The world as we wish it was.

Scoundrel. Survivor. Newly spawned adult.

[crucifiedeye]

This was parked in front of the club

[goldensunset]

per my last desperate howl at the heavens,

[voidcreations]

Look at my birthday cake...

[dayeadomingo]

We were so enthralled by this leaf on our walk back from dinner last night

[yorgen-sh]

The Chinese shoe manufacturer decided to demonstrate the indestructibility of their shoes

[scarlettohairdye]

And also the indestructibility of that woman's ankles

[teaboot]

This is Peak Yuri media and I hope my beautiful feral daughters love each other forever

[omtai]

Man I miss free the nipple. Its getting warmer and we don’t even have free the nipple anymore

[gramarye]

feminism has backslid so hard in recent years people don't even know what free the nipple means anymore

[briwhosaysni]

To clarify for those who don't know, "free the nipple" isn't about going braless, it's about going topless

No shirt, no bra, completely bare torso, just like cis men are allowed to

It's about desexualizing breasts and "female presenting nipples" and not being criminalized for our bodies if we want to go topless because it's a million damn degrees out. This was a popular growing movement that was still widely known a decade ago!

And the fact that not wearing a bra is so discouraged and stigmatized that people think the movement was about being able to go braless under your shirt in public rather than about being able to not wear a shirt at all says a lot about how far we've backslid in the past decade

[disgustinggf]

"u attract what u fear" AAAAAAAAH financial stability and rough sex

[jellomenace]

Just have to keep drawing until u realize u r actually not that bad

(Hint hint: Goldfish=orange/ the tie ;))

[kosmogrl]

[manwhorewednesdays]

This is actually such a crucial part of healing from neglect and abuse and I have to add to this.

Because indeed, people who like you will not roll their eyes and sigh at the idea of accommodating your needs, they will value your voice and be upset with you about injustice done to you, not at you for "being difficult". They will be happy when you find a way to live a better life, and help you to get there. If you are struggling, someone who loves you wants to see you smile, not tell you to smile because "you have it so good".

[alexseanchai]

[image: tweet by overlyxclusive: "when people love you they find joy in making life easier for you"]

[teaboot]

Can I be honest with yall I don't want to hear SHIT against cishets at pride this year

[teaboot]

"But it's not FOR them!!!" The biggest military power in the world belongs to a christofascist nation overseen by a felon found guilty of 34 federal crimes and has greenlit a gestapo with more direct funding than the entire military of Canada for the purpose of ethnic cleansing. Let Hetero Jessica throw some biodegradable glitter at a municipal parade

[teaboot]

At this point if anyone is trying to exclude anyone benignly pro-queer from a pro-queer space I'm just going to assume you're a fed or something idk like something something destabilize the movement from within or whatever

[findingfeather]

I am making a VERY big point of the Ally flag in all my pride stuff at work.

Feel awkward about people maybe thinking you’re queer but still want to clearly signal “queers are okay with me”? SURE. LOVE IT. HERE’S YOUR WEIRD FLAG.

Don’t fucking at me about allies right now, they are ALSO actually getting fucking killed over us. Take your puri-gay shitty tent somewhere else mine is great with people’s cishet friends and relatives showing up to have our backs.

(“but what if they -“ shitty behavior is shitty behavior I don’t care if you INVENTED queer sex, if you’re acting like a douche i’ll kick you out. wanna act decent and accept the premises of queer coexistence and freedom, cool, i’m not judging you for feeling ok with the gender title they gave you in the delivery room or being attracted to people with the other standard issue title, grab a pop).

[i-am-a-fish]

I JUST REALIZED I HAVE AN ENTIRE TUBE OF PRINGLES OH MY GOD YES YES YES YES YES YES YES

[i-am-a-fish]

something just happened to half of it

[teaboot]

How people get nicknames:

Recipient of a third-degree burn in front of witnesses. IE, "I won't take that shit from a man dressed like a ghostbuster"= "Gostbuster" or "Buster"

A distinctive personal feature or quirk. IE, "Have you noticed how that new guy is always eating bell peppers?" = "Peppers", or "That chick has a massive forehead" = "Forehead".

An embarrassing thing you said or did. IE, "Did you seriously call Dale "Dad"?" = "Junior", "Baby boy", "Sport"

A game of name-mutation telephone. IE, "Donny Clyde" = "Bonnie 'n' Clyde" = "Bonnie" = "Bon-bon".

Irony. IE, calling a tall person "short stack" or a particularly dour person "sunshine".

A 'wrong place wrong time' one-off incident. IE, "He spilled oil on his pants and had to borrow a pair that were way too big and Jim saw him with the waistband pulled up to his nipples and called him 'Parachute'"

A batman-style origin story but not in a cool way: "One time she hit a deer with the company car and when she called the boss to tell her she was crying so hard we thought she was dying" = "Bambi"

The incredibly rare 'admiration' nickname, bourne only once a millennia under the light of the blood moon: "We saw him lift a truck once so now we call him 'iron man'"

+ How Nicknames Stick:

Your fate is determined by The Counsel

You hate it

It's accurate

[notsomeoneyouknow]

This reminds me of an article about how callsigns in movies are inaccurate because they're too cool. Generally your callsign in the military is like "Bepis" because you once pronounced "Pepsi" wrong.

[teaboot]

^^^

[catchymemes]

[pocket-size-cthulhu]

Romeo and Juliet retelling but it's a married couple who are planning to carve time out of their busy schedules to go out together, but she decides to take a little nap to try to get more energy to stay up later, and when he finds her asleep he assumes she's gone to bed for real so he goes all the way to sleep (I'm talking sleep mask + vaporub + white noise + melatonin, or whatever routine people do for a REALLY good sleep) and when she wakes up from her nap and finds him out cold she just goes to bed too. Tragic 😔

[bethanydelleman]

I need to build a collection of these low-stakes Modern Shakespeare retellings

[sinclairsting]

Write if you can.

If you can't write: Edit.

If you can't edit: Outline.

If you can't outline: Brainstorm.

If you can't brainstorm: Rest.

Writing is many tasks. Do whichever ones you can handle and you'll still be making progress.

[ekjohnston]

Resting is so weird. I wrote three novels last year, and I have yet to draft anything this year (ahahahahaha, oh god), but I have been EDITING those books, and now they're all the way through copy edits, and I can finally think about new stuff again, but it's going to take me a month to switch over. And it's hard, because I feel (and look) like I'm not doing anything, but I definitely am. I know what burnout feels like, now. I think I can avoid it. I avoided it last year, somehow, but I know better than to push (except, you know: mortgage).

So yes. Do those things. And don't feel badly about any of them. You need each one.

[valtsv]

"i'm doing this for my wife and kids" justifications are so so so fucking funny like even ignoring the patriarchal arrogance the naked desperation to have an excuse to commit acts of heinous violence and the implications of the family unit as property to be defended and butchered like livestock it's like. if you want a hole to die in so badly grab a shovel and go outside. why are you digging the fucking trenches in our living room man.

[valtsv]

[dogpuppy]

[chickenmim]

Dude... allow me to add to your trove.

I have a folder of these on my phone... I'm not sure what that says about me!

[teaboot]

This has always bothered me too and it didn't make sense until someone older told me that when they were growing up "scare quotes" were used the way we used *asterisks* or ALL CAPS for emphasis

Edit: Oh. The fake kid's book is... dark.