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Not today Justin
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@tangledwoodssystem-blog
instagram: @tangled_woods and @tangledjayke
we won’t be on tumblr anymore - far too triggering for some members of our system. You can find us on Instagram :) We’d love to see you guys there, though we’re being more protective of our system and can’t follow anyone who posts pics of ED or SH related things <3 @tangled_woods is our system instagram account, and Jayke has his own account @tangledjayke x
I’m losing my mind a bit the last few days.
Remembered a load of things someone had done to me that were so clearly 100% wrong, so much so that I felt enraged - I felt shockingly empowered to confront the person who had done them. But….
Then I had the idea to tell someone first - to ask a trusted friend if they agreed those things were wrong. And then all of a sudden…
It all dissolved away. I couldn’t cling on to the memories. Like desperately trying to hold on to the fringes of a dream when you wake up and it all gets twisted and mixed and disperses into nothing.
And now I don’t remember a thing. Only that I remembered SOMETHING.
And now I feel nothing at all.
Am I crazy? Please don’t let me be the only person who’s experienced this.
"Should parents read their daughter's texts or monitor her online activity for bad language and inappropriate content?"
Earlier today, I served as the “young woman’s voice” in a panel of local experts at a Girl Scouts speaking event. One question for the panel was something to the effect of, “Should parents read their daughter’s texts or monitor her online activity for bad language and inappropriate content?”
I was surprised when the first panelist answered the question as if it were about cyberbullying. The adult audience nodded sagely as she spoke about the importance of protecting children online.
I reached for the microphone next. I said, “As far as reading your child’s texts or logging into their social media profiles, I would say 99.9% of the time, do not do that.”
Looks of total shock answered me. I actually saw heads jerk back in surprise. Even some of my fellow panelists blinked.
Everyone stared as I explained that going behind a child’s back in such a way severs the bond of trust with the parent. When I said, “This is the most effective way to ensure that your child never tells you anything,” it was like I’d delivered a revelation.
It’s easy to talk about the disconnect between the old and the young, but I don’t think I’d ever been so slapped in the face by the reality of it. It was clear that for most of the parents I spoke to, the idea of such actions as a violation had never occurred to them at all.
It alarms me how quickly adults forget that children are people.
Apparently people are rediscovering this post somehow and I think that’s pretty cool! Having experienced similar violations of trust in my youth, this is an important issue to me, so I want to add my personal story:
Around age 13, I tried to express to my mother that I thought I might have clinical depression, and she snapped at me “not to joke about things like that.” I stopped telling my mother when I felt depressed.
Around age 15, I caught my mother reading my diary. She confessed that any time she saw me write in my diary, she would sneak into my room and read it, because I only wrote when I was upset. I stopped keeping a diary.
Around age 18, I had an emotional breakdown while on vacation because I didn’t want to go to college. I ended up seeing a therapist for - surprise surprise - depression.
Around age 21, I spoke on this panel with my mother in the audience, and afterwards I mentioned the diary incident to her with respect to this particular Q&A. Her eyes welled up, and she said, “You know I read those because I was worried you were depressed and going to hurt yourself, right?”
TL;DR: When you invade your child’s privacy, you communicate three things:
You do not respect their rights as an individual.
You do not trust them to navigate problems or seek help on their own.
You probably haven’t been listening to them.
Information about almost every issue that you think you have to snoop for can probably be obtained by communicating with and listening to your child.
Part of me is really excited to see that the original post got 200 notes because holy crap 200 notes, and part of me is really saddened that something so negative has resonated with so many people.
When there’s finally a good representation of multiplicity
^how we feel about every @multiplicityandme @multiplicityandwe YouTube video! - Y & Jayke
I just wanted to thank you for your kindness, fellow system 💕💙
^this person deserves mountains of kindness^please read their story and help if you can>https://www.youcaring.com/perseus-807661- Y & J...... & S & E & lM & M & co (apparently our entire system is on board with this ❤️)
Laments of a Fronting Alter
#1 Maybe you’re not used to using a body. Maybe you forget body parts exist. Maybe you’ve been all smug thinking you’re managing to come across like a normal functioning human being and then suddenly... you realise you’ve left one of the body’s hands in mid-air and mid-gesture for a good ten minutes now.
#2 Trying to remember that the body needs to be fed and watered regularly.
#3 Figuring out the existence of time and attempting to somehow maintain subconscious track of it throughout your day.
#4 The agony of refraining from puling faces while you’re co-con with the host and they’re managing to actually pass as an NT.
#5 Having to notice and respond to the hosts name being called.
#6 Flying by the seat of your pants through conversation with the hosts friends where you have zero context of what they’re talking about.
