Well anyway...I wrapped myself in corporate decorative for years while burying the artistic side of myself. Felt accomplished at first, but the more accomplished I became the more of a target I became to people's insecurities. Corporate America is like a mental asylum. For value sake, a game not worth the effort.
With that said, what are your favorite hobbies? Solely done just because they remind you, that you're "you".
Oh and before I go, these computers and cell phones and games are fun but for humanities sake GO TOUCH SOME GRASS, REGULARLY.
No writing tonight. I did yard work after work today! I am accomplished and sore. I finally trimmed the overgrown Azalea (by hand), which I have never done before — and it came out okay! I can see out my window again! I also planted the yellow rose bush and violas and my mum brought us. (Hopefully they will stay alive.) 💛🏵️
The internet is such a weird place because you'll se people problematizing the most insignificant thing ever and transforming it into the topic of the month at the same time they reduce actually important topics into something irrelevant.
TLDR: I’m okay now, taking breaks does wonders, I still like IDV (despite all its flaws and the current situation) and probably will return to play it, I will return to writing up news/articles again, the IDV creative team needs sympathy (NetEase doesn’t ofc but my negative feelings towards them have cooled…for now),I love you all but sometimes I do REALLY REALLY REALLY need a break from social media in general.)
Even the TLDR is kinda long lol
Not sure if I should even really make this post since I actually am unsure if people care but I realized I never made a post saying I’m okay now after my previous vent on feeling overwhelmed and tense and whatnot. Sure, I made my Tomodachi Life post saying that but I feel like dedicating a post on this with additional thoughts would be good too.
First and foremost, I do feel much better. I took a break from writing IDV news/articles and took time to rest and explore other hobbies. I do plan to ease myself back into it this week though. Fingers crossed I can write another character study/analysis and the voice actor post (maybe).
I realized when taking a break that it really did feel nice to remove myself from socials as well. Whether that be here or Twitter. The situation with The Time Raiders debacle where many thought NetEase used GenAI again got to me greatly. Though I wanted to wait on their response before really judging the situation, the body and heart that I have simply can be too…emotional for that.
Anyways, their response was adequate enough but the response from the community and the possibility of them using AI again after making positive progress was…enough to wash over me like a wave. I’m like a rag, I suck it all up like…I guess, an empath, and it just builds up and up and up inside me. A rag can only hold so much, y’know? (What an analogy I’m doing here).
So not going to lie, stepping away from all those voices and being with just me, myself, and I felt calming. I understand why people responded the way they did, of course! Everyone is valid in their feelings. Just wanted to add that. Additionally, I did write up about the whole situation and their response on my website (I posted it on my news Tumblr but idk if anyone saw…)
But speaking of that situation, it also really just hit me that this whole AI situation with IDV doesn’t even upset me anymore. I just feel sad for the creative/art team mainly. Sure, you can be upset, angry, disgusted with NetEase for their negligence over the Time Raiders situation in which they now have to redraw one of the fits because it basically ripped off a cosplayer and then they made mistakes in the posters that were mistaken for AI. (They are definitely accountable but the Time Raider’s copyright holders were also sloppy as well.)
But being blinded by these negative emotions isn’t good and having calmed a bit and waited for their response made me think 1. Patience is key and 2. How terribly overworked the creative team is. Heck, right after the Time Raiders situation was resolved…
ANOTHER situation over the use of an artist’s painting in the upcoming new game mode had to be resolved. Apparently it was only supposed to be a placeholder before being replaced but they hadn’t done it before the new game mode went live on test servers (why they used an actual artist painting tho as a placeholder is definitely a valid question tho. Tbf I was already trying to take a break so I didn’t look into this one further. Just know that it got resolved quickly).
I’m not even upset anymore. More curious and confused on the “why” though I already answered that question. I’m new to the community and have no idea if they were this…sloppy (?) careless (?) before?Certainly there was no instance of GenAI which at this point really seems to have been used BECAUSE of the higher ups wanting to push an even heavier workload on the artists and felt like the demand for new content outweighed the costs/quality of leaving it up to human hands. If quantity over quality and the stress of meeting deadlines wasn’t so pressured on the team, I don’t believe AI would’ve been used otherwise.
Heck, even in the Time Raiders statement, on the subject of the “AI” posters, they were all like “Good news! There was no trace of GenAi used” Like…if that isn’t another acknowledgement of the situation then I don’t know what. Which means, they know. They are aware of the community’s abject hatred for it. Hence why it seemed even more puzzling they’d even use it again so soon (especially after what was said in the livestream).
Anyways, this is turning out longer than I thought it would be. I was just watching Dead by Daylight’s 10th anniversary livestream and couldn’t help but wonder where things would stand when IDV gets to its 10th anniversary in a couple years (that also tells you how I felt about DBD’s livestream. I mean, some good stuff—liked the Silent Hill/Scooby Doo stuff but yeah…) Realized then it would be nice to dump this post on here.
But I just want to finish off by saying that while I’m still not currently playing IDV, I’ve been toying with the idea of playing it again. Probably will. When that will be is truly the question though perhaps by next month.
I loved creating content and streaming it as well but streaming it is another matter entirely. I’m a stupidly small streamer and while I haven’t minded turning to Overwatch or Tomodachi Life (or even Genshin), it tends not to bring people in…or any at all (again, small small streamer) and it really sucks plain and simple.
Always liked the thought of being a content creator and it’s just my luck it was small, niche IDV that I put out regular content (LOL I hate myself). I can’t even go part-time with that. There’s only like ONE IDV streamer who gets over 70+ viewers. Anyways, sorry I don’t think Tumblr ppl care for Twitch, but will say that while the community is small, I didn’t mind that and had accepted my fate lol
Lastly, to those still waiting or boycotting IDV, I hope you also take the time to take a breath and evaluate the situation with your own eyes, listening to your own voice because there probably isn’t going to be some grand statement on the issue (though I believe most of us know that already but others like those on Twitter/YouTube/Twitch) haven’t gotten the memo). It’ll probably be different from mine but I realized that listening to others and soaking up all the sentiments not of my own, was partially the cause of discordance within me.
There’s a lot of questions this game also made me ask that also was a point of personal contention within me. Still sorting out that, but I’m making my peace with it and telling myself that I will do what I want to in order to ease that even if it’s selfish and not necessarily the morally correct choice or the one everyone else is following.
Thank you to those who expressed their concern and care for me as well. I really appreciate it! I know I didn’t really respond with words of gratitude (outside of liking your comments I guess lol) but it meant a lot.
I still probably will ease myself back on here though meaning I will be here but may not be as responsive. While Tumblr is leagues better, I forget it’s a form of social media as much as the rest and can be its own bubble, so I need to pace myself on here, too. I even have notifications off for the time being as I sort out things.
But anyways, take care, guys and have a good start to the week~! And if you read all this thank you so much!
(Now that I think about it, this almost reads like a goodbye letter lol. But I’m obviously staying through thick and thin.)
