#undateables

[so-nightmary-ul]

My Solomon's cards problem

I'm a simple girl. I see Purgatory Hall boys, I love Purgatory Hall boys.

Bonus:

[iameliseposts]

Obey Me Masterlist

You came out of the portal and into the Devildom. You must pick a place with the residents of your choice to reside during your time here:

Centuries ago in this House, a dark unsolved tragedy took place. It gives a chill down your spine as you open it’s gates.

House Of Lamentation

A medieval looking castle stands currently without the king. You waltz in, wondering who was ruling such a place.

Demon Lord Castle

The purest resembling location in this dark realm. You seek salvation and you knock on its door.

Purgatory Hall

Off to the side, you see three new faces. You haven’t met them before, so you walk up to them and take a chance.

The Other Students

[haloshornsinkstains]

Kisses Under the Mistletoe:   (Formerly) Undateables Edition

I’m enjoying these mistletoe kisses headcanons too much, I should have started earlier. I’m trying to get a few more festive pieces written before Christmas, and hopefully some for New Years (intermittent inernet problems permitting). And make this place a bit prettier.

Diavolo

When Diavolo called for you to visit his office you thought you were prepared for just about anything, after all you’d had plenty of experience of his eccentricities and whims at this point.

So when he started grilling you on festive traditions in the human world while you sat beside him at his desk you weren’t exactly surprised, although the breadth of the information he’d gathered to grill you on was a little overwhelming.

You almost felt bad admitting you weren’t particularly familiar with the festival of Saturnalia, partly because of the way Diavolo’s face fell and partly because it sounded wild. 

As you progressed through various traditions you grew more and more comfortable, shedding the usual layer of formality that being in Diavolo’s presence seemed to make you grow, adding your own anecdotes about traditions you followed personally.

He’s writing things down, and you assume, making plans for some kind of festive celebration in the Devildom. It’s all so normal you let your guards down, and as such, get blindsided by his next question.

“What about mistletoe? What is the importance of mistletoe?”

You blink a few times, trying to get the cogs in your brain to function properly. “Oh, um, it’s become tradition to kiss under mistletoe. I think it’s supposed to bring luck…”

Diavolo frowns, retrieving something from his drawer and holding it out to you to inspect. “Then perhaps I should ask Asmodeus why he gifted me this?”

You’re staring at the mistletoe like it’s going to jump out and bite you. (Stranger things have happened in the Devildom, even if this particular plant looks pretty harmless).

“Oh!” Diavolo beams in a way that worries you. “I suppose we should kiss now!”

y/n.exe has stopped working

“I… I can’t! Lucifer would kill me! I mean, you’re the Future King and I’m just… me?”

Diavolo frowns and for a moment you see your life flash before your eyes. If for no other reason than Lucifer is probably going to murder you for upsetting his Lord. 

“But, y/n, I would like to kiss you if you would let me.” He’s still grinning mischievously but his eyes are soft with affection. “You’re special y/n. And if Lucifer shouts we can just tell him it was my idea, he rarely shouts at me.”

Your cheeks are on fire but you nod, letting Diavolo cup your face between two large hands and press his lips to yours. The kiss is warm and gentle, almost chaste. He kisses you like he’s afraid he’ll break you, and to be fair he probably could, but it leaves you heart racing and lips tingling when he pulls away.

Barbatos

It’s only been two days and Barbatos would very much like to find out who exactly told his Lord all about human festive traditions, in particular who gave him a record of ‘festive’ music. He just wants to talk. (Not that he would ever say this to Diavolo, he is an impeccable butler after all).

You had been roped in to coming to the castle to help with the decorations, but as you wandered past the kitchen with a box of tinsel and baubles you heard a tired sigh that sounded awfully familiar.

Popping your head through the door you spot Barbatos frowning at a mixing bowl.

“Everything alright in here?”

Barbatos never jumps at anything, but his eyes do look a fraction wider than usual when he turns to look at you.

“Perhaps you could assist me? Lord Diavolo asked me to make a ‘Christmas Cake’, if you’re familiar I could use your expertise. I’m not as experienced with baking human world delicacies.”

 You grin, stepping inside and settling your box down on an unused counter and heading to his side to help. “There are some things even you don’t know?” You laugh softly, looking down at the mixing bowl. “It’s been a while since I made one, but I can try to help? The secret to my grandma’s recipe was usually a lot of alcohol though, she’d bake it months in advance and keep topping it up...”

