for his mourners will be outcast men

Trek. 32/GQ. Floridian. American Balkanization Party founder. Likes weird porn and being painstakingly honest. Tumblr anthropologist. Frank Wildhorn stan.

[semitruck-e]

{ she's five apples tall and means the world to me }

[snakebites-and-ink]

Former living weapon absolutely dominating at laser tag

[adonischildsupportcase]

[balaclava-trismegistus]

Pasadena police "horseplay" accident

[gunsandfireandshit]

Rules of gun safety:

1. Have fun and be yourself

2. Pointing loaded guns at your friends is always funny

3. Trigger discipline is overrated

[changelingsrule]

Where I live, if a cop so much as removes a gun from their holster they are punished. Even if its necessary. The laws are made to reduce police brutality. Something like this is so stupid.

[balaclava-trismegistus]

Damn you should change your laws so it's easier for them to shoot each other

[homunculus-argument]

"I learned a lot from making this" is artist talk for "making this sucked ass and I'm not entirely happy with the result."

[animelionessmika]

^what artistic growth feels like

[memeuplift]

[teaboot]

Nah man that's a northern bobwhite

[robinparravel]

I love Bruce

[molabuddy]

[angstandhappiness]

LMAO 😂

[evilscientist3]

i swear if the wizard doesnt let me out of his abandoned salt mine soon im gonna fucking LOSE IT

[ttechniic]

what did you do to be put into the salt mine

[evilscientist3]

i MAY have eaten his special wizard meal. but i think he should let me out tbh

[ttechniic]

was it good? was it worth it? are you able to bear the weight of your sin?

[evilscientist3]

im not gonna lie it was fucking delicious i would fucking do it again. wait shit youre the fucking wizard in disguise seeing if ive learned my lesson arent you. fuck.

[ttechniic]

10 YEARS IN THE ABANDONED SALT MINE.

[siderealglimmer]

[swagophile]

if i was marquis de sade i would just write 1 day of sodom because 100 just feels like too many.

[anneriawings]

OKAY CAN SOMEBODY EXPLAIN TO ME HOW THE FUCK YOU SHIP A PACKAGE OF COOKIES TO A FRIEND WHO LIVES IN NEW JERSEY, ONLY TO HAVE IT NOT GET THERE ON TIME BECAUSE IT SOMEHOW ENDED UP IN GUAM?

I JUST

GUAM?

[phantomrose96]

IM CRYING REAL TEARS MAH DUDES THE COOKIES ARE IN GUAM

KATIE TRIED TO SEND US COOKIES OUTTA THE GOODNESS OF HER HEART AND JUST

“OHHHH THESE COOKIES WERE SUPPOSED TO GO TO NEW JERSEY, PHIL? I THOUGHT YOU SAID

[anneriawings]

12/27, 8:37PM CT

ITS STILL IN FUCKING GUAM

[anneriawings]

12/28, 12:18PM CT

THE COOKIES ARE IN HONOLULU GUYS THEY ***FINALLY LEFT GUAM***

[anneriawings]

12/28, 10:22PM CT

THE COOKIES ARE FINALLY ON THEIR WAY TO NEW JERSEY

GO COOKIES GO

@phantomrose96 @cupcakecreeper​ @homebeccer GET READY

[anneriawings]

lol i was looking through my history to find the tracking number page and

[anneriawings]

12/30, 12:39AM CT

@phantomrose96 @homebeccer @cupcakecreeper

holy fuCK HOLY FUCK HOLY FUCK GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS

THE COOKIES ARE ALMOST THERE

[phantomrose96]

The saga of Katie’s Guam cookies is my Anime of the Season

[anneriawings]

THEY’VE ARRIIIIIIIIIIVVEEDDDDD THEY’RE ON THE FRONT DOORSTEP

[anneriawings]

COOKIES ACQUIRED

[homebeccer]

THE THRILLING CONCLUSION

also as a bonus visual here’s a rough approximation of these cookies’ journey

[anneriawings]

how the FUCK did this blow up and get so many notes

[anneriawings]

SO FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES, @homebeccer @phantomrose96 @cupcakecreeper AND I WANTED TO KNOW HOW MUCH IT WOULD ACTUALLY COST THE U.S. GOVERNMENT TO INTENTIONALLY SEND THESE COOKIES FROM TEXAS TO GUAM TO NEW JERSEY AND???????????????

AND 

IT’S

IT’S

IT’S NOT AN OPTION IT’S NOT AN OPTION I CAN’T I-

I COULDN’T EVEN HAVE SENT THESE COOKIES TO GUAM EVEN IF I’D HAVE TRIED 

[phantomrose96]

Cant believe we uncovered the Guam Cookie glitch folks

Its not even an in-game feature

[crowreys-wormstache]

Oh my god it’s back

[anneriawings]

H O W

[anavar-immela]

I’ve had this sort of thing happen.

At least it explained why the package took so long to get here.

[phantomrose96]

I appreciate that they have an Entire Stamp for “Missent to Nepal”

No one said “hey let’s stop missending things to Nepal” they just said “let’s make a stamp for this” and called it a day.

I’m gonna get Missent to Guam tattooed on my arm in commemoration. 

[terrainterrain-pullup]

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

[offonaherosjourney]

Get Moist von Lipwig in charge of the US postal service ASAP

[korasonata]

Ok I know this is super old now but I work at a post office and I was curious about the price so I did some digging and I still don’t have a definite answer because THE REASON it says “no shipping services available” is because all shipping services were actually suspended to Guam at the time. As in no packages, parcels, letters, or mail or any kind could be sent to Guam. So not only is it mind boggling that it got sent so far in the wrong direction of its intended destination, but because nothing should have been able to get in to Guam period.

You QUITE LITERALLY could not have sent these cookies to Guam if you tried.

[deirdreskye]

oh goodie I got transported into a Mormon yuri. I'm a first year transfer student to the Nephi Halicarnassus Girls' Academy I'm running late to reformed Egyptian class with toast in my mouth! Oh fuck I bumped into the class president in the hall and now I'm flashing my temple garments as I comedically fall over...... Omg the class president is sharing a dirty soda from Swig with me..... From the same straw, an indirect kiss.... "Baka, you got Crumbl on your face," she says wiping the cookie from my cheek with her finger........

[complexkomainu]

ALWAYS REMEMBER: THE NIGHT IS DARKEST JUST BEOFRE IT KEEPS GOING FOREVER

[flipchild]

[rappersdoingnormalshit-blog]

[st3fan00]

Why Wayne got socks in the jacuzzi

[whitegirlsaintshit]

those are his hooves you bitch

[professionalchaoticdumbass]

happy 10 years of those are his hooves you bitch

[whitegirlsaintshit]

why the FUCK am i still on here

[kuropin]

Dont lock me up for this one

[ducksdontdraw]

Wistful painting for sale. Very real, not fake. No refunds.

[decepticonsensual]

Not to be all "the children have forgotten the sacred texts!" but I just saw someone refer to a ship between two people who are good friends in canon as a crackship.

Hon. No. Crackship doesn't just mean "not canon". It's difficult to imagine two people who spend significant canon time together as a crackship. Crackship is when you write Galactus getting fucked by Tony the Tiger.

[decepticonsensual]

Gotta say, my absolute favourite notes on this so far have been the number of people congratulating Tony on his rebound from the Grinch.

[onebadnoodle]

i miss them 🐛 🐟