I js came across a post of someone ragging on nonsharing selfshippers, and I have something that I’ve always thought about that I think I should say.
I genuinely believe that people who rag on nonsharing selfshippers have some kind of ableist undertone. They are always like, “They’re delusional! They are way too obsessed with their f/o(s)! Why do they think they OWN a fictional character?”
First of all, we are not delusional.. that is probably one of the most ableist things you can say to someone especially if they ACTUALLY have delusions. Selfshipping can vary in many different levels, and it is so stupid how you can find a sharing selfshipper who is just as dedicated to their f/o(s) as a nonsharing selfshipper, and people would choose to call the nonsharing selfshipper delusional.
Not to mention, have any of you considered that the reason they’re so obsessed with their f/o(s) is because they are coping with something or have a hyperfixation on said character? Like, have Yall not heard of that specific character helping with their mental health..? And that maybe that character is the only thing they have that makes them happy….?? Or that the selfshipper is neurodivergent and just have very big hyperfixations on the character…….?????
And truly, we do NOT believe that we “own” our f/os. I gen don’t know where y’all got that from. “Your f/o would think you’re toxic with how possessive you are!” Or maybe.. my f/o wouldn’t want randos flirting with them either. Maybe my f/o is also jealous and doesn’t want me with anyone else either. Or MAYBE you should just get outta my business..?
Basically, I believe that nonsharing selfshipper haters are ableist because they just use ableist insults and can’t seem to take it into consideration that people with mental health problems use such things to cope and just don’t like to see their f/o with other people. It can put them in a horrible place mentally, and for some reason people just lack compassion in such areas. As a nonsharing selfshipper, I was once in a place surrounded by doubles and people who shipped my f/os with other characters and it was genuinely so triggering to me that I was put into a horrible mental space and hurt a bunch of people and myself.
This is not an excuse for my behavior, but it is definitely a reason for people to set boundaries and other people to stay out of our business. You don’t know what someone could be going through, and even if they are being an ass, do NOT use it as an excuse to rag on their attachment to their f/os. That loops every nonsharing selfshipper into this toxic rhetoric and gives people the impression that they can be ableist simply because of our mental problems, coping mechanisms, and hobbies. If there is a nonsharing selfshipper who HAPPENS to be a wiener, please just block and move on, do not go around telling everyone how horrible nonsharers are just because of some bad apples.
TLDR; I believe that nonsharing selfshipper haters are ableist because of their petty reasons, because they dealt with SOME bad apples, and because they can’t mind their own business.