The two of you bake together, and if Barbatos notices the pink flush on your cheeks whenever your body bruises against his, or when he wipes flour from your cheek, he is polite enough not to mention it.

You’ve just put the cake in the oven when Barbatos moves over to the forgotten box of decorations, rifling through curiously before pulling something out.

“Y/N, are there supposed to be plants in here?”

You walk over to see what he’s talking about just as Lord Diavolo walks in with a beaming smile.

“Y/N! Here you are! Oh, I know what that is!” He’s gesturing to what you now realise is mistletoe dangling between Barbatos’ gloved fingers. “That’s mistletoe, Asmodoeus and Solomon were telling me all about it. You’re supposed to kiss under it for luck!”

You’re making up a plan to murder your friends for teaching Diavolo about this while Barbatos studies you thoughtfully.

“If you’ll allow me?”

His voice startles you and you look back up at him for a moment before the words register. You just managed to squeak out a yes before he kisses you and you almost feel your soul ascend out of your body. Barbatos’ kiss is precise and practiced in a way that reminds you just how many more centuries of experience he has on you.

There’s nothing obscene or improper about the kiss, but when you pull away you’re feeling lightheaded and a little weak in the knees. Barbatos smiles just a little before turning back to Diavolo.

“Now, about the cake my lord.”

Simeon

Simeon, unlike the demons, seems to be at least somewhat aware of human world festive celebrations. Some of his knowledge is a bit out of date, but he’s better at this than you expected.

By the time you get to Purgatory hall the place is already pretty well decorated, the decorations lean more towards the religious but you still find tinsel and even a few paper snowflakes dotted here and there.

Simeon greets you as you enter their main common area with a beatific smile and an excited wave. “Oh Y/N, Solomon said there was something I should show you.”

You follow him, only a little wary, Solomon might cause trouble on occasion but Simeon is usually not involved. Usually.

He stops in one of the doorways that you’re pretty sure you’ve never been near before. In fact the corridor behind it looks pretty much unused. It doesn’t bode well for this being entirely innocent, though at least with Simeon involved it’s probably safe.

Coming to a halt he gestures up and you look up towards a sprig of mistletoe hanging in the doorway. Which would explain why it was so far from the frequently used areas of the halls. You smile softly, shifting your gaze from the mistletoe to Simeon.

“Solomon told you to show me this hmm?” You grin, noting the way Simeon’s eyes flick away from yours. “Did he tell you why?”

“Maybe he mentioned it, maybe he didn’t.”

You laugh, looping your arms around his neck and pulling him in for a kiss that leaves you both breathless and flustered. For all he is an angel, Simeone seems to know an awful lot about kissing and how to do it so you’re weak in the knees.

“You know, if you wanted to kiss me you only had to ask.”

“But this seemed seasonally appropriate.” He hums, gently stroking your hair.

“Very seasonally appropriate. And I guess we don’t need to worry about Luke wandering up here and scolding us.” You laugh, kissing his cheek softly.

“Ah yes, that too.”

Solomon

Any mistletoe shenanigans are entirely Solomon’s own doing and he knows exactly what he’s up to.

He’s been helping you with your magical studies recently, much to Satan’s chagrin, and this evening you decided to study in the House of Lamentation in front of the warmth of the fire.

The night starts wearing on and after a few hours of study you’re getting restless. Solomon pauses to glance over at you and sighs. He knows as well as you do that you’re no longer taking this in.

“Shall we take a break?”

You sigh in relief. “Please? I can make us some tea.”

He nods and follows you to the kitchen where Asmo, Mammon and Belphie were sat in the middle of a discussion. You greeted them happily, laughing as Asmo flirted happily with Solomon. You keep up idle conversation while you make tea, missing the small gesture Solomon makes with a free hand and the ripple of magic in the air.

“Hmm, Y/N, what’s that above your head?”

You pause, glancing up as Solomon sidles over with a smile. You were sure you hadn’t noticed the mistletoe hanging there before, and it was a strange place to put mistletoe, but then again you were busy chatting so maybe it had just slipped your mind.

“You’re familiar with the tradition right?”

