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@thesoberyorkshireman
The Interview And What Happened Next
The Interview And What Happened Next
Part 2 of the interview and what happened when I got back to Leeds
In part 1 of this blog post titled First Sober Job Interview I left you where I was driving back to Leeds at 2am, after having an interview the previous day. Well this was just the start and its why I had to make this a 2 part blog.
Thing is because I struggle to write enough, then when I do I write too much and they become…
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First Sober Job Interview
First Sober Job Interview
My first ever interview for a job sober, which wasn’t followed by an afternoon in the pub
Just last week I was asked to go for a job interview at the drop of an hat.
I was down in my new house on a two day break to look for work. I’d had a morning of driving around Bracknell popping into various warehouses, asking for positions.
It was lunchtime and Claire and myself had arranged to meet in Costa…
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Quitting My Job
Leaving behind some good friends, colleagues and customers
Back in July I revealed in my blog Growing up that I was making the move to live with my girlfriend in Ascot. Well today I quit my job and tomorrow I will packing up the car with all my belongings and heading south.
Six and a half years ago I started at this company. They took me on with only a years experience of lorry ( LGV) driving…
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My Sober Valentines Love Story
My Sober Valentines Love Story
Valentines Day 2019, My Sober Love Story
Pig Of A Man
Back in June 2016, as you may know, I quit alcohol.
Not only did I do that but I also quit every single dating site I was on.
Why?
I took a conscious decision that I needed to find my true self, my real self. Not the one I’d been hiding behind through drinking.
You see, I used to use dating sites to find women for my selfish needs. A…
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I Need Help With My Drinking
I Need Help With My Drinking, stuck at rock bottom and nowhere to turn. Alcohol starting to control you. Alcohol destroying you.
Are You Suffering With Your Drinking Habits, Feel Alone And Nowhere To Turn This Was Me Back In Early 2016
“I need help with my drinking”. Words I often uttered to myself on a daily basis. See If you’ve read my earlier posts you’ll realise how much of a heavy drinker I was. How much I was drinking on a daily basis, but for those just reading this blog post I’ll give you an insight. My daily life…
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12 Days Of Staying Sober At Christmas
12 Days Of Staying Sober At Christmas
Top Tips For Staying Sober This Season. From The Sober Yorkshireman
Wether you’re just trying to go sober or your far down the road to recovery. This party season is one of the hardest times of year for staying sober. Just for starters you’ve got the works Christmas party. Not to mention all the other drinking occasions like, drinks with girls/lads. Drinks with school mums, Christmas eve drinks,…
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Blackpool Illuminations
Family trip to Blackpool just like old days
Saturday morning after an amazing date night with Claire watching Queens Bohemian Rhapsody. We wake to the sound of rain pitter pattering in loft windows. Today’s day we’re heading to Blackpool illuminations something we always did as kids with our parents. This will be the 4th time I’ve taken Elishia my daughter on this trip.
At this point we’re still…
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Start Recovery Leeds
Start Recovery drug and alcohol help.
Start Recovery is a private counselling service based in Leeds, West Yorkshire specialising in alcohol problems, drug problems, substance misuse and addiction. If you, or a loved one is having problems with drugs or alcohol and require professional and discreet private counselling, and you live in the Yorkshire area, then you have come to the right place.
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Growing up
No not another blog about my life growing up. A blog about growing up these past 12 months. Where I was 12 months ago
Just a little over 12 months ago I’d done a lot of growing up. I’d reached 12 months sober and life was becoming great for me. I’d really started living a life of the true me I believed. The thing was when I quit drinking in June 2016 I made a pact with myself. It was to rid…
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Sober stag party
How I survived a stag party sober, whilst been best man. Lead up and planning
So for anyone who reads this blog. Back in January 2018 my baby brother shocked me by asking me to become his best man One Of My Proudest Moments. Shocked as we’ve always had a little bit of a love hate relationship. All due to my drinking habits and lifestyle. So as I was best man I had to organise the best stag party…
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Two Year Sober The Video
Two Year Sober The Video
Listen to how TheSoberYorkshireman has turned his life around in the past two years.
