hang a bag of pennies out side your door

hi I'm Tea any pronouns

[mrsterlingeverything]

Back yard is like fortnite for ants

[infertilityidol]

no baby I wasn't making a dismissive jacking off gesture while you were talking it was a jacking off gesture to communicate that I was listening closely and enjoying what you sajd. like "this makes me so happy I gotta jack it!" y'know?

[teamisc]

*Writhing screaming throwing up* GOD I need to watch more movies

[sarcasmprodigy]

Making women up like it's a job

[chicknwire]

I love tumblr more than IG bc IG feels like I’m posting looking for a job but on here it’s like I already lost the job and my wife and the house and I’m just sitting on the curb talking to myself

[fallingtowers]

just thought you'd like to know that op of that post you just reblogged has a sex kink. yeah ive seen her porn blog and theres like zero inflation or latex or anything normal on there it's all gifs of naked people smushing their bodies together. it's disgusting

[kosmogrl]

[innerchildabortionclinic]

interesting kink assortment on the dash

[reefsharkivist]

go back to sleep puppy *holds chlorophyll over your face*

[eategg24]

haha yay! *starts making sugars*

[m41-d]

i love this post and always reblog it because it reminds me of a game i used to play in the bath tub as a child which was called “plant sugars” and the premise was that i was a plant organism and i had to produce starches to store in my tuber

[anti-parent]

teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek

[anti-parent]

fantastic. i love it. i posted this after my wife said it yesterday and as i was doing it i was like "this can't be an original thought. as soon as i hit post someone's going to say 'you stole this from a tweet from 2014' and i'll say 'no, i stole it from my beautiful wife.'"

[supermariomamafucker]

they need to come up with more words like necrosis and miasma and mausoleum and cadaver and morose and decrepit and stuff like that just so metal bands can expand their vocabulary

[theofficiallorddgc]

[wonderful-emoji]

[technofeudalism]

you guys smoke too much weed you're paranoid as fuck. this horse is fucking sick and is probably super roomy inside i bet we could fit bunk beds in it

[technofeudalism]

so bad news we're gonna need 15 more bunk beds

[ihopejakeydiesnow]

[kosmogrl]

[butchjaycadence]

suck butch dick 2026