Happy Holidayz!! Ur SkyxReader Cupcakke remix edition fic was sooooooo good I ate that shit up 💕💕💕 now do LegendxReaderxRavio threesome with Legend n Reader as the bottoms (only if you want to 😳😳😳)
LORD HAVE MERCY I WROTE THIS IN AN HOUR
('Cupcakke remix edition fic' had me bawling with laughter LMAO)
Also slightly for @hornyonmainfics b/c I saw that you were thirsting for a Leg/Rav x reader fic..
Out Of Touch
Pairing: Legend x Reader x Ravio
Warning(s): You know what this is. No smut in this chapter, but this is an 18+ story, so please DNI if you're a minor!
Notes: Also inspired by "How Do I Make You Love Me" by The Weeknd.
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"You've got to be kidding me," you deadpanned, staring at Ravio in his little green-apple eyes like he had personally wronged you, arms crossed over your chest as if to protect it from beating straight through your ribcage.
"Whatever do you mean, darling?" the Merchant flashed a smile that was all teeth. Oh, he made you mad. Ring-laden hands landed carefully in the middle of the large counter as he leaned forward to meet your disapproving gaze.
You pinched your temples, gesturing to the thick bundle of arrows like it would fortify your argument. "Goddamn it, Rav, these arrows were five rupees yesterday and you know it!"
You watched incredulously when he eyed the bundle, then returned to grinning you like the bastard he was. You couldn't believe him and Link were counterparts. "Were they?"
"Yes! And here I thought those ears would make it easier for you to hear," you hissed, pointing an accusing finger at that accursed rabbit hood of his, who he had most graciously shed when you stomped to the register nary five minutes ago. "Come on, dude. You can't be serious."
His eyes flashed wickedly and you knew you had made a terrible mistake. "Yeah, because I'm Ravio—"
You abruptly turned on your heel, only slid to a stop when a hand caught your wrist. It was the bunny bitch himself, practically bent over the counter in an attempt to keep stop you from marching out and finding another vendor.
"Hey! You can't just leave!"
You scoffed, pivoting slightly to face him once more, brow arched as you stared him down. "Why? This is a business, I'm not obligated to buy anything."
Ravio had the audacity to look affronted by the very insinuation that you would leave without spending your hard-earned rupees on his bullshit scams. "No, but you'd deny business to your ever-faithful roommate?"
"Um, Link is my roommate," but Link was also gone, having disappeared to do... whatever he did when he wasn't sulking around at home. You paused to think of an appropriate burn. "You're like the homeless guy who's taken residence in our rafters."
The Merchant gasped in faux offense, retracting his hand to slap it over his heart in what you could only assume was a wordless declaration of moral injury. "Rude! I steal nothing and contribute to rent."
You rolled your eyes. "Yeah, and I'm the Queen of Hyrule—"
"Not with that attitude, you aren't."
"...Fuck you, Rav."
Instead of firing some equally clever rebuttal your way, Ravio actually seemed to consider the prospect, all the while you blinked and wondered if now was a good time to start running. "I'd expect dinner first, as is proper" he eventually decided on, nodding slowly like it was a respectable response.
Your jaw nearly hit the floor; in no way, shape, or form was this a respectable response. "Um."
"And, of course, it would have to be when Mr. Hero is away, unless you're into that?"
Your cheeks flushed against your will. What... what was happening? Despite appearances, you'd known Ravio for years—which was probably why he was allowed to refer to you as a 'whore' when the two of you were tipsy and engrossed in a card game and you were allowed to screech about his outrageous prices in return—but never once had your roommate-esque relationship crossed over to... whatever this was.
And yet, here you were, being propositioned by the fucking Merchant.
Heart threatening to hammer from your chest, you turned, grabbed the bundle of arrows, and slung your entire pouch of rupees onto the counter.
"Keep the change."
You were gone before he could finish calling your name.
It was nearly nightfall by the time Ravio managed to drag his sorry butt home, slinking inside with unusual regard for your peace and quiet. Usually, he would fling the door open with some innocuous exclamation about the state of the Hyrulean weaponry market, but, this time, only a small creak could be heard, followed by the soft shuffling of boots.
"Hey, Rav," you called, back facing the door as you busied over the cooking pot, half-heartedly stirring the soup within. The three of you had learned early on that it was easier for everyone if you did the cooking, seeing as the other two were largely useless in the kitchen. "Did you make any sales?"