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2 Year No Beer
2 Year No Beer
The Lows And The Most Amazing Highs Of My Second Year Sober Brief Back Story Leading To 2 Year No Beer
Well guys its here my 2 year no beer anniversary of been sober. Back on June 1st 2016 when I’d decided on my stop date I had the worse fears about giving up the one thing I loved and hated in equal measures. Drink was my life and when I say that I don’t say it lightly. I was drinking on average…
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Completing My First Liverpool Marathon
Completing My First Liverpool Marathon
Liverpool Marathon 2018 Morning Pre Race
Well its Saturday 19th of May and day before Liverpool marathon also Royal wedding day. I wake early and get all my bags packed. Making sure I pack all the essentials first, running trainers, flip belt, gels, head buff, HR strap, socks, new running vest and shorts. Secondly I start packing a double overnight bag as my and my gorgeous girlfriend are making…
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Marathon Training
Trying to train for my first marathon whilst fighting elements and my mind Pre season training blues
It’s December I’ve had 2 months off since my last race and start of preseason training. Well that’s what it’s suppose to be except I was sat nursing a frustrating chest infection. Coughing up my guts and in a serious low spell. All I could do was rest and fill my body with anti-inflammatory pills…
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Guess it’s true when your least expecting it. Up it pops and bites you in the arse.
So many many months ago I wrote a blog post Can I Sober Date on why I didn’t think dating whilst trying to stay sober was a good idea. The reason I wrote that post was I’d decided to take a year of quitting alcohol and finding myself. See I used to go on meaningless dates, get with women I knew weren’t right for me. Then find a way to break it off after 4-6 weeks. Mainly because I was missing the pub and the craic with the lads. Guess I wanted it all back then, the single life and a partner. That combination never works, which is reason I gave myself 12 months off. This actually turned out to be 18 months off in the end. I’d rediscovered myself in those 18 months, lost weight, run lots of 10k races, completed an half marathon, started eating healthy and generally feeling good about myself. So much so that I decided to think about a career change in personal training, so signed up for a course. Then as I’d joined a triathlon club I pencilled in lots of triathlons. Was going to be a year I competed in one. Also started coaching people online to start running and had ideas to be online and 1-2-1 personal trainer. And that’s where it happened……….
Bit in the arse
As I’m on lots of sober sites via Facebook I had the idea to tout for potential clients on a few. Well it worked from one site I got 3 interested parties. On another site I got many more all beit more inquires to cost and how it worked. Then this one person seemed very keen to find out how it worked and how I’d offer it. So we struck up a messenger conversation and chatted about how I’d start a plan for her and what it would entail. Then she came out with it that she couldn’t afford it right now but it’d be something she would be keen to do when she could afford to. We carried on chatting exchanging messages and even had the odd phone conversation. As I’m not just experienced in coaching running I’m also experienced in how to stay sober and she was 8 months in. So we had a lot in common lots to talk about and things just flowed naturally. We discussed how to cope with pressures of life whilst not running home to bottle of wine or bottle of lager. How some days are tougher than others. General chit chat and advise really but nothing to do with running coaching at all.
Iron wall
So the days progressed into 2 weeks of talking or texting everyday. The conversations flowed we laughed and joked made each other smile each day but I was getting doubts. See I put up an iron wall when I quit drinking. No woman was getting through that for reasons of my past. I get hurt, they cheat on me, take me for granted, take my generosity and throw it back in my face. This woman was melting that barrier I was getting feelings for her, this couldn’t happen I needed it to stop.
