#life scripts

[johariswindow]

Life Scripts

Life Scripts are guidelines, rules, behaviors, attitudes, values, or beliefs that are determined by those closest to us. These could be parents, legal guardians, teachers, mentors, and other authority figures in our lives that we model after. These Life Scripts are an invisible/unspoken code of conduct that we all follow, which are unique to each individual person based on their childhood experiences and upbringing. Often a byproduct or result of socialization and one of many theories on identity formation.

[blogparanormalexpresso2stuff]

Near-death experiencers (NDErs) tell of their life scripts / soul contracts in this revealing look at what they agreed to, how it played out, and the cognitive dissonance along the way...

[nctrnm]

#NowPlaying: " PREMIERE | Common Factors - Protect Express Regulate [Life Scripts] 2021" by 44,100Hz Social Club

[nctrnm]

#NowPlaying: " PREMIERE | Common Factors - Parapraxes [Life Scripts] 2021" by 44,100Hz Social Club

[himnit]

Each person is a world unto her/himself and none of what they do to you is because of you; it's because of themselves. We have nothing to do with it (and vice versa). But we tend to assume otherwise: that we live in the same world or that they know our world and then, in turn, we assume the same. Sooner than you know, it's a spiral, of you know what.

Random musings

[mentalarts]

There's the Easy Way, The Hard Way, and However I End Up Doing It

Scripts are like a blue print for development - there's a usual way things transpire for most people.  In other words, most people do things at around the same ages/stages of their lives.  There is actually a template designed for whatever normal is, at least psychologically.

There's the way most people go...and then there's the way I go.

Some people are able to maintain the illusion that they have their lives together.  Some people are always visibly fighting against...something.  Some people flounder, figure it out for a bit, flounder some more and then somehow turn out okay in the end.  I belong in the third group.  There's a lot of tripping in the third group, generally over one's own feet.

I have never been in love.  I am 26 years old and it just hasn't happened for me.  To be fair, I haven't exactly helped myself any in this area and haven't had much opportunity to.  I'm working on it, but it's an area in my script that continues to be poorly developed.

I feel like I missed some steps along the way.  It seems that everyone else learned to flirt and comfortably speak to members of the sex they are attracted to while I was doing something else (let's be honest, I was probably sleeping).  While some people seem to find this effortless, I'm falling all over myself, talking way too much, trying desperately to read another person who I'm already convinced probably hates me.  I seem to lose my ability to act like a functional human being.

You know how if you think about how you hold your hands naturally you suddenly can't do it in any way that looks remotely natural (are they normally on my face)?  That's what happens to me when I am around a guy I'm even slightly attracted to - except it's my whole body I'm suddenly unsure of and my basic conversation skills that go out the window.  I'm super fun and surely seem naturally confident and sincere.

My script is different than the others.  I'm watching friends get married, enter into serious relationships, have babies, and buy houses.  Meanwhile, I'm just hoping to meet a nice, single, guy who is also interested in me (a tall order, it seems).  

I regularly make a mess of things, tripping over my own insecurities and fears and anxieties.  I would love to follow the usual route sometimes, but it's just not in the cards for me.  Sometimes it really bothers me, other times it doesn't bother me nearly as much.  

I'm going to figure this out, although, I'm not sure that's really possible.  I'll meet a good guy when the timing is right.  Timing is a nightmare but it's one I have no control over.

Let's see how this script plays out...what else is there to do, right?!

[lancevance]

few things tho, lately, i really hadn't been around here much because i felt i needed a break from this place and i can go on and on about various problems i have about tumblr but i won't because those complaints aren't necessary (and my complaints are pretty petty tbh) but yeah i just needed a break so i took one. however, i did maintain a presence on twitter which naturally became the go to place for what were once my tumblr text posts. needless to say, i feel much better and greatly benefitted from chilling out and doing other things and now i can come back. mostly tho i guess i missed the people here, y'all are so loving :)

consequently, i probably missed a slew of content during my break so don't expect me to catch up or know whatever's been happening in the past week and a half. feel free tho to update me on your lives since i probably cannot collect all the missing pieces by myself.

[pearlwithin]

Life is good. But I didn't always tell that story

The sun is shining, I've been on a few errands, I've not been glued to Twitter/Facebook/a computer screen all morning and I've had a lovely lunch with my husband at our favourite local restaurant. And in an hour I'm going for a massage at my local spa. Life is good. That's the story I'm telling myself today, and indeed the story I tell myself on most days. It wasn't always like this, though. As we munched our way through a delightful fishcake, I told my husband the story of my nervous breakdown. OK, I'll admit that nervous breakdown might be a slight overstatement (that's another story) but it was certainly a major burnout and one of the lowest points of my life - at least that's how my memory is creating the current narrative. I was in my early 30s and had been the editor of a pop magazine (Record Mirror) for about 18 months. While on many levels it was an exciting and glamorous job, it was not one to which I was best suited. I absorbed responsibility like a sponge and never learned how to delegate, thus leaving my deputy with little to do while I struggled to cope with the workload. My colleagues, most of whom I considered to be friends, treated me differently when I was their boss. This was a psychological shift that had taken me unawares and I felt rejected and alone. As I was a people-pleaser I tried to involve everyone in the decision-making process when all they wanted was leadership. To compensate, I partied too hard and that, combined with stress, tipped me over the edge. I woke up one day and realised I couldn't do it any more. The doctor diagnosed nervous exhaustion and put me on antidepressants. I resigned a month later. The story I told myself for years afterwards was that I wasn't cut out for the top job, I must avoid stressful situations, I couldn't take on a responsible position again and I certainly wasn't a leader. This narrative resulted in a long period of hiding in the shadows and not fulfilling my potential. In fact it's only now that I feel I'm getting anywhere near coming out into the light. That's how powerful these life scripts can be. So I ask you again. What stories are you telling yourself? Are they good ones or are they holding you back? Don't let them push you into the shadows - the world needs your light.