#jisoo angst

[miabebe]

Calendar Killer (HJS)

Was it really love if it didn't include just a little madness? What was love if it didn't cross the line? And how was it love if it didn't care whether it was the red of love and the red of blood?

Pairing - Afab!reader x Detective! Hong Jisoo (Joshua)

Word count - 14K (we are back to Mia's inability to be concise)

Genre - Psych thriller, smut (18+), supernatural elements hinted, warnings under the cut!

A/n - This is the last installment of my 95s psych thriller Halloween series - I know its late but I just wanted to finish up what I committed to. Also, this is the wildest thing I have ever written, I'm not kidding, buckle up! I do suggest reading Jeonghan's and Cheol's before this!

Thank you to Lola ❤️ @monamipencil, the love of my life for beta reading this and filling our chat with 'oh my god's and frantic comments - I'm a lot more pleased with this piece now hehe

Warnings - Please note that this fic is dark, not morally appropriate at all and as psychotic as it gets. With that being said, let's goooo - people missing, mentions of deaths, bodies, murders, serial killer, mentions of stalking, choking, blowjobs, throat fucking, hair pulling, cum in mouth, masturbation, manhandling, unprotected sex, rough sex, marking, slight dubcon, creampie, psycho thoughts and behaviour

The station buzzed with the oppressive hum of a fluorescent light, flickering occasionally. The air was thick with the musty scent of old paper, the subtle clicking of the typewriter and cold winds blowing in through the open door.

“Great job today boss.” 

Joshua looked up from the paperwork strewn across his desk at Minho standing by the coffee machine, a mug in hand. the dark circles stark under his eyes. It had been a sleepless few weeks for everyone in his team and nights at the station were only getting longer and longer. 

Giving a tired nod of acknowledgement, Joshua turned his attention to what he liked to call his ‘murder board’. Wrong choice of name yes, but someone once told him that positive manifestation was a real thing. Maybe if he kept calling it a ‘murder board’ for long enough, one day he’d finally find himself climbing the ranks, handling real murder cases. He knew with just a little more power in his hands, he could be brilliant - he was a good detective, he had great intuition, he was sharp, efficient. Oh he’d make a fantastic sergeant or maybe even a lieutenant but instead, here he was, sitting in a tiny cubicle, the pages of his case files scattered across his desk, each one heavy with unanswered questions.

Six missing persons cases. That’s what Joshua was stuck on now.

Given his brilliance, it normally didn’t take more than a week for him to crack a case but these? These cases had turned into a three-month-long nightmare of frustration - endless hours of interrogation, dead end leads and constant running in circles. What bothered Joshua the most was that he had spent five years in the field, aced every exam, and most importantly, the sergeant position had been vacant for two months—ever since Hye Jin left for maternity leave. And yet, here he was, stuck in this cubicle, staring at the empty faces on case files, with no promotion in sight. How could he ever climb the ranks with these six cases making him look like an undeserving amateur?

One miracle—that’s all he needed. Six miracles, really. One clue per case, just a single point he had missed, one thing he might have overlooked. Shutting his eyes and leaning back in his chair, he sighed, wondering where on Earth he should look for answers. If only they walked into the station, looking for him. 

And then, you did. 

The creak of the door was what made Joshua’s eyes flicker up, following you as you stepped into the precinct.  You were wet from head to toe, hair sticking to your face and neck, your knee-length white nightgown clinging to your body as if you’d been caught in a downpour.

Joshua glanced outside. 

The sky was gray and heavy, but it was not raining. 

He frowned, rising from his chair. “Can I help you?”

You didn’t speak right away, your eyes darting around the room, searching for something. Joshua’s instincts flickered to life. Something was off, not in a way that screamed danger. Just… unsettling.

Water dripped all over the floor as you walked barefoot, struggling to take steps, shaking eyes, trembling lips and bruised knees accompanying you. Hand hovering over his pager, Joshua’s gaze shifted to his team, who were quietly filling the room, all of them sensing the shift in the air.

 “Are you okay?” He took a tentative step toward you, searching for answers on your face when you refused to meet his eyes. Instead they kept darting nervously over your shoulder and towards the door as though someone was about to follow you in. 

Joshua frowned at the entrance. “Is someone else coming-” 

“Don’t look.” You whispered, grabbing his hands, skin cold and grip tight. “I need help.” 

With a single gesture, Joshua had his team pull up a chair for you as he shrugged off his jacket and wrapped it around your trembling shoulders before gently guiding you to sit. The air around you hummed, almost electric, as if something unknown was lingering.

Stepping back, Joshua leaned against his desk. “What’s going on?”

You hesitated, glancing nervously around the room. When you finally met his eyes, Joshua softened his expression, silently urging you to speak.

“Talk to me.”

“I.. I’m..” You muttered, your hands nervously fiddling with the fabric of your nightgown. “I’m being followed.” 

Joshua's brow furrowed, and he exchanged a glance with his team who immediately began heading towards the door. But you shook your head, fear evident in your voice. “They’re already here. In the precinct.”

“What do you mean?” He studied the room, his mind racing as everyone began frantically looking around, more alert than ever. “No one came in after you-” 

“Y-you can’t see them.” You raised your head, looking directly over Joshua’s shoulder, gulping. “.....Only I can.” 

Joshua followed your line of vision, his eyes finding the empty corner of the room. What on earth were you looking at? 

“I don’t understand, Miss…?” 

“Y/n,” Your voice was steady despite the fear in your eyes.

“Miss Y/n.” Joshua hesitated but still squatted in front of you, his eyes level with yours. “I’m here to help. You have to tell me exactly what’s happening..” 

Taking a shaky breath, you pulled the jacket closer to your body. “It started a week ago, I was coming back from the supermarket and there was a woman, standing right at the edge of the street.” 

“Was she someone you knew?” 

You shook your head. “I could sense her following me all the way home so I made sure to close the door as soon as I stepped inside but when I went into the kitchen…. ..she was already there.“ 

Joshua’s jaw tightened as he listened, watching you gulp the phantom lump in your throat. 

“I grabbed a knife and ran out, screaming for help, but when I brought my neighbor in… there was no one. It was like she vanished…. disappeared, into thin air.”

Joshua’s brows furrowed. “She ran off before you got back?”

You didn’t answer the question, simply continued. 

“Then the next day she was there again, but this time with three others. It was too early in the morning, the street was empty, I-I couldn't even ask anyone for help. When I entered the house I locked myself in again, but when I went into the kitchen…” You let out a shaky breath. “They were already inside. And just like before, when I tried to get help… they disappeared.”

 Joshua leaned forward, concerned.

 “The third day there were more of them, but this time I ran back to the store to get the cashier or the other townspeople to help me but no one could see them….. even though there were, standing right there, at the door, no one could see them.” 

The room grew tense as Joshua exchanged looks with his team. What was happening here?

“Miss Y/n are you sure they were there?” Joshua asked, his voice low.

“I’m not crazy,” You whispered, voice trembling. “They were there then… and they’re here now. All ten of them, right behind you.” 

Joshua felt something cold trickle down his spine. This time, he didn’t feel like looking behind him..

“Y-you can’t see them because they…” You hesitated.. “They are spirits.” 

The room that was already quiet to begin with grew more silent. Even the fluorescent light seemed to pause, waiting for someone to break the tension. Joshua blinked in disbelief, then scoffed softly.

“Spirits?” He repeated, incredulous. “You’re saying ghosts are following you?”

You didn’t flinch at his tone. Your gaze remained serious, too serious as you nodded.

Joshua’s eyes flickered to his team, who were exchanging nervous looks. Things were slipping beyond the edge of rational thought. Was this the universe’s way of taunting him? Yes he has always wanted to work on more complex cases but a beautiful looking seemingly mad woman who could see spirits? That was not on his bucket list. Nor was it his expertise. 

Ji Ho, the only woman on the team and ever the skeptic, slowly walked up to you, her voice calm but firm. “Miss Y/n, don’t worry, we can get you the help you need-” 

“You think I’m crazy.” You shook your head, eyes wide, desperate and not leaving Joshua’s “I swear, you have to believe me, I’m not insane.” 

Realising you wouldn’t cooperate, Joshua held up a hand, signaling for Ji Ho to step back as he slowly reached for his pager, dialing in the code for help.

 “I promise we’ll help you Miss Y/n, you need to trust us-.” 

Suddenly, moving with startling speed, you grabbed the pager out of his hands, anger in your eyes sharp. 

“You’re not listening!” You hissed, your grip tightening around the tiny device. Your hands, which had been shaking just moments before, suddenly stilled. It was as if you had snapped into a new state of resolve - you weren’t just pleading for help anymore; there was something else behind your gaze. Demand.. “These spirits won’t leave me until I give them what they want and you're the only one who can help me do that. I-I can’t live like this anymore.”

Joshua’s fingers tightened around the edge of the desk, his knuckles turning white. Something was off. You were clearly in distress, but there was something more beneath the surface. Something dangerous. The guard he had called for arrived at the door, waiting for his orders. Joshua nodded at Ji Ho who understood immediately and whispered something into his ears. As the uniformed man took off, Joshua walked over to this seat, pulling out a book and a pen. He had to engage you till he had help, he had to play his cards right. 

“Fine.” He flipped to an empty page, ready to write. “Tell me more. These spirits, what do they want?” 

“T-they’ve been telling me their stories, about who they are, about what happened”

“Okay…. Who are they?” Joshua tapped his pen against the surface. “Do you know their names?”

You shook your head. “I…I don’t but, I can ask.”

Looking around the room at nothing in particular you began mumbling something. Slowly, one after the other, you started dropping names as though you were repeating after an invisible, unheard voice. Joshua scribbled them down, eyes constantly darting towards the door, waiting for help. But as the list got longer, with each name he wrote, Joshua felt his guts twist. 

As did the whole team.

 Because they had all spent enough nights on those case files to have every detail memorised. 

Six of the ten names were the missing cases they had been working on. 

“A-are you sure these… these are the six names?” 

“Ten.” You corrected him. “Yes, these are the ten names.” 

Ji Ho met Joshua’s eyes from across the room, shaking her head. How could it be? More than half the names matching their list of victims, this…. This couldn’t just be a coincidence right? 

“You said you can see them? Can you, maybe, describe one of them for me?” Joshua studied your face as your eyebrows furrowed. “The old woman, Ye Soon, what does she look like?” 

“S-she’s around 60 years old. White hair, kind of like a curly bob. She’s got scoliosis so she stands a little crookedly.” You looked at the empty space behind him. “She also has a burn mark on her right hand.” 

Joshua froze. You were right. Down to every detail. 

“And Macy?” 

You turned around, looking over by the window. “She looks like a typical college kid - soft features, long straight hair, cheeks a bit sunken. She also peels the skin by her nails, they’re all bruised.” 

Right again. Your words matched the photos tucked away in the case file almost exactly. 

“And Jason-” 

“Officer Hong, we’re wasting time.” You shook your head. “Describing them is of no use, it doesn’t matter. What matters is what happened to them.” 

“You mean….” Joshua tapped his foot, his mind racing, the realisation just dawning upon him.. “You mean how they died?” 

“I mean how they were murdered.” You lowered your voice just a little. “And now they want justice.” 

The silence now was cold, heavy and deafening. No one knew what to do - the weight of your words had immobilised them all. 

“Josh.” Ji Ho, the only one unable to stay silent anymore, stepped up. “A word?” 

Excusing himself, Joshua got up and made his way to his team, all seven of them huddling around. Some of them looked terrified, constantly looking around, some looked at him plain confused like they still hadn’t put the pieces together. 

“Something’s wrong.” Ji ho crossed her arms. “There’s no way she-” 

“Knows the exact names and descriptions of missing people? Details of a private investigation?” Minho quipped. “I think it finally makes sense why we’ve not been able to trace these people…. They're dead.” 

“Which means all this while what we should have actually been looking for, are bodies.” Jaehyun sighed.

“What?” Ji ho looked at the boys like she couldn’t believe they were falling for this. “You think this is real? You think spirits are actually talking to her?” She turned to Joshua. “Please tell me you’re smarter than to believe in this madness.” 

“I don’t know what to believe right now.” Joshua pinched the bridge of his nose, lost in thought. “I think we should hear what she has to say-” 

“Josh-” 

“Ji Ho, we've been on these cases for months without a single solid lead.” He sighed. “As impossible as this might seem, I am desperate and I want to take a shot.” 

“You’re wasting the team’s time. I don’t think-” 

“She came to me, the case is mine,” Joshua looked at her pointedly. “So I call the shots.” 

Throwing her hands in the air, Ji Ho walked away, refusing to be a part of what she mumbled - a meaningless spectacle. Joshua returned, pulling a chair up, sitting right before you. Although he was the one who wanted answers, you beat him to the questioning. 

“You don’t believe me do you?” You sounded so scared. “You think I’m insane.” 

“I want to believe you, trust me Miss Y/n, you have no idea how easy it would make my life to believe you, six of these people are actually….” Shaking his head he held himself back, sticking to what was important. “The point is, you have come to the right place for help, the law can help you. But the law also requires proof, you need to prove what you’re saying is true.” 

You gulped, tapping your feet unsure, eyes darting around. 

“Ye Soon, that old woman.” You looked at him, slightly hesitating. “What if I took you to her?” 

Joshua frowned confused.

“What if I showed where she is…. “ Scooting closer to him, you whispered. “She told me everything, I can take you to where her body is.” 

Ji Ho looked at Joshua with narrowed eyes. Joshua returned her look with an unreadable expression. As though the universe had timed it all, the guard finally returned with help - two men dressed in soft blue scrubs carrying the logo of the town’s only psychiatric hospital. 