There was a pause. Then, he spoke: "Just yours. I closed up shop early."
Your head twisted around so fast you swore your neck cracked from the force of the action. Never in your life had you thought you'd hear Ravio, scammer of thousands, admit to willingly skip out on profits. Monsters had begun to emerge along the surrounding roads—which was likely why Link had traipsed into the wilderness a few days prior with only some bread, his sword, and a lingering gaze over his shoulder as you waved from the doorway—which meant business should be booming. "What?! Why?"
Now that he had your attention fixed on him, Ravio leaned against the wall beside the door, one hand combing through his soft black hair while the other braced across his stomach, like he was a swooning maiden rather than a self-proclaimed "Legendary" merchant. "And so the interrogation begins! If you must know, it's because someone bought my entire stock of arrows, leaving me high and—"
You eyed the bundle of arrows on the table, brain working furiously to decipher if he was lying or not. There was no way that Ravio, a god among merchants, hadn't seen fit to stock on arrows, one of the most popular weapons, in anticipation for what had colloquially become known as 'monster season' among the townspeople.
...Or was there?
"—dry! For shame, I tell you!"
Yeah, and then he'd propositioned you for sex, but you supposed it wasn't polite to mention when you had all but run out on him. Oops.
"That's so crazy," you said dryly, praying to whatever deity existed that it masked the budding nervousness in your tone. The soup burbled, and you turned to stir in some salt, still speaking: "Who would do that? That's just plain wrong. I'm appalled."
"So am I, darling," you heard the soft shuffle of footsteps, then the dull creaking of a familiar chair as he took his usual seat at the table, spinning around to lean his elbows back on the thick wood. You didn't need to see his smirk when you could practically hear it. "But, it would be wrong to say I'm not somewhat impressed.
You gave the soup a harsher-than-normal stir. "In what, your customer's ability to adapt to a changing business environment or yours to exploit them?"
There was a groan. "That's twice you've wounded me," he whined, to which you rolled your eyes and debated telling him to be a man. "And in a single day? For shame!"
"Sounds to me like you're ashamed of a lot of things," you sniped without any real heat, grabbing the pair of bowls you'd placed by the hearth and filling them with a hearty helping of mushroom-and-meat goodness. Ravio watched with rapt attention as you brought them to the table, placing one in front of him before taking a seat at the opposite side of the table. "You better eat up before Link comes home," you gestured to the half-full pot with a deadpan expression. "Because that won't stand a chance when he does, and I'd rather avoid trashing this place. Again."
"As you wish," he lifted the bowl to his lips and took a hearty sip. Your ears perked in realization, and you quickly snagged a spoon from the pocket of your borrowed apron, sliding it across the table to him with a muffled 'sorry'. He took the offering without hesitation, scooping a hearty portion of meat and mushroom, and you were grateful that someone in this house actually ate their fungi. Link had the nasty habit of glaring down anything vegetable on his plate like he was trying to absorb the nutrients through the power of his gaze alone. "And here I thought Mr. Hero was your favorite."
"I wouldn't worry, you can be just as much a pain in the ass, too," you assured him blandly; eyebrow raised, spoon filled to the brim.
He snapped his fingers. "And that's three!"
"Shut up and eat, Rav."
It was freezing.
A gust of wind rattled the house as you attempted to yank your thin blanket higher without exposing your feet to the abhorrent chill. You typically never bothered with repairs because Link was unusually obsessive in fixing any issues as soon as they arose, but with him gone... well, you weren't quite sure where the offending hole was, but, by Hylia, things would not be pretty when you discovered it.
You shivered; this sucked, and not in the good way. You yanked the blanket a bit higher, accidentally revealing the barest edge of toe to the air, which brought forth a hissed curse that was far too loud for comfort.
A beat passed. Then, from Link's bed on the opposite side of the room, you heard: "Are you awake?"
Your fingers, stiff and chilled, tightened around the threadbare hem of your blanket. If there was anything that Link and Ravio shared, it was that they were annoyingly persistent. There wasn't a single thought in your mind that he wouldn't bother you until you coughed up some sort of answer. "Yeah."
Another rush of wind battered the poor home, followed by... was that rain? Already? "Why?" Ravio's voice rang loud over the approaching storm.
