Mostly rants and gushing about Friends (Monica/Chandler) and Good Omens (Aziraphale/Crowley), with smattering of Percy Jackson, Harry Potter and The Hunger Games. I also have an Arya and Gendrya blog @my-arya-underfoot
Emily’s Follower Appreciation Event 🌷
⤷ 💝 I GOT YOU: a f.r.i.e.n.d.s playlist
when colors turn to shades of grey with the weight of the world at the end of the day, oh, what would I do without you?
for @userlaylivia ♡ playlist / songs ↘
Friends is a show about friends who become your family, so this is a playlist of songs for those people; songs I hope would bring comfort, reassurance, and strength.
SATELLITE CALL by Sara Bareilles / "this is so you'll know the sound / of someone who loves you from the ground / tonight you're not alone at all / this is me sending out my satellite call." Starting this playlist with a reminder that no matter where you are, you're not alone—I'm reaching out with my heart, sending out a satellite call to you anywhere you are, reminding you I'm here.
PLEASE STAY by Lucy Dacus / One of my favorite parts of this song is when she sings "call me if you need a friend or never talk to me again, but please stay." It feels like such pure, unselfish love—if you need me I'm here, or if you choose to never talk to me again, that's okay as long as you stay.
CALL YOUR MOM by Noah Kahan & Lizzy McAlpine / "Don't let this darkness fool you / all lights turned off can be turned on / I'll drive, I'll drive all night / I'll call your mom." Whatever you need, I'll do it, as long as you get through this with me.
BE STILL by the Fray / This was sent to me by someone when I was having a really hard time, and I remember crying on my bed, listening to this song as though it could surround me in a hug. To me, it's a hug in song form.
SURROUND YOU by Echosmith / "Wherever you are / whenever you need me / just crawl in my arms / oh, and I'll hold you beside me / I want my love to surround you."
HAS ANYONE EVER WRITTEN ANYTHING FOR YOU by Stevie Nicks / This is another song that was sent to me by someone and I'm so glad; I probably never would've heard it otherwise. The lyrics are so beautiful. My favorites are: "so if not for me then do it for yourself / if not for me then do it for the world." Find a reason to keep going... no matter what it is, it's enough.
YOU MATTER TO ME by Jessie Mueller & Drew Gehling / Even though this song has some romantic undertones, it doesn't necessarily have to be romantic. And it's one of my favorites because the message is so simple and so profound: you matter to me. What you say matters, your very existence matters to me.
FOR GOOD by Idina Menzel & Kristin Chenoweth / Nothing I could say could ever do this song justice, and the lyrics really say it all.
WHAT WOULD I DO WITHOUT YOU by Drew Holcomb & the Neighbors / The featured lyrics in this gifset are from this song, and it has such a beautifully simple message: what would I do without you?
LET YOUR HEART HOLD FAST by Fort Atlantic / "This too shall pass" in song form.
CALL ME ON YOUR WAY HOME by Emily James / There are so many was to say "I love you," including "text me when you wake up" and "call me on your way home."
SOMEONE WHO LOVES ME by Sara Bareilles / Some of the most beautiful lyrics I've ever heard and what I hope all of my friends feel with someone in their lives, whether it be me or someone else.
I GOT YOU by Leona Lewis / "For better, for worse / I got you."
FEELS LIKE by Gracie Abrams / One of my favorite songs to begin with and all the more so when I found out it was written about her best friend. I love the feeling of wonder it describes—"met you at the right time / this is what it feels like."
I'M ONLY ME WHEN I'M WITH YOU by Taylor Swift / Such a beautiful way of describing friendship and a beautiful type of friendship to experience, one I hope all my friends experience.
WITH YOU by Colorfire / This song always reminds me of friendship because when I graduated middle school, one of the friends in my friend group made a video of us to this song. I like how it says "keep turning, turning;" there's a feeling of time passing in the song, but that friendship and relationship stays constant.
SWEETER THAN FICTION by Taylor Swift / "I'll be one of the many saying look at you now, look at you now / I'll be one of the many saying you made us proud, you made us proud."