There were one of two things Joshua could do. He knew sending you away was the right thing to do, he knew you needed help, he knew listening to you was madness. 

But he also knew you were the closest thing to answers he had gotten in months. 

Turning to you, he pulled your chair closer. “Show me.” His voice was low, urgent. “Right now.”

Joshua stood by the back door, the rain slashing against the pavement like a thousand tiny daggers. He lit his cigar, inhaling the smoke as the faint hum of the town’s heartbeat seemed to vanish into the downpour. The cold air bit at his skin, but he didn’t care. His thoughts, heavy with the case, weighed him down more than any storm ever could.

Beside him you stood, leaning against the brick wall, your arms holding on to his jacket, wrapped around your midsection as if bracing against the cold. Your damp nightgown had long since dried, but the way you stood, your shoulders slightly hunched, made it seem like you were still caught in the storm.

Joshua couldn’t help but watch you. Something about you unsettled him, though he couldn’t put his finger on it. His eyes found their way to you, running all over your features, lingering longer than they should have. 

“Smoking is bad for your health.” 

You finally spoke, looking at him with those big eyes. Brown, soft, expressionless eyes. 

“I believe every man should have some bad habit.” Joshua chuckled, offering a small smile. “Keeps him grounded.” 

You laughed softly—a sound that almost got lost in the rain’s incessant roar, but thankfully, his ears were sharp enough to catch it.

“Do you have a bad habit Miss Y/n?” 

You hummed, looking far off at the quiet darkness of the town. “I don't know if this is bad but, I tend to go to any lengths to help the people I love.” 

Joshua’s lips pressed together. His gaze flicked to you, considering your words. “Must be why the spirits chose to talk to you,” he muttered, more to himself than to you. “Maybe they knew you’d help no matter what.”

When he turned to see what you thought of that, he found a small almost imperceptible smile tugging the corner of your lips. It was subtle, but present, making his chest tighten unexpectedly 

“What?” he asked, his voice betraying the flutter in his chest.

You shook your head, still smiling. “I’m just relieved you believe me.” 

How could he not? Afterall, Ye Soon was indeed where you said she would be - at the abandoned ice cream factory, tucked away in a large freezer, the body months old and ice cold. His team—especially Ji Ho—had recoiled in disbelief, but you? You hadn’t flinched. You stood aside, quiet and composed, as the body was recovered.

Over the last two hours, samples of hair, nails, fluid and whatever else that could be found were gathered and sent to the forensic lab for analysis but Joshua had a bigger question to address. 

“Is…” He took a deep breath. “Is Ye Soon somewhere around here?”

“She’s by the gate.” You turned to him. “Why?”

“I just want to confirm….. you’re sure she didn’t see the face of her killer?”

On the ride back, you had recounted Ye Soon’s entire story to the team. How she had felt  like she was being stalked for a long time. How she didn’t usually go anywhere at night but on the evening of her birthday, she couldn’t resist the free dinner invitation she received. How she was walking to the restaurant, dressed up and all alone when she was attacked from behind. 

You shook your head, expression slightly dejected. “No, her killer wore a mask so she had no idea who it was. One moment she was hit on the head and bleeding to death and the next, she found herself looking at her body in the freezer…. as a spirit.” 

“If justice is what she wants, it's going to be hard without having any idea who the killer is.” He sighed. “For now, we can start looking into why a freezer was functioning in an abandoned factory for the last 4 months but…. I’m not sure if it’ll lead to anything solid.” 

“Don't lose hope already.” You pushed yourself off the wall, taking a step closer to him. “The forensic team might have some answers.” 

“I hope so.” He nodded, but his thoughts were elsewhere. His gaze lingered on you, and for a brief moment, he imagined what it might be like to trust you completely. “Miss Y/n, I'll need you to lead me to the other nine bodies too. I hope it won’t be too much trouble for you.”

“Of course not.” You shook your head, hand finding his wrist reassuringly. “Although one of them is quite far and it's already past midnight-”

“Not now, tomorrow morning.” He glanced at your eager expression, hands itching to tuck that tiny strand of hair behind your ear. “It's late now, you should head home.” 

You nodded, drawing your hand back, and Joshua already missed the warmth of your touch. Taking a step back, you attempted to remove his jacket, but when a strong gust of wind blew, a shiver ran down your body.

Joshua chuckled, pulling it up your arms, adjusting it over your shoulders. “Keep it, it suits you better.” 

“Careful officer.” You smiled at him. “If you come asking for it again, I won't give it back.” 

“Fine by me.” He laughed. “Let me grab my keys, I'll drop you.” 

“That's okay, I'll walk.”

“It's raining Miss Y/n. I don't think-”

“I like walking in the rain.” You stuck your hand out in the pouring water. “Makes me feel good.” 

“I could walk you.” 

“It’s not like I don’t have company.” Joshua frowned as you giggled. “The spirits, officer. They follow me everywhere.” 

That flicker of something playful in your eyes - Joshua was seeing it for the first time. When you had walked in here earlier you had been so terrified, shaking, desperate for help. Now you seemed so unfazed. Maybe you were glad that you were finally getting help. Maybe you were never really terrified. Either way, the unsettling shift in your demeanor troubled his mind. 

“You sure you’ll be okay?” His tone was lighter than he intended, masking what he was truly feeling.

“I’ll be fine,” You brushed him off with the wave of a hand. “I’ll just get lost in my own thoughts, without any distractions.”

Joshua didn’t stop you as you began walking. He simply watched as you glanced over your shoulder, muttering a small “good night” before stepping into the rain. Slowly, as your figure was swallowed by the darkness of the night, Joshua retreated into the debate in his mind. Should he follow to make sure you weren’t in trouble?

Or were you the trouble that was looming around the corner?

Joshua leaned back in his chair, his eyes locked on the scattered files in front of him. The low hum of the fluorescent lights above, along with the steady, almost rhythmic tap of his fingers against the desk, were the only sounds that filled the otherwise silent room. The pile of crime scene files seemed to grow heavier with each glance—each one a grim reminder of the ten bodies they had recovered. Ten people dead, each with their own story, now reduced to nothing more than photos, forensic reports, and police notes.

Two weeks. Two long weeks of following the trail you’d led them to, finding all ten victims hidden in the most unimaginable locations, each one’s story recounted with haunting detail. As per protocol, his team had collected every piece of evidence they could find, and the progressive inspection of each item only further corroborated your stories. Ji Ho, who had initially resisted being part of this madness, had also joined, keenly looking into the details of the investigation.

There was just one detail that Joshua could not wrap his head around - the fact that all ten victims had apparently not seen their killer’s face. 

Each one had been attacked from behind - either struck on the head, run over by a car, strangled from behind or shoved off a building. It was always from the back, perfectly concealing their perpetrators face, keeping that identity a mystery.  Aside from this one detail which was making the progress of his investigation incredibly difficult, Joshua did not notice anything strikingly similar amongst all the cases. 

That was until he was staring at his now very real murder board earlier today. 

It was filled with a dozen pictures and pins, only getting messier with every detail but there was one connection Joshua happened to piece as he searched for the finer details - Ye Soon was going for a dinner on her birthday, Macy was returning from a birthday party her friends had thrown her, Jason was going to meet his girlfriend to celebrate his birthday….. All ten of them had died on their birthday and not just that - all of their birthdays fell on the 30th of the month. 

And that was when the pieces clicked. Joshua arranged all ten cases according to a timeline, spanning from January this year to November. Every month on the 30th, right on their birthday, one victim had died and Joshua knew for a fact that this was a pattern because there was no victim in February - the only month without a 30th. 

This was an MO. This wasn’t the work of ten different killers. It was one. One serial killer.

The moment he realized this, he knew he should share it with his team, but for some reason, he couldn’t bring himself to. Perhaps it was because he knew the moment he revealed this discovery, all eyes would turn to one person—You.

And sure enough, the door slammed open and Ji Ho entered, a thick file in her hand. 

“I heard back from forensics.” She walked over, setting the papers on his table. “But you’re a brilliant detective Joshua, so you must have already figured this out.” 

“What?” Joshua sipped on his coffee, trying to appear nonchalant. 

“There were many different DNAs collected at the crime scenes, but one particular DNA was found at every single one.” 

Fuck. There it was.  His worst fear, out loud.

“This is clearly a serial killer Joshua.” When he didn’t meet her eye, she moved into his line of vision. “For heaven’s sake, why are you trying to protect her?” 

“Who?” Joshua shot back, his jaw tightening.

“Y/n.” She spoke through gritted teeth. “Please tell me you’re not being an infatuated fool-” 

“I’m not a fool.” 

“But you don’t deny the infatuation.” Ji Ho’s voice rose as she pointed at him. “I’ve seen you two over the last many days - you think I don’t recognise the way you look at her?” 

“Ji Ho, just because the two of us were once a thing and it didn’t work out-” 

“This isn’t about us!” She threw her hands in the air, frustration evident. “You know I’m more professional than that. This is about you. You saw a petite, pretty damsel in distress who told you a sob story and leaned on your shoulder and you decided to forget about everything sensible.” 

“You aren’t being sensible!” Joshua turned to face her, anger simmering. “Ji Ho, if Y/n was the killer why would she lead us to the bodies? Why would she try to implicate herself?” 

“You know how the brains of psychos work. They think they’re too smart, that they’ll never be caught.” Ji Ho crossed her arms. “This is just a game for her.” 

Joshua shook his head. “She’d have to be too dumb to expose herself like this. Using the paranormal to do it, don’t you think it’s too much?” 

“I knew you wouldn’t believe me.” Ji Ho let out a heavy breath. “So I did what I had to do. I called Y/n here.” 

He frowned. “Why?” 

“I took a sample of her hair without her knowledge and sent it to the lab.” Ji Ho took a step back, her eyes cold. “In a short while, we’ll know if that DNA matches hers… You’ll have your answers then.” 

“Ji Ho, this wasn’t my order—”

“I’m sorry but I don’t care, Josh.” She stopped her tracks by the door. “We might have been in love years ago, but I know what you are like. You’ll do anything to protect her and I cannot just sit back and watch you indulge in this stupidity.” 

“I’m none of your fucking concern!” Joshua’s voice rose in frustration as she walked out without another word. “Ji Ho, come back here, goddammit!”

Frustrated he slammed his hands on the table, the coffee cup toppling to the ground. It wasn’t like Joshua hadn’t thought of this possibility but this was his case to solve. He wanted to talk to you first, hear whatever it was from your mouth, not some cold DNA report.

Recalling Ji Ho say that you were here, Joshua bolted out of his room to the visitors lounge. There you were, sitting on the couch with your feet pulled up, flipping through a magazine while the sound of a Spanish telenovela played in the background. Annoyed by the noise, Joshua grabbed the remote and switched it off before walking toward you.

 In the sudden absence of the sound you looked up, eyes finding him, a smile spreading across your face as he sat beside you on the couch. Normally, Joshua wouldn’t sit so close to a witness—or take her hand in his—but you were different.

“Hi.” You whispered. “You look tense.” 

“How long have you been here?” 

“About half an hour,” You rubbed his arm comfortingly. “Ji Ho said you wanted to talk to me.” 

Joshua swallowed, his throat suddenly dry. “There’s been some progress in the case.”

You turned to him, curious. “Did you find any of the killers?” 

“Not exactly.” He shook his head. “I…I got a lead, though. Actually I’m not sure it’s much of a clue.” 

“What is it?” 

“All of them were killed on the 30th of the month.” He watched you closely, studying your face for any flicker of recognition, of guilt. “It seems like a pattern. Like this might be the work of one person.” 

“One person?” Your eyes widened. “You mean like a serial killer?”

Joshua nodded. 

“A serial killer who kills on the 30th of every month.” You muttered, lost in thought. “Why the 30th?” 

“I don’t know.” He shrugged, his voice tight. “Maybe they don’t like the number.”

“I won’t be surprised.” You pursed your lips. “I’ve never really liked the number 30 either. It’s like a deadline... something always looming, reminding you of the things you haven’t done. The things you can’t undo.”

Joshua blinked, trying to keep his expression neutral. Please, please, please, this can’t be true.

“But if I am right and if this is a pattern,.” He stared at their intertwined hands. “30th December is not far off and maybe they have another victim in their sight…. I need to find this killer soon.” 

“If it is a serial killer then this is much easier than we thought.” You reassured, turning towards him. “Think about it, isn’t it better to find one person than ten? And won’t all the evidence help you narrow down who the culprit is? All you have to do is something common amongst them all, right?”

Joshua nodded. Exactly. It was easy. Which meant it couldn’t have been you, could it? You wouldn’t have committed those crimes and then set up a trap for yourself would you? That made no sense. 

Or perhaps Joshua was refusing to see sense in it. Perhaps he was so drawn by you that he couldn’t bring himself to see reason. 

With each passing day, he had found his eyes lingering less over the crime scene and more over you. With each body being discovered, it was like the weight on your shoulders was lessening. You seemed more free, more at peace, more…..beautiful. Whenever your eyes met his, you began to smile. Whenever he rode his bike and you sat behind him, he felt his heart do a somersault in his chest. Just watching you walk into the station every morning made him feel a relief like no other.

Joshua had begun to like these small things. Your presence, your tiny quirks, the way you told stories, even though they were quite horrendous recounts, he liked how expressive your face was. He liked you. 

And it was evident you liked him too.

At first, Joshua thought you liked to be around him because you felt safe but slowly you began sitting closer to him than usual. You began following him on walks to survey perimeters, holding his hand when you tripped but not letting it go even when you were steady. He could tell by the way you looked at him - you felt the same thing he was feeling. That undeniable attraction, that magnetism. 

