thoughts of a lonely raven

nyx, he/she/they, aroace, aspiring writer and historian I'll post here my thoughts about whatever catches my attention (aka welcome to the ramblings of a mad person)

[thoughtsofalonelyraven]

Uhhhhh, hello there? Kinda not kinda introduction post to my person, for no reason other than I thought it was funny- Soooooo, knock yourselves out, I guess.

About me

Name: Nyx

Pronouns: he/she/they ("jack of all theys, master of pronouns")

Orientation: Aromantic asexual

Hobbies: Writing, reading, gaming, drawing/painting, listening to music

My AO3 profile:

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[thoughtsofalonelyraven]

Sooooooo uh, I don't know who needs to hear this, but now that I'm finally free (for now) from my exams, I wanted to give my two cents about the whole "Destiny 2 died" thing (I apologize in advance if this post will be a little confusing, I'm still kind of elaborating what I'm feeling and how to express it).

I'm a "new light", technically speaking, I joined at the end of Lightfall, so I've been around for... I think 2 years. A friend introduced me to this game back then and I fell IN LOVE with it. The universe, the characters, heck even the gameplay was cool, and I normally hate shooter games! Needless to say I devoured a lot of lore books, even set to make a coherent wiki of them in my language (only managed to make the Witness and Rhulk's ones in the end, lol), and wrote some fanfictions and funny stories too.

Me and my friend eventually met other two people to play with, my little disaster fireteam who accompanied me for my, like, 500+ hours of game. The three of them are all veterans, so you can imagine their reaction when the announcement came. And the thing is... I felt at a crossroad. Of course I was sad, but I truly felt like I wasn't "allowed" to mourn. To be fair, clearly my own feelings were different from theirs, but, you know, they felt... wrong, in a way.

Then I thought about it – after also sharing these same feelings with my friends – and I realized that maybe I haven't been there for 10 years, I've lost god knows how much content, but I still played, I've spent HOURS and DAYS on it, read the lore, tried raid and dungeons, cried or laughed at cutscenes and dialogues. Heck, I've also made my own Guardian's lore (and my friends joined in with theirs), lore that I'm still working on and updating. So, yea, sure, I was not there day 1, but the time I spent there – that I'm still spending – means something. No matter how much some people try to say it doesn't.

So, this little post was for all of those who are in my same situation, and to them I say: we're all valid fans of the game (it's just sad that we have to reiterate that). I'm sure there have already been made similar posts, but I wanted to give my own spin on it.

Thanks to all for reading, have a little fanart of my guardian Artemis – in civilian clothes because like hell I'm drawing armor – and her ghost Hermes (please don't mind the fact that they're thinking about taking out one of the Nine, it's fine):

See you starside, Guardians.

[thoughtsofalonelyraven]

hello my bubble~ 3, 4, and 8 for the ask game, even if I dont know anything abt this i want to hear u yap :3

ADSBJYSHADBASCSAYGBCSAU I LOVE U-

FINALLY MY BABY ARTEMIS CAN GET THEIR RECOGNITION!!!! They are a... uh... they are a trustworthy hunter, me swears- ... Anyway:

3. A gunshot scar on their chest (but like... big gunshot scar, very very big); for what regards tattoos (all dedicated to important people), they have a pigeon and a phoenix on their sternum (for Saint and Osiris), two fancy books on their wrists (Ikora and Lodi), and finally a crow and a hawk behind their neck (made with, you can guess it, Crow- it was kind of a lost bet in my own lore lmao)

4. Never wondered if my beloved Artemis celebrates their resurrection day, but if they do, sure as fuck they drink until they pass out (just a normal day for a university stud- I mean, guardian)

8. Their fighting style is "fuck around and find out"- Jk jk, it's mostly going around with an Arc staff and beating the shit out of people ncsunfsdjbf-

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU SO MUCH MY FRIEND-

[lemmegettamcpictwo]

GUARDIAN OC ASK GAME

For fans of the Destiny franchise with Guardian OC's. Here's 25 prompts to throw in your friend's inbox for good luck!