RAINBOW by Kacey Musgraves / A final hope for this playlist: hope that you'll make your way to the other side, that you'll be able to see the rainbow that's been there, maybe hidden out of view. A promise that when you can't have hope, I'll have enough hope for the both of us until that hope—that rainbow—is once again visible.
The most ridiculous aspect of all this 'it's just sisters being sisters' nonsense is that we actually do see an example of siblings being siblings with the other Stark kids.
The affection and concern for each other amongst the Stark brothers - Robb and Jon embracing each other fiercely in their parting goodbye, their care and concern for each other, Robb telling Bran they can visit Jon at the Wall, Jon nearly deserting the NW for Robb and Robb telling Catelyn - “You forget. My father had four sons.”
Are the 'this is just how sisters are' folks implying that the boys can be loving and affection brothers with each other while 'sisters being sisters' is just bullying, shaming one's appearance and nonconformity and not caring that their little sister has been literally attacked with a sword? How very sexist of them.
Jon and Robb have that complex and very human sibling bond, where when they were little children Robb hurts Jon with his words and now in their teens, Robb has a deeper empathy for Jon than anyone else.
There's a reason Arya felt really alone and missed her brothers while in King's Landing - that was where the real sibling love was.
That was when Arya missed her brothers most. She wanted to tease Bran and play with baby Rickon and have Robb smile at her. She wanted Jon to muss up her hair and call her "little sister" and finish her sentences with her. But all of them were gone. She had no one left but Sansa, and Sansa wouldn't even talk to her unless Father made her. - Arya, AgoT
She went back to the window, Needle in hand, and looked down into the courtyard below. If only she could climb like Bran, she thought; she would go out the window and down the tower, run away from this horrible place, away from Sansa and Septa Mordane and Prince Joffrey, from all of them. Steal some food from the kitchens, take Needle and her good boots and a warm cloak. She could find Nymeria in the wild woods below the Trident, and together they'd return to Winterfell, or run to Jon on the Wall. She found herself wishing that Jon was here with her now. Then maybe she wouldn't feel so alone. - Arya, AGoT
So we do see siblings being siblings amongst the love the brothers have for each other and their love for their sisters, especially Jon's concern and love for Arya. Bran is concerned for Sansa's well being and Sansa is confident that Robb will win. This is all siblings being siblings - not bullying and throwing siblings into danger for selfish reasons.
So it's not that GRRM cannot write affectionate and complex sibling dynamics and siblings being siblings - he has done so with the rest of the Starks. It's just that the character of Sansa was created specifically to create that discord amongst the Starks and so we end up not getting a loving sisterly relationship between the Stark sisters like we do with the brothers.
Now one can criticize the author for choosing a female character to create that discord or for not writing in a strong sisterly female relationship like he did with Jon and Robb or Robb and Bran or even the beautiful brother/sister relationship we get with Jon and Arya.
That's perfectly legitimate to critique the narrative from a Doylist perspective and, if Sansa is one's favorite character, to call out GRRM for not giving Sansa the same sibling dynamics he has done for Arya, Jon and Bran.
What is not okay is to equate Sansa's treatment of her little sister Arya in AGoT as 'just sisters being sisters', or even more egregiously 'that's just how older sisters are' and attempting to normalize the bullying and mocking of one's appearance.
An elder sister is typically one of the most protective in a family, IMO and we see that in Arya's concerned thoughts about Bran and Rickon in Winterfell after she goes on the run and in how Bran clutches Arya's hand for protection when Robb/Jon prank the younger ones with a ghost.
We have Sansa's POV chapters and at no point is Sansa ever concerned for Arya the way Jon and Bran are concerned for their sisters in King's Landing in their POV - which is what siblings being siblings means in my books. Quite the opposite - Sansa victim blames Mycah and Arya for sadistic Joffrey's actions, throws Arya under the bus by telling Cersei that it's Arya who is the traitor and forgets to even ask where Arya is and what happened to her when things go south in KL.
AGoT Sansa is a rather shitty elder sister to have. However, Arya has loving brothers in Jon and Bran and I can't wait for her to reunite with characters who genuinely love her, want to protect her, look after her and have showed concern for her well being.