Except there was only one tiny thing between the two of you - you might be a potential murderer and Joshua might have to implicate you for your crimes. Which is why none of this could be true. You could not be the killer. 

But no sooner than he thought that, the door to the visitors room flung open making the two of you jump apart and Ji Ho stepped in, a thin file in her hand. 

“The results are back.” Her eyes flickered between both of you. “I’m sorry Josh but the DNA matches…. It’s her.” 

Joshua's heart dropped. The words echoed in his mind, and for a split second, the world seemed to stop.

It was you. You were the killer.

Joshua stood in the observation room, his eyes locked on you through the two-way mirror. 

You were slouched at the table, head low, your exhaustion palpable. The harsh light above cast long shadows across your face, making your features appear fragile and worn. Joshua’s heart tightened as he watched you. He longed to step in, to pull you close and promise that everything would be okay, but he couldn’t. He had to remain detached, professional—even though every instinct screamed to comfort you.

For the past three days, he had avoided entering the interrogation room, choosing instead to watch from the observation window, a silent witness to your suffering. He could see the strain in your eyes each time you pleaded for belief, for a chance to prove your innocence. Occasionally, you’d look towards him, and in those fleeting moments, it was as if you could see him right through the mirror. The desperate, pleading look you gave shattered something inside him—his resolve, his detachment. Every time, he felt that same arrow pierce his heart, and yet, he remained still, unable to intervene. Helpless.

His gaze flickered to Minho, who had just entered the room, pulling up his sleeves with the usual resolve. Joshua turned away from the mirror, his jaw tightening. He had to hold it together. He couldn’t let Minho see how he was unraveling inside.

“It’s my turn boss.” He glanced at Joshua. “Unless you want to?”

Joshua shook his head, sipping on his coffee. Minho sighed, pulling the door open and stepping in, catching you off guard with his sudden appearance. Joshua watched the man as he took a seat, settling the files on the table before you. 

“Where’s Joshua?” You asked, your eyes flickering toward the door expectantly.

“I’ll ask the questions Miss.Y/n.” Minho cleared his throat a little too loudly.

“For the last time,” You sighed. “I did not do it. I am not the killer-” 

“I’m not suggesting you are the killer Miss Y/n.” He pushed the file towards you. “I simply want you to explain why your DNA has been found on all ten sites.” 

“I’ve already told you,” you leaned back in your chair, frustration evident in your voice. “When the spirits first talked to me, I went to some of those locations to make sure I wasn’t losing my mind. How many times do I have to repeat myself?”

“You mentioned you went to-” He flipped through the papers “-four sites. Then how was your DNA found at all ten?” 

“Maybe because I was the one who led you to those locations,” you shot back, crossing your arms.

“Are you suggesting we are stupid enough to mess up the sample collection?” Minho’s voice grew colder. “That we sat back and let you contaminate those crime scenes?”

“Then are you suggesting that I am stupid enough to commit ten murders and walk into a station and implicate myself?”  you retorted.

Minho leaned back, narrowing his eyes.“I don’t know Miss Y/n. I’m looking for you to give me the answers.” 

“For god’s sake!” You slammed your palm onto the table, frustration boiling over. “If you think I’m going to cave to this tortuous questioning and admit to something I didn’t do, you’re wrong. I. Didn’t. Do. It.” 

“But you could have helped the killer.” Minho shrugged. “The sentence for an accomplice to murder is less severe Miss Y/n, if you admit to it, we can help you-” 

“I don’t need your help because I did not do this.” You glanced at the mirror,your eyes locking with Joshua’s yet again. “I made a mistake coming here thinking you could help me, you’d help them. But now I am being held here, blamed for something I didn’t do.” 

Joshua’s grip on his coffee tightened, his gaze sliding away from you. He had nothing to say.

Minho exhaled sharply. “Miss Y/n, you are being held because the evidence clearly points at you-” 

“Or maybe I’m here because you need a scapegoat to take the fall.” you interrupted, voice dripping with bitterness.

Surprised, Joshua straightened out. 

“I heard six of these cases were in fact missing people that your team hadn’t been able to find in months.” you continued, your tone mocking. “Convenient isn’t it, to blame it all on the only other person involved in the uncovering of the crime scene? A nice, easy way to wrap this up neatly.” 

“Are you implying that one of us manipulated the evidence to make it look like you’re the killer?” Minho snapped.

“I didn’t say that,” you tilted your head, your gaze sharp. “But you seem to be admitting to it.”

“Miss Y/n, don’t twist my words….” 

But there was no need to. 

Joshua took a step back, mind running through the possibilities. About who might have such a motive, who might have manipulated the evidence…..

There was only one person who popped in his mind. Someone who was as driven as him to solve these cases. Someone who didn’t want to be a part of the investigation but had joined regardless. Someone who could possibly benefit from trapping you in this case. 

Ji Ho. 

Joshua knew his ex girlfriend well enough to dismiss this possibility of her involvement. It was the reason the two of them had broken up - She was incredibly competitive, she never seemed to remember the relationship the two of them shared when they were in a professional space, she was never happy for him, never acknowledged his achievements.

But that did not mean there was no passion between them outside the walls of the precinct. God they were wild and couldn’t keep their hands and eyes off each other. Things were fine till whatever happened at work stayed at work, but the more Joshua became successful in his career, Ji Ho started bringing her professional grievances home, between them. The suffocation her competitiveness brought forth was what stifled their bond - Joshua couldn’t live with it any longer. 

But maybe, now that he thought about it, this situation allowed her to kill two birds with one stone - on one hand, the cases termed nearly impossible could finally be closed and on the other, you, his new person of interest would be out of the way. Joshua saw the way Ji Ho looked at the two of you, like she didn’t like it one bit - her incriminating you wasn’t exactly impossible. When she had secretly taken a sample of your hair to cross verify with the identified DNA, who’s to say she didn’t plant the other evidence the same way? 

Grabbing his pager from the table, he gave you one last glance before pulling the door open, setting off to look for the woman in question. He had to act fast. He needed to find out if Ji Ho was involved. 

Thankfully he didn’t have to look far, she was right at the visitors room, remote in her hand, watching the same Spanish telenovela that had been perpetually on the station’s TV for months.

“Ji Ho-” Joshua called out.

“Shh,” she raised a hand to silence him, keeping her eyes on the screen. “I’m watching.”

“Is that more important than what’s happening with Y/n-” 

“Honestly? Yeah,” she replied without missing a beat, her tone flippant. “This is actually what helped save her.”

Joshua stared at her, bewildered. “What do you mean, ‘save her’?”

“I think she’s innocent,” Ji Ho said, finally turning to face him.

All points of argument that Joshua had come up with died in his mind. What? 

“You do? You believe she’s innocent?” He placed himself right before the screen. “You were the one who was so sure she did it-” 

“I simply believed the evidence that came up.” She rolled her eyes. “But unlike you, I don’t let my emotions rule over practicality.” 

“I did not-” 

“I know you Josh, I know something is wrong. Your judgement has been clouded for days, you’re not thinking straight. But I am.” She crossed her arms, taking a deep breath. “I knew we needed more irrefutable evidence and most importantly, we needed a motive so I had been looking and asking around. Turns out she has an alibi.” 

“What kind of alibi?” 

“The people at the store confirmed that a few weeks back she had run in, scared and shaking, claiming she was followed. The neighbours also said that she had approached them for help a few times but they didn't see anyone.” 

“Didn't you say that she might have done all that to make her story more convincing?”

“Yes but,” Ji Ho bit her lower lip hesitating. “I also broke into her house-” 

“You what??” 

“-and I found her passport and a couple of other things that prove she wasn't even in town when three or four of those murders happened, the timelines don't match.”

 “So it might not be her?” Joshua let out an inward sigh of relief. “Then… then what about the DNA?” 

“Precisely.” Ji Ho nodded, gesturing him to turn around. “Watch this.” 

Frowning Joshua did, eyes falling on the tv screen. He wasn't really familiar with this show, the only reason he had ever watched it was because Ji Ho was obsessed with it. He did remember this particular part of the plot though - everyone thought Maria was the mother of Lizzy but it was actually her twin, Gloria. 

Twin?.....

“Identical twins have the exact same DNA.” Ji Ho muted the show as his mind raced with the possibilities. “Do you know if Y/n has a twin?”

Joshua shook his head. He didn't ask much about your family or personal life, he didn't really find the chance to have such a conversation but if there was even a possibility….

Rushing out, Joshua barged into the interrogation room where Minho was still badgering you with his questions. 

“Joshua….” You looked up at him, eyes widening. For the first time in days, you saw something other than apology in his eyes. You clung to that look, hoping it meant he was still on your side. Ji Ho followed him, walking into the room right behind, earning a small frown from you. 

“Y/n,” Watching Joshua unable to say anything she walked up, shoving her hands in her pockets. “There's something important we need to know.” 

“What is it?” You continued to look at Joshua who simply nodded softly, signalling you not to worry. 

“Do you happen to have a twin? An identical one?”

Blinking rapidly, you hesitated. “I…. I do, yeah, why?” 

Joshua and Ji Ho exchanged looks. Fuck. 

“Where is she?”

“I- I don't know. We both grew up at the St. Mary orphanage. At around the age of eight, she was adopted. The family didn't want two kids so they only took her in. Few months later I was adopted by a different family so we haven't really seen each other or even heard from each other since then.” Your eyes flickered between both the officers. “Why? What happened?” 

Thank god. Thank fucking god. 

Joshua let out the breath he was holding, shutting his eyes briefly out of relief. 

Ji Ho, who looked both guilty and curious, stepped closer to you. “So you don’t know where she is right now?” 

You shook your head, “But I know she's a Mayor's daughter, I don't remember for which town though.” 

Nodding at Joshua, Ji Ho whispered something into Minho's ears before the two of them hurriedly left the room. Standing up confused, your eyes followed them as Joshua neared you. 

“Joshua what's happening?” 

He didn't say anything, just simply pulled you into a hug, finally feeling your warmth again as you wrapped your arms around his waist. 

“You'll be fine.” He held onto you tighter. “I'm not going to let anything happen to you.” 

Joshua watched you fast sleep on the couch of the visitor’s lounge. 

Curled up, with your hair spilling over your face like a dark veil, you looked peaceful, untouched by the weight of the world. As much as Joshua longed to slip in beside you and to hold you as you slept, he knew better. He had to maintain some distance. The team had already been giving him looks whenever you stood too close to him, leaning over case files, working through the details of the investigation. At least the pity and disdain in their eyes had faded—now that you were cleared, they saw you as less of a suspect. 

Ji Ho, ever the efficient one, had tracked down your twin just a few days ago. She had been found in a town several hours away, barely conscious, dragged into the precinct with the sour smell of alcohol still clinging to her. Standing beside Joshua, you watched your twin in the interrogation room, hungover and dazed, trying to make sense of the evidence mounting against her. Though you hadn’t spoken in years, the ache in your chest was unmistakable. You didn’t want to believe it was her but even after sobering up when she failed to provide any alibi, the truth was undeniable.

Her neighbors, friends, and even family all corroborated the fact that she had fallen deep into drugs, her life spiraling out of control. The last few months had turned her into someone unrecognizable—violent, unpredictable and uncontrollable. No one could vouch for her whereabouts during the killings either and as the investigation wore on, the evidence stacked up against her, leaving little room for doubt. In the end, she was arrested, the case moving forward to court where she was to be prosecuted for her crimes. 

Today was your final day at the station—just a few papers to sign, a final nod to close the investigation. After this, the case would be officially closed and the two of you would not be bound by the investigation anymore - there was no obligation to see each other. 

“You know,” Ji Ho’s voice broke the silence, pulling Joshua out of his thoughts, “just because the case is over doesn’t mean you won’t get to see her.”

Joshua turned to see her standing in the doorway, arms crossed, leaning casually against the frame.

“I know.” He muttered, feeling a familiar pang in his chest. “But how do you always know what I’m thinking?”

She chuckled, stepping into the room. “Because I know you, Joshua. Better than anyone. I just wish you knew me too. I wish you knew me better. I would never incriminate someone out of pettiness.”

He winced, guilt tugging at him. “I’m sorry. I guess I was just ready to believe anything that meant Y/n was innocent.”

Ji Ho glanced at you. “Well, you don't have to worry about that anymore. She is innocent. “ 

“Thanks to you.” He smiled, looking at you slightly shifting in your sleep, mouth now slightly open as you continued to doze off. “She would have still been a suspect if not for your brilliance.” 

“Nah.” Ji Ho waved her hand, dismissing his words. “I only did what I had to, it's my job. But what's really amazing is you cracked the cases Joshua, the ones no one could solve for months. I heard the promotion letter is on the way.” 

“It should have been yours Ji Ho.” Staring at the ground Joshua shifted uncomfortably, refusing to meet her eyes. He couldn't bring himself to. “I know how much you wanted this too, and I… I don’t understand why you gave all the credit to me.”

Ji Ho sighed, her gaze distant. “I did want it. But I felt like you deserved it more, especially for all that I put you through the last many days.” 

“So this is out of pity?” 

“It's out of admiration.” She corrected. “I don't know if I would have been able to keep my calm the way you did when Y/n was being accused. You put your job above everything, you were the one who figured out the killer's MO, you were the driving force of this investigation. It's only right that you go up the ranks.” She then paused as though she was unsure if she should continue. “You can also think of it as an early birthday present from me.” 

Joshua glanced at the calendar, the black rimmed circle placed over 29th December. His birthday was tomorrow. Here he was, too wrapped up in all this to even remember but of course Ji Ho did. Even after all that happened, she remembered. 

