
"Insu," you whispered, recoiling from him as if you had been slapped. "Jungkook isn't like that."
"Right," he scoffed, turning around and leading you back into the hall.
Normally you walked in front of your body guard, but this time, he was stomping in front of you.
What was his issue?
Was he...jealous?
"Someone got really grumpy, rather quickly," you muttered, arriving at your door. Stepping in your way, Insu glared down at you.
"Just watch yourself, okay?" he said sternly. "These guys sell a fantasy every day. They're good at it."
"Heaven forbid someone genuinely likes me," you huffed.
"I didn't say they couldn't," he shot back. "All I'm saying is-"
"Yeah, yeah," you groaned. "Poor little Y/N, manipulated by the heart throb. I get it."
"Y/N," he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "That's not what I'm saying at all."
"Then come out with it!" you gasped. This day had been far too long and complicated for your liking. You were ready to hide under your blankets and never come out.
"I care about your well being!" he burst, his hands curling into fists as he let them drop to his sides. "I don't want to see you hurt!"
You chewed on his comment for a moment, watching as he continued to stare at you, frustration painted across his handsome face. "Why, Insu?"
"I told you earlier, I like you, Y/N," he struggled. "You don't want to see people you favor falling into situations where they're not watching out for themselves."
"You said you couldn't protect me from myself," you said quietly. "Remember?"
Insu let out a small grunt. "Stubborn."
"Exhausted," you corrected. "Thoroughly done. Burned out. Let me into my room."
Smacking your room's key card against the keypad, Insu backed into door. Keeping it open wide as you walked past, you could feel his eyes boring into you from behind.
"Goodnight," you huffed.
Without saying a word, he stepped into the hallway, closing the door softly behind him.
..
Your next date wasn't until the following evening, giving you plenty of time to stew in your disaster of a date, the situation with Insu, and the small rendezvous with Jungkook. Saying you were confused and irritable was an understatement.
You were already in the thick of things with three different idols and had four more to go. You couldn't go throwing Insu into the situation when your heart and mind were completely disoriented. You had never navigated anything quite this intense in your life.
Jungkook had pure intentions, of that you were sure. That's why Insu's outburst had shaken you so much. He didn't know anything about these guys, and it was clear in the way he was acting. That being said, you couldn't help that it had sewed the smallest seed of doubt in your mind. He was right, idols were well-versed in giving the illusion of attainability. Surely they weren't putting on an act just to win the competition...were they? The cameras weren't even around when you had bumped into Jungkook. He had no reason to be so caring if that were the case.
"Damnit, Insu," you hissed, knowing this would dwell in the back of your head. How dare he open that door when you were already feeling like you were going crazy.
Lost in thought, you yanked open the door of your hotel room right after you heard a knock. Hyuk had dropped you off for makeup and hair not long ago with the promise of your date starting soon. It was going to be a formal evening, so you were dressed exceptionally well (at least to your own standards). Shimmying out your shoulders, you tried to focus on the task at hand. You would have fun tonight, even if it killed you.
Glancing up from your uncomfortable shoes, you were taking aback at seeing Insu again so quickly.
"What are you doing here?" you croaked, unintentionally sounding annoyed by his mere presence.
Insu's eyebrows shot up. "This is an evening date. Am I not your night shift bodyguard?"
Right. Somehow it had completely evaded you that he would be the one escorting you this evening.
"Perfect," you muttered, shaking your head. This was just great.
Barging your way around him, you started down the hall, trying to calm your anxiety. It was hard enough jumping into another blind date, let alone with your moody body guard in tow.
Stepping into the elevator, you scooted as far away from him as you could. Maybe it was a bit immature, but you were emotionally frazzled before you had even blown up at each other last night. It was to be expected that you were still a little bit raw.
Punching at the button for the lobby, Insu became a statue beside you. Remaining quiet, it wasn't until the end of the elevator ride that he finally spoke up. "You look beautiful."
"Thanks," you managed, not allowing for his kind words to melt the ice that had frozen around you.
"Y/N," he sighed, turning slightly toward you. "Surely you can understand where I was coming from-"
"Doubling down is not the optimal move here," you grumbled, holding up a hand in the air between you. "I'm trying to get into a good mental space to handle this date. I really don't want to talk about last night."
"Can we talk later?" he asked, tilting his head.
"No."
"Y/N-"
"I'll think about it," you groaned. "Okay? Just give me some space for tonight."
Giving a curt nod, Insu stepped back into his position beside you.
It wasn't long before the elevator doors slid open, exposing you to the commotion that was the hotel lobby. Taking a deep breath, you stepped from the small space. Furrowing your brows, you were surprised to see a handsome man, dressed in a full suit in front of you. The cameras were on and waiting for your arrival.
"Wow," his surprisingly gravely voice purred. Reaching out to take your hand, he smiled. "You must be Y/N."
"I am," you said cautiously.
"I'm Got7's Jackson," he smiled. "And you are absolutely gorgeous."
You tried to ignore the sharp intake of breath from behind you.
Summary: When Y/N starts working as a personal assistant for the director of TEAM WANG DESIGN: Jackson Wang himself, she finds it hard to hide her secret. After all, she used to be a massive stan of her boss! But she's not the only one holding back...
Warnings: Swearing, degradation, sir kink, namecalling, masturbation, obsessive!Jackson, dirty talk, corruption kink?, praising, sexual fantasies, fingering, posessive!Jackson, grinding/humping by both parties, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, use of sex toys, lots of teasing, orgasm denial, breeding/impreg kink?, WILL ADD MORE AS STORY ADVANCES, PLEASE LMK IF I MISSED ANY
Your heart was pounding in your chest.
Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion.
Your legs felt heavy with each step.
Who could've thought?
Who would've dreamed?
Surely not you.
When your friends dared you to apply for the job as the personal assistant of Mr. Wang himself from Team Wang Design, who would've thought you'd actually be selected? You, just a plain young woman, fresh out from college.
You remembered vividly sitting there in the waiting room, surrounded by some of the prettiest girls you had ever seen in your life. You had been nervous before going there, but when you had sat there, surrounded by a bunch of women all probably much more capable than you were, you had somehow calmed down. Why would you be nervous anyway? It's not like you would get the job, as you had just replied to it as a dare. No, they definitely wouldn't pick you.
Except...
They did.
You had dropped your phone when they gave you the call, shattering the screen. But you didn't care. At first, you thought it was one of your friends pranking you. But after being assured several times and receiving the e-mail with the briefing, there was no way out. You HAD to believe it.
Team Wang Design had hired you as the personal assistant to Mr. Wang.
Of course, your friends had teased you about it. Threatening to show the company your old posters of their directed that you used to hang up in your dorm room above your bed. Because like most adolescent girls you had been head over heels with Jackson Wang. How could you not? An idol with the looks, the voice, the moves, and the talent. There wasn't a girl in your college who did not admire him. Though you had to admit that none of them had fangirled over him as hard as you used to.
Of course, those days were behind you. You had grown, and your obsessive fawning over the man had made way for real-life troubles and concerns that were more important.