1. What is their Ghost's name and shell?

2. Which subclass do they use most? Are they more inclined to use light, or the darkness?

3. Do they have any tattoos or scars? What are they, how did they get them?

4. Does they celebrate their resurrection day? If they do, how do they go about it?

5. What's their favorite weapon? Did they name it?

6. Who's their favorite NPC? How did they meet?

7. What do they do to pass the time?

8. What's their fighting style? Do they stay in the back, do they rush in immediately, etc.

9. Do they have any exotic armor? What is it?

10. Gambit Junkie or Crucible Player?

11. What was their past life like?

12. Where did their ghost find them?

13. What's their nationality?

14. What's their sexuality? Do they have a parter/any partners?

15. What are their thoughts on the Light and Darkness?

16. Who do they look up to most?

17. How would you describe their personality in three words?

18. What's their go-to comfort meal?

19. What's their sense of casual style?

20. What their role in the grand story? Is your guardian The Young Wolf, or do they play a role somewhere else? (Non-canonly, considering each player is considered the young wolf).

21. What's their favorite hobby?

22. What's something they can't do for crap?

23. Do they have an accent or any talking quirks?

24. What would their nightmare on the moon manifest as?

25. Do they have any regrets?

[taniks-the-final-shape]

Moots please for the love of the traveler please give me some of these to answer please I am on my knees

[thoughtsofalonelyraven]

ASHSJZJDJXKZUV THANK YOU FOR THE TAG @blistering-typhoons <3

1. Origin of your username:

My username was inspired by the idea of my Tumblr blog being a place where I can randomly post my ideas and stuff, and since I love crows and ravens...

2. Will always order this food:

If they're available, cinnamon rolls for sure.

3. Currently overused emoji:

🫂✨️🫵🥹

4. Favourite show, movie, book and video game:

My favorite show is definitely Midnight Mass. Sure, I've seen other series deserving of my appreciation, but this one stuck with me on the long run (love me some religious trauma).

Favourite movie... the one I make in my head. Ok, jokes' aside, I think nothing has yet beaten the LOTR trilogy in terms of sheer beauty. The only other film close to my heart as those is, unironically, Revenge of the Siths.

My favorite book (cruel question btw) is, and will always be, 20.000 Leagues Under the Sea. No matter how much time passes, no matter how many other things I read, my mind always goes back to it, in a way or another.

As for my favorite videogame (another cruel question, considering how many I've played), I'm torn between Expedition 33 and Darksiders Genesis, so I'll say both (one is there for the story, the feels, and the art, the other is there because I'm in love with the Darksiders saga and felt an incredible void in my heart after finishing it... not surprisingly, the only other one that made me feel this way is E33).

5. Songs on repeat:

Sleep Token: Take Me Back to Eden, Emergence, and Gethsemane

Yaelokre: Hearken, Kid & Leveret and Neath the grove is a heart

Aurora: The Flood, Artemis and Some Type of Skin

Extra: pretty much the entire E33 soundtrack

(can you tell I have favorite artists)

6. Last thing you hyperfixated on:

Currently hyperfixating on Dispatch. I blame the Flambert/Mechaflame artists for this and one of my friends for getting me into this.

7. Oddly specific things that bring you joy:

Not super specific, but I like seeing people happy and/or moved by things I did (be it fa fanfictions, drawings, or other personalized things).

8. Wallpaper and lockscreen:

My current wallpaper and lockscreen are literally those two art pieces by @amikoroyaiart, go check them if you like E33 (and you're a Verstave and Scielune shipper):

💬 8  🔁 326  ❤️ 1305 · Be My Valentine 🌹💝

9. Smells that make you happy:

Orange and cinnamon. Can't beat those autumn vibes!

10. Morning, night, or other time:

*Batman voice* I am the night!

... So, yeah, sunset, dusk and night for the win–

So, uh, I wouldn't know who to tag, so anyone interested can give a shot to this! Bye bye- *disappears with a bad PowerPoint effect*

[the-real-nikki19]

a writing competition i was going to participate in again this year has announced that they now allow AI generated content to be submitted

their reasoning being that "we couldn't ban it even if we wanted to, every writer already uses it anyway"

"Every writer"?

come on

[rose-of-pollux]

Reblog if you're a writer who doesn't use AI.

[thoughtsofalonelyraven]

🌻⚡ + oskar (let me see this boy's state uwu)

THANK YOU SO MUCH MY BUBBLE, THIS MEANS THE WORLD TO ME<3

🌻- What's this oc's mental health state?