“Thanks,” he muttered, trying to mask the sudden rush of gratitude. Before he could say more, his gaze shifted back to you. You were beginning to stir, shifting on the couch, their voices perhaps pulling you from your slumber.

Ji Ho noticed it too, and with a small nod, she tucked her hands in her pockets and began to back out of the room. “I should go. You and Y/n should have a nice celebration tomorrow, okay?”

Joshua smiled, not entirely convinced as she disappeared into the buzz of the busy office. Was he really worthy of a celebration though? Even though the six biggest problems of his life had been solved giving him the promotion he wanted more than anything, Joshua didn't quite find himself fully relieved. It was as though there was something he still wasn't seeing. 

When you finally raised your head, blinking sleepily, Joshua pushed all his conflicting thoughts aside. Right now, only you mattered.

“Morning sunshine.” He smiled softly, voice light.

You glanced at the window, then at the clock. “It's 6pm Joshua.” 

“Yes but you've been sleeping like it's the dead of the night.” 

“Can you blame me?” You yawned. “For the first time in days, I'm able to sleep without thinking about somebody constantly watching me.” When Joshua looked confused, you sat up, crossing your legs. “The spirits, Joshua.” 

“They're gone?” 

“I haven't seen much of them the last few days, ever since she was brought in…..” You trailed off, your gaze flickering down to your restless hands. “I guess they've gotten the justice they're looking for.” 

“I'd have thought they'd stick around at least till the trial.” Joshua looked thoughtful. “She's the Mayor's daughter. What if she buys her way out of this?” 

“I don't know.” You shrugged. “I know her background might allow her to escape this unscathed but I hope not. Perpetrators deserve to be punished.” 

Something about your words stung Joshua differently. Indeed, the perpetrator should be punished, but for that, it was necessary to find the real culprit. A tiny voice in his head was making him doubt his choice. 

“I thought twins were naturally very protective of one another.” He glanced at you carefully. “You seem okay with whatever is happening to your sister.” 

You looked at him incredulously. “Of course I'm upset but you know what she did. I'm not emotionally attached to her because we barely know anything about each other but even if I was, do you think someone who killed so many people deserves to walk freely? The spirits trusted me to ensure they got justice Joshua, how can I let their murderer not face any consequences?” 

Joshua stared at the wall behind you, mind racing to the time it all began with you walking into the station. Your claim about spirits only you could see, all ten spirits being unaware of their killer yet all ten of them conveniently being killed by the same person. Your knowledge of all the crime sites, finding your DNA in every single one. You happening to have a twin sister who, in contrast to your perfect alibis, didn't have any. It was all too easy - was it a lucky coincidence that the spirits found the estranged twin of their perpetrator to be their yielder of justice? Or had he in fact caught the wrong sister…..Joshua felt a chill run down his spine. Somehow, it didn't seem like this case was over - there was clearly more to it. 

He turned his attention back to you, gulping when he realised you were studying his zoned out expression intently. 

“What is it?” You raised an eyebrow. “What are you thinking?” 

“Just…” He cleared his throat. “I wanted to come over and get my jacket back but I realised I didn't even know where you lived.” 

You cocked your head at him, a knowing expression on your face. “I told you - Once you give it to me, I won’t return it if you ask.” 

“Right.” Joshua chuckled, though it didn’t reach his eyes. 

Fuck. This was his one shot to confirm the truth before it was too late. Twins might look identical and even have the same DNA but their fingerprints? Fingerprints were unique even among twins and Joshua wanted to get his hands on yours. His jacket being a leather one would have been an easy way to obtain them but now, he had to think of something else.

“I was thinking, do you want to maybe go out and get dinner today?” He looked at you feigning casualness he was not feeling. “We've never really gotten the chance to do anything outside the precinct, I thought we could spend some time….”

You shook your head softly, a small, apologetic smile playing at your lips as you got up. “Not tonight. I have something I need to do.”

“Something more important than me?” He smiled half-heartedly, trying to mask the hurt. “Than us?” 

Laughing softly you walked up to him, hands clasped behind your hand as you leaned in and placed a soft kiss on his cheek. “I'll be seeing you tomorrow anyway, birthday boy.”

Joshua watched as you slowly pulled away from him and began to leave, the lightness of your kiss still lingering on his skin. It didn’t feel like an intimate gesture, more like a goodbye, a farewell to something unspoken.

He stood frozen, entangled in his web of thoughts, unsure of what to do with himself. But when the moment passed, he made up his mind. - he couldn’t wait any longer. He had to know the truth.

Rushing towards Ji Ho’s cubicle, his heart pounding in his chest, he called out to her breathlessly. 

“You said you broke into Y/n’s place, right?”

Her eyes widened, surprised by his urgency. She nodded.

“I need you to give me the address.”

Joshua slowly pushed the door of your house, both surprised and thankful it was unlocked. 

He had been hiding in the bushes for over an hour now, watching you move around through the glass of the window. About ten minutes ago, you had donned his jacket, pulled your hair into a high ponytail and left the house, walking into the dead of the night. Joshua glanced at his watch - it was 11pm and he had no idea what kind of business you had set off to do. Now that he thought about it, Joshua didn’t know anything about you at all - why then was he so enthralled by you?

He had to snap out of it. He was here to find the truth and that’s what he was going to do. When he was finally convinced that you weren’t returning to grab something you might have forgotten, Joshua mustered his courage and stepped carefully into the dimly lit house, his heartbeat quickening with each creak of the floorboard beneath his shoes. This was the only chance he might have to explore your space, your sanctuary, see who you were outside that mask of affection you always wore when they were together. He knew it was dangerous and reckless, but he had to be sure. 

The house was quiet. Too quiet. It smelled faintly of lavender, mixed with a subtle undertone of something he couldn’t quite place. He moved through the living room, avoiding the clutter of half-empty cups and newspapers, scanning for anything that might give him a clue. The space looked like it hadn’t been cared for in a while, like you hadn’t been home for a long time. Joshua made mental notes of everything as he walked in, his feet taking him around like he had been here a hundred times already. 

It was only when he tripped over the rug that his tracks stopped, prompting him to look at the cause of his near fall - A loose floorboard. Frowning he crouched down and pried it loose, the cool edge of the tile slipping from its mortar with a slight scrape. Underneath, hidden in the narrow compartment, was a small wooden box, its surface worn with time. Turning it in his hands, Joshua pried it open.

Photographs. 

Hundreds of photographs of you. 

No, not you… you didn’t dress in designer wear, drink expensive champagne or drive in a Rolls Royce. This was your sister. 

You had uncountable photographs of her, carefully taken and meticulously arranged. She looked young in some of them and much older in others. Some were clearly taken from a distance while others seemed more intimate, like they’d been taken while she was unaware….. You had been stalking her.

From the looks of it, you had been keeping an eye on her for years, watching her every move. Joshua’s stomach churned, a new sense of unease settling over him. You said you hadn’t seen her in years - you lied. 

Spreading them out on the cold floor, he flipped through them, realising that everyone was right about her - she had an affinity to party and indulge in drugs, often blacking out in the middle of nowhere. But he also realised that she in fact, had an alibi…. A couple of dates on these photos were on the 30th… she couldn’t have possibly been the killer. 

And more importantly, you knew that. If you had taken these pictures, you knew your sister was innocent - yet you watched her be put away behind the bars. 

Fuck. 

This was a terrible mistake. 

Quickly moving, Joshua grabbed the relevant photos - Ji Ho had to see this, the whole team had to see this. But before he could smoothly stash them away in his pocket, he heard the familiar creak of the floorboard at the entrance. You were back. 

Joshua’s breath hitched as the soft footfall of your steps echoed through the quiet room, getting louder and louder by the minute. Panicking, he quickly stuffed everything back in the box, shoved it back into its hidden compartment and placed the floorboard back in place, pretending like nothing had happened.

Just as he stood up, turning towards the sound, his eyes fell on your figure lingering by the large wooden arch, watching him intensely. Slowly, almost deliberately, you closed the distance in between, eyes not leaving him, not blinking. Joshua tensed, his body stiffening with a mix of fear and anticipation. And when you reached him, you didn’t speak - merely tilted your head, your eyes searching his face as if reading something he didn’t want you to see.

Then, without warning, curling your fingers around his collar, pulling him closer, you kissed him. 

Your lips pressed against his, tenderly but also carrying an undeniable weight. Joshua's body froze for a moment, completely caught off guard by the intensity of it, the subtle brush of your lips conveying something far deeper than simple affection. Your hands moved, one sliding up to his neck, the other tangling in his hair, and for a brief second, Joshua forgot himself. His hand cupped your face, as he pushed you back against the wall, kissing you passionately, like he was a hungry man, finally being fed. You moaned as the heat swelled between the pressed bodies, both of you powerless to the undeniable attraction between the two of you. 

Finally, you pulled away, just a fraction, your breath warm on his lips, and in that silence, you softly bit your lower lip, looking at him with big, lust blown eyes. 

"Did I play my part well, Shua?"

Joshua’s heart stuttered in his chest, his breath slowing down, eyes fixed on you. 

And then he cocked his head and gave a short nod.

At last, at fucking last, Joshua allowed the mask to crack, a small, victorious smile dancing on his face. The smile that had once been charming and controlled, faltered at the edges, now that he had come face to face with the full scope of the story he had spun. The facade he worked so hard to maintain, the calculated version of himself that had held the reins of this twisted game, finally slipped away. 

Dragging his hand down from your cheek, he wrapped it around your throat, pulling you closer, angling your face up, pressing contrastingly soft kisses along your jaw. You sighed happily despite struggling to breathe, eyes rolling back as you grabbed his wrist, not to pull his choking hand away, but to hold it in place. Fuck. He loved that you loved this. 

“You did great, baby.” He whispered into your ear. “You did so so well.” 

“A…” He loosened his grip when you failed to speak. “Aren’t you going to reward me then?” 

“Of course I am.” He pulled back, fully letting you go, supposedly to allow you to breathe again. But before you could, hand on your head, he pushed you down, forcing you onto your knees. As you quickly stripped out of his favourite jacket, placing it under you to cushion you from the cold floorboard, he unbuttoned his pants, getting ready for your mouth, his favourite place to be. Within seconds, you took over, pulling his pants down and his dick out, spitting in your hand before stroking it slowly. Joshua slapped your hand away and slipped his thumb between your lips prying your mouth open as he pushed his dick into your mouth. 

“Fuck,” He threw his head back. He had missed this warmth of you, wrapped around him. “That’s it baby, that feels fucking good.”

Pleased with yourself, you hummed around his girth and without a warning, his hand finding the back of your head, Joshua pushed himself further in, your sound of surprise lost in your throat. You didn’t struggle too hard to take him all the way in, afterall, Joshua had been here a hundred times already. When he noticed you were running out of breath, he pushed himself just a little further before completely pulling out, throwing you into a coughing fit. Looking at you disappointedly, he shook his head, 

“You can do better baby.” He tilted your face up. “Don’t you want to do better for me?” 

Nodding eagerly, you took him in your mouth again, bobbing your head around his length just the way he liked it, just the way he had trained you to pleasure him. Without him even needing to say it, you clasped your hands behind you, only your mouth working vigorously, alternating between blowing him fast and letting him deep in your throat. Grinning at you, Joshua wrapped your ponytail around his hand, jerking his hips forward to match your pace, finding his orgasm building in him much sooner than usual. 

Of course it did. Joshua was unusually happy today - afterall, everything he intended went according to plan. He had supposedly solved all six of those never ending missing cases, he had secured his promotion and no one even found out that he was the real killer. 

Throwing his head back, he groaned as you skillfully let him so deep in, your nose nearly touching his groin, your face reddening. Dragging you off his cock, he looked down at you impressed, receiving your fucked out expression in return - eyes blown, drool leaking from the corners of your lips, mouth still open, waiting for more. Chucking, he stroked himself. 

“Strip.” 

And you did, pulling your gown over your head, tossing it somewhere far. Then you unclasped your bra, your perfect boobs spilling out of the cups as Joshua felt his mouth water from the sight of it. He had missed them so bad and by the end of tonight, he was going to irrevocably mark them as his. When you looked at him questioningly about taking off your underwear, he shook his head and pushed you against the wall by your shoulders, the back of your head softly hitting the concrete. Knowing what he was going to do next, you obediently stilled as he held your face with both his hands and, god did he fuck it like there was no tomorrow. 

This was what Joshua loved about you the most - you never complained. Anything he gave, you took it oh so well, beyond his expectations, always proving just how devoted you were to him. That was why he was able to use you as the perfect instrument to orchestrate his scheme. Without you, there was no way he would have been able to secure that promotion and get out of this town. 

He had committed too many crimes here, lingered for too long and if he had spent any longer, he knew the chances of him being caught were high. Although he was meticulous in choosing his victims and ensured they had no family or friends to notice their absence, six out of ten of them had landed on his table regardless. Just looking at the case files annoyed him. How the fuck was he supposed to get promoted if solving the very crimes he committed was the only way to deem him worthy? That meant Joshua needed someone else to take the fall, he needed a scapegoat and a story. 

And that’s what everything so far was. Joshua spun an unimaginable, unbelievable story and centered it around you, his main character. He made you a meek, scared and vulnerable woman, just the kind that good old officer Hong would fall for while he himself played a well crafted role - a man tired of unsolvable cases finding his last ray of hope in a woman he happened to fall for. Being a part of a moral battle, guilt tripping his ex-girlfriend into handing him the promotion and coming out of all this with his love being victorious was just the icing on the cake. It was actually all too easy - the accurate decoding of his team’s psyche was what drove the whole plot. 

