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Your friendly neighborhood divemaster

[toastbutteregg]

[nicostiel]

#glad to see staff doing their part

[swoopyswish]

“celebrities queerbait" factoid actualy just statistical error. average celebrity cannot queerbait as it is a media analysis concept. Misha Collins, who lives in cave & maintained a legitimate queerbait for 3 entire days, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

[funnytwittertweets]

[were--ralph]

Pour one out folks, i think this might be the end

[funnytwittertweets]

[paper-mario-wiki]

scrolling twitter today and then coming over here is like walking out of a burning building and then walking into the calm remains of a building that burnt down 5 years ago and has been reclaimed by nature.

[nyamafriend]

nothing weve posted are even firecrackers compared to this fucking atomic bomb of a post

[toastbutteregg]

[tippenfunkaport]

there is something so darkly comical about tumblr potentially outliving twitter

tumblr, which is held together with duct tape and madness, run by three raccoons in blood stained Yahoo! hats and a handful of crabs, its only discernible source of income the sale of shoelaces from an inside joke so inside no one knows the original source anymore and fake blue checkmarks... that website still lives on

truly the cockroach of social media and I love it for that

[sebdoesnothing]

She saw her moment and got glossed up for it

[bus-noises]

This is genuinely hilarious to me

[tooquirkytolose]

Ok actually genuine tip for new tumblr users: if you see a post you like and want to reblog but theres a bad/annoying added on bit in the reblog chain feel free to just reblog that post straight from op or the last person who knew how to mind their business

[thedepressionoftrees]

Or just mock the edition. That usually works

[mitzo]

oR jUsT mOcK tHE eDiTiON. tHaT uSuAlLy WoRkS

[thedepressionoftrees]

[just-mushroom-thoughts]

Ok , I'm considering joining the skeleton war 2022 but, I am undecided on sides, so wizards, skeletons, convince me

[chipper-skeleton]

WE ARE UNION BASED AND WE PROVIDE FULLY PAID MEDICAL AND DENTAL INSURANCE

[just-mushroom-thoughts]

I'm literally a mushroom I don't have teeth

[chipper-skeleton]

DO YOU WANT SOME

THIS IS NOT SARCASM I AM GENUINELY OFFERING A CHANCE FOR YOU TO OBTAIN TEETH

[just-mushroom-thoughts]

I except teeth

[chipper-skeleton]

[orcposts]

[guccixcucci]

I can't stop watching this omg 🥺💞💞💞

[maculategiraffe]

voiceover, quietly, in a New Zealand accent: When I was taking this little guy's photos, I noticed that he was having difficulties getting into the poses and wasn't feeling a hundred percent comfortable. So I scooped him up, un-swaddled him, and gave him a little back massage. Because I knew that he had had a little bit of a hard birth, little bit of a hard entry into the world, and quite often things like a C-section, forceps, or a tight birth canal can often result in a pulled muscle or a knot in their back, shoulders, or neck. And look at that, when I hit the spot, he lets me know, with [voice goes up an octave] a beautiful big SMI-YILE!!! Isn't it gorgeous!! [normal voice] And he was totally comfortable after that.

[fantastic-mister-bugbug]

[gravedangerahead]

We stan

[crazy-pages]

I love all the possible implications from: “Mama is trans and wasn’t out back then”, “Mama successfully committed feminist voter fraud”, to “Mama just fucking voted and the people running her local ballot box knew what was fucking good for them and stayed out of her way”.