However, being hired now, as his PERSONAL assistant. Yeah, your head was absolutely spinning.
There was no way you wouldn't screw it up. Wouldn't make a stupid mistake that would make you lose your job instantly.
But you didn't care.
Even if you would only get about an hour of working for the man you were once dreaming of every night, you would be able to die happily.
Your hand reached for the door and you noticed your fist was shaking. You took one last breath, ready to meet your downfall, and knocked.
A husky voice, one you only knew too well answered for you to come in. You opened the door and got into the room.
Sitting behind his desk, his eyes scanning one of the many designs that were laying there, was the man you once called the love of your life.
He looked up at you and your mind went blank.
His eyes were like dark pools of black night sky. His high defined cheekbones complimented his sharp jawline. His thick black eyebrows were slightly creased as he looked at you, his defined and soft looking lips slightly parted and relaxed. Then your eyes met.
Once again, you were under his spell.
--------
Jackson's POV
A soft knock sounded on the door.
'Come in,' I replied mindlesly. Someone came in but I paid them no mind. The drawings of the new designs were scattered on my desk. They were good but not great. Nor was the line coherent. After countless editing rounds, this was they came up with?
I sighed. This would only give me a headache.
Simply to have something else to do than staring at the disappointing designs I looked up. There was a girl standing in front of me. For a moment I wanted to ask her how she had gotten in here, as I had no idea who she was, but then I really saw her. She was wearing a suit from one of our older lines. It looked quite new for it's age. She had probably not worn it very often. Her heels were clearly new, offbrand but still expensive looking. But her hands gave her away. Her nails were slightly busted and too short. Clearly she was a biter. There were small scars and scratches here and there too and no rings nor bracelets. Her hair looked soft and had been done up with a hairclip in a simple way, and her face...
A weird feeling came over me.
I had seen so many models in my career is a designer, one even prettier than the next. Flawless skins, perfect teeth.
But this girl.
She was certainly far from perfect, face and body. But somehow, she was captivating. An unequalled beauty in her own league. And her eyes...
Her eyes seemed to be sparkling. Never had I seen such a vibrant look in anyones eyes. A fire, full of stars and joy. Desire and fierceness, and so alive...
I wanted to protect her. Needed to protect her. Needed her close to me. Needed her to touch me...
'Good morning,' I said the words without realising it.
'Good morning Mr. Wang,' the girl said. Even her voice sounded somehow magical. It was calm, but I could see her fingers twitching. Clearly she was nervous.
'My name is Y/N and I will be your new personal assistant,' she continued.
My jaws clenched together automatically.
My new personal assistant...
I could see the innocence in her eyes. The uncertainty of my acceptance of her.
warnings: lying, fluff, oral (f receiving), slight orgasm denial, sort of nipple play (reader on self), unprotected sex, knotting, sort of awful sex I'm sorry jackson, angsty ending, and lmk if i am missing anything!
note: so this is the prologue to a series I am writing!! i hope you all really like it! I actually decided today it fits as more of a prologue than a chapter one, so :p please enjoy and maybe give me feedback idk also i know the smut in it sucks i'm sorry
You often found yourself in the library during the day, studying and doing homework or taking a break and watching anime. You had been sitting there for an hour or so, and it was starting to get busy. It always did around midterms and finals; you were just glad you found your own small table to sit at.
You were working on a paper when someone came up, smiling a bit awkwardly. “Hey, would you mind if I sit here? I’ll be quiet, I promise,” He says, hesitating to sit down. He had an accent that you couldn’t quite place, as it only happened with some words.
When you finish the sentence you were typing and look up, you do your best to hide your surprise at how handsome he was. He was absolutely stunning, making you question your own appearance. “Oh, um, sure,” you say, your cheeks flushing with heat as you make room for him.
“I’m Jackson, by the way,” He says as he pulls out the chair and sits, getting himself comfortable across from you.
“I’m Y/N,” you respond, still blushing.
“It’s nice to meet you,” he says, offering a charming smile as he pulls out his laptop.
The next week at the same time, he showed up again and asked, “Y/N, is it alright if I join you?”
You nod, a shy smile finding its way onto your face. “What are you studying?” you eventually ask him, tilting your head slightly.
“Business,” Jackson says, glancing up at you with a smile. “Actually, it’s my masters and I’m focusing on international business. What about you?”
When you tell him, he listens intently and asks polite questions- the right ones, too. Not the usual ones you always get.
The next week you’re running late and stop at the vending machine to grab your favorite candy. Going to your usual table, you do a double take when someone is already there. You pause awkwardly, only to realize it was Jackson waiting there with a second cup of coffee.
“Oh, hey Jackson,” you say, blushing as you join him.
He smiles at you, pushing one of the cups towards you. “I got you a coffee, just the way you like it.”
You suspiciously tilt your head, taking a sip, only to be surprised that it was the way you liked your coffee. “How did you know?” you laugh, getting out your laptop.
“I know some of the workers,” he sheepishly admits. You laugh and open the candy, offering him some.
“I shouldn’t, I’m on a diet,” he says with a pout.
“Oh, come on,” you scoff, raising an eyebrow.
He playfully rolls his eyes before grabbing a piece.
Soon, every Tuesday you would meet up with Jackson in the library. Before midterms, it became every Tuesday and Thursday until finals, when it was almost every day. It was on one of these Thursdays that he asked you, “Are you free tomorrow?”
You tilt your head, wondering what he was getting to. He seemed to always have plans on Fridays during your normal study time, and you tried not to study too late since the library closed early. “Uh, no, I don’t think so? Why do you ask?” you respond.
“Well, I was thinking that I could take you for a date! If you wanted to, that is…”
You could tell he was a little nervous, and you realized you were staring at him blankly. You let out an embarrassed laugh, nodding. “Yes, sorry, I was just… yes, I would like that,” you admit, shaking your head some.
“Great! I can pick you up after your class tomorrow? Just make sure you dress warm!” he says with a grin.
“You already have a plan? What is it? Tell me~?” you ask, pouting a little bit.
“Nope, it’s a secret!” he laughs, smiling brightly. “You have to wait until tomorrow to know!”
The next day, you woke up early to get ready. You wore warm clothes like he said, and did your makeup cutely but not excessively, especially since it seemed like you would be outside. In class, you were extra fidgety and kept checking the clock. It felt like time slowed, but you knew it was from your anticipation.
Right on cue as class ended, your phone vibrated. Checking it, you noticed a text from Jackson saying he was outside the building.
You all but run out of the classroom down to the parking lot, finding him standing outside grinning.
“Will you tell me what we are doing now?” you ask, giving him your puppy dog eyes.
“Maybe,” he teases, leading you to his car. He opens the door for you and even shuts it, getting in on the other side. “Does hiking sound okay? Then takeout and a movie at my place?” Jackson asks. You see a hopeful glint and the worry in his eyes, and your smile grows.
“That sounds wonderful!” you tell him.
“Great!” he says, starting to drive. “You’ll love it! I go here quite often, and it’s very pretty. I’ve seen some deer and some really neat birds before there.”
“Oh, really? Do you know what kinds of birds?” you ask, curious.
