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we're not kids anymore.
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todays bird
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@timelordvictoiouspartyof1
it’s actually so embarassing that marvel wrote steve n bucky with almost EXCLUSIVELY romantic coded tropes (amnesia + memory being brought back by one true love, damsel in distress, no! not without you!, their catchphrase literally meaning “til death do you part”) just for them to be mad at US for being like “lol what if they kissed” like damn bro chill
5 simple exercises to awaken dormant muscles
{source}
I appreciate this video a lot--people don't realize how important it is to start slow if you're trying to come back from a completely sedentary lifestyle, and they get really hurt as a result. Straining your muscles too much, too suddenly can land you in the E.R. and the wrong joint injury can permanently affect your mobility, so please start with absolute basics and easy stretches!
Society acts like women not being pretty or being fat is a moral failing on their part.
SELKIE Petite Danseuse Collection 2025 if you want to support this blog consider donating to: ko-fi.com/fashionrunways
Larry Tesler, inventor of the cut, copy, and paste commands, dies at 74
Larry Tesler, inventor of the cut, copy, and paste commands, dies at 74
It's so nice being on tumblr because you don't even have to make your own post but people would still follow you anyways if you're good at rebloging posts they like
Tumblr Holidays:
• March 14th: Pi Day
• March 15th: Ides of March
• April 1st: April Fools Day and Mishapocalypse Memorial Day
• April 13th: Homestuck Day
• April 20th: Weed Day
• September 8th: Queen Elizabeth Killed By Sans Undertale Day
• November 5th: Destiel Canon Day
DEAN SAYING THAT HE FEELS OKAY AND GOING TO HIS ROOM TO REST AND CAS BEING HAPPY CUTTING TO SAM WITH TEARS IN HIS FUCKING EYES TELLING CAS THAT DEANS IN TROUBLE IS SO GOOD. THAT'S SO GOOD. They better address this shit next episode or I'm afraid I'm going to have to kill the writers.
The statute of limitations for a crime like this is 10 years. Unfortunately, the 10 years passed on February 17 of this year. It’s too late to punish the writers. 
okay i just realized they meant "fascist" and not atleast 2 other words i can think of that are funnier
The faggots dont claim him
The faggots dont claim him
The faggots dont claim him
The council has spoken. Send him to the gayless wastes.
We fucks don’t claim him either
The guy in the sleeping bag wiggling around
I’m weeping
The two people in the front wearing one shirt.
Are we really not going to talk about the guy in the back who is attached to another guy’s back while spinning?
WHAT ABOUT THE GUY THAT FALLS OUT OF THE WINDOW
WHY IS IT BACK
no you guys don’t understand, not only is this the first harlem shake out there… these guys aren’t normal military. This is “Telemarkbataljonen”. They’re pretty much the Norwegian equivalent of the fucking black ops. My brother knows a guy in this battalion, and when asked what they do there, he looked my brother dead in the eye and said “That is strictly confidential”. These guys are hard as shit, which makes this even more hilarious
hey does everyone remember the fucking harlem shake. this was goddamn inescapable in 2013
iconic
HEY GUYS YOU’LL NEVER GUESS WHAT I FOUND
What would your Blorbo do if they walked down the stairs of their own house in the middle of the night to get some water and saw Santa in their living room?
They would be giddy and happy (OMG Santa’s here!)
They would ask Santa what their Christmas present was
They would test Santa by asking questions to see if he was a real Santa
They would call 9-1-1 on “Santa” for breaking and entering
They would start screaming
They’d run back up the stairs to their room n lock the door. That’s an intruder
They’d fight Santa; they believed he wasn’t a real Santa but a thief/an intruder
They’d tell Santa/thief/intruder to leave or else they’d call the cops
They would ignore him
They would ask Santa if he wanted a beer
Something else (feel free to elaborate)
This poll was submitted to us. If you’d like to send us your own scenario (plus different ways a character might react to said scenario) so we could make a poll for you, feel free to send them to our inbox.
