A little bit of everything

Hi my name is Ivy. Welcome to my blog.

[vacuously-true]

The Tumblr Twitter account is literally the only good thing about Twitter lately (or maybe ever)

I'm like 65% sure that's the fucking crab from Moana. Why is Tumblr so obsessed with crabs.

[thefallingdream]

[jads-abum-rat]

[vespertineflora]

[audio transcript]

Woman: He’s fine. He misses you.

Man: Give him my love.

Woman: Will do. 

[woman looks at ridiculous oversized bird]

Woman: SQUAWK

Bird: SQUAWK

THE END

[stability]

Good to know shitposting has been around since the inception of cinema

[itsk-tanafsu]

Please take a moment to appreciate that the first sci fi heroes Fry thinks of are all women.

[glitterstimdealer]

this was specifically to take the piss out of the show’s male fans btw

[aspacelobster-deactivated201812]

EVERY show should take the piss out of their male fans.

[aspiringwarriorlibrarian]

The Men ™ are already crying about He-Man so I’m gonna talk it as a good sign.

“Waaahhhhh they made Adam too androgynous!”

I’m sorry…. this:

is androgynous to you? This Luke Skywalker looking motherfucker? This man with a face made entirely out of angles and his complete lack of lips and his saturated medieval suit?

Compared to THIS?

Original He Man waltzed around the castle in a pink skintight shirt and lavender tights. He let everyone think he was a coward running away from a fight because he didn’t give a fuck about toxic masculinity and he wore his bondage gear into battle. His favorite activities were cooking, using his magic sword to transition, and staring in the camera to tell kids that racism is for losers. If pride parades were a thing back then he would be the guy wearing at least seven pride flags and nothing else.

2021 He-Man is a heavily diluted version of OG He-Man and if you actually watched this show that you said was your childhood, there’s no way you’d think Young Hercules up there is the “woke” version. They watered it down for your delicate sensibilities and you choked anyway.

[sakura-haruka]

I crave attention because I’m a narcissist and I suppose it’s because I’m scared of being alone.

[epthot]

[sunsbleeding]

Love is enough

[dankmemeuniversity]

[ms-andry]

What year is it??

ETA apparently she posted this less than an hour ago and also it’s her first tiktok

[dickneto2-deactivated20210815]

TONY HAWK!?

[oldblood]

collection

[oldblood]

more

[agenttajnesile-deactivated20250]

[martyrwill]

[unclefather]

[tyrannosaurus-rex]

these parents really looked at their vagina fresh child and killed him on sight huh

[powerfulwizard]

When I first read this I was like hah cool he used the name from the random guy on twitt-oh fuck oh no

[turtle-noise]

This took me an embarrassingly long time to get, I had to go to Twitter before it clicked and

[kouvufox-blog]

Welcome to Australia! Where a fast food restaurant literally made a mirrored reflective sea-gull proof packet for their fries so they don’t god damn try to fly down and steal your fries.

[kouvufox-blog]

YOU THINK IM JOKING?

LIGHT? FRIGHT!

[laughingfish]

This is the best thing I’ve ever seen

[eatingcroutons]

The Q&A on Hungry Jacks’s website makes this even better:

[gayavatarstyle]

how the fuck did the fire nation beat fucking anyone their element can't do shit to any of the others

[gayavatarstyle]

shoot fire at an airbender? they blow fire back in your face now you got burn face

[gayavatarstyle]

a waterbender sends a wave at you and you defend with fire? congrats dipshit now you've turned that attack into steam in your eyes at best or boiling water on your skin at worst

[gayavatarstyle]

you throw fire they throw rock you get hit with hot rock war over

[saltytocrusade]

Literally the only way the fire nation fought enemies was with slow technological veachiles (drills and air boats) and fucking AMBUSHING PEOPLE. AND IT WAS MAINLY AMBUSHING CIVILIANS (against the Geneva Convention). The fire nations army is full of war criminals

[princecharmingtobe]

You think they have the Geneva Convention in ATLA? They don’t even have Geneva. 