"Because it's fucking cold," you bit out without much heat. Risking a glance at Link's bed, you found him bright-eyed and sitting upright, back against the thick headboard. It was strange seeing the Merchant without his usual adornments, like his rings or that horribly gaudy belt, but he was still wearing that bunny cloak-tunic-dress thing, so you supposed you couldn't complain that much. A thin laugh passed over your chilled lips, and you took the risk of rolling to your back, propping yourself slightly on your elbows to view him in greater detail. "What's your excuse?"
This was already turning out different than expected. After two years of being Link's roommate, you'd grown used to his quiet, somewhat brash demeanor, though it was hardly so when you had the vivid memories of joining him in bed when times got tough or nightmares tougher; arms snug around your back and a warm, silent face pressed to the indent of your collarbone, though he would kill you if did you anything more than acknowledge and move on. With Ravio, things were... uncertain. Not unwelcome, simply unknown.
"I don't like storms," he decided after a few beats, hands buried beneath Link's bedspread. His hair was as perfect as ever, nearly invisible in the darkness, but you would recognize its shine anywhere.
"It wasn't storming before," you said, not unkindly. The cold bit at your neck over the hem of your tunic-dress,
"No, it wasn't," he parroted, and the room fell silent once more. Until a crack of thunder rumbled outside and you both jumped, looked at each other, and burst into raucous laughter a second later.
"Hylia, I can't believe—!" you chortled, momentarily forgetting your grievances at the sheer absurdity of the situation. From across the room, Ravio shook from the force of his own chuckles as they bubbled up to join yours. He looked carefree, and you...
Well, you laughed a bit harder, knowing you weren't alone in the unexpected mirth. Clapping a hand over your mouth only did so much, and it wasn't until you heard the thick rustle of sheets did you finally give pause. It was the Merchant, of course, but he was... getting out of bed? Willingly??
Apparently, the storm could wait; you were far more interested in whatever fuckery he planned on doing, anyway. You watched with rapt attention as he walked across the room, expression twisting in the barest grimace when the cold floor met his bare feet.
"What are you doing?"
Your voice sounded booming in the budding silence.
Ravio didn't answer. He grabbed his scarf from where it was folded on the table, and ambled to your bedside. "Here," he said, offering the thick, black-and-blue fabric to you. "It's not much, but it should do the trick."
"Um," you blinked owlishly. "It's fine, you don't have to give me your stuff."
It was with much surprise that you watched his face harden into something akin to a disappointed scowl, like something a parent might give their misbehaving child. What the fuck was happening? "Of course I don't have, I want to."
Fuck, why did he always have to make such stunningly good points when you were least expecting it? Despite this, you bit your tongue, and your lip, accepting the scarf with about as much enthusiasm as a sleepy kitten. "Thanks, Rav."
The Merchant's smile shone brighter than the terrible, brilliant sun. "Keep the change," he said in a tone that couldn't have been anything but fond and you... well, you just watched as he began to shuffle back to Link's bed.
There was nothing between you and Ravi, or you and Link, or any such combination that involved you and the barest idea of romance. It was preposterous, and horribly disrespectful to your beloved roommates.
...So why did you want to reach out and stop him?
"Hey, Rav," at the sound of your voice, he paused, halfway between both beds. Anything could happen when a middle was involved, and you both knew how much he hated extremes.
The storm howled outside.
"Hm?"
You tried to stave off the spike of disappointment that rose at the loss of the term "darling", but some feelings had an annoying habit of simply bouncing back stronger. Hylia, you really were out of touch, weren't you?
The window rattled. You could have sworn someone was outside.
It would be so easy to tell him, so easy to cajole a warn body into the sheets beside you. You'd slept with Link countless times, cuddled in his embrace until the kiss of morning, when he'd slip out and carry you to your bed, gingerly tucking in while you feigned sleep. And if he pressed a pat to your head or brushed some hair from your face, who were you to judge. Link was a hero. Ravio was a merchant. All you wanted was to—
"Have a good night."
Candy-green eyes shone in the low moonlight. Ravio tipped his head just as you let yours fall on the pillow, the folded square of his scarf clenched tightly between trembling, frozen fingers.
"You too, darling," said the Merchant, and, without another word he retreated.
Stay here, your mind whispered. Bring me back to reality.
This was supposed to be one chapter, but my brain kind of got away from me so enjoy!!!