#7 When the system ‘out’s themselves as DID to a friend, and the friend has that conversation with host all “does he know he’s an alter?” “how should I behave around him?” “Do I still use your name?” “Will he like me?” all the while being entirely unaware that Host checked out long ago and they are actually asking the Alter in question the questions about the Alter in question... Ahem.
Please help me move from my sexually and emotionally abusive home
https://www.youcaring.com/perseus-807661
Hey Tumblr; I was hoping you could help me out in getting me out of my severely abusive home. Here is the youcaring description:
“My name is Perseus, & I’m a 23 year old mentally & physically disabled transgender person. I’ve lived w/ severe abuse for most of my life, & up until recently I was coping through it. My mother & I lived with my stepfather who abused us both in every form until I was 17 & called child services, got my sister adopted into another family.
Recently, I began trauma therapy, & since I have started recovering repressed memories of the abuse I have endured. One of these was when I was 15, my mother bought a boyfriend & I drugs & when we were high, coerced us into having sex in front of her & masturbated to it. Earlier today I tried to address this in a fight & she blamed me, saying I should’ve said no, & that because she has Bipolar disorder, it excuses it. I believe there are more repressed memories I have not recovered & I have no idea how to cope with this one alone.
Besides this, my grandfather who I also live w/ is emotionally abusive & can become physical at any moment & has tried before. He has a history of hitting my mother & as he becomes more unstable due to dementia, I fear it is only a matter of time before things escalate. I’ve been threatened that if I defend myself if he attacks me, he’ll charge me for assault of the elderly. As I’m writing this, my mom is trying to get into my door & threatening me that if I go to the ER to get mental health help, she’ll lock me out. I don’t have a set of keys & have nowhere to go; my parents threaten eviction often, over trivial things such as eating a slice of bread that I didn’t buy…
The only shelter close only take families, leaving me with not much choice but to apply for Section 8 housing & finding somewhere to live in the meantime, or a shelter farther away. Because of the abuse, I have severe PTSD & Dissociative Identity Disorder & what is called Hashimoto’s Disease, an autoimmune disorder where your immune system attacks your internal organs. This condition is exacerbated by stress. This disease already killed my Thyroid, giving me Hypothyroidism, which I’m now on medication for life for. In 2014, I quit working after urged by my endocrinologist that the stress was too much on my body. I’m currently in the process of getting Disability Social Security but the process takes a while & I’m in a race for time before ending up homeless.
Due to dissociation, I can’t drive, I don’t even have a permit. Wherever I’d be moving, transportation would be needed. In MA, most places for rent around is 700$ + a month, nevermind a phone bill, transpo & other expenses. I’m awaiting emergency benefits from the state, & it is unknown when I can get them. Even still, that’s 303$ a month, not enough for a weeks hotel stay. It’s going to take me quite a bit to stay somewhere safe that is more permanent; I’ll keep checking into shelters, but I’m afraid even then only so much is available…
I’m not sure as much will be needed to be stable & safe, so I’m setting the limit at 3000$ as a starting point but depending on how long it can take for help from the state, I’ll prob need more. On twitter there is documentation of these things as they have happened, including recorded examples of the abuse & msgs of my mother admitting to the sexual abuse, then blaming me. (Here is a link: https://twitter.com/mrgravewalker/status/856267250147446784) I can no longer fake being ok, or hide my upset at the pain & suffering their abuse is causing…
My mother said I would have a place while trying to get disability, but recently said she believes when I turned 18 she shouldn’t have had to care for me anymore, & will gladly "dump me out on the streets,” for I’m “too much to handle.” She told me since I was 8, I’ve been nothing but trouble & wants to be rid of me. I’m scared I’ll never have a place to recover from the abuse.
If you can, please help me get somewhere safe, & know I am so grateful, & if you can’t, for helping spread the message. I’m willing to answer any questions you may have about the situation at hand. Thank you so much.“
TLDR; My mother is sexually abusive, has admitted to it and blamed me for it. My mother and grandfather are severely emotionally abusive & things could escalate to physical at any moment. There is a history of physical violence within my home.
PLEASE HELP MAKE THIS HUGE xxx
-Jayke 😜
oh god. guys THIS IS JAYKE. he *genuinely* does this to the Full On Level in public places.
my friends are threatening to film him.
-Y
A group of rough looking boys walked past me today and all I heard of their conversation was “he’s got that anxiety disorder bro so I went with him so he’d be more comfortable” and it made me realise the world isn’t all that bad
#this is team skull
The pet store I worked at had a pen with rabbits near the front door. On every side of the pen were huge signs saying “You can pet me, but don’t pick me up!” One day two absolutely huge guys came in and one immediately reaches into the pen to grab a rabbit. Before i could say anything his friend grabbed his arm and asked him “did you see the sign?” He said “yeah! it says that you can pick them up but don’t pet them!” Then he went quiet for a moment and softly said “I didn’t read it right did I?” And his friend just puts his arm on his shoulder and said “its ok, i know you’ve got that thing where words get mixed up. Let just pet these cute lil shits” And I still haven’t gotten over that interaction.
