#joirnal

[chloelouygo]

Journal page setup for next week! I suck at using Tombows, I just can't vary my pen pressure enough to get the amazing bujo aesthetic for writing 😅

[caterpillow]

paws🐾

[water-of-the-rain]

sketchbook vibe pages <3

[spleling]

I miss university

[r-o-s-e-king]

Without chanelle i honest to god don’t think life is really worrh living anymore. I loved her more than anything or anyone. She was the only thing that made this house a home. She was the only one who showed me true unconditional love in my family. Mom said i wont find someone decent because of what a freak i am, parenthetically speaking. Also that it would be cruel to have kids if I chose to have a male partner because my kids would be bullied and we would be judged. I just want to die basically lol. She said “you think japan will just solve everything but it wont.”

[chasing-ukiyo-blog]

things never really go my way...

and you know what? 

that’s ok.

life isn’t really supposed to go the way we imagined it to or go the way we planned.

i struggled for years and years and finally, when Allah answered my duaas, i thought that the outcome was going to be totally different, totally perfect.

things are definitely nowhere near perfect and things are definitely not the way i had ever imaged them to be.

but you know what? 

everything worked out imperfectly, perfect. Perfect because it is all Allah’s plan and imperfectly because i am a human being who doesn’t have any grasp of the unseen and because of my many flawed perceptions of this dunya. 

things never really will ever go my way, and that’s ok, because in the end, Allah is the one who takes me along this journey and has everything already written for me. the more i expect and imagine things to go differently, that’s when i will bring heartache upon myself.

i have to just trust the process.

i have to trust Allah.

sigh, i wish things would go my way but i know that because i am imperfect, i can’t see the evil and harm that Allah can see. Because I’m imperfect , i will never fully understand why things go the way they do . I can’t understand but I can accept it .

May Allah always allow me to be content and pleased with all that He has given me and may He always have mercy on me and bless me with good in this dunya and akhirah, Ameen.

[thefourcrafts]

Can’t wait for my favorite month of the year to come! How are you doing? 😊

[faiteach]

Photos from hiking this weekend 190331