I'm ditching the "masking" response. Many allistics don't know what that means and I feel like it's only a factor, not the whole equation.
Person: yeah, but like, how did I not know you're autistic?
Me: masking because you probably don't know much about autism and/or never cared to know about me enough or make me feel comfortable around you as well
We're not entitled to be made comfortable around everyone or that everyone knows about autism. They're also not entitled to information about us. No middle ground = no relationship.
Also
Person: but you don't look autistic, I don't think you are
Me: it really shows how little you know about autism and about me
Talking to people who want to learn is nice, but I'm not wasting my time begging for people not interested in anything but their perception to see me. I was evaluated by a medical professional and got diagnosed. My diagnosis was acknowledged and confirmed by other medical professionals. That's enough for me. (Yes, random family member, your opinion is invalid and I don't care about it!)
I'm not offering kindness to rude people, I'm offering indifference. Their opinion is not my problem.
