#dr.fudge @thefudge - Tumblr Blog

www.tumblr.com abushelandablog 817787020717015041/you-seem-pretty-close-for-someone-who-hates-her

SORRY BUT sorry BUTTTT

lmaoo i knew smth was up when i got new reviews on the fic i wrote two years ago. i'm glad it's still a terrible & juicy dynamic!

#replies

ev1lfl0wer

they make me insane actually 😮‍💨😮‍💨

#cuties!#babyshark #deershark #emma x brendon

Heard the news about Romania being struck by Russia and sending my best wishes you are all safe and it's just a one off fluke.

thank you! thankfully it was a small incident, but it was very wtf and kind of scary. and, of course, lots of Russia-backed alt-right groups started sowing doubt online and blaming Ukraine for the drone and the E.U. for the war, just the same old tired bullshit rhetoric. even more galling is the fact that those same alt-right parties voted in parliament a few months ago for no drones which enter Romanian territory to be targeted and hit. so, Russia is doing everything it can to destabilize us internally. big fucking sigh.

#what else is new i guess #romania #replies

deleuzes

thank you kate mara (x)

thefudge

screaming about this too

#written specifically for him!!! god #I think I had seen that in the tag already but still much to think about!!#sensory experience @___@

deleuzes

thank you kate mara (x)

#ohhhhh my god this is ringing all the RPF bells incredible #THEY LITERALLY MIRRORED THE DYNAMIC IN THE SHOW WITH JAMIE/NIALL GETTING RICHARD/RUBEN TO PUT HIS BODY THRU HELL???#just the fact that Jamie proposed it and Richard was like yeah have to do it now #jamie's wife getting him to watch richard and him causally remarking oh yeah I got a script from this guy #richard gadd #also going a lil crazy over “I’m grateful he relented #half man #jamie bell

bambicest

“What I want is to be needed. What I need is to be indispensable to somebody. Who I need is somebody that will eat up all my free time, my ego, my attention. Somebody addicted to me. A mutual addiction.” ― Chuck Palahniuk, Choke

#mutual addiction!!! so true #ruben x niall #half man

gasstationpopcorn

#again just living for the soft moments that could so easily tip into violence and the way niall dreads but yearns for that precise mixture!!#ruben x niall #half man

sunshinevettel

Do you, Niall Brandon Kennedy, take Albert Franklin Safadi as your lawfully wedded partner?

#insane moment that only an ao3 user could have come up with richard gadd once again reveal yourself #like this is a precise recipe of mixing just the right amount of horniness and dread and trauma and psychosexual codependency #i remember seeing this moment on the timeline before i watched the ep and thinking it was already a lot!! but in context it's even more!!!#half man #ruben x niall

danielsarmand

Half Man 1.03

#love how niall's face goes from sunshine to dread in just a few seconds #the power of psychosexual brotherhood! lmao #half man #ruben x niall

got this as a submission in my inbox and i'm HOLLERING lmaooo thank you <3

#replies #submissions #half-man #cackling forever

ithappensoffstage

as I'm leaning my head back saying take me, I ain't gonna scream

#half man

isabellaofparma

#finally watching this show and ohohoho they were made in a lab for me #richard gadd reveal your ao3 account #half man #ruben x niall

I, in my corner, with my monstrous needs.

happy a week later May 10th!

#bonkai #bonkaiedit #bonnie bennett #kai parker #may 10th #my stuff #gosh i miss them

Have you ever had an existential crisis? What helped you make peace with it?

(probably having one as we speak!)

yes, i have, and the thing that's most hard for me to deal with is just accepting that, in the moment, my best bet of getting through it is letting myself feel shitty and panicky and forlorn and regretful, without trying to soothe or distract myself. like yeah, i will try to do the latter, but the only way i can make peace is by going through it, allowing myself to be tortured by a million thoughts about a million mistakes. and while i'm sitting in the sauna of despair, things start to seem a little funny. not like maybe haha funny, but just sort of curious. because i realize that, while yeah, some of my decisions could have been more measured & some of my actions could have been way less terrible, the person that i am now that has hindsight wouldn't necessarily do a better job. like, when i think about "fanficcing" some of my past moves, i realize i would rarely change the outcome for the better. the paradox of living, i guess, is that the only way you can stay sane is if you don't have hindsight, if you act without knowledge. because once you have knowledge and hindsight, you get bogged down in possibilities, retroactively correcting or tweaking certain events/actions that will very likely spiral out of your control because you keep trying and trying to get it right. i remember a tweet i read once about the arrogance of thinking that you could undo something, by yourself. like some sort of god of your universe. a lot of time-loop movies & books show exactly this sort of conundrum. you're basically given immortality and infinite second chances and it's usually worse.

so, i guess i think existential crises are ultimately a good thing because they remind you it's not always up to you, and even when it is, you are basically operating on the little that you know, on the small confines of your world. you're never going to be able to live backwards and see the whole picture. from time to time, we're reminded that, wow, i don't know what the fuck i am doing, and i think ultimately, what we have to be able to say is, thank God for that.

#replies #my thoughts #existential crisis #existentialism