He knew most of them were highly superstitious and the idea of spirits would terrify them enough to believe your tale. Although the idea of spirits was absurd and haunting, in a small town like this a touch of the supernatural was precisely what was required to get everyone on the edge, to make coincidences believable, to make the unreal seem real. He knew you wouldn’t mess this up - he spent hours telling you about each victim, making you memorise their appearances, their habits, their stories. He trusted you to do a good job, but it was Ji Ho who was the wild card, the one he had taken a risk with. 

Joshua knew Ji Ho being the realist that she was, would never believe the idea of ghosts and would look only for solid facts and evidence. That’s why he had very meticulously planted your DNA in all ten sites, well aware that his ex-girlfriend would immediately suspect you. He wasn’t trying to trap you, no no, you were his favourite doll - he just needed to somehow introduce the twin twist, his most brilliant plot point. 

Joshua was also well aware of Ji Ho's addiction to that stupid Spanish show - it was only a matter of time before she had a lightbulb moment and considered the idea of you having a twin. From there, it was a cake walk - he had already spent months ensuring your sister did not have significant alibis. Thanks to her drug addiction, she was already naturally sketchy, often aloof and most importantly, frequently unaware of her actions and locations. With the deletion of a few CCTV footages, and ripping up some parking tickets and restaurant bills, Joshua had made sure she had no solid evidence to back her innocence. Her being found in a state too far gone to vouch for the truth was no coincidence too - he had been secretly supplying her with stronger than usual doses of drugs for a while now.

And that’s how things went down exactly like he planned - an innocent person was sitting in jail, waiting to be tried for crimes she didn’t commit while here he was, promoted, free and fucking the mouth of the woman undeniably devoted to him. 

Joshua focused his gaze on you, tears running down your cheek, the back of your throat most definitely bruised but you didn't ask him to stop. Instead you contracted your throat around him, drawing out those tell tale groans as he felt himself nearing his high. With a swift movement he let you go and pulled himself out, jerking himself hard as you waited for him patiently, mouth hanging open. The moment you stuck your tongue out desperately, Joshua came, spurts out white coating your tongue, spilling out of the corner of your mouth, down to your boobs. His chest heaved, much like yours, as he took a step back, letting go his softened length as he glanced at you. His masterpiece, the queen on his chessboard. 

Slowly walking back he pulled up a chair, kicking his pants off before settling down on it. He wanted to pause this, let you catch your breath but the ironic thing was, you yourself didn't want to stop. Getting ready to crawl to him, you leaned forward but Joshua shook his head.

“Take a minute baby.” 

You pouted. “I don't want to.” 

“I know but I need to.” He chuckled, looking pointedly at his currently semi hard length. “Do you want to play with yourself till then?” 

Nodding eagerly, you rested back against the wall, spreading your legs out wide, displaying your nearly soaked underwear for him to see. Fuck. Was that how wet you were from just sucking him off? Joshua bet he would slide all the way in with ease and god did he want to. But he could wait - he had all night to wreck you. 

Raising your hips slightly, you pulled your panties, dragging it down your leg, tossing it to join the rest of your clothes. Sucking two fingers, you slid them along the folds, rubbing and spreading them, soft moans leaving your mouth. Joshua could already feel the blood rush down to his dick again. But not yet, he wanted to savour this sight first. 

He watched as you reached for your clit, putting some much needed pressure on it as your head fell back, breath getting shaky and ragged as the feeling built in you. Your free hand found your boobs, squeezing it hard, the remnants of Joshua's cum smearing filthily. The man almost gave in, ready to rail you into tomorrow when coincidentally, the chime of the clock echoed in the room, indicating it was midnight. 

You stopped moving, eyes glancing at the clock before turning to him, lips breaking into a sweet smile. 

“Happy birthday Shua.”

Cocking his head at you, Joshua returned your smile. 

“Happy birthday to you too sweetheart.”

The two of you sharing birthdays, Joshua didn't know whether to call it fate or a lucky coincidence but it was this similarity that drove the entire plot. It all started 4 months ago when he was looking for his next set of victims. He had just finished up with that old woman, Ye Soon, and frankly, all his targets were getting incredibly easy, serving him no excitement, no thrill. 

He had stopped by at the gas station one day, hopping over to the store to buy a pack of gum when he overheard a bunch of young women chattering away about how the end of the year was packed with back to back parties - first with the Mayor's daughters birthday on the 30th, then new years on the 31st. Joshua had smiled to himself. What a perfect way to end the year indeed - a significant figure like the Mayor's daughter would definitely raise the stakes. Oh it would be so fun. 

And fun it was. 

The Mayor's daughter was a beautiful girl and stalking her was more exciting than Joshua anticipated. He didn't think it would be this easy to follow her around but she had an affinity for running away and falling in trouble. Oh she was perfect. But that was something else that was a little more interesting than the silly shenanigans she was up to - Joshua wasn't her only stalker, you were too.  

At first, Joshua thought his eyes were playing tricks. The two of you were strikingly similar, but as far as he knew, the Mayor only had one daughter, not twins. Upon throwing himself into a little more research, Joshua found out about how the two of you grew up in an orphanage but were adopted into different families and to his luck, you were actually a part of his town. Something told him having you on his side might just make all the difference.  

So he began with meeting you almost regularly at the bee farm you worked in. Not many people dropped by there given the bees were quite terrifying but those tiny things were nothing for Joshua, he had bigger things to focus on. Given he was the only person you saw nearly everyday, a friendship began blossoming between the two of you and you slowly started opening up to him, telling him about your life. About how you hated your sister, how you were the one the Mayor wanted to adopt but she had locked you in the storeroom while she took your place and left to live a life full of luxuries. You on the other hand were taken in by two farmers who were negligent, unbothered and died very early in your life in a car crash. Since then you grew up isolated, constantly looking at your sister's life bitterly, knowing that it should have been yours. 

Joshua's joy knew no bounds when he discovered the tumultuous relationship between you sisters. Oh this could be his most elaborate scheme yet, so many birds to hit with one stone. But the first and most important thing he needed for that was for you to be irrevocably in love with him. 

Surprisingly, that was the easiest part. All it took was some praise, some attention and a few sessions of love making - within a month, you were ready to do or die for him. Then all he did was feed you his sorrows - talk about how he wasn't getting a promotion because his ridiculous ex was interfering in his workplace, about how he needed to do something exemplary to climb the ranks. That's how he had convinced you to do this stint - you promised you'd go to any extent for him and in exchange, Joshua promised you revenge. This was your chance to get back at your sister for ruining your life. 

You did however keep asking him who the real killer was. Joshua knew you were head over heels for him, but he wasn't sure if you'd really stick through something as dark as his past. He didn't want to take the chance before his plan came to fruition. But now as he observed you looking up at him with earnest eyes as you fingered yourself, he wondered if you were ready to know more. Sure you listened to everything he said, going faster when he instructed you, stopping when he asked you to, even though you were almost about to cum, you loved him enough to listen. But was it enough to handle more?

He could find out about that later, right now he had enough of looking at you pleasuring yourself, he needed to be inside you urgently. 

“Come here.” 

Standing up immediately, you walked over to him as Joshua fixed his eyes between your legs, at the arousal dripping down your inner thigh. Using your own fingers, he collected your release, slipping them into his mouth, relishing the taste of you. No matter how many times he had eaten you out and made you scream on his tongue, every time felt heavenly. 

Grabbing you by the thighs he pulled you closer and you already knew what you had to do. Turning around, you leaned back against him, grabbing his dick from behind and aligning it with your wanting hole before sinking down on it slowly. 

“It doesn't matter how many times I fuck you.” Joshua groaned, relishing the way your walls fluttered around him. “You're still so tight.” 

You didn't say anything in response, it didn't seem like you could, not with his dick so far in you. 

“Fuck yourself on me baby.” He whispered, his grip on your waist bruisingly tight. “This is your reward.” 

Muttering a string of thank yous, you began moving, rotating and rocking your hips, wantonly squeezing him tight. Joshua knew you were trying to reach for those sensitive spots so he let you, biting and sucking on the soft skin of your shoulder instead, leaving a trail of red. When you began clamping around him unbelievably tightly, he landed a warning smack on your ass.

“Move.”

And you did, bouncing up and down his length vigorously, pouring your everything into it, loud moans tumbling out of your mouth. Squeezing your boob hard, he trailed his hand up your chest, wrapping it around your neck, holding you against him while his other hand found your clit, drawing figure eights. It didn't take you much to fall apart around him considering you had already fucked yourself on your fingers for a while. Joshua could feel your arousal dripping down his length as he continued to thrust his length up. 

“Sensitive…” You whined, holding his hand tight, when he just wouldn't stop. “Shua please…” 

“Shh.” He muttered, pushing you off him much to your surprise before getting up himself and throwing you onto the chair instead, your knees on the seat as your hands held the backrest. Joshua stripped out of his shirt tossing it aside before he smacked you again hard, thrusting himself much deeper inside. 

“Fuck, shua….it's too much.” You nearly cried as he began to snap his hips into you, your orgasm blending into another one. 

“Come on baby.” He softly nibbled on your ear in complete contrast to how roughly he was pounding into you. “Don't I deserve a gift too?”  

You didn't complain after that, only graphic moans and whines escaping your lips. This was the best birthday he could have asked for - here he was finally fucking you after so many days and there, your sister, his final victim was taking her last breath. 

Joshua thought it was rather beautiful, the way it all came to an end. He knew your sister couldn't go more than a few hours without her usual drugs so he had made sure she had access to a little secret stash that she could sniff on when no one was looking. Little did she know, Joshua had poisoned it. 

Not only that, he had also managed to slip a thin folded paper into her pants just before she was thrown in the cell. It read that she was guilty for all ten crimes and was incredibly repentful - she didn't think she deserved to live. That was his final victim of the year - another death on the 30th, another death on their birthday. 

There was no particular reason why Joshua picked this date or why it had to be their birthday - he simply wanted to create a pattern, see if anyone could crack it, if anyone was smarter than him. So far, it seemed like nobody was even close. Perhaps, only after he died and as per requested in his will, if his diary was published as a book, would people know exactly what he was capable of. For now, he alone revelled in and celebrated his intelligence. Maybe you if you were strong enough for it. 

Perhaps not, Joshua wondered as he glanced at you, sound slowly reducing as you inched closer to passing out. Gripping your hips tighter he began fucking you harder and faster, pushing himself to finish before you blacked out. Recognising his pace becoming erratic as he neared his climax, you looked over your shoulder. 

“I haven't been taking the pill for a while Shua…” 

He groaned, not stopping his thrusts. “You know how much I love cumming inside you.” 

“Shua please…” You could barely manage to beg him to stop. Your body had been pushed beyond its limit. 

Owing to your silence, he groaned, jerking his hips, once, then again and then he came, white coating your walls as he emptied himself into you. You fell forward, spent and exhausted as Joshua pulled out, watching his cum drip out of you. 

Fuck. You were perfect. 

This was perfect. 

Everything was perfect. 

It was probably the wee hours of the morning when you woke up, your throat hurting and dry. You rolled your head to the side finding Joshua fast asleep beside you on the bed. He had dragged you here for round two, fucking you into oblivion before moving to round three where he slowly made love, dumping load after load in you. Thankfully, he cleaned you up before sleeping - you had passed out the moment the two of you were done. 

You slipped out of the bed slowly so as to not disturb him, desperate for a glass of water. Stretching, you grabbed the spare blanket and wrapped it around your naked body. Struggling to walk thanks to how sore you were all over you made your way to the kitchen, flipping the switches and bit back a scream. 

Stranding by the counter was an old woman, leaning against it, looking at you like she was waiting for you. Instinctively you grabbed a knife from the nearby drawer, pointing it at her threateningly. 

“W-who are you? And what-” 

“You know who I am.” She said, straightening and stepping closer to the window. Your eyes widened. That was impossible - it was as though the moonlight was passing through her. You ran your eyes over her features. She had white hair, her back was bent weirdly, there was a burn mark on her hand….. Ye Soon. 

“Oh Y/n,” She took a step forward. “Don't you want to know who the actual killer is?” 

You continued to stare, jaw slightly hung, still unable to fathom what was happening. The spirits were a story the two of you had spun, how could it be…

“Who are you talking to?”

You turned around sharply at the sound of Joshua’s voice. He walked out, dressed in his pants, rubbing his eyes as he looked at you confused. 

He couldn't see Ye Soon. 

“You wanted to know the killer didn't you?” The old woman's voice was right by your ear. “Look, there he is.” 

Your eyes widened, grip on the knife tightening as you stared at the man before you wordlessly. Joshua frowned, his eyes flickering between the knife and you as his eyes narrowed. 

Outside, the loud sirens of the ambulance heading towards the precinct resounded in the otherwise quiet town. It seems the story of the Calendar Killer had finally come to an end.

A/n - If you have made it all the way here, thank you for reading, I know it was intense and heavy but I hope you enjoyed it! Do let me know your thoughts in the comments or tags, particularly about the twist - I need to know if my crazy mind managed to pull this off or not hehe You can also read Jeonghan's and Seungcheol's :)

[gguksgalaxy]

0:05am | Joshua 1k

Pining(?) angst, requested by anonymous, request me here

info: The amount of self control i exerted to not make this longer istg

You’re staring. You’re hyperaware of it. You don’t care. Why would you. He’s gorgeous. Joshua sits a few seats to your left, in deep conversation with Seokmin and Soonyoung about his recent trip to Jeju with Seungkwan. Unbeknownst to him, you clung to every word falling from his beautifully shaped lips. The corner’s curl as he smiles, just a bit. Then, he suddenly turns to look at you. Almost like he’d known you were looking at him. 

“You can come sit closer if you want to join the conversation,” he jokes, slight laughter accompanying his words. He cocks his head to the side, waiting. 