“Well, I’m not sure since they’re not the same as back home, but definitely some owls! I went out later than I should have. And I don’t know if it was a falcon, eagle, or hawk. But those too.”
“I think we have all three here,” you laugh.
“Well, that really doesn’t help identify it any, now does it,” he laughs with you.
“Not in the slightest,” you giggle.
“Well I guess if we see them, maybe you’ll know,” Jackson says, turning onto a gravel road.
“What am I, a bird expert now?” you laugh more.
“No, you’re just a native here,” he responds with a little pout.
“Still not a bird expert,” you point out.
“I know, but you will know better than me,” he reasons.
“Maybe, maybe not,” you say, shaking your head as he parks in a small parking lot.
“We are here!” Jackson says, turning off the car. He leads you over to the map by the trail entrance, glancing at it once before heading down.
“We’ll follow the blue markers this time,” he says, pointing them out on the tree.
“What do they mean? You didn’t give me time to read the map,” you say with a huff.
“They mean we’re going the correct way,” he tells you smartly.
“That’s not what I meant and you know it!”
“I know. And there’s nothing you can do about it but follow me and find out,” he teases you, taking your hand and leading you.
You’re both careful not to trip over any of the roots or loose rocks, and you start getting glances of white.
“Is that a river?” you ask, glancing at what looked like ice.
“Uh, maybe,” Jackson responded in an unbelievable manner. Of course he knew, he just wasn’t going to tell you.
Eventually, you made it to more of a clearing. Jackson didn’t even have to point to what it was he wanted to show you. You stood in awe instead.
Winter was definitely there, and you knew that since the little fountains on campus were frozen over. But this, this was a sight to behold. The entire river had frozen over, and what must usually be a gorgeous waterfall had frozen over. The water had frozen against the rocks, sharp spears of it dangerously hanging from the main body of water. You swore if the sun was just right, you could see some of the water on the very inside running down inside the thick, frozen ice.
“Isn’t it beautiful?” Jackson asks you, his voice hushed. All you could do was nod.
The next Tuesday, you got to the library first. “Want to go on a second date?” you bluntly ask him when he joins you.
He laughs before smiling, nodding. “Of course, I’d love to,” Jackson assures you.
You’re not sure if you can ever end up choosing a favorite date by the time finals end. Your last “date” was taking him to the airport. He was going home for the break, and you wanted to take him.
“I guess this is as far as we can go, huh?” you ask sadly, looking at the security checkpoint.
“Yeah, I’m sorry, Y/N,” Jackson says, fidgeting with his ticket as if he were nervous.
“Well, I’m sure everything will go well…” you say, almost more nervous than he was. “I mean, you’ve flown lots of times before, so this shouldn’t be any different…” you start to ramble in an attempt to console him.
He chuckles a little, gently putting his hand on your shoulder before tilting up your chin.
“Y/N, will you be my girlfriend?” Jackson softly asks, his dark eyes meeting yours.
Your heart leaped in your chest. You thought of him as your boyfriend, but you weren’t sure if you were official or not, so it made you a little nervous. But at his question, your lips smiled on their own, and you nod as much as you can for his hand holding onto your chin. “Yes!” you whisper.
“Can I kiss you?” he asks, causing you to blush and nod. Once given consent, he kisses you sweetly.
“I promise I’ll be back soon, okay?” Jackson says as he pulls away and picks up his things.
“Alright… be safe,” you tell him, feeling your cheeks burn.
“I will,” he assures you, kissing your cheek before leaving.
A few days later, when he was over jet lag, you face timed him. You were eating breakfast at the time, and he was eating dinner.
“How are you?” You ask, happy to see him again and hear his voice.
“I’m doing much better now that I get to see my beautiful girlfriend~” he coos playfully, causing you to laugh.
“Okay, okay. How was the plane trip? How are things going back home?” you ask, wanting more details.
“It went well, don’t worry. I am home safe, although it is a bit hectic at times,” he assures you.
“Why is it hectic? You’re on a break~ you need to relax!” you tell him with a huff.
“I know, I know, don’t worry, I am,” he again assures you.
“You better be,” you huff back, pouting slightly.
Just like that, your library dates were replaced with virtual ones. Some days you could only talk for a few minutes, some days you went on for hours. Every now and then, he even would sing you to sleep. You always slept well when he would.
When the holidays came, he ended up sending you a cd of songs he recorded to help you sleep.
When the semester started up again, you would meet in the library Mondays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays this time. You sat at the same table, but also flirted more when you studied. You made sure to keep up your grades, since they were incredibly important to you.
After the initial start up hump of the beginning of the semester, you started to remember something strange about Jackson that you had forgotten or just hadn’t had the time to realize before. It wasn’t quite a gut feeling of danger, but a feeling of something was wrong. He would get sick nearly every month for a few days without fail. In the last week of January, Jackson was out sick for over a week.
The following Monday, Jackson comes back to the library, and you immediately perk up. “Jackson, how are you feeling? Your roommate told me you were sick,” you ask him.
“I was, but I am feeling much better now,” he assures you, smiling.
You felt a tug in your stomach, and you knew he was lying. “Jackson, you get sick more often than… well, anyone I know. What’s wrong?” you insist.
He sighs, his smile faltering. “I have an immune disorder. I don’t like talking about it much, but I often get sick,” he tells you.
So, you believed him.
You believed him until your introductory anatomy course went over autoimmune disorders. He didn’t fit any of the basic descriptions for them. You ended up choosing to do a paper on the topic, so you ended up pressuring him more when he was at your place for a movie date night.
“Jackson, I’ve been working on a paper for autoimmune disorders. I may have to narrow it down to one in particular… So, I was wondering what one you had?” you ask him, wanting to be a supportive girlfriend.
He sighs and seems irritated about it, and you couldn’t quite tell what was wrong. “I’m sorry, Y/N. I just… I feel like I can’t tell you…” he admits, shocking you.
You felt like you had told him everything. You told him about your asthma, how your therapy sessions went, what you wanted to improve on, your insecurities about your body, even sexual things you had thought about eventually exploring with him.
But he couldn’t tell you this? After you told him about your mental health issues? You were shocked and speechless.
After a moment, you finally catch your thoughts. “Jackson… you know you can tell me anything, right?” you say softly, frowning and not realizing you were tearing up.
Jackson’s face softens, and he pulls you into a hug, rubbing your back. “I’m sorry, I know. You’re right,” he soothes, sighing slightly. “I just… don’t want you to hate me or think I am a freak or anything,” he further admits.
“Jackson, I love you. I could never,” you whisper. It was the first time you had said that.
His heart melts at your words, and he started tearing up. You pull away, and he cups your cheeks.
He lets out a short sigh, making up his mind. “Alright baby. Well, I’ll just say it,” he tells you, now opting to hold your hands. Jackson gently squeezes them as he admits, “I’m a werewolf.”
You pause, staring at him as you replay his words in your mind. You then pull away and laugh, shaking your head. “No, seriously Jackson,” you say, feeling anxious. Why would he lie to you?
“I am being serious,” he sighs, running a hand through his hair.
