Why I Need to Achieve Sobriety?
I’ve confessed a couple of times on here that I consume alcohol quite a bit. There’s even a blog post where I talk about my alcoholism—why I reach for the bottle, and how people reveal their true selves under the influence. However, as of today, I’m four days sober. I haven’t touched the bottle at all. For some, that might not seem like much, but for people who rely on substances, even 24 hours can be grueling because of withdrawal symptoms. I’m still experiencing them today, on the fourth day.
This isn’t the first time I’ve tried to achieve sobriety. Last year, I managed to go 104 days sober before I jumped off the wagon. I can’t even say I fell off—I chose to jump off. Since then, my drinking habits have gotten worse. How? I got into more cocktail mixing. It benefits how I make drinks for others, but the reason I’m trying to achieve sobriety again is because of my health conditions. Not caused by booze, but by the autoimmune disease I’ve been managing since my early 20s. Alcohol has more adverse effects on me than on someone without an autoimmune condition.
Since mine involves the thyroid, I need to be mindful of my drinking habits. I’ve listened to fitness influencers mention my condition while being totally unaware of what they’re talking about. Metabolism is just a sliver of what the thyroid does. The real function is hormone regulation throughout the body—and hormones do almost everything people don’t realize is important. Without thyroid hormones, the movement and absorption of essential vitamins like B12 and minerals are disrupted. Even if you eat well, your body may not absorb anything, leading to deficiencies. That’s why heart palpitations, fatigue, brain fog, mood swings, depression, anxiety, lack of rest, and slower recovery occur. Untreated, it can be fatal. Nails become brittle, hair thins, skin issues arise, swelling increases, and inflammation builds up.
Autoimmune disease is basically the body attacking itself. I’ve talked about this before. Alcohol disrupts my medication and prevents B12 transfer, making it harder for my body to function properly. So, if I want to lean out or build muscle again, I have to control my drinking. When I don’t, my body doesn’t recover. I’ve injured myself many times because my body couldn’t heal from labor-intensive jobs and weightlifting. Poor sleep makes everything worse. When I was at my best physically, it was during my longest period of sobriety.
I always tell people my daily habits and diet are tailored to me alone. My goal is to manage how I feel day to day—better sleep, less fatigue, more calm, less stress, and more enjoyment in my activities. I’ve always been active, regardless of body mass. Even at my largest, I could run three miles and lift heavy daily. My job required lifting and moving around 50 pounds for eight-hour shifts, five days a week, often with overtime. Then I’d go home and run three miles to de-stress. I also attended school and walked around campus, often without eating enough to sustain my activity level.
Many people work sedentary jobs, but that’s never been me. I can’t relate to health issues caused by sitting all day. My job, however, did wear down my lungs and joints. I have inflammation in most major joints. Both knees were messed up, but I’m glad I no longer need knee braces or compression sleeves. I can squat and move fluidly again. I’m also relieved my elbows and rotator cuff no longer hurt—rotator cuff tendinitis is agony. I chalk up my active lifestyle to my neurodivergence; I can’t sit still for long. But to stay on topic, I’m pursuing sobriety again because the health impacts are too much now that I’m older.
I couldn’t care less about body or weight standards, or the obsession in the U.S. with protein intake—it’s propaganda, regardless of what people think. Sure, consuming more protein helps you lean up, but not for the reasons people believe. Calories are always involved. When you overconsume protein, your body converts it into glucose, which requires more energy (calories) to process than carbohydrates. That’s why eating more protein naturally creates a calorie deficit, eventually tapping into fat stores for energy. I generally lean up more easily in winter—staying warm requires calories. I just don’t like hot weather, so I take any chance to jab at summer.
Back to nutrients: people often overlook other macronutrients like fiber and micronutrients. Regions that eat more plant-based diets tend to have fewer deficiencies and better longevity. Lentils are my favorite legume for fiber and protein. Many foods combine both if you pay attention to macronutrients. I enjoy meat, but overconsuming animal-based foods affects me negatively. You can’t get all essential minerals and vitamins from animals, and I need more of certain nutrients because of my autoimmune condition. Plant foods help reduce my chronic inflammation. Yes, organ meats have nutrients, but red meat increases cholesterol and cardiovascular risks. My best self wasn’t just sober—it was when I ate a mostly plant-based diet with minimal red meat. I prefer fatty fish like salmon, eel, and raw tuna because I love sashimi. I rarely eat chicken unless with friends. I eat eggs, but mostly in garden omelets loaded with bell peppers, onions, and spinach. Spinach is incredibly filling. I love miso—it’s an excellent probiotic food.
I love food. It took time to rebuild a healthy relationship with it because I enjoy cooking and trying different cuisines. When you worry about how society perceives you, it destroys the joy of living. But I’m four days sober, and hopefully, I can continue this path to feel better and manage my conditions more effectively.