With flushed cheeks you shake your head. “I was zoned out, sorry.” 

He smiles wider, nose scrunching up in just that way you adore. God, you adore every inch of him. Does he know? No. Absolutely not, and you’d never tell him. But it doesn’t matter. Your heart feels like it could explode right now.

“No need to apologise,” he says, before turning back to the others. 

Vernon does a futile attempt to turn you back to your original conversation with him, Wonwoo and Mingyu. All you can hear is Joshua’s laughter. The familiar intonation of his voice, just a bit breathy from the alcohol.

And then, Seungkwan interjecting loudly. “Ya, Shua, you should tell them about that girl. The blonde one.” 

You still immediately. Not a single fibre in your being wants to hear what’s about to come out of your crush’s mouth. Without a second thought you stand up, nearly knocking Mingyu’s drink out of his hand in the process. You apologise, circle the table and make your escape. 

“Fuck,” you groan when you reach the backyard. Hands in your hair,you fight the urge to butt your head against the door. How can you keep being this fucking love struck for a guy you’ll never have? Sure, Joshua is your friend, but he’d never be more. He’s way out of your league and has never even shown any interest in you beside that. Yet your dumb heart decided to cling on to him with the last bit of false hope you had. 

His pretty smile, his soft voice, his gentle mannerisms. All of him seemed just too perfect. You were anything but, couldn’t even control yourself and not stare at him whenever he’s near you. Surely your friends have caught on by now. You could’ve sworn Seungkwan at the very least caught on to your liking for his friend. No reason for him to bring up Joshua hooking up with a random chick in Jeju. Not that loudly at the very least. 

You scoff. “Get it together,” you mumble to yourself as you sit down on the porch. The grass beneath your feet is slightly damp, and you find yourself picking at it as you try to fight off the onslaught of feelings. 

“Hey.” Joshua’s voice startles you so much more than it should. “Are you okay?” 

If he is here your escape must’ve not been as smooth as you had hoped. You look up at him, his brow furrowed with worry. “Does a girl sitting alone and tipsy on a porch while plucking at grass look like the text book definition of okay to you?”

He has the nerve to laugh, just a little. And your heart has the nerve to jump. “Listen,” he chuckles, sitting down beside you, “Seungkwan had no right to say that.” God how you’d give to close that little bit of space between the two of you. His words don’t even fully register to you until he continues. “He was lying through his teeth, by the way.” 

“What?” you ask, meeting his eyes again. 

Joshua sighs, leaning back on his hands, averting his gaze up at the night sky. “He said it to get a rise out of you. He told me, while we were in Jeju, that he thought you had a crush on me.” 

You immediately look away, skin flushing all the way down your neck. That little fucker, you’ll have his hide tomorrow. He can’t just fucking do that. Out you to your crush of all things, your crush who is your friend and you see at least once a week. Disgusting.

“Is he right?” Joshua continues. You can feel his eyes on you, painfully so. 

What are you even supposed to reply to that? Say yes and get your heart broken. Say no and you end up risking your one chance. Damn you Boo Seungkwan. “Does it matter?” you ask. 

“Of course it does,” he says immediately. Not a second goes by. He doesn’t even think about it. “If it didn’t matter I wouldn’t be here. I chewed Seungkwan out in there mind you.” He stops, sighing away that little sliver of anger you can hear lining his voice. It’s not hard to imagine him, wide-eyed and shocked at Seungkwan’s words, telling him to shut it. You’ve heard him chastise the others before. But chew them out? Never. And for you?

“Hey.” Then, his hand brushes the back of your head, gently, fingers stroking over your hair. “Look at me,” he breathes. 

You turn, his arm coming to rest on your shoulder as you do. He is so much closer. The warmth of him is welcome, yet stifling. “Why does it matter to you?” 

Joshua cocks his head to the side, corners of his mouth curling up oh so lovely. His eyes shine, lost in thought for a moment. “Because you’re my friend,” he starts. 

You don’t let him finish. Instead, you scoff. Of course that’s all you are. Why did you even think for a second that you could have a chance with him. How could you be so stupid...

A chuckle of your name follows, paired by a light touch to the back of your head again. His fingers carefully brush your hair away from your face. “Look me in the eyes,” he says. It’s not a question, it’s a demand yet it’s so soft, so gentle. 

Again, you look at him, meeting his expectant gaze. “What?”

“It matters to me, because,” he stops, tongue darting out to wet his lips. His next words are anything but hesitant. “If you say no, then I’m going to go back inside to kick Seungkwan’s ass. And then I’ll come back to ask you what’s really upsetting you.” Again, he stops. He caresses your cheek, and you find yourself leaning into it. “If you say yes,” he smiles, unable to help himself, “I’m going to ask you out on a date.”

Request me here | © GguksGalaxy 2018 - 2023

[mikithelibrarian]

Hey! Can request a reader × Lisoo plot, wherein, Lisoo are called to the army station regarding their spouse. They are worried sick and imagine the worst possible scenarios that might have happened to their spouse, since y/n works as a army general. But, upon reaching they see their spouse with a baby, peacefully sleeping on their chest and are informed that Y/N has agreed to foster the baby who's a war refuge. But this is one of the foster fail stories, where they adopt the baby as their own in the end, not able to get separated from the baby. ( Angst with happy ending).

P.S I love your works and it helps my body to pump more happy hormones in my system. 😇

Love,

J

Won´t Leave You - Poly! BLACKPINK Lisoo - GN! Reader

Angst/Fluff

First of all, I'm so sorry about not updating anything in months. Life was just too much and whatever time I could dedicate to writing, the inspiration wouldn't flow as normal, and I didn't want to release something just because I had to.

Anyways, here's your request! I'm very glad you liked my works (And I hope you still do since this request was made around September...)

Anyways, and as some side notes; I've seen other writers put like a list of specific anons, naming them with emojis and stuff, should I open one and call you Captains instead of anons?

And of course, I will still update It Takes Two and AUs.

Extra Note: In this story, we’ll jump a little bit into the future. Jisoo and you will be around 35 years old, while Lisa is 33.

TW: Mentions of war, little bit of strong language (?)

Added code: (Y/CN) - Your Child’s Name (I made your baby gender neutral too, for you to choose what you wanted)

And as another extra note, while I investigated about military ranks and adoption processes, I wasn’t realistic about them in the story, not wanting to over complicate the story legal terms and all that stuff.

Now, onto the reading!

When fate decides to unite different souls, it's difficult to refuse its calling

When they were called to the army base, they expected the worst, and the fact that you took a trip to the front lines to supervise everything didn’t help their nerves. It even came to a point that Lisa started shaking a little bit, crying in the van from time to time, she couldn’t lose you, both of them couldn’t lose you.

Now, imagine their surprise when they saw you there, at your office, asleep on your chair, and with a little baby sleeping on your chest as you leaned backwards. “General (L/N) is very tired as you see” The soldier that escorted them to your office whispered. “But after what they did, I guess they deserved this and months of vacation”

“What did (Y/N) do?” Jisoo asked in a low voice and with a confused tone as she only thought you were there to supervise some things, ‘just a routinary task’ you said.

“The General coordinated our last military operation, we won because of it”

Jisoo and Lisa didn’t seem amused by this new information, but before proceeding to kill you, there was another matter to attend.

“And who is that kid?” Lisa questioned.

“I actually don’t know a lot about the story” The soldier answered “I should let you discuss that privately, I’m afraid I’ve said more than what I should have, if you’ll excuse me”

As soon as the soldier exited the room, Lisa and Jisoo looked at each other and then back at you, debating if they should kill you or praise you, because: number one, you lied to them; number two, you came unharmed and with a victory in your hand; three, you apparently saved a baby and four, you kept the child without at least asking if they’d agree, although, considering you were in, this last point they could look over.

Jisoo walked towards you, while Lisa stayed in her place, and gently shook your shoulder, waking you up after some seconds. You slowly opened your eyes, still feeling your body as if you are carrying a ton of weight, but as soon as you saw the beautiful face of one of your girlfriends, all of it just vanished away… up until you noticed the frown in her face and knew you were lowkey screwed.

Then, you noticed your other girlfriend, Lisa, standing just a few steps away with her arms crossed.

Now… You’ve seen the face of death, met her in the eye and drank a coffee with her as you tell her all about your military career; you’ve been at the wrong side of a gun barrel and saw your life through the inside of a rifle up until it ended on the dim shine of the bullet just at the bottom of it… But nothing could beat the angry face of your partners.

At that sight, you whispered whatever defense you could think of. “Before you think about killing me, I have a baby in my arms who has already taken a liking towards me” None of them talked back at you, making your nerves to skyrocket. “Look, I lied, I actually…”

“We know” Lisa interrupted you. “Let’s discuss this at home” Jisoo nodded, and you sighed, already carefully planning how you could win their forgiveness.

-

“Start” Jisoo instructed you. The three of you at your dining room, both of your girlfriends across you as if they were judging you in a court, all while the baby was still asleep in your room.

“I was called by my superiors to coordinate the last advance of our army, it was an order, not a request. I lied because I knew how risky it was and I preferred that, if I died, you would just know about it all at once instead of torturing for weeks, making you wonder if I’d return alive or not” You put your hands together on the table, nailing your eyes on them, refusing to the meet the couple of stares in front of you. “I was wrong, I know and about that baby in our room… after our victory, some of my soldiers heard crying in one of the alleys and when they went to investigate, well, there was a woman, shot in the back multiple times but who still remembered to fall sideways so she could protect the baby in her arms. When I heard about that, I felt guilty, even if none of soldiers killed her, it happened through the course of my operation, so I offered myself to foster the baby while the government take care of all the papers and authorizations to look for adoptive parents” Sighing, you looked up and saw the small tears forming in their eyes. “I’m so sorry”

“You’ve never lied to us” Jisoo pointed out. “So as long as you don’t make it into a usual thing, I forgive you”

“I do too, but I prefer to know you are in danger instead of just knowing that one day, you’ll never come back to us” Lisa added just before some cries started to echo around the penthouse.

“I’ll see what they need” Jisoo and Lisa nodded before you stood up and went to your room.

“I’ll order food for the baby and…” Jisoo looked at Lisa and put her hand on hers over Lisa’s lap. “…I’ll let you choose their clothing” The Thai smiled brightly.

“I’ll do my best”

-

Some weeks have passed ever since, and your life had drastically turned. You were still working in the army, but you have been less diligent about it, trying to take most of your free time to think about (Y/CN), and yes, along with both of your girlfriends you named the baby, even if you were still fostering them, just like right now.

You were on your coach, baby in your arms and holding the feeding bottle to (Y/CN)’s mouth, Jisoo and Lisa looking at you in adoration.

“I’ll resign from the army” You suddenly said, still looking at the baby, leaving Jisoo and Lisa into a little bit of a shock.

“Why so suddenly?” Lisa asked.

“It’s not sudden, I’ve been thinking about it for a while now, I just didn’t have the courage to imagine a life outside the army, but after what happened in the last operation, the blood that was spilled under my orders, I just feel that this is the right option”

“We’ll always support you” Jisoo smiled at you.

“I know” You stopped feeding the baby and saw how their little eyes looked at you, in pure adoration. You were their protection, almost by instinct they saw you as their shelter, their parent.

That moment would have lasted longer just if your phone hadn’t started to ring scaring the baby. (Y/CN) started to cry because of the sudden noise, making Lisa to stand up and take the baby off your arms and take them into your room so you could talk to whoever was calling you.

As soon as you picked up the phone and listened to the voice on the other side of the line greeting you, you knew what this call was about. So, you just greet them and let them talk as you closed your eyes, confusing Jisoo.

“Have a good day” You ended the call and looked at Jisoo. “A couple has started searching to adopt an international baby and adoption services want to give them (Y/CN)”

Jisoo just nodded and stayed quiet.

This was expected to happen, so, why did you feel like that? Broken?

“Look!” Lisa whispered-yelled as she entered the living room, with a big smile on her face. “I finally managed to calm (Y/CN) down” Jisoo and you looked at Lisa, her happy face breaking both of your hearts even more. “Did something happen?”

“Adoption services want to give (Y/CN) to a couple” Lisa’s smile suddenly disappeared, and her eyes fell on the sleeping face of (Y/CN).

No words were spoken afterwards.

-

That dreaded day has arrived. All the baby things the three of you bought were now packed and ready to be given to adoption services as soon as the ring the bell of your home.

Jisoo was carrying (Y/CN), looking intently at the baby while sitting on the couch, wanting to engrave their face in her mind, with Lisa and you on her sides, doing the same as Jisoo.

“I don’t want to let (Y/CN) go…” Jisoo whispered as her hand very gently caressed the head of the baby.

“I love you (Y/CN)” Lisa sadly smiled.

But you, you were quiet.

Back when you were training, you were taught not to care, to think rationally, to fight and to follow orders, not to against them; but how could you ever do that now?

It was cruel, wasn’t it?

One thing was to have never met (Y/CN), for their biological mother to survive, to never feel this kind of happiness and sadness.

But to meet her, feeling all these emotions and suddenly having to let her go, that was another thing.

The ring of your doorbell sounded across your home, Lisa and Jisoo suddenly tensing up at what that meant, but still, they did not let go, they wanted to hold onto (Y/CN) until the last second.

“I’ll go open the door” You offered and stood up without receiving any kind of response.

All that Jisoo and Lisa wished was to wake up, this had to be a nightmare. It felt too surreal, it broke them to a point where they were questioning why they would let themselves love (Y/CN) if they knew someday, they had to go.

When they heard the door open, Lisa put her head on Jisoo’s shoulder, seeking any kind of comfort.