“Then-then prove it,” you say, but it comes out as more of a question.
Jackson sighs softly, tilting his head some. “Alright. Count to ten and come into your room,” he says, going in.
You huff, counting out loud.
“One.”
“Two.”
“Three.”
“Four.”
“Five.”
You stand up and head towards your room.
“Six.”
“Seven.”
“Eight.”
“Nine.”
“Ten.”
You turn the doorknob and say, “I’m coming in now.”
You open the door and are immediately greeted with a massive wolf. Oddly enough, he had the eyes of Jackson.
You quickly shut your door, knowing you weren’t allowed to have pets in your building.
“Um…” you begin, staring at him in confusion. You look around the room, wondering where Jackson was, only to notice his clothes on the floor. “So, you’re really-?” you begin, looking at the wolf again.
He nods and you groan, covering your face with your hands.
You hear him jump off the bed, and after hearing snapping and popping, you glance up and see Jackson pulling his pants back on. You quickly look away, your cheeks heating up as you try not to stare at his well defined body.
“Told you so,” he murmurs, smirking because he knew.
"Well this is rather awkward. What immune disorder do I choose to write about now?" You say with a laugh.
"Sorry babe. Let's go watch that movie now, yeah?" He suggests, taking your hand and leading you back to the living room.
After learning about werewolves, Jackson would take you on hiking dates. Sometimes he would run around as a wolf, and other times you would ride him like a horse, which was probably ridiculous to look at, if anyone ever saw you. But he liked to show off.
After finals, you stayed with him for a week. You weren't ready to go home yet, but you already had to move out of the dorm you were staying in.
You were cuddling with him and watching a movie. You felt your insides burn with anxiety, having been wanting to tell him something for a while, but too embarrassed to say. See, once you admitted you were a virgin, Jackson took things very slowly with you. You enjoyed giving him blowjobs after he taught you about how he would knot, and the furthest he went on you was giving you oral once.
But now you felt ready to progress your relationship further, but you didn't know how to say it.
"Jackson," you say, feeling your cheeks heating up.
"Yes, baby?" He says, looking at you. He knew something was up and you needed to tell him something, but he honestly had no idea what it would be.
"I… think I'm ready," you admit, nibbling your lip.
"Ready for what?" He asks, raising an eyebrow in confusion.
"Having sex," you bashfully admit.
"Oh," he says, surprised. "Right now?" He asks, trying not to sound too eager.
You shake your head. "No, not right now. But soon," you assure him, feeling embarrassed.
"Well, I don't mind waiting a little longer," he assures you, kissing the top of your head.
One minute you were grinding on Jackson, making out on the couch. The next, you and Jackson were both naked in bed. He lays you down, hovering over you as he kisses you.
“Jackson, can I give you a blowjob?”
“Don’t worry about making me feel good. I want to eat you out,” he says, pulling away from you and spreading your legs.
“Yes please,” you say, nodding softly.
He kisses your thighs, teasing you by biting and marking them. He knew this made you needy, as your thighs were sensitive. Jackson eventually kisses your clit, causing you to moan. He smirks as he licks your folds, maintaining eye contact as you blush.
“We’ve done this how many times? And you always get so bashful,” Jackson gently teases, quickly going to work.
He sucks your clitoris, his tongue flicking it as your juices leak out and onto his chin. Your hand grabs his hair, tugging as you moan. Jackson uses his strong arms to keep your legs open. He notices your hole clenching around nothing, boosting his ego.
Jackson inserts a finger, curling it up against your g spot, which causes you to cry out his name.
“You’re doing so good for me,” he whispers against your folds, pausing his kisses to your mound as he adds a second finger, working on stretching you out.
“Feels so good,” you whine, gasping as he adds a third finger. “I’m close,” you pant, reaching down to rub your clit. Jackson stops you and pulls out his fingers with a smirk.
“Jackson?!” you gasp, pouting that he took away your orgasm.
“I want to cum with you,” he explains, smiling sweetly.
You sigh and lay your head back down, nodding.
“Are you sure you don’t want to use condoms?” Jackson checks, raising an eyebrow.
“Positive. You said yourself I wasn’t fertile,” you admit, blushing some.
“Alright,” he says, teasing your folds with his tip. Jackson watches as your hole clenches around nothing, desperately wanting his cock.
“Please Jackson,” you huff, not liking how he began to rub his cock against your folds.
“I’m getting myself lubricated,” Jackson smugly responds, grinding into you, tapping his cock against your swollen bud.
“Fuck~” you cry, pulling your hair. “Please Jackson, I want to have sex with you,” you beg, tearing up in need.
“Hmm, alright,” Jackson says, slowly sliding his tip inside of you. He grabs your hands and kisses you, letting you adjust to his girth. He slowly slides in, huffing into your ear softly.
“Jackson, please move,” you beg once he bottoms out.
“Yes ma’am,” he teases you, starting with slow thrusts. Jackson greedily watches your breasts bounce with each thrust, a near-feral grin finding its way on his face.
“Faster, please,” you murmur, doing your best to keep your eyes open as you squeeze his hands.
He readily obliges, and you groan as the sound of skin slapping skin fills the room with both of your moans.
“I’m not gonna last that long,” he admits with a laugh.
You nod and he lets go of one of your hands, rubbing your clit. You grab your breast and pinch your nipples, stimulating yourself as you near your high.
He suddenly begins to cum with a loud groan of your name, his thrusts harder than before. You cry out in pleasure, which soon turns into a whimper as he begins to knot you.
“You’re doing so well, Y/N, you’re doing so good,” Jackson begins to praise. It takes all of his strength not to collapse on top of you, but he manages to nuzzle into your neck and kiss your sweet spot there.
You groan softly, brushing your damp hair out of your eyes. “I love you,” you say, smiling tiredly.
“I love you too.”
You wake up the next day naked and alone in bed. You look around, wondering where Jackson went. “Jackson?” you softly call, looking for him.
But something about his apartment was… off.
You carefully get up, your legs feeling a bit weak, and go use the bathroom. His toothbrush and razor were missing.
You go out into the kitchen and living room, and still no Jackson.
When you go back into the bedroom, you notice that his phone was missing. You open the closet and his dresser, and there were no clothes.
I’ll be the phoenix, leave it to me, we be flying, spread your wings behind your back, they call us phoenix, ride or die, ride or die...
summary : the clock is ticking as you recount your passionate affair with Jackson, the most wanted man in Shanghai, to the people trying desperately to catch him, but no one - including you - knows if he will risk his life to save yours.
warnings : strong profanity, explicit dialogue, mentions of blood and violence, references to drug and alcohol use, graphic sexual content, self-destructive themes, potentially triggering elements involving kidnapping, arson, etc.
miniseries chapters : one / two / three / four / five / six / seven
Hour seven of captivity had come and gone. Leaning against the cold wall, you peered through the small slit of a window at the rain steadily pouring, streaming down the glass. Arms folded tightly across your chest, you heaved a sigh.
As much as you resisted, your mind drifted to Jackson. Where was he? Was he thinking of a plan to help you escape? Or was he cutting his losses and going underground?