Hold him at gun point and give Santa a chance to convince him he was real
when e.e. cummings said “i’ll live my life if it kills me”
when andrea gibson said “i suppose i love this life, in spite of my clenched fist.” & when ellen bass said “to love life, to love it even when you have no stomach for it”
when james baldwin said, “this is why one must say yes to life and embrace it wherever it is found-and it is found in terrible places; nevertheless, there it is;”
when Mary Oliver said “it is a serious thing / just to be alive / on this fresh morning / in this broken world”
Tell me more about NASA's scientific accuracy ratings for movies.
For those who are curious...
The Worst:
1) 2012 (2009): Neutrinos from a solar flare heat up the Earth's core, setting off the end of life as we know it. The plot conveniently ignores the fact that neutrinos pass straight through matter—even us—without doing much of anything.
2) The Core (2003): The Earth's core has stopped rotating and scientists have to drill into it to start it back up. The moviemakers go nuts with basic geology, ending up with something the New York Times called “monumentally dumb.”
3) Armageddon (1998): A team of drillers is sent to an asteroid on its way to strike Earth to split it into two parts they say will fly safely past the planet, completely ignoring Newton's First Law of Motion ("an object will remain at rest or in uniform motion in a straight line unless acted upon by an external force"), which says that all they did was make two asteroids that would hit the Earth.
4) Volcano (1997): Los Angeles is destroyed by a volcano that springs up in the city. Bad science mingling with cheesy dialogue and effects.
5) Chain Reaction (1996): Keanu Reeves. Bubble fusion. A government plot to prevent the spread of the technology. The perfect recipe for bad.
6) The 6th Day (2000): Arnold Schwarzenegger is cloned. Because one of him just wasn't enough?
7) What the #$*! Do We Know? (2004): Read the synopsis on Wikipedia. It'll make your head hurt.
And the Best:
1) Gattaca (1997)
2) Contact (1997)
3) Metropolis (1927)
4) The Day the Earth Stood Still (1951)
5) Woman in the Moon (1929)
6) The Thing From Another World (1951)
7) Jurassic Park (1993)
The space agency lists their favorite flicks
Why are the best ones good,though?
HERE’S THE THING THOUGH
I used to work for a call center and I was doing a political survey and I called this number that was randomly generated for me and the way our system worked was voice-activated so when the other person said hello you’d get connected to them, so I just launch right into my “Harvard University and NPR blah blah blah” thing and then there’s this long pause and I think the person’s hung up even though I didn’t hear a click
And then I hear “you shouldn’t be able to call this number.”
So I apologize and go into the preset spiel about because we aren’t selling anything, etc. etc. and the answer I get is
“No, I know that. What I mean is that it should be impossible for you to call this number, and I need to know how you got it.”
I explain that it’s randomly generated and I’m very sorry for bothering him, and go to hang up. And before I can click terminate, I hear:
“Ma’am, this is a matter of national security.”
I accidentally called the director of the FBI.
My job got investigated because a computer randomly spit out a number to the Pentagon.
This is my new favourite story.
When I was in college I got a job working for a company that manages major air-travel data. It was a temp gig working their out of date system while they moved over to a new one, since my knowing MS Dos apparently made me qualified.
There was no MS Dos involved. Instead, there was a proprietary type-based OS and an actually-uses-transistors refrigerator-sized computer with switches I had to trip at certain times during the night as I watched the data flow from six pm to six AM on Fridays and weekends. If things got stuck, I reset the server.
The company handled everything from low-end data (hotel and car reservations) to flight plans and tower information. I was weighed every time I came in to make sure it was me. Areas of the building had retina scanners on doors.
During training. they took us through all the procedures. Including the procedures for the red phone. There was, literally, a red phone on the shelf above my desk. “This is a holdover from the cold war.” They said. “It isn’t going to come up, but here’s the deal. In case of nuclear war or other nation-wide disaster, the phone will ring. Pick up the phone, state your name and station, and await instructions. Do whatever you are told.”
So my third night there, it’s around 2am and there’s a ringing sound.
I look up, slowly. The Red phone is ringing.
