TW: MENTAL HEALTH; PTSD-RELATED PAST REFERENCES; ADDICTION REFERENCES; CANNABIS REFERENCES
Follow along with all the focus and connection my ADHD, Bipolar II, and always learning mind has to offer as I try and navigate all the levels of metaphor and introspection that my deck - the beautiful Star Spinner Tarot Deck by Trungles - has to offer. You can also check out the small, but growing community of advocates, educators, services, and individuals all dedicated to supporting care, change, and cannabis! Feel free to add along your own interpretations to offer a different perspective, more experience, or to practice your own skills.
So, I've recently gotten into Tarot and I'm trying to find a way to put all my ideas about my personal readings into one place and since I use Tarot as a metaphysical tool for self-reflection, self-care, and most importantly, recovery, I figured that this blog, which is dedicated to building a community focused on just that, is a good place to try and start!
Follow along with all the focus and connection my ADHD, Bipolar II, and always learning mind has to offer as I try and navigate all the levels of metaphor and introspection that my deck - the beautiful Star Spinner Tarot Deck by Trungles - has to offer. You can also check out the small, but growing community of advocates, educators, services, and individuals all dedicated to supporting care, change, and cannabis!
I've done a few different readings before, mostly for myself, which I still feel the most confident doing, but the one pictured above that I tried for the first time this morning, is included in the handbook with my Tarot deck. It is the simple 4-card spread, and I've indicated what each card I drew is and which number it was in the graphic above!
The first thing I do, before shuffling or anything to do with the cards, is take my morning dose of cannabis, and my two other pharmaceutical medications. The second thing I do is sage the spot I do my readings, to ensure a positive and encouraging space for my reading. I like to sit on the floor, cross-legged, and lots of space in front of me, with music at the 432hrz level playing on YouTube, and a daily blend of essential oils in the diffuser.
I like to shuffle the cards and really focus on the action until I feel that it is time to stop; sometimes this starts like a tingle in my fingers, or the cards feel heavy or sticky - sometimes they will fall apart or not fold back together, and I'll select the card that is presenting itself. If none jump out at me, I like to stack the shuffled deck to my left in front of me, then spread the cards out horizontally, fanning them out as far and as they will let me undisturbed. Sometimes it flows smoothly with all 81 spread out in front of me, but more often than not the deck usually is stopped before half way and the cards make themselves apparent to me. Sometimes I wonder if I second-guessed myself and picked the wrong one, but then I try and remember that whatever card I picked up was the card I needed to see - that's how I've made Tarot make sense to me, at least!
The next thing I do is observe the cards for their more unnoticed features first; I'm still new with my deck so I have to look up each card's specific meaning in the handbook. I'm trying to learn to read more into what the cards are showing me in terms of colour, numbers, animals, doubles, contrasts, imagery, etc., so before I have any biases from the card descriptions, I'm trying to remember to look beyond the obvious by looking at the obvious at it's most basic first.
1/2 the cards are yellow; yellow indicates happiness, vibrancy, joy, positivity, strength, optimism; it's interesting to note that the most yellow cards are both in reverse, and that there is noticeable and significant yellow imagery (swords, moon, crown) within the two blue cards. The yellow cards are the first two.
1/2 the cards are blue; blue indicates intuition, emotion, communication, subconscious, peace, wisdom, dreams; there is no blue tones whatsoever in the yellow cards. The blue cards are the last two.
2 Queens; 1 in Reverse (Wands), 1 Upright (Swords); the presentation of 2 Queens indicates a sense of rivalry. There are red flowers on both of the Queens; red symbolizes power, strength, passion, confidence, inspiration, creativity, strong will. The Queen of Swords has the flowers and the serpent - a white snake is with her (Macbeth reference?), and a brown lion is behind the Queen of Wands.
2 cards in wands (the first two); wands reference energy and movement, career and creativity, passion - it's corresponding element is fire.
There are 2 cards in swords (the last two); swords represent thoughts, how you communicate with others, things causing stress - it's associated element is air.
The split in the cards and the imagery associated with the two different sides makes me think of a split of youth vs. maturity.
4 of Wands - 4's indicate structure, foundations, impasse, stability, planning. The associated Major Arcana are Death and The Emperor; harmony vs. dissonance.
7 of Swords - 7's indicate faith, wisdom, change, evaluation, reflection, understanding; the associated Major Arcana are The Chariot and The Tower; long term vs. instant gratification, patience vs prudence.
What Do They Say? (Handbook Definitions)
IV of Wands - Reverse: The Querent (Myself). This card in this position indicates unsteady foundations, and that I should seek certainty. There has been a break down in communication within my inner circle; someone may think they are committed to something but subconsciously or secretly have doubts.
Queen of Wands - Reverse: The Past. This card in this position represents the trait of self-righteousness; while passionate and accomplished, I have a hard time admitting when I am wrong. My core beliefs are inconsistent; I am brilliant but unreliable and choose to use my influence for pettiness.
VII of Swords - Reverse: The Present. This card in this position indicates that someone has seen through my ruse; I am not as clever as I believe. I'm forgetting important details, and my lies will be laid bare. My efforts to get ahead will fall through due to my tactlessness and my inability to see things as they are; I am in deep denial.
Queen of Swords - Upright: The Future. This card in this position indicates someone that is poised and intellectually rigorous, organized, perceptive, and a quick-thinker. Someone who is tactful, sharp with their communication and with that trait, able to peel back the layers of others with kind honesty.
Annnnnd then that was as far as my brain was able to take in from my read that morning. Sometimes I'm able to process my reads in the moment and pull what I need from them then, but other times I need to sit on it for the day, or a few, to really be able to understand what the cards were trying to tell me, or let me tell me, what I need to hear myself say. What I need to understand, to feel. To grow from.
If you stuck it out until the end, thank you so much - I feel less crazy and less alone!
Feel free to add your own interpretations from what I've left above; I'm always open to new ideas, different insights, and growth and learning from others!
Take care, of you, others, and our universe xx