You fell into memory after memory, trying to put the pieces together. Of only one thing you were assured - your feelings for Jackson were very real. They were all-encompassing.
Love, you told yourself with a shake of your head. Just admit it. You’re in love with him, but that doesn’t mean he’s in love with you.
Being with Jackson came with many risks and you blindly accepted them all. You were an addict in love with your high, desperate for a fix whenever you could take one. You ignored the danger, ignored how vulnerable you made yourself to be with him.
Now, you were paying for it.
Jinyoung twirled the pen between his fingers, eyes on your back. Thus far, you had been quite forthcoming and that made him suspicious. It implied you were steering his attention. There was a chance you were feeding him only what you wanted him to know or what you had been instructed to divulge.
He would have to press you, see if he could make you slip up. There was something he needed to know. He needed you to think your value was minimal, though it was anything but. His presence in this damned tiny box was two-fold like a double-edged sword.
“When did he show you his fire?”
You could catch the faintest glimpse of your own reflection in the glass. After a pause, where you pondered whether or not to answer, you replied, “Our first night together.”
“Romantic,” Jinyoung retorted dryly.
“Honest,” you countered, eyes narrowing.
Jackson had always been honest. It was part of the fabric that made him who he was. And yet another trait that made you reckless with abandon in your feelings for him.
“You are a hopelessly genuine person in a horribly fake world,” you once told him.
That night, he had shown you every part of him, down to each corner of his soul, and his fire had been no exception. You had taken him inside you, let him have you in every way possible. Never had you been so intimate, more than any other man that came before him.
Something was different - the gravity between you and Jackson.
You had been on your back with Jackson buried between your legs when his irises turned redder than the fires of Hell itself. You lay there enraptured, wondering if you had just given yourself to the Devil incarnate.
Jackson had seen the awe on your face and the glistening in your eyes, relieved to see no sign of terror or even horror. And he rewarded you by moving deep within you again, smoother than silk. You moaned his name for all to hear and arched your body to meet him.
You didn’t question the crimson of his eyes then. Not when he brought you to ecstasy over and over. You cried out no man’s name the way you did Jackson’s and by how intensely he made love to you, he knew that too.
The night was endless. He licked and sucked every inch of you, especially at the apex of your thighs. You raked your nails through his hair as he unraveled you yet again with his mouth, kneading your hips in his broad hands.
Between rounds, you kissed up his spine, tracing your fingers over the Phoenix inked in his back. The firebird stared back at you, undaunted in its flames, and you marveled the intricacy of its wings and the fierceness of its eyes.
Then, the moment you recovered some of your energy, Jackson was on you again, impaling you on his hard length and making the headboard slam loudly against the wall.
For a night you were tangled with him in every sense of the word. When you slipped out from under the sheets to catch your breath, he dragged you back under. He was insatiable, unquenchable, and your body sang for him and obeyed his every command.
But morning came and the haze of lust was pushed away by clarity. You inevitably had to confront who - or what - the man was that had taken you to bed.
You sat in the window of the hotel suite and looked out at the city of Paris in its early morning glory, clad only in a sheet wrapped snugly around your torso. The sun shone warmly across your skin and you basked in the light of dawn. Every inch of you ached, but it was a soreness you would long for when it faded.
Jackson fastened his pants and came behind you, hands gliding across your hips. His breath was hot on your neck, his lips tickling your ear. His voice was low and tender when he asked, “Will you tell me what’s on your mind?”
You shook your head in reluctance.
“I need to know,” he insisted, wrapping his arms around your waist like a snare. “Are you afraid of me now?”
The only fear was his. You could hear it in his words. He was scared you would leave him.
Jackson clambered onto the windowsill to join you, molding himself to your back. You watched his legs stretch on the outside of yours. His arms were taut around you. He wanted no space between you and him.
“Baby…,” he started again. Your silence was killing him.
“What are you?” you asked quietly. “Is it magic? How can you…”
“I…,” Jackson sighed in defeat. “I can’t tell you.”
You lowered your head. That was exactly what you had expected him to say.
“I’m not a hero,” he whispered darkly, lips gracing the top of your shoulder, desperate for a taste of your skin again.
With a roll of your eyes, you grumbled, “I was never looking for a hero, Jackson.”
Jackson cupped your jaw, turning your head until you had no choice but to meet his eyes. “I will never hurt you,” he vowed firmly.
“I know that.”
Jackson leaned his forehead against yours and asked, “Then, for now, can that be enough?”
Of course, it could. You knew you were head over heels, even though you had yet to voice it. The night of passion only solidified your feelings for him.
You reached for his hand on your waist and brought it forward, running your fingers over his knuckles, tracing the lines of his palm. You met his eyes again and whispered, “Show me.”
Jackson didn’t hesitate to let fire gather in his hand. You gazed into the flames, watching them flicker as they never strayed from his palm. You could feel the heat on your skin.
“One day, tell me,” you said, lingering your attention on the bold red of his irises.
Jackson nodded and nuzzled your cheek before burying his face in the crook of your neck. “One day, I’ll have to.”
Jinyoung watched you from his seat, eyes drifting to your hand where you spun the ring on your finger as you recounted the memory. Jackson had shown you his fire, but told you nothing of its origin. Jinyoung was vaguely impressed and caught off guard. Jackson wasn’t known for his restraint.
Returning from your reverie, you finally ambled away from the window, taking the seat across from Jinyoung again. You felt emotional, longing for Jackson in the pit of your chest.
We can’t end this way, you thought to yourself sadly.
You stiffened, deciding to deflect. Having the spotlight on you so intently was beginning to burn. Glancing at the notes Jinyoung had scribbled on his pad, you spoke levelly, “Tell me about yourself, Jinyoung.”
Jinyoung stopped mid-word in his writing and looked up at you through hair falling in his eyes. His voice came out rough, laden with skepticism. “And why would you want to know anything about me?”
You scoffed, feeling your request was perfectly reasonable. “I’m telling you the most intimate parts of my life,” you explained, perturbed. “I know what you’re after and I’m trying to be a good little captive. Indulge me.”
Jinyoung stayed gruff and droned, “I have a role to play. Same as you.”
You were annoyed that he wouldn’t give an inch, despite how cooperative you had been. “And why do you have such a hard on for my man?”
Jinyoung took your remark in stride and answered coolly, “I’ve been assigned to him for many years. It’s my job to know what he does, when and where he does it.”
You leaned back in your chair and folded your arms in defiance. “Then, why do you need me to find him? Shouldn’t you have some idea by now?”
Jinyoung almost ran out of patience. He met your eyes and glared back.
I need you to draw him out. I need to see just how far he’s willing to go to have you. We need to know if you’re a problem or a threat.
At his silence, you nodded in realization. “I’m the bait.”
“Perhaps,” said Jinyoung with a shrug. “We don’t know yet if you’re the queen or just another one of his many pawns.”
That stung, but you did well in hiding it.
Jinyoung sensed you were wounded and leapt at the opportunity to play on your hesitation. He set down his pen, laced his fingers together, and questioned, “What if I told you what he is?”