It would deserve a post on its own- How to explain my little Oz...? I would say that, on the daily basis at least, he's mostly fine, but he has a wild lot of issues underneath that ohhhh boy-

Just like Morgane and Dumisani, he lost his parents (who were both Oneironauts), and differently from the other two who have at the very least some basic memories of theirs, Oskar pretty much remembers nothing of his (there are huge parallels in the ways these three handled their losses but I won't digress-)

This brought him to think that since he had been unable to save his family once (because he was way too young, literally a tiny baby), he doesn't want that to happen again; you could say he developed a martyr complex, because he would quite literally bring himself to martyrdom if it meant saving his current family (he's also the healer of the group, call it a vocation lol)

He also thinks quite low of himself, he admires a lot of people but doesn't believe he's capable of similar greatness when he actually is :(

⚡- How well does this oc sleep?

With his eyes open- 👀 Joking, joking, I PROMISE ✋️ He would 100% stay awake all night to tailor his dresses or to read the latest novel he could find, but Nas and Dumi will absolutely make sure he gets at least 6 hours of sleep; even though they sleep all together (PLATONICALLY) I give no guarantees of their success xD

[oc-factoids]

OC Ask Game!! Send an OC and an emoji!

🌸- What's this oc's favorite and least favorite color?

🌹- What's this oc's biggest fear

🌷- How does this oc take their coffee?

🌻- What's this oc's mental health state?

🌼- What's your favorite thing about this oc?

🌺- Which family member(if any) is this oc closest to?

💐- Where is this oc's favorite place to relax?

🌱- Does this oc have any pets? Do they have any pets they want?

🌲- What is this oc's greatest strength and weakness?

🌵- How does this oc feel about physical affection?

🌴- Who is this oc's favorite person?(Can be another oc, a fictional character, a celebrity, anyone)

☘- Does this oc have any piercings? Do they want any?

🍁- What's this oc's favorite genre of movies/tv shows/books/etc?

🌾- How does this oc get along with people they just met?

🍀- Around when does this oc get up in the morning?

🍂- What music does this oc like?

🌳- Does this oc collect anything?

☀️- Does this oc make good or bad first impressions?

🌙- Does this oc have any unusual hobbies?

🌟- Is this oc good at expressing themself through words or do they have to use other means?

🌈- What does this oc like and dislike about themselves?

❄- What is this oc's favorite and least favorite food?

☁️- What is this oc's clothing style like?

⚡- How well does this oc sleep?

💧- What is this oc most passionate about?

🍃- Describe this oc in one word

[blistering-typhoons]

i have no title for this but please enjoy a little oneshot of my ocs, whooo, yeaaahh, please be niceys sksjsk

He realizes about halfway down the main road that today might not be ideal for his plans. The wheels of the carriage roll sluggishly through the rain muddied ground, jostling it's lone occupant.

Sir Wolfgrim Magnus sits inside, gripping the torn cushions with sharp, agitated fingers- glaring at the outside world and especially the glorious morning sun.

Hundreds of people line the road, snaking all the way down to the towering castle rising above the quaint, brown houses. They stare openly into the spidery carriage with a combination of disgust and amusement, muttering among themselves as they shuffle ever forward.

Wolfgrim sneers at them for good measure, even as his body shrinks back into the shadows. He slaps a hand up to his chest, feeling the papers rustle inside his coat. A cruel smirk blooms upon his lips, and he smoothes down his mustache to regain some dignity.

Today is the day that he ruins the King.

A particularly violent smack of the wheel against a rock sends him almost tumbling to the front and he barks out a filthy curse, kicking out a foot to prevent his face from smashing into the seat opposite.

He rights himself with a growl, mood darkening further as he hears the drivers cackle inconspicuously.

Today, Wednesday, is public court. Usually he tries to schedule his audience with the King in a more private setting (not that an audience with His Majesty is ever truly exclusive) but his timing had run a bit askew this go around. He would wait another day, but the contents of the papers tucked into his breast are far too potent to be spared any patience upon.

So unfortunately, he will have to make do with a crowd. All the better, he muses as he gingerly smoothes out his coat. It'll fast track the gossip.

It's easy enough when he clambers out of the carriage some minutes later, only barely managing not to slip on the slickened ground, to make his way through the crowd. His height lends him the advantage to plot a path through the sea of people, and his status lends him the power to cut it.