It felt like an eternity until they heard the door close and some steps getting near them and stopping just behind them. They did not want to look, fearing that as soon as they turn around, they’ll people in fancy suits asking them to give up (Y/CN).

“(Y/CN)’s adoption process has started” Your voice brought with it the start of their worst fear, there was no turning back now, (Y/CN) was no longer under your care. “After some visits to the psychologist and some others from adoptions services for evaluation, they should give us the adoption certificate for (Y/CN)”

Did they hear correctly?

Give us? Us?

Both of them turned around slowly and noticed the lack of any personnel from adoption services.

“(Y/CN) is going to be our kid” Lisa was the first to react and run towards you, jumping into your arms and kissing you all over your face. Jisoo smiled brightly and looked towards (Y/CN), their eyes were open and looking back at her with that spark only (Y/CN) could have.

Jisoo stood up and went towards Lisa and you, getting as close to you as possible. All three of you looked at (Y/CN), finally, without any fear, you could call yourselves their parents.

Once you love someone, you give them a part of your heart, as a proof of that devotion; then, it is no surprise that when they leave you, it hurts like hell. A part of your heart has been taken away, it will take years to repair and even then, you won't be the same one ever again.

[multiphandomunnies]

Jisoo

college au

mafia au

just sleep

rainy day

blushing and candies

kill this love intro

[just-some-random-blogger]

On A Thread

Seventeen CEO!Joshua Hong (Hong Jisoo) x Nurse!Reader Summary: If our love was a piece of string, it was like he took my hand, handed me the scissors, and told me, "cut it." So I did. Word Count: 3k Warnings: Break ups, fluff (if you squint real hard), angst, classism, elitism, exhaustion, toxic relationship i guess, tyPoS bye, etc.

A/N: i really wanted to write angst and it was supposed to be short but 3k is short i guess WTF>SHHFO WFH. Anyway, parts of the premise and a lot of their dialogue towards the end was prompted by some prompts i reblogged before posting this, so you can check it out if you like <:

It was never supposed to be this way. He and I were never supposed to even meet. But we did. And I opened my heart to him.

That may have been the worst thing I've done thus far.

He was like a rose. His fragrance was all consuming. And he grew around me, choking me with his thorns.

The worse thing was, | could not escape him.

Because he wasn't just an ex, he was the food I ate, the clothes I wore, and the serum on my skin; he was the head of the corporation that practically owned all the eye can see.

He was Hong Jisoo of SVT Group, Joshua to his friends, Josh to his closest friends, and... a burning memory now to me. He was the CEO that was second to none that he practically had the nation in his chokehold.

He was a lingering presence that made me shudder, especially on this gruesome night after hours. He was in everyday brands that always had a buy-one-take-one promo, as well as designer brands whose prices seemed to only grow higher.

And I'm honestly thoroughly offended that he ripped the sacred place I had into his iron fists. How dare he shop in the low-lit supermart by my apartment this late at night, knowing what he did, when he could well afford all the exclusive supermarkets near his private village.

Was he that spiteful, when he seemed so relieved to have gotten me out of his life?

What could he possibly need here that was so unavailable to him in his luxury shops?

And how he dare wear the suit ensemble I praised him too many times in when he wore it?

I stood there across the isle, gripping the handle of my shopping cart, looking at him like I was back in school, trying to understand what in the world my teacher just wrote on the board.

I watched as he reached towards the shelf, looking at macaroni, cocking his head, probably wondering to himself if he owned that brand or not. He's done it once before, asses the products while shopping, then put down notes of it on his phone.

It never bothered me, but then again, I suppose maybe it should have, since it was like every waking hour was lived only for his job.

Still, Jisoo had his hair combed and gelled back to a precision I used to love watching unfold. His suit had not a single wrinkle, even after the entire day. His tie was pinned down by something more expensive than my laptop and his collar was cuffed by something more expensive than my entire wardrobe of clothes.

That was who he was. Immaculate and poised. Perfectly polished to a T... and I, I turn to my imitation crocks and fuzzy socks, was this.

I was scrubs and late night shifts and messy hiar buns and convenient store coffee and sweat and tears. We were worlds apart.

Worlds apart.

I did myself a favor and pulled my cart back, moving the opposite direction of him, although I had nothing to so in the laundry soap isle.

This all happened because I was doing my cousin a favor. She was an event planner and currently looking for an new assistant. I used to work with her part-time before becoming a registered nurse, which was why she was quite adamant on getting my help.

She promised a day's pay and Michelin star food from the event itself if I helped her in exchange for me sacrificing my rare day off. After a couple days of persuading, I told Taeyeon I was in, although my heart and body longed for an entire day of sleep.

At the time, I was glad I went to the party, because there had been a choking accident that I was able to remedy. It was of a man who I would call my friend, Yoon Jeonghan, that nearly suffocated on live squid.

And of course, at the time, I was also glad I came because I met the him.

But there have been so many times after our brutal break up were I wondered what would have happened if I turned Taeyeon down and slept in that day. But then I worry that Jeonghan might have not have someone to help him fast enough. So then I wonder what it would be like if Joshua had a call that hindered him from thanking me personally for saving his friend. Maybe then we wouldn't have fallen into small talk, and I wouldn't have told him about this milk tea shop that I loved so much, and he wouldn't have gone there persistently just to have a 'chance' encounter with me.

I couldn't turn my thoughts of him off, even as I ticked my list into completion.

I was on autopilot when I walked towards the register, but then my heart dropped when I saw Joshua standing there in front of the cashier, fishing for his thin wallet in his suit's breast pocket.

My entire body was suddenly pulsing with adrenaline.

I cleared my throat and headed for another lane, although the customer there only begun checking out her items.

It was dreadful when I saw in my peripherals the cashier turn to me, wave, and call out for me to move to her lane, since she was done checking Joshua out.

Fuck, shit, bitch, fucker, fucking shit, what the fuck-

I sucked in a breath and turned to the middle aged lady, beckoning me over to her. I sighed and moved my cart with disdain. I kept my eyes on a bag of chips I got as I made my way.

I avoided all eye contact and started unloading my items for the cashier that I gave but a quick glance and smile to while handing her my reusable bags.

I robotically brought my stuff out.

Dear goodness, maybe I was being too obvious about this.

I sighed as I brushed off the feeling of eyes burning into my skull.

Please don't talk to me, please don't talk to me, please don't talk to me, please don't talk to me, please don't-

By the time I'm halfway through my task, I bravely glace forward, praying he wasn't just stood there watching me.

But I was faced with no one but the woman punching my items and and a man bagging them.

I began to feel heat trickle up my neck and cheeks.

Did he not see me?

Suddenly, I felt so conflicted, hurt, angry by the idea that my presence wasn't even acknowledged.

I scoff lowly at myself and felt my shoulders deflate. The tension in my muscles relaxed, but not in a relieving manner. I suddenly, so stupidly, felt my eyes begin to glass as well. I rub my them, thinking about how horrible and exhausted I felt.

I thought about how much I wanted to go to sleep, and how much I wanted to get a hug, and how I had no one to give me one.

I sniffle and release a breath, smiling at the cashier when she tells me my total. I pay her, then get my things, automatically telling her to have a good day as well, though I clearly meant none of it.

With my two bags in hand, I step out of the supermart and look up to the sky, out of habit. It was a bare night sky, with no stars nor clouds. Boy, was I glad I didn't have work tomorrow.

It was instantaneous when brought my sights back eye level. There I saw, across the street, the dark grey car with tinted windows and shiny silver wheels that seemed cleaner than my apartment as it reflected the street light.

He was there, hands in his pockets, leaned back on the side of his million dollar car.

We made eye contact and he raised a hand at me.

A hand? What was I supposed to do with that?

My brows furrow involuntarily.

I nearly choke when he straightens his stance and asks, "do you need a ride?"

Do I need a ride?

Wow.

Do. I. Need. A. Ride?

From. Him?

How could he ask me that?

I grip my things and ready to leave, but-

Oh crap, he was walking towards me.

My entire body was burning to run, damn, my brain was yelling furiously to run. But it was like I was stuck in a conundrum of unfathomable cause and I was frozen in place, unwitting, completely helpless.

Suddenly, he was in front of me, looking down at my form as if I was a pathetic juvenile incapable of doing something so simple.

His smooth skin was offensive to me, and so was his too familiar cologne that made my stomach drop for far too many different reasons that I should work on nullifying.

Jisoo corrects himself, "let me give you a ride."

I look at him. He watches me. He then moves even closer, to get the bags in my hand. That seemed to be the only point I had the will to move. It was the tipping point for my reason to return.

I pull back and quickly retort, "no."

Jisoo halts as I recoil from him and give him a look.

It was then I have the spine to gather myself and walk past him.

I am foolishly held back by his question, "why not?"

I clench my jaw and turn to him, blinking far too much, "I feel like I can't breath when I'm around you."

For the second time, Jisoo corrects himself, "please, let me drive you home."

I turn away from him, shaking my head, "what are you even doing here?"

He moves back in front of me, digging his hands back into his pocket, "they have a chip here that isn't available anywhere else."

I snort. I don't believe him.

"Believe me, I've looked."

His sentiment makes me realize that I've been awake for 20 hours and my head feels like it was about to fall off. It made me recall how obsessive he could get about his ideas or when he liked something, how he literally bought two industrial boxes of candy that I introduced him to because he enjoyed it so much.

I involuntarily yawned, eyes misting. I felt like dropping down and crying and sleeping right this moment. Now that I was faced with the option of not walking, I didn't want to walk at all.

But then my misty eyes were cleared by the image of his face, with the very soft features that tore me to pieces.

"I'll let you drive me if you promise not to come back here."

He was surprised by this. I was too tired to care or explain.

We both new he had absolutely no reason to even go do something as trivial as shopping for groceries since his literal assistants had assistants.

And yet here he was, shocked by my softly spoken demand.

"Okay."

I blink at him with tired eyes and make my way to his car.

In no time at all, Jisoo was driving me back home. I really didn't want to, but I easily fell asleep on the passenger side since the smell and feel as so familiar, and again, I was about to pass out. It helped that I felt kind of warm as I hugged my bags in my arms.

Josh had always been a good driver. There were times were I would doze of and kind of surprise myself when I woke, that I was actually in a car and not on in a chair at home.

But then I shot awake and yelped when the car suddenly halted and Jisoo barked profanities as he honked at someone caught in his headlights.

He quickly brings the window down and screams, "HEY, GET OUT OF THE ROAD!"

The evidently drunk dude raises the can in his hand and nods, scurrying off the road.

Jisoo sighs and closes the window, continuing his route. He turns to me with a pinched expression, "sorry about that. Go back to sleep."

I shake my head, "it's okay. I'm glad you didn't give him a ticket to the ER."

"The bastard might give himself one though," he clicks his tongue.

For a while, there was only the sound of the car in the atmosphere. I appreciated it, though there was tension.

When we reach a red light, Joshua pulls up the break and leans back. I look to to the window to my right.

"Do you still work the same times?"

I freeze.

"You don't have a shift tomorrow, right?"

Why is he talking to me?

"They replaced that microwave in the pantry, I would assume."

I turn to him and nod.

He turns to me just then, nodding back, "Dr. Lee would appreciate it-- or, maybe she hasn't seen it yet, since she might have already given birth."

What are you doing, Jisoo?

Stop it.

He sighs, placing his hands on his steering wheel, "you didn't answer my previous question."

I knit my brows and shake my head, "I don't have work."

"Good. You look exhausted."

"Thanks."

He doesn't respond.

I turn back to my right, letting a moment pass. I continue, "for the ride. Thanks. For driving me home."

He turns to me and opens his mouth, silent for a second, "I don't know what else I can do."

I knit my brows, holding back a laugh, But I can't help but chuckle in a way that sounds empty and pathetic in my ears.

For some reason, he goes on and says, "I really did want those chips."

I finally turn back to him and see him looking at me. "I didn't say you didn't."

Joshua's face hardens, "well you asked me not to come back there."

I chuckle again, "what else did you expect?"

He doesn't answer, as the red light turns green.

I get it. I really did. As much as I had things on my mind, he had things on his. But it was completely uncalled for and unfair of him to say this in his car as he's driven me home and pulled up in front of my apartment.

In the silence, I decide to just turn for the door and leave.

"Maybe I shouldn't have met you," he muttered, I think to himself as I was about to go, but it wasn't soft enough. I heard him, and it stabbed through my aching heart like a burning dagger.

I turn to him, dumbfounded, even more awake that I was a while ago. My eyes were suddenly brimming with tears that began to fall without my consent.

"What?" I whisper brokenly.

Joshua turns from his lap to me in bewilderment. In this moment he sees me crying, he's realized what he's done. His own eyes begin to water, and yet he persists, "if it were my choice, I never would have approached you."

I scoff, feeling my chest unimaginably tighten, "except it was."

"I talked to you for Jeonghan."

"Yes, and you kept talking to me!" I whine. I sniffled and wiped my hears with my wrist, "you gave me your card, which I never called, and went to my favorite milk tea house."

Jisoo turns away.

I chuckle in disbelief and shake my head, gripping my things and turning to the door, "I'm tired of cleaning up your messes."

"You are so naïve," he mutters lowly.

"How am I naïve huh? You liked me just as much as I liked you!" I snap back. "Don't pretend like this is my fault."

Jisoo turns back, his own tears were streaming down his face, "so it's my fault?"

"No!" I quip, "it's no one's fault!" I groan, "it's everyone's fault! It's," I break into a sob, "it's how it is..."

And how exactly was it?

