The Scarlett Wolf @the-scarlett-wolf-32 - Tumblr Blog

vigilmaker-deactivated20260810

I don’t know if this is weird or not, but I totes read Mulan as a trans woman! I tend to read all “women who pretend to be men” stories as very similar to my experience. In contrast, I’ve never imagined that a character presented to the audience as male was actually a trans woman.

Is my way much rarer?

In any event, I think we can all love Mulan!

vigilmaker-deactivated20260810

ruinedchildhood

babyanimalgifs

How are penguins not extinct?

coffeepotsmokin-deactivated2018

I am in tears omg

dremoranightmares

whoever timed the film to the music is fucking brilliant this is gorgeous and oh my god i know they’re made of a lot of fat/blubber but this gave me like seven heart attacks

boomboxgod

Clumsy pillows

siriussly-serious

I’ve pulled my tshirt up over my face to try and hide the fact that I am crying with laughter on the coach full of people.

beeshibe

my mom just came to me and ranted about how everyone is making this facebook status that says, “raising teenagers is like nailing jello to a tree”. she was so baffled by this because she said, “you were pretty easy to raise as teenagers. all you did was sleep and eat.”

so to prove some point she’s going to nail a small cup of jello to a tree.

beeshibe

she’s so pleased with her self

incredible

parents are weird

voidbat

yeah but this is about as accurate as it gets.

you say “nail jello to a tree” and most people think jello all by itself.

but if you put any actual thought into what you’re doing and then give it just a little support

well gosh. look what happens.

please tell your mom good job.

mother-teresa-with-a-dick-deact

a shitpost became a teachable moment

fire-is-her-water

My doggo, Ezri, who rarely barks and mostly borks.

When I got her, she’d been abused and would cower and pee at almost everything, and had been mistreated when she’d barked, so she never would. One day months after I had her she got excited on a walk and borked at a bird, and then immediately cower-peed. I had to re-teach her to bark by gathering her whole human pack and having everyone bark and howl and feed her treats and pet her till she got excited enough to join in, and then got more treats. Took a while but I was able to teach her to bork on command (and she’s gotta be excited or she just stares at me like “Sorry, the bork system needs charging”) and she’ll do it happily when she’s excited to go for a walk or upon seeing a friend, and at birds. I love her croaky borking, especially when she started off terrified of making a joyful noise.

merak-zoran

corvigae

What kind of dog is Ezri? I love her!!

fire-is-her-water

I… did not expect this post to blow up this much but I am delighted at all the tags and replies and Ezri has been told the internet thinks she’s a Very Good Dog. :D

She’s a German spitz - in the same family as keeshonds and pomeranians. She might be crossed with something else as her freckled coat, non-pointy nose, and personality are not standard for her breed (they’re usually a lot more high energy and excitable - she’s super laid back and chill). She’s a bit less fluffy than breed-standard too, mostly because she’s grown out from her spring/summer trim (not usually necessary/good for her type of coat but she gets terribly itchy otherwise). It also makes her look like a puppy of a large breed:

Ezri’s best friend is Murder Cat, who is a gentle friend to humans and Ezri, but does things to mice that would make Hannibal Lecter go “Isn’t that a bit much?”

I got Murder Cat as a kitten, and she used to try to nurse on everything when she was small. Eventually, she settled on her favourite thing to nurse on, Ezri, who has never had puppies and a little confused at first but eventually went with it. She grew out of it, but they have stayed snuggly buddies ever since.

New Years here is full of fireworks outside and Ezri gets Vry Scared. I usually set her up somewhere with a snuggly spot right by me, and Murder Cat comes and does this all night:

She goes everywhere with me in my bakfiets (cargo bike) and lets me warm my hands in her fur on cold days.

And her ears disappear if I say her name to get her attention.

ok so great thanks for coming to my TED talk about my dog, good night, drive safe

fuck-customers

life-of-eris

If you had five billion you could hop from job to job, calling entitled customers idiots all across your city, putting the fear of You into every shithead in town until people become afraid to be rude to servers and cashiers, lest you emerge from the back room like some kind of manners-enforcing specter

aceofsquiddles

sj0

you have been visited by the seven magic dragon balls your biggest wish will be granted but only if you reblog

hersheyhipster

Couldn’t risk it.

justjengie

didn’t realize they change colors. now I know o gotta wish.

pinayputa

THIS SHIT IS REAL I GOT THE JOB I WAS NUTS ABOUT BC I REBLOGGED THIS YESTERDAY maybe it’s a coinkidink but it okay just take the necessary steps to achieve what you’re wishing for and YOU CAN DO IT

showerthoughtsofficial

“The camera adds 10 pounds” is a phrase of the past. Now people look better in their pictures than they do in person

kichengunnet

When people say that the camera adds ten pounds it’s because cameras used in filmmaking/TV production have a wider focal length and therefore subjects look wider or bigger. Whereas cellphone cameras have a short focal length that makes subjects appear thinner or smaller.

Nowadays, with DSLR’s and a variety of lenses, we are able to depict a wide range of focal lengths by using one kind of camera.

So that is why most people on social media may seem to look thinner than they do in person (especially in selfies because the front facing camera on phones especially have short focal lengths).

And that is also how the phrase “the camera adds ten pounds” came about.

grayskyluna-art

this is actually so interesting I had no idea

snedic

Empathy: I feel you

Sympathy: I feel for you

Lycanthropy: I feel awoo

gaydrienagreste

it’s the end of incredibles 2. the incredibles drive off to stop crime. the screen goes black. everyone raises their hands to clap when a familiar overture plays. words appear on the screen, reading:

“THE INCREDIBLES will return in AVENGERS 4.”

cityelf

I invite my closest friends and family to a gender reveal party, but when I open the box with maniacal flourish instead of pink or blue balloons, a television screen is revealed.

I dim the lights remotely as we hear Cate Blanchett say, “The world is changed. I feel it in the water.”

Too late, they realise.

The pregnancy? A scam.

The Lord of the Rings editions? Extended.

The doors? Locked.