Fae et. all

Plural system hosted by Fae (she/it). Mid 20s. Polyamorous lesbian. Enamored with kink and fashion history. 🍀

[thefairyringsystem]

Just woke up from a very vivid dream about passionately building and maintaining an isopod enclosure. I cannot begin to express the sheer urgency with which I felt the need to do so.

[thehmn]

One of the most heartwarming things I’ve ever heard a dog trainer say “A pushy pet who makes small demands and communicates their needs to you is a safe pet. It means they trust you and aren’t afraid of your reaction if they misbehave and push your buttons a little”

[bottl3d-oc3an]

you're a poser if you care more about making me bark than making sure i've taken my meds and brushed my teeth

[drowsy-corpsegirl]

The Dom should be praised too

[drowsy-corpsegirl]

Take care of your doms. Praise them. Make them feel cared for and loved. Or you don't deserve them.

[drowsy-corpsegirl]

This applies doubly, x10 tbh, to transfemme doms. You NEED to be nice to her, you NEED to let her know she is doing a good job. That transfemme dom might have a lot of issues with her self worth, she may have been used up and left a discarded husk so many times.

Sorry but I got sick of scrolling through the notes on this on desktop and seeing all the red usernames marked by shinigami eyes reblogging this.

I'm a transfemme dom and I'm proud of it. Take care of us. Love us.

[drowsy-corpsegirl]

And then no one reblogged this version

[theseconstantdreams]

‘Then the unicorns came out of the sea.'

from ‘The Last Unicorn' by Peter S. Beagle

by Lily Seika Jones #FairyTaleTuesday

[autistichalsin]

The test for allyship isn't how you treat an oppressed person who is your friend, family, spouse. It's how you treat an oppressed person you absolutely can't stand who is vile and loathsome in every way.

Do you gender trans people correctly even when they're being absolutely terrible people? Do you refuse to use the r-slur against someone who suicide baited you but is neurodivergent? Do you refuse to snark at a mentally ill person who is being genuinely unpleasant, "go take your meds!"

Do you allow members of marginalized groups to be terrible people without judging their entire demographic for it? One of the most invisible yet vital forms of privilege is the right to be terrible people as an individual rather than as a group. Do you acknowledge that there are bad people in every group, that it doesn't make their group less worth fighting for? Or do you shake your head if you happen to get mistreated by some who belong to a group and insist the entire group is awful and not worth your allyship?

Oppressed people can see how you treat those of us you like, but do you still treat the worst of us with the basic dignity you treat the worst of other groups with?

[aurpiment]

“It’s easy to assume”: someone’s misconception is about to be amiably corrected

“It’s tempting to assume”: someone’s assumption is about to be criticized

“It’s comforting to assume”: someone’s assumption is going to be read for filth

[erisprincipiadiscordia]

[stuckinapril]

I promise you things will get so much better when you start processing people’s behavior as information rather than a verdict on your self-worth. If someone doesn’t text back, suddenly pulls away, whatever it may be, the solution isn’t to put on a tap dance for them and try to regain their approval. It’s not to crash out on them and try to force them to react a certain way. It’s just to take a step back, take a deep breath, and assess what this tells you. What’s this saying about them? What’s this saying about you??

[fullest-circlest]

If you're writing 18th century dialogue, this website lets you search words and phrases to double-check whether they were in use & meant what you intend. It doesn't include every period-accurate use of a word/phrase, but it certainly helped me separate genuine 18th century grammar from the vague tangle of 💬old-fashioned fancy-speak💬 I've internalized from TV and video games.

[my-deer-friend]

Other websites that let you do this:

Johnson's Dictionary Online (thanks @yellowbelliedtoad!) – 1755 and 1773

Green's Dictionary of Slang – 1300s to today

A Classical Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue – 1788

Feraud's Dictionaire critique de la langue française – 1778

[zisurru]

A dictionary of the English and Italian languages by Giuseppe Baretti is a bilingual dictionary from 1790!

[starlit-meadow]

unfortunately, i want to be adored.

[librarycards]

i went to eating enough food world and they're excited to meet you. keep eating lots of meals and snacks and take my hand! we can go there.

