biggest manwhore in the UK: my horse 🐎 told me to tell you 👀 he's sorry 🥺 and he hopes you're not sick 👉👈 here have my sweater 🧎 my princess 🤩 love of my life 😍🥰
People need to start reading mainstream news, if only so I don't have to keep reading "the mainstream media won't tell you" about something that's got like a dedicated live feed on APnews or whatever
From the Nashville Zoo’s fb page! Here’s the petition, please please please take a moment to add your name (even if you’re not from Nashville!). If you are from Tennessee, contact your representatives and make it clear that the people do not want this data center. This is an AZA accredited zoo which is home to several species of critically endangered animals, we NEED to protect it. Make your voice heard!
Something that does disturb me more than the vast majority of things that are depicted in Obsession as a film, are the people I’ve seen adamantly defending Bear and calling him a victim like Nikki.
I’ve seen multiple people at this point, usually responding to someone else’s post emphasizing how insidious Bear’s behavior is, talking about how “actually Bear was set up to fail!”, or “he could never have known the wish would work so it’s not his fault!”, or that “he never intended to hurt Nikki so he’s just as much of a victim as she is!”
And I think these sorts of reactions are really indicative of how we are taught societally to value men’s feelings and image over the safety and wellbeing of women.
There are people who see how Bear behaves initially, and empathize with him so deeply that they either ignore, or apparently just literally choose not to acknowledge the harmful choices that Bear actively makes throughout the film.
They see Bear ignore that Nikki is *very*.**CLEARLY** behaving erratically and NOT acting anything like herself, they see him choose to continue his “relationship” with Nikki after it becomes literally undeniable that she is not in control of herself, that she has lost her autonomy, and they’re able to excuse his behavior because they’re more willing to believe in the initial image they are shown of Bear, than they are to believe in Bear’s capacity to do horrific things.
In a previous post I talked about how Bear is not in love with Nikki, but is obsessed with the image of her he’s created in his head. For some audience members, it seems that they have done the same thing with Bear as a character.
They’ve fallen for the image of Bear they have in their heads after seeing him at the beginning of the film, and believe so strongly in that image that they can just ignore ALL of his wrong-doings and the ways in which he hurts Nikki.
What disturbs me about this is how much of an art-imitates-life/life-imitates-art situation this is.
The biggest most recent example I can think of is the Depp v. Heard trial. That was a clear, real-life example of society valuing the reputation and the public image of a very beloved man over his alleged* mistreatment of a woman (regardless of her being an “imperfect victim”).
There are countless more examples. I think of the People v. Turner case, and how there were people lamenting over the “loss” of a rapist’s “bright future” and how he had “such a promising career in swimming” or whatever the fuck.
Both tragically and horrifically, I could go on.
Fuck, the movie itself also touches on this in-universe with the character of Sarah. Sarah is aware of how Bear is taking advantage of Nikki, but due to her perception of him as a “nice guy” and due to her feelings for him, she’s convinced herself that Bear is the one being victimized by Nikki. The nice image she has of Bear blinds her to the horrific nature of his behavior, and this ultimately costs her her life.
In interviews writer/director Curry Barker has been very explicit about how Bear is the antagonist of the film and his behavior is inexcusable, but there are still people who are trying to interpret Bear as being a “good guy”, who are grasping at whatever straws they can to absolve Bear as a character.
Like. Someone replied to a comment I made on a video about Bear not knowing or loving the real Nikki and they actually said that Bear was trying to break through to the real Nikki with his inaction:
(Never mind that when Bear first called the service line he did NOT want to cancel the wish, only to alter it to make Nikki love him on his terms**)
It’s shocking to me that there are people who see what happens to Nikki, who see how she is treated by Bear throughout the film, who see what his actions lead to for his ENTIRE friend group, and STILL think Bear deserves to be defended in some way.
Anyway, that’s my new “very disturbing and deeply horrific thing Obsession has given me to mull over” this week.
Obsession is definitely going to be a cultural phenomenon for a long time and I think it’s largely because of how intensely disturbing it is on so many different levels. There are layers to this movie that speak very deeply to people’s fears surrounding autonomy, sexual assault and rape, and relationships. It’s about the objectification of women and abusive relationships, it’s about how personal perception distorts reality, how people are willing to ignore red flags if a situation benefits them, it’s about desire, about taking responsibility for your actions, about how the people you trust the most may hurt and betray you. This movie has everything.
Thanks, Curry Barker!
*because of the ruling of the defamation case I am putting “allegedly”. I can’t claim to ever know what Depp and Heard’s relationship was like, but I can’t ignore the fact that there was an indisputable power-imbalance between them in Depp’s favor.
**A point that was made on the very fun “Too Scary Didn’t Watch” podcast episode for Obsession—the hosts mentioned specifically that Bear calling the help line was upsetting to them because even after making his wish for Nikki to love him MORE THAN ANYONE, he’s still not satisfied and wants her to love him on his own terms—granted yes, her behavior was frightening, but it speaks more to how Bear, after literally stripping away Nikki’s autonomy and making her choice for her regarding her feelings towards him, he’s still not satisfied.
Nikki’s behavior is incredibly alarming at the point right before Bear makes the phone call, but instead of showing genuine concern about her mental wellbeing or actually acknowledging her breakdowns, he talks to her like a child and gives her reprimands (“you can’t cook the cat, Nikki!”) and just tries to redirect her behavior instead of get her HELP.