Sylvain: Stop accusing me of hedonism and moral decadence. Sylvain: I am not even having a good time.

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Sylvain: Stop accusing me of hedonism and moral decadence. Sylvain: I am not even having a good time.
Manuela: This is terrible! Why did you even invite me? Jeritza: We didn't. You invited yourself. Hanneman: No one wants you here.
Requested by anonymous.
Hubert: I am going to kill whoever did this. I'm going to kill them for you. Hubert: Don't worry, babies. I'm going to murder every single contemptible degenerate that ever got a mouthful of you. Hubert: They'll die screaming. Ferdinand: Oh! Okay. You're talking to the plants. Okay.
Original post by @bro-im-tired with minor edits.
Sylvain: I figured out why you're depressed. Sylvain: You have updog. Dimitri: What's updog? Sylvain: Felix! Get in here, I told you I could do it- Dimitri: What is updog?! IS IT SERIOUS?!
Original post by @bro-im-tired with minor edits.
Sylvain: How do I ask a boy out? Felix: Simple. You open the door, and say: Felix: Get out, you're bothering me.
Original post by @bro-im-tired with minor edits.
Linhardt: Your grin was at least an 8.3 on the international scale of creepy. Hubert: Got to be ready in case I'm ever happy again. Linhardt: ... 9.4.
Original post by @bro-im-tired with minor edits.
Byleth: The odds of this happening by coincidence are vanishingly small. Linhardt: I would say infinitesimally. Claude: And I'd say teenily-weenily. We all know words.
Ingrid: Ugh, idiots. Ingrid: Oh shit, it's my idiots!