Iron Wall
So I did what I thought would solve this and get my wall back up. I composed a message telling her all of my home truths all of my past, things that even my closest family and friends don’t know about me. All in hope the wall would rise again. It worked the reply came back that she didn’t want anything to do with me no more leave me alone. I got mixed emotions though on one hand I was relieved I was back in control of me, the wall is up and I won’t get hurt. On the other hand I felt a massive sense of loss, I’d hurt this woman and it’s hurting me knowing I’ve done that. I wasn’t feeling good in myself I felt hollow and ashamed.
The call
A day or two went by and I heard not a lot from her. I didn’t expect to I’d hurt her and I was hurting too. Then about 3 days later I got a message saying can we talk. I didn’t agree at first I didn’t want to hurt her anymore. Plus I was hurting and it could be emotional. I finally agreed with the call emphasising that we would only stay friends and nothing else. We had the call over 45 minutes whilst on my tachometer lunch break, I’m a trucker as you know. Everything came out in this call.
The Call
It was the lay it all bare conversation, no holds bars talk. The type of talk I’ve never had with a woman before. I don’t like getting my emotions out and that’s what this talk did. After the 45 minute we agreed to stay friends and continue to talk. We talked daily and messaged lots in the following weeks, so much so that we agreed to meet as friends. We made plans to meet which was easier to talk about than do. All because I’m a Yorkshire boy and she lived in south of England. I’m not good at leaving Yorkshire I’m a bit of a homely guy. Comfortable where I am and not one for change or things that scare me like meeting people from miles away.
Our first meeting
We decided on a date. A Saturday after I’d taken my daughter home. So I dropped my daughter at her mums and headed down south. 4 hours journey and I arrived in the south, safe and sound it wasn’t that scary after-all. I pick this lady up and we headed out for the afternoon to get to know each other more. Still on the premise of just been friends and getting closer. After an amazing afternoon I took the lady home and headed for my hotel. We didn’t stop chatting on text after I got back to hotel.
Then in morning I had to get up early as I had an OYNB Social in Manchester at lunch time. Thing was Saturday went so well I got up earlier and made a detour to see so called lady before I headed north. We embraced and I headed up north with tired eyes but the most amazing grin on my face hoping to see this woman once again. In the coming weeks we chatted more staying on the premise of been friends
The fall of the iron wall
In the following weeks we chatted more and more. Things were starting to turn more away from friends and progressing to something more. We’d been on our first sober date a big step for most who had alcohol problems. Plus off the back of ‘THAT’ call a few weeks back when we both laid it bare. We learnt to talk more openly and express our feelings. I didn’t admit to her that I was getting feelings for her but I was. See she was melting the iron wall, making me realise that someone can have feelings for you that are genuine and not fake. She understood me and I understood her, we talked about things that niggled us and sorted them there and then. We decided to meet again this time clearly not as friends and we stayed the night together. This followed with a few more trips to south for me over a few weeks.
We’re now a quarter of way into 2018 and in that time she’s melted my heart. So much so we celebrated new year together. Celebrated her birthday and valentines day in London and Portsmouth. Were making plans for my birthday in April. She’s met my family and I’ve met some of hers. We’ve made it official and are making many many more plans for the future. The icing on the cake has to be she has met my daughter. No one in the past would ever come near my daughter. She is the most precious gift to me and I would not let anyone into her life that I didn’t believe in. Also someone that might up sticks after a few months. So this really cemented what I feel for this woman. Thank you for coming into our lives and fighting for me. We shall keep been open and honest and I look forward to our future.
Birthday and Valentines Gifts
Portsmouth Trip
London Trip
London Tower Bridge
Finding Love Guess it's true when your least expecting it. Up it pops and bites you in the arse.
One Of My Proudest Moments
Amazing 2018
This weekend was my daughters 6th birthday. I’m so proud of the little girl she has grown into. For those that don’t know me my daughter was a gift. She is also the greatest force behind me becoming sober. For the first four years of her life I was still been the single lad. Going to the pub every night self destructing and feeling sorry for myself. See only time I actually didn’t…
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Finding Happiness
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