Solomon holds your chin between two fingers, suddenly very close, his eyes studying your face questioningly. Somewhere in the background you can hear Mammon exploding and Asmo talking about romance but it’s all lost on you with Solomon’s lips hovering so close to your own. 

You don’t trust your voice to answer him, but you do just about manage to nod. You catch the expression of triumph for a brief second before he kisses you. You expected something quick and chaste, but those expectations were swiftly dashed when you felt his tongue brush against your lower lip. Any other day you know you’d have given in, but the clamour of voices behind you are a stark reminder of where you are and who your audience is so you press gently against his chest.

“Oi! Whaddya think you’re doin’ kissing my human like that?!”

“Oh hush Mammon, I think it’s very sweet.”

Embarrassed, you grab the tea and Solomon’s arm, practically dragging him out of the kitchen with Belphie’s eyes burning holes in your back.

“You did that on purpose!”

Solomon shrugged. “Perhaps I just saw an excuse to kiss that gorgeous face of yours and took it?”

“No one hangs mistletoe above a teapot! You did that to annoy them… wait, did you just call me gorgeous?”

“Perhaps. Now, shall we get back to studying?”

You were going to murder him one day. Maybe after another kiss though.

[devildom-dedicated-daydreams]

Comforting You Stressing Over Exams (Simeon, Solomon, Luke Headcanons)

A/N: I said I’d be more active this year, but school has just been hectic so I do apologize for not updating more frequently. I had exams lately and my scores weren’t bad but they were lower than I what I was hoping for. Luckily, I’ve more or less mastered the art of apathy necessary for college students. 

♡＾▽＾♡

Anyway, here are some comfort headcanons from our angels and mage. (I want Simeon so bad, I want one. Why can’t I have him?) 

Simeon

This man.

Sweetest man that has ever lived.

Asks you questions and helps you write flashcards.

Brews you tea or coffee, and brings you healthy bite-sized snacks.

When you're really stressed he surprises you with your favorite bubble tea. 

Gives you massages during your breaks.

Reminds you to rest and super strict when it comes to curfew; he won't let you do all-nighters twice in a row. 

When you break down in the middle of studying, he'll wrap his arms around you from behind and pull you gently to the floor in a huddle.

He'll hug you to his chest and remind you how much he loves you and how he knows you can do this.

(Oh, god, I'm close to crying. I'd sell my soul for Simeon.)

Solomon

Brat.

No, really.

He's one of the smartest people you know, the kind who only needs to listen once to a lecture and understands everything in a snap.

He's a good tutor, but he teases you when you take "too long" answering an equation.

But when he sees the tears in the corner of your eyes, he'll stop and scooch next to you.

He'll rest your head on his shoulder, saying "Sorry, sorry, I didn't mean it. I just can't help but tease you when I see how serious you are."

"So you agree, I am stupid--"

He flicks your forehead. "Silly. Everyone computes at different rates. I tease you because you're cute when you're angry."

You pinch his belly and he laughs.

You bury your face in his chest and he'll list down everything he loves about you.

Luke

Puppy baby brother!

He's also a sweetheart, but a tiny bit sour.

He doesn't seek physical affection or offers verbal reaffirmations.

When he finds you bent over your desk, half-crying, he'll puff his chest and think, "I'm gonna do something!"

And like the baby that he is, he'll make you the most perfect confectionaries.

He doesn't give anyone a piece as he's making his way to your room.

But he's not gonna be upfront about giving them to you.

"I was practicing baking a-and I know you had a test this week so I thought maybe you'd want them. But make no mistake, I didn't bake these just for you!"

You know what's going on though, so you give him a big ol bear hug.

"H-hey! Stop it! You're embarrassing."

He'll be all red and yells at you about how "he's too old for this" but he's not pushing you away.

(I want a brother like Luke. He can bake and he's adorable. I wanna pinch those chubby cheeks!)

[unknwnrm]

Simeon looking at the unwashed dishes: There are better ways to do this you know?

Solomon lighting the dishes on fire: Not as fun though

[aruxn]

I CHOKEDSJALAS pls tell me u are seeing this too I'm---

[step-on-me-lucifer]

What wedding dress the undateable’s betrothed would wear

Diavolo:

Barbatos:

Solomon:

Simeon:

[trickybasterd]

so fellow neuro-divergent people how do you feel about the show undateables because i never once questioned what it would be like to date until i saw that show and the reaction from neurotypical people