#trigger talk

[dizzyuprobin]

Uurrghhghhmmmm.

So. Trigger talk re: stalking for those not up for it.

I have this one 'traditional' trigger. (I do have other triggers but it's mostly random shit? But we're talking about stuff traditionally tagged for) And it's frustrating, because I want to write and explore it/it's effects on people, but I have to do so *so freakin' carefully* because it can get me fucked up.

In this case I want to write on the experience of having been stalked. Now, I was not the person stalked, but one of my family members when I was a kid *was* and had to stay with us for half a year, half a country away from her home with her baby, while the cops fucking did nothing and her life was being actively threatened.

It actually became a fairly famous case for it's time and a true crime documentary was made about it. Ha. Ha ha.

Anyway, being a kid and seeing that terror up close and personal, and hearing about the very graphic death threats made against a family member, fucked me up a bit. I won't repeat any of the lines here because fuck that, but shit involved dismemberment. It was fucking dark.

Didn't help that years later one of my ex-friends cyber stalked me for over two years as well which yay re-traumatized me! *jazz hands*. Like one example- the first and only time I said 'peep' online *vaguely* about our fallout (basically a 'wow I'm doing so much better since person left!' with no names), on an account I had created after we fell out, over a *year* after that happened... within 4 hours I got brigaded and spammed and the art competition I was in was threatened about me.

I had to block them and the friends they convinced I was the devil for years. They kept following me with random fucking accounts. Honestly, if I block you and you're like 'wtf', I am sorry it is entirely possible your name just included one of the words I knew they would use in their usernames and I still just knee-jerk block that.

Oh- btw I got to stay in the art competition it was fine, my painting got 4th place, but fucking hell. Mostly the people running it were like 'holy shit that was crazy, I'm so sorry you're having to deal with that'.

And that second situation probably wouldn't have fucked me up as much without the first formative years bit, but it is what it is.

So. And unlike my only other kinda traditional trigger, aka religious trauma, that I can engage with on a LOT of different levels and still be fine, only with a subset of things in there I need to be careful on... whereas even the vaguest talk of stalking fucks me the fuck up.

But I want to explore it, even if it's just a little bit. I want to highlight even if you're functional, the kind of low-key constant vigilance it causes. Like fuck, even typing the above vague shit about the friend fallout has me paranoid and is the most I've said on a public channel in *five fucking years*. It's been half a decade and I still get tense.

I want to write about how maddening it is to deal with a ridiculous level of paranoia, but also it was because you needed to have it.

And maybe it's because I have a character now I can reasonably explore it with in a... not light hearted way, but in a way that is not threatening because it deals with the lasting effect, vs the event. Because I can relate to Mecha Man flinching. To him instantly doing a sweep of the room when Royd says his identity at a whisper. Because he was a famous solo super, and whether it was villains or fans you know he had to deal with some bullshit.

And not woobifying shit. You deal with it. You get practical. It becomes second nature to do sweeps and lock downs of accounts, to set up an alarm system, etc. Because even after the issue is solved and the person who caused the fear is gone, you still work around it. That's the part I want to explore, how how you operate as a person changes.

Anyway.

Thank you for listening to my rant about this trigger and my experiences if you've stayed this long.

[cryptidscene]

Chronic Pain and PTSD Nightmares.

[queerness-lover]

Trigger based terms ~

Demi-trigger or Demi-trig: a term for individuals who have a trigger that grows bigger the more confronted to it (ex: a demi-trig individual slightly trigger by skulls, the more they will see/be confronted by skulls, their trigger will grow stronger and bigger)

Triggerflux or Trig-flux: a term for individuals who have a trigger that fluctuate in intensity (ex: a trig-flux individual can be 100% triggered by one content one day and the other day 40% triggered by it)

The X-trigg flags will show the opposite of their triggers so people won’t be triggered by their own flags.

Drawingtrigg: a term for individuals who are triggered via drawings.

Emojitrigg: a term for individuals who are triggered via emojis.

Picturetrigg: a term for individuals who are triggered via pictures.