And wanting Arya to be with characters who have shown her that love and affection in the actual text of the books instead of a sister who bullied her and didn't care a bit for her is not sexism, no matter how much one attempts to gaslight the fandom with faux feminist nonsense.
Let’s talk about John/Elizabeth (Stargate Atlantis) and Rick/Evie (The Mummy)!
military man with a checkered past that’s placed him under disciplinary action gets saved by a female academic who’s in search of a lost city.
along the way they must gather a band of comrades, including her annoying brother (Rodney/Jonathan) and a mysterious sword-wielding warrior (Ronon/Ardeth Bay), to defeat an ancient evil force.
overall aesthetic: handsome action hero man who favors shirts rolled up at the sleeves and accessorizes with wristbands and a nice sidearm; lovely brainy woman with curly hair who is always elegant and stylish
opposite yet complementary skill sets: woman of words, man of action; she’s a nerd, he’s the muscle; BUT THEY LEARN FROM EACH OTHER over time and it’s beautiful
(the whole ‘let’s do it your way’ exchange from the beginning of ‘The Mummy Returns’ *chef’s kiss*)
the way John learns to value diplomacy and Elizabeth learns that sometimes diplomacy won’t work
he goes in guns blazing, she’s more of a peacemaker
his associates tend to get shot (John: “I’m sorry for shooting everyone!”/“Forget it, O'Connell. Every time I hook up with you, I get shot!”)
Evie, when staring down a potential gun battle: “Now now, let’s be nice children. If we’re going to play together we must learn to share.” AND JUST THE WAY RICK WILL LISTEN TO HER ABOVE ANYBODY ELSE, the way she steps up to him, places a gentle pressure on his arm, gives him a look… and he backs down. I think of Sparky every time I see it and I LOVE IT SO MUCH.
I rate my couples based on how much one LOSES IT when they think the other is dead: both Rick/Evie and John/Liz are 10/10.
John’s one-man-army rampage in ‘The Storm/The Eye’
Rick’s march into the Scorpion King’s chamber, fighting like he’s got nothing to lose
both instantly go soft the minute they learn that Evie/Liz are in fact alive
ALSO just a hint of danger to Evie/Liz sends Rick/John into full on protective mode and I love it
TELL ME a Sparky kid wouldn’t end up like Alex O’Connell. A smart-mouth like his dad, but brainy like his mom.
so much respect for each other
mutual life-saving
also, the scene in the pic up above: adorably awkward and thoughtful gift-giving
Surely someone must have written the Everlark Gilmore Girls AU right? Because like -
Fiercely independent single mother Katniss Everdeen raising her sweet, intelligent daughter Prim (who is so close in age they’re practically sisters), and friends with the bakery/café owner Peeta who keeps her fed in cheese buns and bread, and sees her everyday while quietly and patiently pining.
FT: Best friend Madge who Katniss later opens a business with. Grumpy town eccentric Haymitch. Flamboyant dance studio owner and gossip Effie. Prim's best friend Rue who Katniss also ends up mothering because that's who she is. Estranged mother Mrs Everdeen who Katniss felt abandoned by but adores Prim. Local fashion designer Cinna who took Katniss in when she first arrived.
And then Prim’s father and Katniss’s teenage sweetheart Gale comes back around periodically wanting another chance but doesn’t realise they’ve changed too much to ever be together.
Everyone that has met Crowley (and didn't get too involved with the supernatural. I'm looking at you, Maggie and Nina) sees him as sleek, and stylish, and modern, and cool, and suave (and, honestly, hot as fuck. Wouldn't be surprised if half of Soho desired him). And that's exactly the image he tries to portray to the populace in general. He's a cool guy with a cool outfit and a cool car and he doesn't have a care in the world.
This is helped by the fact that he rarely talks to anyone outside of Aziraphale. If you notice, in the show, Crowley never goes after any human to converse like Aziraphale does. He keeps quiet. Keeps to himself. Cultivating that aura of mystery. He only talks to others if the circumstances force him into it. Alas, he is (mostly) polite and charming about it, but it's not something he seeks
Even Maggie and Nina only had a peek under the curtain and saw a bit of the mess of feelings thats under Crowley's skin and that's because both Aziraphale and Crowley kept fucking around with them.
