🌈mckenzy

[tastefullyoffensive]

[inqilabi]

All mothers I’ve ever known were effectively single mothers, even when they had a husband.

[maverick2095]

[tchaikovskaya]

a LOT of women agree with this but men like….. universally object its hilarious

[alexbelvocal]

As Always

[oceanicgf-deactivating-deactiva]

cats be like: ok im gonna radiate serotonin now

[limerancy]

[thelonelyplayboy]

[effewrgtwvtgefd-deactivated2022]

[allmyknivesaremadeoutofbutter-d]

so you just make an effort? and then it pays off?

[capacity]

[picsthatmakeyougohmm]

hmmm

[fuks]

[theycantalk]

directions

[cryptid-sighting]

comics then: funny cat loves lasagna and hates mondays comics now: pigeon experiences a micro-aggression

[korolevx-deactivated20180128]

my mom got a pack of candles and only realized once she started putting them on the cake that they said “birthday boy” and not “happy birthday” so we made do

[flairina]

HABY BIRTDOY

[iguanamouth]

remembering that you inhabit a body and that your physical appearance is inevitably tied into how people perceive you

[jehovahhthickness]

Boys lie so damn much. They can say “good morning” to me & I have to check to see if the sun is out.

[wingkink]

Therapists are just…. Common sense filters

[wingkink]

Me: yeah so I just don’t have the energy to get up and make myself a sandwich or wait for something to cook so I just. Don’t

Her: why don’t you just eat the sandwich components without putting them together

Me:

Her: you can just eat a handful of cheese and some sandwich meat. You don’t have to make a sandwich.

Me:

Me: what

[yoloswag444-deactivated20141017]

i cant believe they named an entire dog breed after pitbull

[mancydrew]

every time i burp it tastes like Arby’s

[puncromancer]

and every time we kiss I swear I can fly

[kittycheshirestuff]

[bi-trans-alliance]

Laverne Cox on the runway at 11 Honoré during NYFW 2019

[stankyleg-deactivated2918973]

WOW!

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]