Animtrigg: a term for individuals who are triggered by animals, they may or may not be triggered by all of them. (Flag 1/one)

Brightcoltrigg: a term for individuals who are triggered by bright colors. (Flag 2/two)

Capstrigg: a term for individuals who are triggered by capitals letters, they may or may not be triggered by all of their forms. (Flag 3/three)

Liquitrigg: a term for individuals who are triggered by liquids, they may or may not be triggered by all of their forms. (Flag 4/four)

Skonestrigg: a term for individuals who are triggered by skulls and/or bones, they may or may not be triggered by all of their forms. (Flag 5/five)

Weatrigg: a term for individuals who are triggered by weapons, they may or may not be triggered by all of them. (Flag 6/six)

[incorrect-otgw-quotes]

there was a time in my life where i went through a traumatic event that was very closely connected to food, and for a period following that incident, looking at pictures of food was very triggering and could cause panic attacks. to the anon in the last ask: you never know the circumstances that cause someone to need a trigger tagged, and tagging a trigger has nothing to do with labelling the thing as "bad." thank you, op, for continuing to tag triggers so people like me feel safe and happy while browsing tumblr.

Okay now I'm really happy that I answered that ask! Thank you so much for saying this because I'm really glad that what I said mattered and this really validates the use of tags.

[e-the-village-cryptid]

Hi um, I’m not sure if this question even makes any sense but uh: Okay, for example, suppose I see a really helpful post for recognizing/avoiding a specific type of danger. I wanna reblog it so more people can see it and stay safe, because sadly it’s a very common type of danger. However, it could be potentially triggering for one of my friends who follows my blog (I already know him from elsewhere and we’re pretty good buds). Should I still reblog it and hope he has the tw indicator tags blocked off already? He’s pretty new to tumblr so what if he doesn’t know how to do it yet? I’m just really scared of Doing A Bad with this I guess. (Yeah this might just be my anxiety talking but a second opinion would be nice :3)

Hello, anon! Since you’re pretty good friends, I would just ask him if he knows how to block trigger tags! (Also blocking post content is a good idea too, in case people don’t properly tag the trigger.) Then he can get that set up for the future, you can tag things with a trigger warning, and neither of you will have to worry about it. 

Generally speaking, though, the best thing you can do is tagging triggers that your followers have asked you to tag (and maybe tagging common triggers too, especially if it’s an original post.) You don’t have to avoid reblogging something just because it might trigger someone, because, well, anything can be a trigger to someone, so you’d never post anything! People are responsible for taking reasonable measures to avoid their triggers— if you’re tagging things properly but someone isn’t blocking tags/content for their trigger, that’s on them.

Also one more note: I’ve been told the best way to tag things is as “[thing] tw”. This is because the tumblr blocking system only looks at the first word of the tag for some reason. I’ve never had an issue with tags I filter being blocked, but some other people have so apparently that’s the way to do it!

[chaotic-neutral-toga]

Mocking quote unquote "silly" triggers is such a dick move, it's unreal. "Haha, this person is traumatized and experiences mental torment upon being triggered and they're asking me to respect that, what a loser amirite" like what the actual fuck is wrong with your head

Respect all triggers, or I'm telling Jesus to remove your kneecap privileges. No one should be told that something that mentally and emotionally hurts them is "silly" or "stupid", ever. I don't care if someone asks you to tw tag leaves, you're gonna fucking tag it! It's not that damn hard, just don't be a dickwad! Please!

[adamisalive]

you cant trigger yourself lmao

I can and did. 

I thought I could handle it, turns out I couldn’t. 

Tagging the post along with the image in the post has got me freaking out right now so thanks for validating my feelings. 

[ptsdsafe]

I have a few friends who, though I love them dearly, and I know they care about me, dont seem to understand how certain actions (I.e. touching my sides, sneaking up behind me, generally touching me without permission/me making it clear its ok) are extremely triggering for me, and I'm really not sure how to explain it, because its very difficult to talk about without panicking. do you have any advice?

Well, my first thought goes to writing. Writing a letter or sending a text has always been easier for me than speaking to someone about my issues!

However, if you can’t talk or write about it, try to message them an article or to give them a book talking about triggers, PTSD and how it can make the victim feel. Maybe with the message or book add a note like, ‘In relation to you touching my sides; please don’t ask me about this because I get panicked talking about it’ or something along those lines

You could also have somebody else talk to them for you; maybe your school’s’ counselor (if you’re in school) or a friend who knows about PTSD. That way they can have an active dialogue where they can ask questions without you being in the room.

I hope you find one of these options useful!