In the whole world, Aziraphale is the only one who KNOWS him. His imperfections and little detail of his soul. He's the only one who knows how actually ridiculous Crowley's laugh is. His sarcasm. His worried expression. The way he mumbles over consonants without saying shit when he gets caught off guard or nervous. The way he uses his hands a lot when he's drunk.
Sure, Aziraphale still thinks he is hella cool and suave and chill, but he also has a front seat view to how much of an dork he actually is.
It's been 6000 thousand years and Crowley let Aziraphale (99%) in. (Yes, 99% because Crowley would never let anyone see him cry. Not even Aziraphale. Almost, but not quite)
And now, Aziraphale is gone. For the first time since Eden, Crowley is absolutely alone. There's no one in the surface of the Earth that actually knows him. With whom he can relax and put down the mask for a little bit. He has no other choice but hide behind the curtain perpetually because he doesn't trust anyone else.
And if given another 6000 years without Aziraphale, I doubt he would let the mask down with anyone else like he did the angel.
He has made that mistake once, he wouldn't let himself make that mistake again. Because he is the bitten one that trusts no one.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED ON NOVEMBER 5TH AND WHY IS TUMBLR FREAKING OUT I AM SO CONFUSED
Oh, bless you for not knowing haha
November 5th 2020 was one of the most absurd days in internet history, and frankly, in overall history.
So the world is trembling over the US election right. The votes are being counted, everyone is on edge and even over here in Europe, people are holding their breath because whoever wins this election could change the earth as we know it. Around that time, the third wave of Covid hits (I think), and sends us all back into lockdown.
Then, on Nov 5 specifically, there's this moment where Nevada's votes could make all the difference (that's why sometimes, Nevada pops up in the shitposts too). And Nevada is slooooow. The results aren't coming in, and everyone is constantly checking for updates. Also apparently, Georgia and Pennsylvania are turning blue (democratic) for the first time in ages (or ever? don't know, I'm not that familiar with US history) but anyway, it's unprecedented.
On the same day, the romantic relationship of Dean Winchester and Castiel (Destiel), two characters of the show Supernatural, becomes canon after 15 seasons...but in a really weird way that is dissatisfying to most of the fandom (I think. Not in that fandom either). Now the fandom in itself is huge though, one of the biggest fandoms on Tumblr ever, and there's this sort of massive Spn renaissance happening that just consists of...complete disbelief lol.
On top of that, rumors of Putin's resignation arise, being widely spread through the Supernatural fandom's Destiel shitposts. This, again, could change world history if true.
And at this point, everyone's just going crazy-town banana pants.
Because of the sheer absurdity.
AND I LOVE IT.
Because one person summed it up in the following sentence that went viral and honestly explains best what the heck happened on that day:
And this sentence MAKES ME COME ALIVE. Because DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY FACTORS HAD TO WEIGH IN FOR SOMEONE TO UNDERSTAND THIS REFERENCE????????????????
It's a meme consisting of at least 5 other events to explain the 5th of November feeling. The peak comedy being that this is the first sentence of "My Immortal", the worst fanfiction ever written, implying that November 5 2020 reads exactly like that.
It's a cultural treasure, that's what this is.
And I'm just like...WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE. WHAT A TIME TO BE ON TUMBLR. WHAT AN HONOR TO WITNESS THAT TRAINWRECK OF THE US PULL ITSELF OUT OF THE DIRT AND LIVE ANOTHER DAY. ALL IN THE MIDST OF A GLOBAL PANDEMIC. FAITH IN HUMANITY RESTORED. RELIEVED FOR ALL MY US MUTUALS.
HAPPY DESTIELPUTINELECTION DAY ANON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This explanation is neglecting to mention that, due to the high saturation of gifs of the relevant Supernatural episode at the time, many of us (including those of us who don’t give a shit about supernatural) were somehow learning about important world news via Supernatural memes. Which was just an extra layer of absurdity.
It’s also why you occasionally see important world news being delivered via a very specific Supernatural gifset.
Oh gosh I'm actually so keen to talk about this so thank you for the opening!
Context: Responding to akaitsukicat's artwork of Crowley and Aziraphale separated by a glass wall, I said that the reason we're all such wrecks over their kiss is because after 6000 years in canon and 33 years in real life, that kiss was "taking away the glass".