He oils his way through the gathering pooled by the great oak doors leading into the castle proper, shying away from touching anybody too much. The combined stench of firesmoke and people assault his nose and he coughs indelicately.

Torches flicker and spark along the columns holding up the ornate ceiling, and another gathering of subjects stretch into the light.

Wolfgrim can see the distant figure of his King and he puffs up his chest. Time for action.

"Your Majesty!", he booms, thrilling as his voice soars over and smothers the din.

Dozens of eyes swivel around to stare at him as the voices sputter out and die. He rakes a confident hand through his hair, before sliding the papers out of his coat.

"I apologize for the interruption, Your Grace.", he begins, advancing to the front of the crowd, uncaring for the whispers floating around his head. "But I have a somewhat... delicate matter here which begs your immediate attention."

He feels the familiar cloak of hatred settle around him as he stalks along the great hall, loathing bubbling merrily away in the crucible of his chest. He snaps the heels of his shoes against the tile with every step, and keeps his eyes locked on target.

King Francis Godfrey II, greatest of his name. If it wouldn't ruin the energy he's bringing to the proceedings, Wolfgrim would spit.

His King is sat upon his throne (likely thing for him to be doing), vast body favouring the right side as he placidly watches Wolfgrim's approach. His Majesty wears a benevolent smirk, tucked under the great flap of his golden mustache, grey eyes crinkled at the edges. A massive hand rests gently upon the arm of his throne, and it flexes softly so show off the glint of his rings.

Wolfgrim only falters slightly in his step, but that's because he's too filled with loathing. And hatred.

He clears his throat once he's come within the King's sight, throwing an imperious little glance at a positively seething Lady Bartholomea, and opens his mouth.

But it is not his voice which fills the room, for the King speaks before him.

"Wolfgrim.", King Godfrey intones, almost slyly.

"What.", Wolfgrim snaps, somewhat flustered at the interruption, and a murmur rushes through the crowd.

The King does not answer with words, instead raising his hand and swirling his index finger in a sort of circular motion. Wolfgrim starts slightly at the sight of it, stomach dipping unpleasantly.

"Sire-?", he inquires, now thrown entirely out of his depth.

"Back to the line, Sir Wolfgrim. I'm afraid I cannot make exceptions, even for you."

"But- but sire-!"

The King holds up a palm and looks pointedly at him. Wolfgrim bristles viciously, casting a furious glance about the hall.

Damn the man to hell.

"Of course, Your Majesty. Your Majesty is the very soul of equity, I apologize for my thoughtlessness.", he hisses out, before bowing and turning on his heel.

It is lucky for Sir Wolfgrim that his King does not have the deplorable manner to subjugate him in the middle of court, but he sort of wishes His Majesty would just get it out of the way at this point. Shuffling to the back of the line he can feel indignation bloom its crimson mark upon his neck, and he doesn't know what's heavier- the stares of the peasants or the hot weight of his King's gaze on his back.

The bastard is probably still smiling.

No matter, he thinks to himself as he wedges in at the very back, unmooring a young couple who shoot him poisonous looks.

After all, how long will this actually take?

-

"Your Majesty must permit me an observation."

King Francis Godfrey II, greatest of his name, snorts inelegantly into his periodical.

"I have never, nor will ever, permit you anything, dear girl- I don't need to.", he snickers good-naturedly, bringing his tea up to sipping height.

Lady Bartholomea tips her head to the side to fix him with a stony glare, nimble fingers ceasing their embroidery work for a fleeting moment.

"It is the principal, Your Grace.", she says primly, coldly.

Godfrey's always felt decidely chilly in her presence, which is certainly welcome for a man of his size and general hot blooded nature. She is the perpetual frost to his forge, and he loves her dearly for it.

The sort of woman who secures the position of royal advisor and then does nothing particularly ambitious with the role. Godfrey likes to think it's because of her lifelong affection for him, but has the dreadful suspicion that it's because pulling off a coup would be too impolite for her tastes.

"Alright, I'll bite. What have I done?", he surrenders with only a hint of trepidation.

She deliberates for a second, her vicious tongue tucked firmly behind flattened lips as she take up her craft once more.

He chances that sip of tea, bracing himself.

"It is what you haven't done.", she finally settles on, her immaculately plucked eyebrow twitching for just a second.