“I know what he is,” you replied without missing a beat.
Jinyoung snorted, disdainful. “You don’t even know the half of it.”
You were quick to smart, “I know he’s an animal in the bedroom and a gentleman everywhere else. Beyond that, I don’t give a shit.”
Bristling, Jinyoung snapped, “Do you really think you’re going to be rewarded for this level of blind loyalty?”
You said nothing. His raised voice unnerved you.
Jinyoung pressed, “He knows you’re in here and he has done nothing to get you out.”
Your lip quivered and your response was weak, lacking conviction, “He’s biding his time.”
Jinyoung softened his tone, negotiating, “If you start telling me how I can find him - how I can catch him - I can make sure you have full immunity. You can walk away from this.”
You shook your head and answered truthfully, “I don’t know where to find him. He made sure I never knew.”
Jinyoung clenched his fists, calming his irritation. It did him no favors in losing his patience with you, but he was on a deadline. He felt a vibration in his lap and peeked down at his phone, opening a new text that read, He called it off.
Having lost his attention and quite fed up with being interrogated, you rose and moved back to the window. You had tried to play along as Jackson had taught you, but you were running low on energy and denial. You could feel yourself shutting down, doubt trickling inside you like the raindrops streaming down the window.
Jinyoung rubbed a finger across his lips and lingered his gaze on your figure. He could see what Jackson saw in you. You carried fire of a different kind, but you could match his fervor. Maybe Jackson had finally found someone to live in the flames and chaos at his side.
Perhaps you weren’t the pawn after all.
Your mind drifted again. Thoughts of Jackson were all that could console you.
Jackson stared vacantly into the distance. You giggled and combed your fingers through his hair, trying to make the strands lay flat from their current disheveled positions.
“I can’t believe you talked me into that,” he groaned, face pale.
You giggled. “I thought you said you were an adrenaline junkie?”
“That was before I…,” Jackson trailed, puffing out his cheeks like he may empty his stomach at any moment. “Rode that evil thing.”
The rollercoaster had certainly given your brave and tough boyfriend a run for his money. You had never heard such a high-pitched wail leave his mouth like that before. It went without saying you spent the entire time laughing at his misfortune.
“You did well,” you crooned, smoothing down the last patch of hair sticking upright.
Jackson grabbed the glass of water before the waitress could set it down on the table before him and retorted, “I did it because you said you would show me your boobs.”
You chortled, leaning against his arm, and teased, “Like you haven’t seen them a million times already.”
Jackson clocked a glance at your cleavage and murmured, “I like the twins a lot.”
You laughed again. “You know, you’re the first significant other that hasn’t made me cover them up when we’re out in public.”
“My ego and self-esteem aren’t that fickle.”
You snuggled up closer to him and purred in his ear, “That’s because you’re an alpha male.”
Jackson swept an arm around you, tucking you even closer to him, and whispered, “Am I?”
You grinned.
The waitress appeared with plates in hand, breaking the spell.
The sight of Jackson grubbing always put a smile on your face. He devoured his burger and you struggled to keep up. It was a full time job wiping his lips and chin with a napkin.
It went without saying you enjoyed fancy Jackson with his candlelit dinners and well-tailored suits, but messy Jackson just stoked your fire differently.
“Jacks, this is so delicious,” you hummed, going in for another bite.
“It’s fucking holy is what it is,” he growled back.
“Mm,” was all you could manage as you stuffed your face.
Now it was Jackson’s turn to take a pause and watch you. Everything you did was attractive to him. It almost made him insane. He licked his lips and flirted, “I love a girl that knows how to eat.”
You wiggled your eyebrows, dunking a curly fry in cheese sauce and plopping it into your mouth. “I love a boy that knows how to talk,” you replied devilishly.
He cocked a brow. “Oh, yeah?”
You smirked.
Jackson draped his arm over the back of your chair, fingers coming to brush up and down your bare arm. He slipped a digit in the strap of your bikini top and let it snap back on your skin. “Don’t bother drying off too much, baby. You’re gonna be wet for hours.”
You batted your lashes, peering up at him coyly. “Come on, Daddy. Don’t you know by now? I stay wet for you.”
Jackson rumbled in his throat, tucking his face against your neck and pressing a kiss or two beneath your ear. “It’s been a long day,” he mused, having thoroughly enjoyed his time with you at the water park. “You sure you can handle me tearing that ass up at the hotel tonight?”
You reached across and grabbed his thigh, making sure he felt the bite of your fingernails, and spoke under your breath, “Bold of you to assume I can wait that long.”
Jackson pulled back, eyes widening and a grin tugging at his lips. “I’m crazy about you. You know that?”
You nuzzled his nose with your own and said, “Kiss me then.”
Jackson never shied away from public displays of affection. And he never did it to assert his territory. He just couldn’t stop kissing you day or night.
Blinking rapidly, you turned from the window and looked at Jinyoung, noticing his eyes had been on you. Your brow furrowed. His gaze was intrusive, like he could read your thoughts, and you bristled. The memories were yours to keep. Some were not meant to be shared.
Something sent shivers up your spine and your chest filled with heat. Stepping back to the table, your words were sharp, “You think I’m a fool.”
Jinyoung deadpanned, “Very much so.”
You lowered into the chair and asked delicately, “Have you ever been in love, Jinyoung?”
Jinyoung narrowed his eyes. The notion alone disgusted him. “I have not.”
You pressed, “Not even once?”
Jinyoung shook his head.
You whispered, almost more so to yourself, “It makes a fool out of all of us.”
Jinyoung believed that. He had seen it firsthand and refused to suffer the same fate. “To the point you would let the world burn for him?”
“Who cares?” you replied with a shrug, trying to appear passive. “The world is already on fire. Haven’t you noticed?”
“Rather selfish of you,” said Jinyoung, condescending. “To put you and your lover above everyone else.”
A fleeting glimpse of a memory flashed across your mind. Of you in Jackson’s lap as you poured over a novel. His hand danced aimlessly across your naked thigh while you read.
“All the gods, all the heavens, all the hells, are within you,” you read aloud.
Jackson opened his eyes, lifting his head from the back of the couch. “I like that,” he murmured, kissing your brow.
“It means we made it all. We created heaven and hell. It’s all a figment of our imagination,” you continued, turning the page.
Jackson watched you in wonder, the concentration on your face. He didn’t have the heart to tell you otherwise and settled for a parting kiss on your cheek before leaning his head back and closing his eyes once more.
The memory and Jinyoung’s words collided and you felt another shiver up your back. “Is Jackson meant to burn the world?”
Jinyoung swallowed, having inadvertently put himself in a precarious position. “You think too highly of him,” he sneered.
“Why shouldn’t I?”
“Pride cometh before the fall,” Jinyoung taunted.
You shook your head and sighed, “I have no pride.”
“Everyone has pride,” Jinyoung said, almost in scolding. “Did you know it’s the sin God hates more than all the others?”
Your brow stitched. He sounded amused. God had never been much of a factor in your life, but you were an avid reader and offered a rebuttal, “You’re wrong. The deepest, lowest circle of Hell is reserved for betrayal.”