The glass is a metaphor that media scholar Henry Jenkins uses to explain the appeal of slash, originally published in 1993. Here, "slash" refers to queer re-interpretation of heterosexual media, including transformative works exploring those readings.
This is what Jenkins says about the glass:
When I try to explain slash to non-fans, I often reference that moment in Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan where Spock is dying and Kirk stands there, a wall of glass separating the two longtime buddies. Both of them are reaching out towards each other, their hands pressed hard against the glass, trying to establish physical contact. They both have so much they want to say and so little time to say it. Spock calls Kirk his friend, the fullest expression of their feelings anywhere in the series. Almost everyone who watches the scene feels the passion the two men share, the hunger for something more than what they are allowed. And, I tell my nonfan listeners, slash is what happens when you take away the glass.
The glass, for me, is often more social than physical; the glass represents those aspects of traditional masculinity which prevent emotional expressiveness or physical intimacy between men, which block the possibility of true male friendship. Slash is what happens when you take away those barriers and imagine what a new kind of male friendship might look like. One of the most exciting things about slash is that it teaches us how to recognize the signs of emotional caring beneath all the masks by which traditional male culture seeks to repress or hide those feelings.
The vid I refer to, inspired by Jenkin's comments, is The Glass by thingswithwings. It's a beautiful vid, sad and hopeful and empowering, with a very moving commentary on fandom history. It was originally published in 2008, which is relevant to understanding the position it takes in the dialogue around queer relationships in media.
Here's thingswithwings' summary of the vid, as it appears on YouTube:
Henry Jenkins, speaking of the Spock death scene from Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, said, "slash is what happens when you take away the glass." It has been said, in response, that death also happens when you take away the glass. ie, if you took away the glass Kirk would die of radiation poisoning too; the barrier between desiring men cannot be removed on pain of death. Homosexuality, or just loving touch between two people of the same gender, is equivalent to death in this media narrative.
One of the interesting things about slash is the way it takes away the glass, then puts it back, then takes it away, then puts it back, often pleasurably. I think this is both problematic and powerful. It is problematic because it reasserts the impossibility of the touch (it fetishizes oppression in a negative manner); it is powerful - and good - because it dwells on and thinks about and removes the glass (it fetishizes oppression in a transformative manner).
One of the interesting things about mainstream media is that it continues to put the glass back up, no matter how hard we try to tear it down. Queer desiring touches have been, and remain, imaginable but impossible.
TL;DR ALTERNATE SUMMARY: THERE SEEMS TO BE SOME KIND OF INVISIBLE BARRIER IDK WHAT IT MIGHT BE
In regards to Good Omens, it's relevant that this entire conversation about homosocial relationships in media takes place within the 29 year period between the publication of Good Omens the book and the adaptation of the story to screen. The vid was created 15 years ago - which is to say 18 years after the book was published and 11 years before season 1 was released - and it talks about realised queer desire in mainstream media as being so impossible that it is equivalent to death. That is the kind of resistance that queer representation in pop culture has been up against, these last three decades.
Crowley/Aziraphale, as depicted in the book, is such a classic example of slash. I've seen some people who read the book in a contemporary context saying they didn't necessarily pick up on any subtext between the characters, and I suspect this is a mark of cultural expectations. Firstly, because the cultural references that the intentional subtext relies on have become obscured over time - see Neil Gaiman's explanation of the "consenting cycle repairmen" line. But more importantly because the audience's frame of reference for unintentional subtext has shifted, too. What is unsayable and which silences are emotionally loaded has changed over time. Even if you are intentionally using a queer lens in your reading, you might not see subtext in the same places that someone would even 10 years ago.
For example, take this passage from the book:
On the whole, neither [Aziraphale] nor Crowley would have chosen each other's company, but they were both men, or at least men-shaped creatures, of the world, and the Arrangement had worked to their advantage all this time. Besides, you grew accustomed to the only other face that had been around more or less consistently for six millennia.
