Sylvester Stillstoned

Alison Joy Williamson.

[dailycatlove-blog]

[rowdyruffgrrrl]

[laurbyboom]

a man shooting a nerf gun at his light switch from the bed, missing every shot, and going to sleep with the lights on

[vaporwavesimulator]

for those nights when you cant stop thinking about her……….

[papermariostickerstar-deactivat]

Who?

[vaporwavesimulator]

her……..

[serious]

[westkoast-kalifornia]

[beastector-blog]

boyfriend or girlfriend requirements:

you have to kill the spider

[amoosley]

but spiders are cute and innocent! it should be:

you have to catch the spider and release it in the garden

[dyamirityofthelord-blog]

okay

boyfriend or girlfriend requirements:

just get that spider away from me i don’t care if you send it to italy just get it away

[conigliomannaro]

DO NOT SEND THE SPIDER TO ITALY

[dactro]

you’re right

we will send it to france

[deactivated-drawing]

[novemberocean]

[rhubabby]

-_- and :/ are irreplaceable emoticons that emojis will never be able to touch

[redactedbiboy-deactivated201812]

literally 😑 & 😕

[sweetmlnt-archive]

if you think 😕 has the same power as :/ you are a blind fool

[ithelpstodream]

how to tip

[trekkie-lover]

If you do this get the fuck off my blog

[snowconelostinthesauce]

Please understand that they gave a 33% tip, in cash instead of on a card, to increase the odds that the server could keep all of it.

[fatale-distraction]

What they mean by ‘taxation is theft’ is that servers are taxed on the ASSUMPTION that they will be tipped. If they don’t make those tips, they get taxed on them anyway. It is literally theft. By leaving cash and not writing it on the receipt, they’ve allowed the server the option of quietly slipping that 20 into their pocket and therefore not being taxed on it.

[kingrudegyalchina]

Damn I thought folks knew this …

[spaced-queen-deactivated2024072]

Nope. Actually no body ikno knows this

[fork-a-nature]

the lads

[lord-kitschener]

These are the boys you crack open a cold one with

[animals-riding-animals]

[sonofthesummersun]

This is at the National Museum of African American History and Culture. This is a statue of Thomas Jefferson.

Those bricks behind him?

Each one has the name of an enslaved person that Thomas Jefferson owned.

[annearachne]

Also written behind him on the wall is the section of the Declaration of Independance which states all men are created equal.

[lunaeregia]

this is a lot coming from a nonblack hamilton fan

[kettlecom-deactivated20180801]

[beben-eleben]

Punctuation Matters by The Visual Communication Guy

[thewrittenmagic]

I’ll never understand writers who don’t care about punctuation. It adds control,  clarity, meaning, and variety. 

[saramcclarinet]

My English major ass appreciates this so hard 👌🏻🙌🏻

[thatisthecatsmeow]

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

[chulshik]

I was out with a friend tonight doing one of my fave things. Reading the backs of romance novels aloud. Found this gem.

This is honestly the most wild sounding romance novel I have ever seen and thought it might brighten someone’s day.

[island-delver-go]

[creed-of-corruption]

OK FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON’T REALIZE, SANDRA HILL IS THE WOMAN WHO WROTE “ROUGH AMD READY” ANOTHER EROTIC VIKING NOVEL. SOME OF THE MORE MEMORABLE QUOTES BEING:

“As Hilda’s buttermilk bosoms squished up against his granite abs, Torolf almost had a dick aneurysm.”

“Torolf entered her like she was a lottery. His engorged pecker pushed inside her and she felt fulfilled with sexual fulfillment.”

“Her body was like a beautiful flower that was opening and somebody was pushing their dick inside it.”

YOU DO NOT KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE I HAVE READ THIS TO AT COLLEGE. ONE GUY COMPLETELY LOST IT FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES AFTER HEARING THE PHRASE “DICK ANEURYSM.”

[martianbees]