Godfrey frowns.

"I thought we were rather on schedule."

"You were. I'm not talking about that."

A slight pause, broken only by the murmuring of the castle around them. Godfrey squints, and opens his mouth.

"Alright, then-"

"That infernal knight, Your Majesty."

"Ah."

"I should wonder why you've not stripped him off his title and thrown him to the mercy of the wilderness. I mean, the ruckus today alone! I can excuse his appearance here any other day- Your Majesty may permit who he likes- but barging into public court was too far!", Lady Bartholomea cries, voice sharpening with every exclamation as her needle stabs recklessly into the cloth. "And to accuse you of- of-! Well, you heard him."

Godfrey huffs, not unkindly, even as his teeth sink softly into the meat of his cheek.

Ah, Sir Wolfgrim. Godfrey rubs a hand over his mouth to scrub away at his smile.

He admits, it was something of a shock to have the normally reticient, shadowbound knight barge into a crowd to shout thinly veiled abuses at him. And yes, perhaps it did bring down the overall mood he was trying to inject for the morning- but Wolfgrim has that effect. Or at least he has whenever Godfrey's permitted audience with him.

The man has the uncanny ability to suck all the warmth from the room and convert it into something bitter and malicious, warping it to suit the forked edge of his silvery tongue. Even the way he addresses his King is thick and dripping with contempt, every line of his sharp, square shoulders drawn up in pride and disgust as he embarrasses himself on another ridiculous little scheme.

Its enough to drive a fellow mad.

Godfrey only just restrains a contented little growl in his chest. He's been told the noise is rather frightening.

"One might argue that public court is public for a reason.", Godfrey remembers to answer, shifting discreetly in his seat.

If Lady Bartholomea's gaze was stony before it's positively petrified now, a shard of glass pointed directly at him.

He takes another sip. Innocently.

"Why do you insist on keeping him about, sire. Nobody likes him."

"I like him!", Godfrey exclaims, setting his teacup down.

"Yes, but it's not about you!", Lady Bartholomea cries, exasperated, and Godfrey sighs.

"I know that, my dear, but permit me if you will, this one amusement. I promise I shall set him down very sternly and ensure he does not darken any public event ever again, if today's humiliation has not already succeeded in doing so.", he soothes, laying down his periodical to gaze deeply into her eyes.

She sags a little, a ghost of a smile tugging at her mouth.

"You were very masterful this morning, I will give you that. I was very proud."

"Thank you, darling, that's all I ever want to hear from you."

"Mhm. But trust, sire, that if he kicks up another scandal, I will deal with him in my own capacity.", Lady Bartholomea sniffs, relaxing back into her chair.

Godfrey smiles tightly and nods, nausea and admiration fighting for their rights in his breast. Damn his judgement to become so very fond of possibly the two most ferocious people in the kingdom.

"I trust.", he concedes. "Can you squeeze out an hour for me to meet him?"

"Naturally. Shall I send him a warning of your arrival?"

Godfrey barks out a decidely unkingly laugh and sees her shrink back in the corner of his eye, unimpressed.

"No, no, not needed. I'm sure he knows I'm coming."

It's a lie, of course, he's never known Sir Wolfgrim to be aware of the great hand of consequence bearing down upon him before it's too late, but Godfrey is not going to pass up the opportunity to see the look on the man's face.

For the good of the kingdom.

-

Meanwhile, uttterly defeated and more than a little worse for wear, Sir Wolfgrim throws himself into his chambers. He makes a brief pass by the fireplace to cast the papers into the roaring flames, vowing to track down the bastard who'd sold them to him in the first place.

Embarrassment oozes along his skin and he practically sways under the potency of his anger. He should have known they weren't legitimate, he'd not exactly acquired them in any reputable place.

He breathes unevenly, pushing off the hearth to fling himself into his armchair. He sinks into the faded cushions, pauses for just a moment, before deflating fully with an almighty groan.

It rattles in his throat and almost graduates to a scream.

He opens his eyes with a start, and reaches for the sidetable, where a bottle of wine sits faithfully. He grimaces.

He despises wine.

It's only when he's halfway down the bottle that he relaxes his shoulders, pushing out a deep exhale. His stomach is swimming with nausea and something else he'll eject come bedtime. The beginning of a headache is throbbing in the back of his skull.