So I reach out, I pick up the phone. I give my name and station number. And I hear every station head in the building do the exact same. One after another, voices giving names and numbers. Then silence for the space of two breaths. Silence broken by…
“Uh… Is Shantavia there?”
It turns out that every toll free, 1-900 or priority number has a corresponding local number that it routs to at its actual destination. Some poor teenage girl was trying to dial a friend of hers, mixed up the numbers, and got the atomic attack alert line for a major air-travel corporation’s command center in the mid-west United States.
There’s another pause, and the guys over in the main data room are cracking up. The overnight site head is saying “I think you have the wrong number, ma’am.” and I’m standing there having faced the specter of nuclear annihilation before I was old enough to legally drink.
The red phone never rang again while I was there, so the people doing my training were only slightly wrong in their estimation of how often the doomsday phone would ring.
Every time I try to find this story, I end up having to search google with a variety of terms that I’m sure have gotten me flagged by some watchlist, so I’m reblogging it again where I swear I’ve reblogged it before.
But none of these stories even come close to the best one of them all; a wrong number is how the NORAD Santa Tracker got started.
Seriously, this is legit.
In December 1955, Sears decided to run a Santa hotline. Here’s the ad they posted.
Only problem is, they misprinted the number. And the number they printed? It went straight through to fucking NORAD. This was in the middle of the Cold War, when early warning radar was the only thing keeping nuclear annihilation at bay. NORAD was the front line.
And it wasn’t just any number at NORAD. Oh no no no.
Terri remembers her dad had two phones on his desk, including a red one. “Only a four-star general at the Pentagon and my dad had the number,” she says.
“This was the ‘50s, this was the Cold War, and he would have been the first one to know if there was an attack on the United States,” Rick says.
The red phone rang one day in December 1955, and Shoup answered it, Pam says. “And then there was a small voice that just asked, ‘Is this Santa Claus?’ ”
His children remember Shoup as straight-laced and disciplined, and he was annoyed and upset by the call and thought it was a joke — but then, Terri says, the little voice started crying.
“And Dad realized that it wasn’t a joke,” her sister says. “So he talked to him, ho-ho-ho’d and asked if he had been a good boy and, ‘May I talk to your mother?’ And the mother got on and said, ‘You haven’t seen the paper yet? There’s a phone number to call Santa. It’s in the Sears ad.’ Dad looked it up, and there it was, his red phone number. And they had children calling one after another, so he put a couple of airmen on the phones to act like Santa Claus.”
“It got to be a big joke at the command center. You know, ‘The old man’s really flipped his lid this time. We’re answering Santa calls,’ ” Terri says.
And then, it got better.
“The airmen had this big glass board with the United States on it and Canada, and when airplanes would come in they would track them,” Pam says.
“And Christmas Eve of 1955, when Dad walked in, there was a drawing of a sleigh with eight reindeer coming over the North Pole,” Rick says.
“Dad said, ‘What is that?’ They say, ‘Colonel, we’re sorry. We were just making a joke. Do you want us to take that down?’ Dad looked at it for a while, and next thing you know, Dad had called the radio station and had said, ‘This is the commander at the Combat Alert Center, and we have an unidentified flying object. Why, it looks like a sleigh.’ Well, the radio stations would call him like every hour and say, ‘Where’s Santa now?’ ” Terri says.
For real.
“And later in life he got letters from all over the world, people saying, ‘Thank you, Colonel,’ for having, you know, this sense of humor. And in his 90s, he would carry those letters around with him in a briefcase that had a lock on it like it was top-secret information,” she says. “You know, he was an important guy, but this is the thing he’s known for.”
“Yeah,” Rick [his son] says, “it’s probably the thing he was proudest of, too.”
So yeah. I think that might be the best wrong number of all time.
Source: http://www.npr.org/2014/12/19/371647099/norads-santa-tracker-began-with-a-typo-and-a-good-sport
No okay THAT is adorable and I’m queueing this for next December.
I always reply with “well, that’s not what I heard but I wasn’t there”
