Traitorous Elven Mage

Just a vampire sympathiser

[mylittleswan]

From the vault. Excuse the old watermark.

[catb-fics]

Don’t Delete the Kisses // Wolf Alice Glastonbury 2021

[thirstyforbettertwilight]

I hate it when people trashtalk Twilight and they clearly don't know anything about what they're saying. Learn the lore and THEN trashtalk it properly

[jesswhitlock]

Someone: "How are you today?”

The hallucination of Edward Cullen that I keep around at all times: "Lie."

[bellasredchevy]

[cupidofcaravaggio]

the movies truly do not make bilbo enough of a silly little guy. in the books, his natural response to being chased by a giant ass spider is to make a little song about it. truly insane mind

[juneflowerautumn]

Me *leaves a pile of assorted jorts in the woods*: for the werewolves

[katie-huon]

"My second reaction was horror.

Who was she? At first glance, I couldn’t find my face anywhere in the smooth, perfect planes of her features.

And her eyes! Though I’d known to expect them, her eyes still sent a thrill of terror through me.

All the while I studied and reacted, her face was perfectly composed, a carving of a goddess, showing nothing of the turmoil roiling inside me. And then her full lips moved.

“The eyes?” I whispered, unwilling to say my eyes. “How long?""

[threebooksoneplot]

drum roll, please! 🥁✨

And a huge round of applause for the winners of our Eclipse alternate cover contest, creators of our OFFICIAL fake covers for our official fake books Warfare and Peace and Corona Light! A huge thank you to everyone who submitted an entry. We were once again blown away (title of our sex tape) by the impeccable quality of your work.

In the Warfare and Peace category, we award the golden onion of victory to Jasper (@fatvampcat) and their stirring depiction of the Edythe/Beau/Julie love triangle!

And after a tight race in the Corona Light category, we award the golden onion of victory to reigning champ Kristele (@trinketcrow) for her classically twilightcore Cuck Tent cover!

All of this year's entries brought their absolute A-game (keychains and bevvies and pigs, oh my!), so we'll be reblogging the ones submitted via tumblr this week so we can all continue to admire them.

@ winners, please get in touch with [email protected] and let us know if you'd like your prize in the form of a golden onion (in which case, let us know what address to mail it to) or a Lilia Original™ graphic design of your choice.

and of course, since we were impressed with every entry and you're all winners to us, we made everyone a snowflake participation badge!

[threebooksoneplot]

Warfare & Peace and Corona Light chapters 1 are now live! 🍎🧛‍♂️🍏

Read along with your favorite fake books!

Warfare and Peace chapter 1 - Ultimatum

Corona Light chapter 1 - Ultimatum

"After all these months of edging on the precipice of euphoria, unable to feel release, Hades would finally come…home."

cover designs by @ trinketcrow and @ fatvampcat

[edwards-cullencumber]

Designs by me available as T shirts and hoodies on Etsy

Stickers, Wall art, tote bags & more on my Redbubble

Instagram

Please share by reblogging, but don"t repost, thanks!

@volturialice @threebooksoneplot @bisexualemmettcullen @forkswashington @teamjacobthot @panlight @gisellelx @twilightisgaynow @vampiresinforks @bella-swans @edwardssnail @smolvampiregirl @big-idiot-wolf-boys @twihard-diehard @ivymp3 @cockmcstuffins @renegadepack @leahcee @howlonghaveyoubeenseventeen @the-golden-onion@phil-dwyer-stan-account @denalilily @lunastwilightblog @twilitty

Sorry if tagging anyone here is obnoxious, I don't have many followers and would be really grateful if anyone would consider taking a look at this post and reblogging it if it makes you laugh. Thanks xox

[thepngpixie]

Pomegranates

[threebooksoneplot]

calling all terrible (and good) artists and designers: 3B1P is hosting an Eclipse alternate book cover contest!

Design an alternate cover for our fake Eclipse retellings Corona Light (Edward's POV) and/or Warfare and Peace (Beau's POV) and win your very own golden onion! (*Alternate prize if you'd rather not share an address: Lilia [from episodes 10, 21, and 42] designs you the graphic of your choice.)

Submit your alternate covers by posting them to tumblr and tagging @threebooksoneplot OR attach the file in an email to [email protected] (any dimensions, jpeg or png, please)

Include your name/pronouns and a way to contact you if your entry is chosen

Multiple entries ARE allowed (this is a free-for-all, go nuts)

Your entry can be as silly or as "realistic" as you like—last year we chose one of each type!

deadline to submit covers is midnight EST on September 9th, 2024. Happy designing!

(need cover design ideas and inspo? Here's what we've been tossing around) ⬇️

Submit your cover design for Warfare and Peace and/or Corona Light to [email protected] or @threebooksoneplot on Tumblr now through 9/9/24 at midnight EST! Tell us your name, preferred pronouns, and a way to contact you if you win. You may submit as many entries for both/either book as you wish <3 Catch you on 9/11 for our Season 3 premiere!

Three Books One Plot is a Twilight podcast with a twist: we simultaneously read Life and Death and Midnight Sun! This season: we'll once again brave the dangers Stephenie Meyer wouldn't as we continue Life and Death and Midnight Sun into the Eclipse era. More info here.

[trinketcrow]

Hey there Shannon and G, it’s me ya boy back at it again. @threebooksoneplot

(I know I emailed already but I edited some of the photos cause of graphic design issues I noticed after sending and I added a bonus cover)

It's me, your reigning Dark Noon champion back at it again with the phony covers. Just to say I am still your number one fan and I cannot wait for season 3 (please have me as a guest someday! I wrote my masters degree on vampires lmfao I am qualified).

Here's my covers, not as many as last year as the inspiration didn't hit so hard this time, just not an Eclipse girly I am sorry (don't come for me Shannon)

Warfare and Peace number 1 is a nod to the movie tie in cover, but with Edythe, Beau and Julie's fursonas. I couldn't find the Life and Death font! RIP

Warfare and Peace 2 is Beau’s super manly keychain version of Bella’s bracelet.

Corona Light covers are various versions of Edward’s cuck fantasy, need I say more…

[charleslove]

The Vampire Lestat // Interview With The Vampire 1x01, 1x03

[pointnclick]

i want to be a vampire so bad. it would open up a whole new world of procrastination. puts off finishing a novel for 100 years. i don’t do the dishes for 20. oh wait i don’t have dishes because i suck blood. another fucking win

[desinteresse]

When I was “I want him” about a male character im not saying I wanna fuck him. I want him like a spoiled little girl wants a pony, I want to him so I can put him on my shelf for safekeeping, I want him like a good hearty stew on a winter’s evening, I want to put him in a jar and shake it.

[kitkatkey]

Izzy singing a song from the 1940s in the 1700s is peak historical accuracy, no notes