I was walking my dog through Boston bc he likes the likes car rides. He’s a little thing tbh we call him short and long. So this huge scary man with a full beard approaches me like “hey can my buddy and I pet your dog? He gets nervous around dogs but your’s is so small I think it’s a good place to start.” Ofc I was like “yes he’s very friendly!” So this guy brings his equally big friend over and they sit on the floor while this man looks terrified of my tiny dog so big man number one asks “can I pick him up?” And i say yes so he picks him up and puts him on man number two’s lap and man number two is abt to freak out and his friend straight up just goes “hey man, it’s okay just relax I’d never let anything hurt you. He’s a good boy.” I’ll never forget it ever bc I know that man looked at me (5'3 , glasses, probably wearing a sweater vest) and my dog (kinda goofy looking little thing) and was like ‘ah yes the two least intimidating living things I’ve seen in Boston all day he’ll feel relaxed around them’ and went out of his way to help his friend. It makes me so happy
A good post, pure.
Another adorable story has been added.
your alter when they find out someone missed them:
THAT’S ME!
-Van
^also me 😂 -Jaykexx
Like a month ago I messaged a craft group about accessibility for wheelchairs and the answer I got was “there’s a lot of stairs but we have cute boys who can carry you”. And it’s…not good. As a wheelchair bound person I largely depend on people when I want to go out and do *anything* so I’m used to it, I laugh it off, make an annoyed post about it and off I go. But I wanna just say a thing real quick.
Even if I wasn’t gay, wasn’t a survivor scared of men, getting help as a disabled person is just…Not a pleasant thing to us! Imagine for a sec how you’d feel being carried up a flight of stairs. You’re a grown person. You’re being touched in an awkward way. You’d rather do it yourself. You’re So Uncomfortable. It’s not where I look for the beginning of a romantic relationship. So like…could abled people stop doing this thing where they think helping us in a condescending and infantilizing way is cute? Cause I’m real tired. Just get me a ramp or lift and I’m cool. I don’t need a dating service when I’m just trying to go about my day
If you’re abled please reblog it cause like…the more ppl knows the better
Connyyyyyy how're u feeling today? Got any nice soapysmellythings in ur bath? Do you (like u personally!) have any besties or relationships or relatives in your system? Jayke <3
Hii! Thanks for the message! I am really good thank you! We are going to a safari park tomorrow so im very excited. So is jess and a few others! How are you?
Yep i am using a think pink bath bomb from lush with radox muscle soak and imperial leather shower gel that smells like marshmallows!! I smell super awesome lol!
My best friend in the system used to be chrystal but she has gone missing for a while :/ i am in an open relationship with sarah and we hang out alot with danny too :)
I know you didnt ask but there is also james and matt in a relationship in the system and ive seen bits and pieces of a possible relationship developing which i totally ship! Lol
in terms of relatives, i have james who is my big brother and i guess legal guardian and matt is my other legal guardian. Ash is my other brother but i dont see or talk to him much. And then theres tommy who isnt an alter. Hes my baby brother and he is really annoying!
-conny
Safari??!! That sounds awesome!! Jealous! We love safari... Been to the Kruger in S.Africa ;) Omg sounds like u crafted a seriously epic bath!! :O
Thats super awesome u guys got some good relationships within ur system :D we think thats super healthy <3 Shame you’re missing ur bestie! Do u know if she’ll be back?
Really interested in your guardians - was that something that was kinda there from the beginning, or did it develop? I’m interested cs I recently ‘adopted our little, Mai :)
Jayke <3
They Would Be The Most Wonderful Cemeteries
PSA: Some wheelchair users can *GASP* walk
Wheelchairs are used for many disabilities; it could be very painful to walk, one may lack the strength to walk, have hyperflexibility, shortness of lung capacity, fragility of joints, muscles, skin etc.
REBLOG so people STOP harassing wheelchair users when they stand up and even WALK out their chairs in public.
^^SO MUCH THIS^^
-Yasmin, (who can walk short distances, but uses a wheelchair to prevent d i s l o c a t i o n s)
Dissociation is the worst defense mechanism; your brain is like “existing here in the real world is gettin kinda difficult so how about you chill out here in the void instead.. oh is this an inopportune time? Are you in the middle of a conversation? Taking a test? Yeah? Ok great welcome to the v o i d”
pretty much sums up the last few days.. ...and my entire life...
Y