[librarycards]

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH QUEER AND TRANS EATING DISORDER HAVERS COME EAT ENOUGH FOOD WITH ME!!!!!!! <33333333

[orcboxer]

happy pride I'm glad I'm gay I'm glad you're gay I'm glad we're both gay and alive

[thefairyringsystem]

Sometimes in order to treat someone like a person, you have to also treat them like an animal.

This is partly a petplay joke, but I also mean it literally. Humans are mammals. You are not a malfunctioning piece of machinery; you are a highly social animal with complex enrichment needs, and so is every person you've ever interacted with.

You need food, water, shelter and sleep. You have a circadian rhythm that's affected by sunlight and computer screens. You need to move your body. You need time to socialize and play with other animals. You need puzzles to solve, variety in your diet and other sources of novelty.

People get weird when their needs aren't being met. If someone you know is engaging in erratic, harmful, or self destructive behavior there is a good chance that something in their environment is very wrong. Often, you have to meet basic animal needs before expecting behaviors to change. Humans are pretty flexible and can learn different habits, but it's easier to do so in a healthy habitat.

Taking accountability for your own behavioral patterns can include changing things in your environment that are feeding into the habits you want to alter. Sometimes you are both an under socialized, poorly enriched German shepherd and its handler.

[wayfire-official]

Sex should have a secondary gameplay loop where you build bases, manage resources, and expand your territory

[flammableengineering]

polycule

[innumerable-voices]

The thing is if the antikink crowd wasn't so ridiculously transmisogynistic I think we could have some really interesting conversations. If you browse the tag you'll mostly see people making really good points about kink and misogyny

"Choking for fifteen seconds leads to a significantly increased risk of a stroke" that's great information and part of why kink educators like me are constantly warning people about the seriously under stated risks of breath play

"Men often use kink as an excuse because they want to be able to hit and control their partners like their grandfather did" I've been fucking saying!

"And that's why we need to abolish kink and sex work and porn" OK you tripped at the last hurdle there but I think if we talked about it we could understand each other

[innumerable-voices]

"The stereotypical dominant woman in tight leather and holding a crop is often put forward as an empowering image but at it's core it's misogynistic, the woman is a sex object even if she's supposed to be in control" yes!

"The stereotypical image of a muscular aggressive black man taking your girlfriend and fucking her in a way that's demeaning to you and her is a based on an wildly racist idea that many people actually believe and that's caused the deaths of countless innocent racialised men" yes!

You're absolutely right and you should say it, now stay with me, trans women are seen as inherently predatory too, we also get killed for much the same reasons and many countries don't even consider it a hate crime, what's more when we're not being portrayed as needy bottoms desperate for any praise or affection we're shown as aggressive dominant tops ready to fuck anything both of these are ways of reducing us to sex objects even if the second is supposed to be in control

We are oppressed and targeted in so many of the same ways, why aren't we allies, why do you hate us

[innumerable-voices]

Sex work isn't going anywhere, it's no different than any other type of manual labor and it's been around literally longer than humans. You won't get it to go away by sticking your head in the sand and pretending it's a product of our society specifically. You aren't protecting anyone by trying to crack down on it or making it more illegal, you're just empowering those who would happily exploit others for their own gain. If you want to end sex trafficking and stop people from being forced or coerced into doing sex work against their will, if you want sex workers to be safe and protected then the way forward is legalising and regulating the industry. Let sex workers form unions and work in controlled environments with people in place to make sure they're OK. Plenty of people have said this better than I ever could

But the next step is 'kink' is just as old and just as inevitable. People get off on weird shit, always have always will. And in fact calling it a 'kink' or a 'fetish' is a step towards protecting people, it means that you can look up safety tutorials, you can find information to do things properly. Gathering in groups, having places that are semipublic to go where there's a better chance of you getting help if the person you're with turns out to be either badly educated or have bad intentions is a step towards protecting people. And I will be the very first to admit it's not perfect, imo the vast majority of kink is done badly, but that's why we need education instead of preaching shame and abstinence

[monstersovka]

✶ PRIDE MONTH ✶