[gayavatarstyle]

[alivehouse]

fun fact about me is that when i was a kid id write capital E’s with as many of those little horizontal lines as possible and id call them ladder E’s and adults fucking hated them

[alivehouse]

artistic rendition

[ceekari]

All capital letters should have a leveled-up form

So far I’ve got

ladder letters: A, E, F, H, T

humpback B’s and P’s get as many bumps as you think they need

circle O’s, you just keep spiraling in til you feel like you’ve made your point

tree letters branch into smaller versions of themselves ad nauseum: X, Y

spider Q’s, so many legs

Please add your own unsettling godtier capitals!

[catgirltoes]

New alphabet dropped!

[ceekari]

oh my god, it’s beautiful

(future handwritten notes are gonna be so wonderfully cursed now, thank you! :D )

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

well it’s going to take some getting used to, @ceekari (don’t mind the redacted letter between T and U)

But I think i’ve taken a real shine to it! 

[modmad]

recursive

[arkaine-spell]

So i may have done a thing in an insomnia fueled jaunt into insanity.

find an .otf of the font here

[idlnmclean]

This is how new alphabets get invented.

[fuwaprince]

US Helplines:

Depression Hotline: [phone]

Suicide Hotline: [phone]

LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255

Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743

Eating Disorders Hotline: [phone]

Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673

Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272

Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000

Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253

Child Abuse: 1-800-422-4453

UK Helplines:

Samaritans (for any problem): 08457909090 e-mail [email protected]

Childline (for anyone under 18 with any problem): 08001111

Mind infoline (mental health information): 0300 123 3393 e-mail: [email protected]

Mind legal advice (for people who need mental-health related legal advice): 0300 466 6463 [email protected]

b-eat eating disorder support: 0845 634 14 14 (only open Mon-Fri 10.30am-8.30pm and Saturday 1pm-4.30pm) e-mail: [email protected]

b-eat youthline (for under 25’s with eating disorders): 08456347650 (open Mon-Fri 4.30pm - 8.30pm, Saturday 1pm-4.30pm)

Cruse Bereavement Care: 08444779400 e-mail: [email protected]

Frank (information and advice on drugs): 0800776600

Drinkline: 0800 9178282

Rape Crisis England & Wales: 0808 802 9999 1(open 2 - 2.30pm 7 - 9.30pm) e-mail [email protected]

Rape Crisis Scotland: 08088 01 03 02 every day, 6pm to midnight

India Self Harm Hotline: [phone]

India Suicide Helpline: 022-27546669

Kids Help Phone (Canada): 1-800-668-6868

FREE 24/7 suicide hotlines:

Argentina: 54-0223-493-0430

Australia: 13-11-14

Austria: 01-713-3374

Barbados: 429-9999

Belgium: 106

Botswana: 391-1270

Brazil: 21-233-9191

China: 852-2382-0000

(Hong Kong: 2389-2222)

Costa Rica: 606-253-5439

Croatia: 01-4833-888

Cyprus: 357-77-77-72-67

Czech Republic: 222-580-697, 476-701-908

Denmark: 70-201-201

Egypt: 762-1602

Estonia: 6-558-088

Finland: 040-5032199

France: 01-45-39-4000

Germany: 0800-181-0721

Greece: 1018

Guatemala: 502-234-1239

Holland: 0900-0767

Honduras: 504-237-3623

Hungary: 06-80-820-111

Iceland: 44-0-8457-90-90-90

Israel: 09-8892333

Italy: 06-705-4444

Japan: 3-5286-9090

Latvia: 6722-2922, 2772-2292

Malaysia: 03-756-8144

(Singapore: 1-800-221-4444)

Mexico: 525-510-2550

Netherlands: 0900-0767

New Zealand: 4-473-9739

New Guinea: 675-326-0011

Nicaragua: 505-268-6171

Norway: 47-815-33-300

Philippines: 02-896-9191

Poland: 52-70-000

Portugal: 239-72-10-10

Russia: 8-20-222-82-10

Spain: 91-459-00-50

South Africa: 0861-322-322

South Korea: 2-715-8600

Sweden: 031-711-2400

Switzerland: 143

Taiwan: 0800-788-995

Thailand: 02-249-9977

Trinidad and Tobago: 868-645-2800

Ukraine: 0487-327715

(Source)