Jinyoung leaned back in his chair, smirking for a reason unbeknownst to you. “And you’ll never betray him, will you?”
“Never.”
Jinyoung cocked his head. “Even if he leaves you in here to die?”
“I’m not afraid of dying.”
“What are you afraid of?”
You stared into his face, searching for reason. Would this man ever understand what you and Jackson had?
“Lies,” you finally admitted.
“I’m surprised he chose you,” Jinyoung chuckled. “You seem nearly as defiant as he is. I’m assuming there were plenty of clashes in the relationship?”
“Nothing we couldn’t handle,” you answered in a small voice.
Jackson followed you swiftly from the kitchen to the bedroom, his cheeks were blazing red.
“You knew I had a career when you met me,” you spat, shuddering at the realization you were having your first big fight with Jackson.
“I’m not asking you to give up your career,” he snapped back, reprimanding. “I just expect you to be where you said you would be when you said you would be there!”
You threw up your hands and groaned, “I didn’t do it on purpose!”
Jackson barely let you finish the sentence before he rounded on you. “Are you sure about that? Because you were very punctual up until we started sleeping together.”
“Fuck you, Jackson,” you shouted at him, vitriolic. “You don’t own me!”
Though you stomped back into the living room, trying desperately to avoid him, Jackson was hot on your heels, yelling, “You think I don’t notice how you’re distancing yourself from me? You’re waiting for the other shoe to drop when they’re both still on my fucking feet!”
Deflecting was what you did best, but he was too fiery, too unafraid to call you out. And he could see right through you.
You barked, “I’m late a couple times and that means I’m trying to sabotage the relationship?”
Jackson folded his arms and glared at you venomously. “I said it and you didn’t deny it.”
You shook with wrath, balling your hands into fists. “Take that manipulative bullshit and shove it up your ass! I should have known this would happen.”
Jackson gawked, though the expression of shock quickly devolved into seething rage. “Should have known?” he echoed back at you.
You wavered where you stood.
Jackson loosened his tie before ripping it from his collar entirely and roared, “You think you’re the only one with a temper, huh?”
“Yell at me,” you screamed, planting your feet. “See if I give a shit!"
“I have been nothing but good to you,” said Jackson, leveling a pointed finger at your face. “I still want you just as much as I did when I met you. You’re the one getting cold feet!”
Adrenaline was finally taking its toll. Tears were burning behind your eyes. “Oh my god, fine! Is that what you want to hear? I’m scared to death of how I feel about you. I’m head over fucking heels!”
Jackson calmed only a little when he pressed, “And what? You’ve decided that this relationship is one-sided?”
A tear escaped and rolled down your cheek. You quickly wiped away the evidence with a rough hand and cried, “You’re too good to be true.”
With that, you turned tail and ran, scurrying toward the front door of his apartment.
Jackson watched you go, still etching your words into his mind forever, and called after you, “Where are you going?”
“I’m not crying in front of you, Jackson,” you yelled at the top of your lungs, slamming the door behind you.
Jackson stood there, rooted in place. He closed his eyes and tilted his head back, inhaling a deep, steadying breath.
You couldn’t make it down the hall. You felt like an idiot. Never had you been in so deep and it scared you shitless. Leaning back against the wall just outside his door, you sank to the floor and wrapped your arms around your knees, crying behind them.
Only a moment later, the door opened and Jackson charged out, giving chase. He slid to a stop and sighed heavily at the sight of you.
You didn’t bother to look at him and you weren’t the least surprised when he slipped his arms under yours and hoisted you up. In one all too easy swoop, he lifted you into the air and popped your legs around his waist.
It was your body’s natural reflex to lock your ankles behind his back, to overlap your hands behind his shoulders and to rest your cheek against his neck, hiding your face.
In the bedroom, Jackson leaned his head against yours and whispered, “I’m gonna silence these doubts the best way I know how.”
Jackson unzipped your jacket and stripped you down to your underwear, but before you could register the cold on your bare skin, he pulled one of his white t-shirts over your head.
You whimpered when he pushed you on the bed. The mattress bounced slightly beneath you. On your stomach, you gripped the blanket in your hands and listened to the rapid thumping of your racing heart as he crawled over you.
Jackson pushed the shirt up, just enough to expose your ass, and made room for himself between your legs. He draped himself over you, combing your hair with his fingers until he could press his lips to your neck.
“And I’m gonna break these walls down, brick by fucking brick,” he whispered in your ear.
You lifted your head and your mouth parted wide with a moan when he penetrated you slowly.
“You’re mine,” Jackson growled, biting down on your shoulder.
You turned to Jinyoung and frowned, unshed tears welling in your eyes. In that moment, you realized you were nothing more than a prisoner - someone who had no rights and potentially no chance of salvation.
“If you let me go,” you began softly, almost pleading. “You would follow me right to him. Wouldn’t you?”
Jinyoung’s reply was blunt, cold. “You’re more valuable in here.”
You bit your lip, staving off the tears with every ounce of your strength. “I didn’t even get to say goodbye,” you spoke under your breath.
Jinyoung looked up from the file abruptly, surprised. “Are you leaving him?”
You looked away, staring into nothing, and said, “He’s leaving me.”
“You know that?”
You bobbed your head and muttered, “When I found out loving him was… dangerous, I didn’t stop. I didn’t leave when I had the chance. I decided that he was worth it. I’m culpable in this.”
Jinyoung felt he finally had you on the ropes and came in for the kill. He approached you and you instinctively pressed your back against the wall. His close proximity was unwelcome, intimidating.
“What if I told you he’s planning something big? Something that will set off a chain reaction that could change life as we know it,” Jinyoung began, hushed like he spoke a deadly secret.
“Don’t tell him that,” you grumbled. “He’s arrogant enough as it is.”
Jinyoung’s eyes flickered, incredulous. “Have you always been this cynical?”
There wasn't enough time to explain it to him. “You don’t understand. And you never will.”
Jinyoung braced his hand on the wall beside your head and taunted, “Try me.”
You exhaled loudly and confessed, “All my foolish feelings aside, he taught me how to live again. I had decided my life was no longer worth living and he changed my mind.”
Jinyoung knew he couldn’t argue with that. Jackson had given you something to fight for and that was a powerful thing. After a pause, he sneered, “If I tell you what he really is, you may not feel that way.”
You shrugged, appearing nonchalant, but you knew Jinyoung was pulling at a thread, one that could unravel your seams. You stayed brave and replied, “I only know what he made me feel. What you say will never change that.”
“He’s not human.”
Those words echoed in your mind, like a scream ricocheting off the walls of your metal cell. You stared into Jinyoung’s eyes, trying to understand what was lingering in his gaze, what he had to gain from dismantling you entirely.
“I know that,” you finally revealed.
It wasn’t a hard conclusion to come to, frankly speaking. Jackson’s eyes could turn from lustrous brown to scorching crimson. Fire could appear in his hands. He could vanish without a trace in the blink of an eye.
Of course, he wasn’t human. He was an entity. Beyond that, you knew nothing else.