Business as usual. He'll get them next time.

[thoughtsofalonelyraven]

Me in a Destiny fanfiction that I have abandoned since a while:

Eramis in Revenant Act 2 (couldn't snap a pic):

"You are Eido, daughter of Misraaks. You bear the namesake of one of the strongest Awoken heroes ever known. Earn it."

Bro... Is Eramis sneak peeking my fics? Like- They have the same fucking vibes-

I'VE STARTED WRITING THIS IN AUGUST-

ERAMIS GET OUT OF MY WRITING APP-

[bloggingboutburgers]

Wouldn't be doing ace week right if I didn't mention at least once how much we can't win

[thoughtsofalonelyraven]

trick or treat my beloved bubble :3💚✨

I WAS ABOUT TO ASK YOU, YOU HEATHEN-

Anyway, I'll do, uh, sneak peek of a WIP xD

Ofc is a Batman Rogues fic, because I'm not able to write anything else lately lmao

[thoughtsofalonelyraven]

I have some original projects stored in my computer, and, apart from moments of love/hate towards them, I sometime dream of publishing them.

... And then I think about how some people could horribly twist everything or start making up stuff just because they hate me, thus ruin everything and transform a dream into a nightmare. And that's when I just freeze in place, conflicted about what I should do with them in the future.

I shouldn't be this scared of just sharing something on the internet. No one should. But I've seen how people (fans and haters alike) behave when it comes to new stuff, and I really don't like it.

[a-sweeter-solarsystem]

btw if folks are so deadset on the mindset that destiny is a "dead game" (it very much is not as much as the world keeps trying to make it so) now's as good a time as ever to support fan artists/fan projects that help keep the story/setting alive.

Like, this isn't me trying to self promote or anything like that there are so many unique worlds and creations and stories that people have come up with over the years that are just as, if not better than some of the stories in game. Not to mention that destiny's universe is dense as fuck and there are pleanty of little rabbit holes to go digging around in.

worried that bungie is not gonna be making more story content after the episodes? You have access to the internet, make your own stories! Upset that a mystery is never gonna conclude? Draw your own conclusions and turn that into a fun lil side project! Sad you'll never see a certain character appear? Write those fuckers in yourself!! who's gonna stop you???

Also by showing how much you care for the world you're in turn showing the many talented artists behind its creation that they did a wonderful job and you wanna continue to be a part of it!!

consuming and forgetting is the true way of letting something die. If you want something to keep living you gotta keep adding to the story soup

[disclaimer-performatico]

tagged by @edandstede to do this picrew 🐈 Thank you this was loads of fun

(and I will someday finally do the other thing you tagged me on, know that I live in shame)

Obviously I had to pick the little detective moustache and the autumn leaves.

I am tagging y'all but don't feel obligated:

@satturn @sygneth @punk-academian-witch @siobhanromee @i-am-an-atomic-bomb @sharpartisan @famdommcfanface

[sygneth]

yayyy thank you for the tag this is such a sweet picrew :3

Of course I picked a monocle and lilac flowers hehee

Tagging @amrehmar @uygfiug @r2y9s-notartblog @blistering-typhoons @keioroni no pressure of course

[blistering-typhoons]

thank you so much for the tag! this is such an adorable picrew, oh my god 🥺✨

tagging @eldritchpuddle @thoughtsofalonelyraven <3

[thoughtsofalonelyraven]

Thank you for tagging me <3 I also tag @eldritchpuddle so they shall feel the pressure of doing this xD (/affectionate)

[thoughtsofalonelyraven]

Another possible idea because honestly yes-

I'd love to see two friends "flirting" with each other, and that's kinda it. No further feelings, no "oh god I actually love them", just idiots being idiots (even better if they're in the ace spectrum or like a gay/lesbian friendship, top tier) and playing around with each other

Further bonus points if everyone thinks they're like fiancées or something, and they're just confused af

[thoughtsofalonelyraven]

an introverted, kinda shady person in an equally shady business or situation that stopped caring for the world long ago, except for their younger loyal sibling, who would follow them to hell and back (and the older would do the same)

bonus points if the older at some point realises that by keeping their sibling into that shady business they're preventing them to be completely happy, so encourages them to go away even if that hurts them, because it hurts them more to know they're the reason their sibling is stuck there undeservingly