On it's face, this line suggests that the relationship between the two of them is a matter of convenience more than desire. Maybe that's the intended reading and maybe that's how it started or how they justify their association to themselves, but taken together with how deeply they know each other and how they are always each other's first thought in a crisis, suddenly "neither would have chosen the other's company" sounds like an extremely British way to say they care about each other far more than they were supposed to. Plus, this is Aziraphale's take on their relationship, and it plays rather beautifully against Crowley's much simpler expression of the exact same sentiment:
Aziraphale. The Enemy, of course. But an enemy for six thousand years now, which made him a sort of friend.
To go back to Henry Jenkin's wise words, what we're seeing here is Aziraphale thinking about Crowley through the glass - through the "aspects of traditional masculinity which prevent emotional expressiveness or physical intimacy between men". If you came up in slash fandom at a time when seeing queer relationships in canon was unthinkable, you probably find it easier to identify the gap between how Aziraphale thinks about his relationship with Crowley and how their relationship actually functions. That gap was where a lot of slash lived.
You might say that the book shows Crowley and Aziraphale watching each other through the glass, and season 1 is them pressing up against it. They're still prevented from showing the full depth of feeling between them, they still hunger for more than they're allowed, but they are reaching for it. We see the history of their relationship developing through the ages. The unsayable is still left unsaid, but we feel the weight of it in everything they do. They come so very close but they still can't cross that threshold.
And then there's season 2. Within the text, Crowley and Aziraphale are not just pressing against the glass, they're actively trying to dismantle it. They're searching for a door to the other side. They're inspecting for weak points where they could cut their way through. And then suddenly they're out of time and out of options and the glass is still between them, and there's nothing they can do.
As the audience, you feel that desperation. You feel that grief. And if you're someone who's been watching the glass go back up on every relationship you thought might stand a chance of tearing it down, it hits hard. You're longing vicariously with the characters, but you're longing for yourself too, to see queer desire made possible. To see queer touch made not just imaginable but real.
And then, with all hope lost, Crowley throws himself through the glass. It doesn't matter that it doesn't save them. They kiss and it changes everything. Queer desire is no longer up for debate. Queer touch is no longer impossible. They kiss and the glass shatters, entirely and irrevocably.
This is why it matters so much that they did kiss, even though the love between them was already undeniable. For thirty years, Crowley and Aziraphale were part of a media landscape that relentlessly reinforced the glass at every turn and flooded fatal radiation through any crack they couldn't fix. In a different context, that kiss would be less vital to affirming their relationship. But in the world we live in, with the specific history that this story has, I don't think anything else could have done what it did. The glass between these characters had been reinforced over decades, in a culture that made the barriers to open intimacy between men inescapable. Their kiss was what it took to break it.
And by shattering the glass, this story has fundamentally rewritten what is possible. It proves the rules preventing true affection between people of the same gender can be defied. Queer people are already becoming more visible in pop culture; we're no longer reliant on slash reimagining queer longing between heterosexual leads. But Crowley and Aziraphale's kiss is cathartic and vindicating in an entirely different way. It turns slash into intentional queerness. It takes a fetishisation of oppression vacillating between problematic and transformative, and finally stands up on the side of powerful, empowering transformation. It confronts the barriers that once rendered this desiring touch impossible, and breaks through them once and for all.
That's what taking away the glass means. That's what Good Omens did.
Please please please I know we all love Friends and Chandler was our favourite character and Matthew always put a smile on our faces and that’s all amazing but can we please please please talk about this:
“I've had a lot of ups and downs in my life. I'm still working through it personally, but the best thing about me is that if an alcoholic or drug addict comes up to me and says, 'Will you help me?' I will always say, 'Yes, I know how to do that. I will do that for you, even if I can't always do it for myself! So I do that, whenever I can. In groups, or one on one.
And I created the Perry House in Malibu, a sober-living facility for men. I also wrote my play The End of Longing, which is a personal message to the world, an exaggerated form of me as a drunk. I had something important to say to people like me, and to people who love people like me.
When I die, I know people will talk about Friends, Friends, Friends. And I'm glad of that, happy l've done some solid work as an actor, as well as given people multiple chances to make fun of my struggles on the world wide web...
but when I die, as far as my so-called accomplishments go, it would be nice if Friends were listed far behind the things I did to try to help other people.
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