Jinyoung frowned, his brow stitching. This was a problem.
You breathed easier when he finally moved away from you and watched him give you a glance over before returning to his seat.
Jinyoung scribbled on his notepad and pulled out his phone. Without looking up, he asked blithely, “What if I let you call him?”
The offer made your heart spin in your chest. Hope bubbled up in the well of your body. The mere thought of hearing Jackson’s voice was enough to bring warmth back to your cheeks. But you quickly lowered your voice to a growl and spat, “Why - so you can try to get a trace?”
Jinyoung sent off a text unbeknownst to you and replied, “I want to know if your feelings are one-sided.”
Seated at a table, alone and shrouded in the dark, Jackson felt a vibration in his pocket. He opened his phone and the four words glared at him, setting his body aflame.
She knows too much.
Faster than he thought possible, Jackson leapt to his feet and flipped the table over. It tumbled to the ground, glasses splintering into thousands of shards across the floor.
Meanwhile, the two agents returned to the room under Jinyoung’s watchful gaze. They ushered you back to the table and fastened your cuffs once again to the bolt in the center. All the while, you scowled at Jinyoung.
Jinyoung held your phone in his hand, swiping to Jackson’s number and dialing without a second thought. He was careful of the cables attached to the nearby computer.
Jackson answered on the second ring, speaking through gritted teeth, “To whom am I speaking?”
“Jackson,” you started, chest clenching.
He paused. “Hi, baby.”
You looked between the phone and Jinyoung, and said, “There’s a man here. He’s going to tell me what you are.”
Another pause. This one much longer than the last. Jackson swallowed the lump in his throat and finally told you, “Don’t believe him.”
Your eyes burned. “Am I…,” you hesitated, voice trembling. “Ever going to see you again?”
Jackson could hear the longing, the sadness. He imagined your big, beautiful eyes staring up at him when he held you in his arms. He had taken you for granted and now there was a hole where his heart used to be.
“If not again in this life, then definitely in the next.”
Your lips tugged in the faintest of smiles, comforted. Another memory of Jackson flashed in your mind, a time when he said something similar and you knew he hadn’t given up.
The expression on Jinyoung’s face flipped on a dime. He pulled the phone away, before you could say another word, and jeered, “Hello, Jackson.”
“Jinyoung…,” Jackson started, fire racing up his spine.
“I got you,” Jinyoung laughed, hanging up.
You rose abruptly, jarring the chair beneath you and making your chains rattle. “You bastard!”
“I hope this has all been worth it,” said Jinyoung, gathering his things.
You wanted to dive across the table and claw his eyes out. Anger was filling you from the soles of your feet to the crown of your head, and at any minute you were bound to explode.
“I will never help you hurt him.”
“Too late,” Jinyoung whispered darkly.
You overflowed and resorted to threatening, “I will kill you if you touch him.”
Jinyoung turned to you slowly, not taking the threat in kind. His eyes bore into yours and the single light overhead began to flicker. Suddenly, he reached out and grasped you by the jaw, forcing you to lean toward him over the table.
“Careful,” he whispered with vehemence. “That mouth is going to get you into trouble.”
Fear tickled across your skin. And in that moment, something told you Jinyoung was not what he seemed.
He kept you in his grasp for a few more seconds, simply to assert his dominance, and then released you. You staggered, regaining your balance and bracing both hands on the table to steady yourself.
Jinyoung exited the only door, slamming it shut behind him.
You were left alone with your rage.
Hands shaking, you yanked at the cuffs still anchoring you to the table. No matter how much you pulled, even with every bit of your body weight, the table was nailed to the floor and didn’t budge.
But even if you broke out of your binds, there was only a locked door and a narrow window to freedom.
“Let me out of here,” you screamed at the top of your lungs.
“Put her on lockdown,” Jinyoung told the guard, your shouts muffled by the thick walls. “No one in or out, but me. We can’t let him get her back.”
“Understood, sir.”
“Good,” said Jinyoung, striding away and putting the phone to his lips. “We play our cards right and our boy will be back on track.”
“This damned mortal girl,” replied the man on the other line. “I don’t know what kind of magic is between her thighs, but she bought the world a little more time with it.”
Jinyoung chuckled at that.
“I shifted his focus,” added the caller, at ease. “He’s looking for me now. Do your worst.”
“With pleasure,” Jinyoung retorted, hanging up the phone and sauntering down the hallway.
Jackson stared down at his phone, reading the text from an unknown number over and over again.
You made me do this.
Jackson had lost yet another battle. Though the war was still to be won. He knew the odds were not stacking in his favor, but subverting expectations was his specialty.
He had exposed his own fatal flaw - you. But as much as Jackson wanted you back in his arms, he knew you were safe. He had to keep them convinced you were more valuable alive. They wouldn’t harm a hair on your head, not whilst they needed something from you.
At least, that was what Jackson told himself.
They wanted him angry. They wanted his bloodlust to consume and destroy. It was his purpose and he had abandoned it. You tempered him. Your voice was saccharine, like aloe smoothed on a burn.
The seed was planted. Jackson could be steered by any chain around your neck. It was a risky move, what he had done. By making them think you were leverage, you were safe for the moment, but the time would come when they would try to use you against him for the same reason.
Jackson knew if he made one wrong move he would lose you forever.
“He’s here,” said the driver, making his boss jolt.
“Finally,” Jackson groaned, slipping out of the backseat of his tinted SUV.
A figure approached from the other side of the alley, clad in a loose hoodie and even baggier pants. The two constant rivals, but occasional allies exchanged terse greetings.
“Jaebeom.”
“Jackson.”
Jackson went straight to the point, seething with impatience. It helped mask his fear. “Where is he?”
Jaebeom formed his lips into a hard line and replied, “I don’t know.” The answer was sincere. Jaebeom wasn’t invested enough to lie.
“He’s involved in this,” Jackson pressed, voice lowering like he didn’t want to risk being overheard. “There’s no doubt in my mind.”
Jaebeom did not seem the least bothered or concerned or even interested. In fact, his face was devoid of any expression. “Involved in what?”
“They took something from me,” Jackson confessed, regretting it immediately. He knew exactly the reaction he would get.
Something danced in Jaebeom’s eyes then. He quickly chided, “If they took her, it’s only because you made her worth something of value to you. That was your mistake.”
Jackson clenched his jaw. His suspicions mounted. If Jaebeom knew about you, then someone close must have told him.
Hands in his pockets, Jaebeom ambled closer, shaking his head in combination amusement and disappointment. “You are so predictable,” he reproached. “I should have bet money that you would be the one to screw up our entire plan because you got distracted by a piece of ass.”
“What can I say?” Jackson replied with a shrug, cloaking his wrath. “I am true to my name.”
“And I’m true to mine,” Jaebeom hissed, unflinching as lighting cracked overhead with his warning. “Don’t fuck this up.”
“Jaebeom, please,” Jackson stammered, changing his tactic. “You are the closest thing we have to a leader in this hell on earth. You are the only one that can make him stop.”
Jaebeom turned to leave and said, “You drew the line in the sand. You should have known it would be lonely on the other side.”
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