Discover Top Posts Tagged with #overwhelemed

"How pathetic am I?" Speaking shakily into the phone.

"What do you mean?" He responds as I hear him repositioning himself and shuffling some things around.

"Just. . .I went into a bookstore after months of not going to one. . ."

"Oh cool! I know you've been really wanting to go. Was honestly going to take--"

Taking in deep gulps of air, I hear him slowly stop, "Hey, what's wrong?"

"I. . .I didn't buy anything."

"What do you mean? I sent you some money to help you be carefree with--"

"I know but I couldn't do it!" Leaning into the headrest my car seat.

Taking a deep breath, he lowers his voice as concern seeps in, "Why not? Did something happen because I will be--"

"You need the money to help get new glasses and I know you have been--"

"Hey, easy." Struggling with talking I concentrate on him moving around before he continues in a calming tone. "Just breath. Was there a big crowd?"

Nodding I sigh, "Yes, it's the holidays so it was packed, I mean not like fully packed but packed."

"What else?"

"Just. . .moneys been tight, and I can't buy new clothes and the jeans I currently have on make me feel like I am a sardine in a can. . ." Reaching down I unbutton my jeans sighing with a little bit of relief. Trying to ignore the feelings of guilt that I have gained some weight.

"I bet they still look amazing on you and really hug your a--"

"I knew you would say that! Just that's not the point! The--"

"I know what the point is. You just need some new clothes; we can plan a trip together to do just that." He stated while chuckling.

"But you--"

"Listen, I didn't send you that money to make you feel guilty or to "test" you or anything else your brain is trying to formulate. I know you've been getting into reading and reviewing, and I wanted to help you out. Physical copies being your favorite form to read and everything."

Smiling I glance back at the bookstore still lit with people happily browsing and laughing with one another. Picking up books and gasping at the beautiful covers.

"I'm supposed to be this bigshot and yet I can't even go into a bookstore without feeling overwhelmed." Griping my phone, I look back down at the hood of my car.

"I should have come with you."

"You had to attend your conference and I wanted to get a Christmas present for myself. I honestly didn't even expect to be here. With the constant bills and expenses that kept popping up."

Hearing his smile as he spoke drew the corners of my mouth up. "I know, and that's why I wanted to do this for you. I should've known it would have been better if I had gone with you."

"I miss going into bookstores with my dad but. . ." Letting my shoulders drop I studied the chipped, artificial leather on the steering wheel. "He wouldn't approve of what I read and so we wouldn't really vibe as well as we used to. And since I'm not making money yet from reviewing, he doesn't care."

"That's a bullshit way of looking at things. This makes you happy and the way you light up as you talk to me about books? Priceless and if I could, I would buy you that whole damn store!"

Laughing I shake my head, "I know you would but please no nonfiction I live that every day. . ."

"It's a deal! Look I'm going to get glasses, okay? Mom's sending me cash because she wants me to graduate with honors and all that. I guess to get those certificates I need to actually see what I'm doing."

"You could go blind in the middle of your finals and still pass with marks higher than anyone else!"

"Aw, I'm glad you have such confidence in me. Did the bookstore have any of the books you wanted?" Asking as I heard him grabbing a glass of something.

"No. . .I mean they did but they didn't. Just I'm overwhelmed. . .I have so many books and reads I said I would get done before the end of the year and yet I'm at a bookstore. How can I justify buying new books when I can't even go home and instantly read them?"

Swallowing he chuckled, "You can buy books. You don't have to justify anything. You're simply knocking out some of your TBR list and having the physical copies. Even if you don't get to them until two months from now, they're still yours. They helped to bring that beautiful smile to your face."

Feeling my checks warm I squeezed the phone, "I want to come back here with you."

"When I get back in town we will. Buy the books you really want online, hell I will send you extra money so you can get the hardbacks."

"No, you won't!"

"Buy the books you want and then we will plan to eat at a fancy restaurant and go to the bookstore. And I will not allow you to leave without buying at least one book." Continuing his train of thought with a smirk on his face I could hear from the other side of the phone.

"You're encourageable." I mutter as I start the car.

"Only with you."

If you use or continue with these two, please tag me! Would love to read!

I get overwhelmed

so easily

my anxiety creeps inside of me.

Makes it hard to breathe

feels like I’m somebody else

I get overwhelmed

#a rants #song lyrics #overwhelemed #by royal and the serpents

Are you ok today?

Tired

But I’m always tired so that’s not new. Feeling a little overwhelmed. But I don’t know why this time. Usually there’s a source and a can kick it and go ‘hahaha I found you now I can sort this out’. Today that ain’t happening.

Thanks for asking! It’s very sweet of you! ☺️😊

#ask #answer #me #tired #overwhelemed #idk #it just be like that sometimes #will be posting some art later tho

*trigger warning*

I think I’m gonna kill myself, like I actually don’t think I can do this anymore

#dead inside #lost #overwhelemed #heartbreak #dead #i lost my mind #get out of my head #all alone #i don’t want to live anymore #deppresing quotes

Every now and again, I feel the insistent need to shut down. It's not always because of bad, trying, or difficult times. Sometimes it's just because life has become too much, too quick, too busy, all at once and I don't want to move anymore.

I'm always going. One place to another, and another, and another. It's not all bad. The quickness of life keeps me on my toes and directs me from one beautiful moment to the next. But sometimes, life just feels like its flying by so fast that even sleep feels like too much work; just another task. I get exhausted, but when sleep becomes another chore, when can you find rest?

So, I try to shut down. Stop thinking, stop moving, stop everything and just process. Unfortunately, I've only found one thing in this world that allows me to completely shut down, and he is far from me right now. So, I'll do my best on my own, and hope to find some rest another way.