It was this. How he had a car that could buy me my dream house. How his shoes cost more than my rent. How I refused to buy new shoes though these cheap, fake crocks were about to say goodbye because my mom brought it for me. How his friends became my friends because of how often I meet them, and how lonely I felt after we broke up because I realized I centered my world around him.

How he thought minimum wage and contractualization was fair. How he argued healthcare couldn't possibly be free.

He was kind and caring and romantic, but he was calculating and very clear that I was always going to be second to his career. All the dates for his work events came easy to him. He knew exactly what date it was because of it, and yet he would never seem to find it in him to recall that I asked him to pick up something for me, or that we were supposed to spend the night together.

"My mother was right about you," he said. I nearly vomited at the idea of that wretched woman who hated me for being with his beloved son. I felt betrayed because after all the time I've spent with him, defending him from his own mother that even he could never seem to satisfy, he was taking her side.

He took another jab, right in the jugular, "you really would ruin my life."

I scoff and chuckle dryly, "so far, you have only proven me right." I unbuckle my seatbelt and open the door, "forget it. Just like you forget everything else."

"Wai-"

I step out of the car and give him one last look, "I hope one day you love someone who isn't as worthless as me."

I slam the door and shiver as the cold creeps up my spine.

Joshua watches helplessly as he watches what looked like a lifeless body walking away. He groans in frustration and slams his hands on the steering wheel, accidentally honking the horn, making the walking figure jolt.

He freezes when he realizes his nth mistake of the night.

He breaks into a long string of profanities and shakes his head, nothing but denial leaving his lips, "it was never supposed to be this way."

He wants to jump out of his car and run after what he had been crying about for days, but he let the emotions he bottled up get the best of him tonight, and now he's said everything that's on the tip of his tongue without the proper context.

He is defeated and resentful of no one but himself, "I don't think you're worthless. Why would you tell yourself that?"

[luvshuas]

when did you stop loving me?

pairing - joshua x reader

tags - angst

synopsis - you never thought a relationship could be picture perfect, until you met joshua hong. but even that must come to an end.

word count - 873

notes - hi, i’ve had a very difficult year. i just needed an outlet. this also didn’t go through any sort of editing process i literally wrote it like 10 minutes ago…..

He was the sunlight in an overcast sky, beaming down on you, warming you, giving you hope. Being with him felt natural, like something you were always meant to do. The way he loved was nothing like you had ever experienced before. It was new. It was invigorating. It was all you thought you were missing, and when he was gone, it was all you found yourself missing. His love was all you craved. It made you feel capable of being loved. The way he paused what he was doing to look at you for a moment, when he would send you emojis of hearts just to see your name light up his phone with an identical heart, how he’d remind you that you’re the loveliest person he has ever known, how he promised to spend the rest of his life with you and make you happy till your final days. These were all ways Joshua Hong showed you his love. These were all things you fell in love with.

However, the honeymoon stage would pass by. He would still remind you of his love, still look over at you when he was busy, still tell you how pretty you look, and how lucky he was that you were his. It wasn’t the same, though. These messages would come less and less, until he would stop seeing for weeks at a time, and when he would see you it was only after days of pleading with him to be with you. His messages became scarce, only a good morning text when he woke up, a reminder that you’re pretty, and then asking how you felt that day. Your conversations would be reduced down to single-word responses that held no emotion, all the while he was telling his friends about you and bringing you up with his parents at any chance he got. On those days, when he would act like how he used to, you found yourself filled with hope at the chance of things reverting to how they used to be. However, the next day your messages and requests to see him would be met with silence.

You let this continue on for months, hoping things would get better. They had to get better, you thought. Losing him wasn’t an option. He was all you had. He was all you wanted. His love was the missing piece you had been searching for your entire life. You didn’t want to know what you would do if you had lost this love, but a part of you began to prepare for when you would lose this love. Your mutual friends talked about it. They would whisper about emptiness in your tone, the hollowness in your expressions. Only three of them would ask for the cause of this sudden change in demeanor–which wasn’t as sudden as they made it out to be. You told them the entirety of your love story with Joshua. They learned of all of the highs and the lows. They learned how much his love filled that empty place in your heart, and how much it healed and then broke you all over again. They all gave you the same response: let him go. But you couldn’t. You wouldn’t. He was the greatest love you had ever known, that you would ever know. You weren’t prepared to lose him, so you tried once more to break into the barriers he formed between the two of you. You pleaded with him to talk, until he finally did. For hours, you and Joshua talked about the last few months and what was happening in your relationship. By the end of it, he promised he would do better. He promised he would prove to you that he loves you.

And he would. He would prove to you that he loved you. From that day, you noticed him returning to how he used to act. He began to make an effort to see you again, he would remind you how lovely you are, he would consistently tell you how much he loves you. Once again, everything felt perfect. You were as happy as can be. The person you loved most in the world loved you again. Until he didn’t.

Slowly, you noticed the cycle begin to return. You felt helpless this time, knowing you couldn’t find it in you to try to fix everything alone ago. You wanted to end everything quickly, to tell him you knew he didn’t love you anymore. But you couldn’t bring yourself too. You wanted to continue to pretend that he loved you, to keep him to yourself for just a while longer, despite knowing he would be someone else’s great love soon. His love would shatter you by the end of it all, but you didn’t want to think about it. You would endure every painful, lie-filled reminder of his love, because that is all you could do. You would hold onto Joshua Hong for as long as you were able to, for there would be no love as perfect, or as fulfilling, as that of the boy who looked at you with stars in his eyes. He would be your undoing, and you were willing to accept that.

[jigujellee]

I'VE LET IT GO (DON'T LET ME GO) -> you've finally broken free from all the memories. or have you?

jisoo x reader angst word count: 1k warnings: none

a/n: a short one for jisoo in honour of snowdrop being released soon! i kind of rushed through this, but i hope you enjoy it still &lt;3 (also, italics indicate past conversations!)

i object!

you wanted to scream it out so badly. the whole church needed to know that you didn't want this to happen, but why couldn't you say it? what was stopping you?

it's the stupid smile on her face. that's what stopped you.

she looked at him with eyes full of love and adoration, like no one else in the room mattered. but you don't hate him, in fact, you believe he's the perfect person for her. he's everything she ever wanted and everything you couldn't be. you weren't angry yet your heart was screaming in pain and agony as you watched as the one you loved most exchange her vows with the man she loved most.

"you're getting married?"

it was hard to hide the shock on your face. you didn't expect him to propose so quickly since they've only been dating for a little over a year, but what surprised you most was the fact that she said yes. you knew she liked to take her time with things, and she even told you she wasn't in a rush to get married. but here she was, smiling and screaming with joy while looking at the new ring that sat on her finger.

"yes! isn't this exciting y/n? we're growing up so fast! i never thought i'd get married so soon!" she says with such joy. the smile on her face, the very smile that made her eyes turn into crescents, made it clear that she has no regrets and won't turn back.

"i'm so happy for you jisoo" you say as you engulf her in a hug, trying to sound as sincere as possible. you were happy for her, you really were. you just wished it had been you that proposed to her and that it was you she said yes to.

the sound of music blaring could be heard all the way from the entrance of the banquet hall. family members, friends, and other guests piled their way into the large room that was beautifully decorated with all sorts of flowers and lights. as you walked in and made your way to your seat, you looked around and couldn't help but feel nostalgic. memories of your conversation with jisoo started to flood your mind.

"what do you want for our wedding y/n?"

you chuckled at the sudden question but it managed to give you a wave of butterflies in your stomach. the thought of marrying her was something that you've always dreamed of, and you wouldn't want to marry anyone else but her.

"i actually never thought about it. i just know i want to marry you." now it's jisoo's turn to feel the butterflies in her stomach. you always knew how to woo her with your words.

"what about you, love? what do you want our wedding to be like?" you continued.

"it doesn't need to be anything grand like a million dollar wedding. i just want it to be with our friends and families, and we'll get married in a church before partying in a hall that's decorated with really pretty flower arrangements and a lot of lights!"

it was exactly as she described it. jisoo was having her dream wedding and your heart was full of joy, knowing she got everything she wanted. but your heart also ached with sadness because even though she planned the wedding with you, it wasn't you she ended up marrying.

the rest of the night was filled with good food, dancing, and watching one of your friends give their partner a lap dance. a couple of drinks helped you feel somewhat better, but everything came right back when you heard her voice from behind you.

"y/n, you made it!" jisoo says as she tightly wraps her arms around you. you do the same as you nuzzle your face into her neck.

"i wouldn't miss it for the world," you reply before pulling away.

"so what do you think? it's just as we planned it right?" the word we coming out of her mouth makes your smile falter slightly, but luckily she didn't catch it.

"it's amazing jisoo, i hope it's everything you wanted" she smiled and nodded eagerly.

"it's the perfect wedding! and it's even more perfect because you're here"

please don't say things like that to me, you thought. just as you were about to open your mouth to say something, jisoo's now husband joins the conversation.

"y/n, hi! i'm so glad you could make it," haein says. it doesn't sound fake or forced. he was genuinely happy to see you and you hated it because you didn't want to like him. but he was a good man for jisoo and you knew that, so how could you hate him?

"i'm glad to be here! thank you for the invite"

"of course i'd invite my best friend! what do you take me for, an idiot?" jisoo jokes and you giggle in response. you couldn't say anything else to them as watching them with their hands interlocked made you want to vomit, scream and cry.

"well, enjoy the party y/n! i can't wait until you get married one day," jisoo says before making her way to the dance floor with haein. you stood there and watched as they slow danced together, and you hate to admit that they looked really good for each other.

you've spent years trying to convince yourself that you were able to let jisoo go, and for a moment, you really believed that you really did. but watching the happy couple in front of you made you realize that you were never able to let her go. and if you were being honest with yourself, you don't know if you will ever be able to let go.

[wantthisusernamepurrr]

☆ suffer.

sub!jisoo , femdom!reader, smut.

you got in the car and called jisoo, after a long day you wanted a bath and some sweet cuddles from the love of your life, but she didn’t answer. so you tried again, “soo pick up..” you groan as the phone kept ringing through your ears. after a while you grew irritated and gave up on calling her. “what could she possibly be doing?”

once you got home you got your things out of the car and unlocked the door. “jisoo?!” you shout from the front door. nothing... you dropped your things and walked down the hall the living room was dark only lit by candles. a small smirk appeared on your face and you walked down to the room.

“baby?” you opened the door a peeped inside. you saw her lying in bed on her stomach. wearing your favorite set of lingerie. jisoo turned around a looked at you. “well good evening to you too princess.” you chuckle closing the door behind you and sitting next to her on top of the rose petals.

“baby, i’ve missed you so much.” jisoo climbs into your lap giving you a few kisses on your lips. you couldn’t help but smile and lock your arms around her waist. “how are you feelings? do you need a bath? you’re quiet what’s wrong?” she rambled making you chuckle. your finger covered her pretty lips.

“mommy is alright, but i could use a bath, only if you join me first.” you whisper giving her bare collar bone a few kisses. she nodded in content and slowly started to unbutton your jeans. “let’s do something first. mommy wants to touch you.” you whisper and lay her on her back.

jisoo gasps as your cold fingers went straight for her heat. rubbing her through her panties and attaching your lips to her neck. you bit down lightly leaving her skin a little red before moving to her stomach. “does my precious little puppy taste good today?” you ask her watching her nod in agreement.

“i cleaned up extra good today. just for you mommy.” jisoo lets out, spreading her legs farther apart as you move the panties to the side. her clit completely exposed to you. “i’ve been a really good girl recently mommy.” jisoo rambles on as you stare at her red, wet pussy. biting your lip, you nod, leaning in to leave a few sweet kisses on her.

she moans a small moan as her hands go directly for her breasts. she kneads them together and you suck hard on her clit. “ah- ah fuck.” she tilted her head back while resting on her elbows. you sent vibrations along her body as you hum in content with her pussy. “yes—baby, right there.”

resting your hand on the pit of her stomach and using your thumb to rub it gently. “easy princess, i’ll take care of you.” you whisper kissing up her stomach and then her lips, allowing her to taste herself. “do mommy a solid and go run a bath for us.” you slap her pussy a few times.

jisoo did as told, quickly rushing to make the water just how you like it then called for you. you stood up and walked locked the room door, walking into the bathroom and stripping oh her clothes. you walked behind jisoo, unbuckling her bra and slapping her ass. “you’re so fucking hot.” you whisper in her ear.

a small blush coated the girls face. you stepped in the tub and gestured for her to do the same. playing with the toy on your finger and pressing the button, you saw how jisoo’s face lit up from the vibrations of it. “get in and ill give you the time of your life.” you whisper sexily towards her.

stepping in, she sat down between your legs. automatically, you spread her legs, rubbing her clit with your index finger. “be loud for mommy okay?” jisoo nods, just ready for you to touch her. her body was steaming as she rocks her hips with your finger. biting her neck, and pressing the vibrator directly on her clit.

jisoo’s head laid on your shoulder. she kept her hand on her side and bit her lip. you stroked her hair, slipping your ring finger into her hole and pumping it. “shit- it feels... ahh.” jisoo moaned louder as you pressed down harder on her clit with the toy. a louder moan left her lips and she gripped the sides of your thighs. “mmfh.” she whines.

you look don at her pussy, seeing how red it was through the water and feeling her clench around your finger. “close already baby?” you snicker and pull the toy away. she sighs and looked away, shaking her legs in irritation. “a good girl shouldn’t have to tell me shes been a good girl.” you say sternly into her ear. 

jisoo freezes, she knew she was caught. “a good girl doesn't send me videos and pictures in the middle of a meeting. my pretty slut wanted to be fucked so bad huh?” another chuckle left your lips. “you’re going to suffer pretty baby.”