If Music be the food of love play on!

[pr1nceshawn]

[amthsts-remade-deactivated20191]

@babyfairy

[dutchster]

hold on. you want me, a MAN, to buy this body wash which doesn’t have the word “SPORT” in the name and it doesn’t say FOR MEN anywhere? nice try, pal

[groupiesoutrageously]

She had this beautiful red hair, this beautiful skin, these beautiful green eyes, and she was looking up at me, holding, you know, for an autograph. And I said ‘Well, you’re the prettiest little thing I ever saw. So what is your name?’ And she said, ‘Jolene.’ And I said ‘Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene. That is pretty. That sounds like a song. I’m going to write a song about that.’

Dolly Parton on the fan that inspired “Jolene.” (via windwake)

Okay but like can you even imagine? You get an autograph from your fav musician and they write a song about how beautiful you are? This sounds like the plot of a fanfiction written by a 12 year old.

(via lierdumoa)

[foodntwk]

when your blatant sexism causes you to overlook the strongest competitor in the game 

[druidcity-blog]

this episode was so good! i remember at one point chef gwen said something about girls sticking together and chef pink was like “hell no” and got eliminated right after lol

[montypythonandtheholyblog]

today I learned that if you want to slash someone’s tires, don’t slash all four; only slash three because if you slash all four their insurance will pay for it but if you only slash three they have to pay for it all out of pocket 

❤

[dunhamsanddreamscapes]

[sadxfuzz-deactivated20141025]

today on satan makes a blog post

[mytinygayitalianson-deactivated]

Life tip: if someone slashes 3 of your tires, slash the 4th one yourself and blame it on the person who slashed the first 3. Now, your insurance will pay for it.

[clockworkjerk]

Life tip: If you slash 3 of their tires, hide out nearby until they discover their slashed tires. Take pictures of them slashing their fourth tire. Show police when they arrive on scene. Convicted of insurance fraud and still have to pay for tires.

[thelilnan]

i feel like i’m reading a Spy vs Spy comic in text format

[nudne]

i found a club that is exclusively for lesbians. i build it deep in a forest, so that the straights don’t find it. the opening night is a hit. the waiting line is huge. the lesbians are pouring in, the spirits are high, everyones having fun and making friends. suddenly there’s a commotion at the door. “sorry sir, we can’t let you in. this is for lesbians exclusively you see,” says the manager apologetically. “let him in,” i say, “its okay. he’s with us.” by he i mean hozier. he walks in with a guitar case slung over his shoulder and a flower crown on his head. he smiles at me sadly and i feel like he understands. i don’t know what, but he understands. i drink more wine and ignore the tightness in my chest. on the stage, hozier strums his guitar.

[invaderxan]

Women who are beyond done with all of this shit.

(via)

[thehappyhooker-deactivated20190]

When I look at this I feel like it should be something from 100 years ago but this is really going on right now

[devincastro]

[ideal-dish-evolved-deactivated2]

This always makes me well up.

[theworldscrazy]

Too many young people being pressured to have their life together instead of just enjoying it.

[blackness-by-your-side]

[tastefullyoffensive]

“Some guy a few houses down barricaded himself in his house with an assault rifle. Fortunately, they got him (or he gave himself up) without any shots fired or anyone getting hurt.” - SgtScheisskopf

[weavemama]

Imagine hating homeless people so much u find ways to make their lives shittier instead of providing them with the resources they need

[weavemama]

and unfortunately this isn’t the first time people have did things against poor people…

…THIS SHIT NEEDS TO END NOW 

[skeletonphonic-deactivated20191]

“hostile architecture” is one of those things that sounds like it should be awesome from the name

and then you find out what it actually means and are filled with violent nausea

[daggers-drawn]

Destroying Hostile Architecture is an act of human decency

[blackness-by-your-side]

white people think the world belongs to them… however, what goes around, comes around

[clamchowdurr-deactivated2022040]

God is good

[thecherrywinehouse-deactivated2]

🙌🏾

[kenyanxgyal-deactivated20191123]

Look at the animal kingdom doing the lords work

[vibraniumacrylicpowder]

Amen Hallelujah, won’t He do it.

[thepinkcornmoon-deactivated2018]

the circle of life 👌

[iheartmoscato-deactivated202603]

Whatever you do comes back 3 fold

[prettyboyshyflizzy]

Natural selection

[mysharona1987]

*Me as the mysterious Netflix hacker* “I want a million dollars...or else!” “Um...OK.” “And a date with Charlie Cox.” “Um...OK.” “Also, can you renew Hannibal? I really liked that show.”

[beingheda-blog]

And don’t remove himym

[mysharona1987]

I would also like creative control on the next season of The Crown.

[dimestore-postcards-deactivated]

I would like to trash Iron Fist and start all over from scratch.

[mysharona1987]

You have my list of demands.

[all-b1-myself-blog]

Ps: put doctor who back on. (What were you thinking?)

[mysharona1987]

pps Also, Luke Cage should be shirtless more.

[polyamoryprincess]

Then just release it anyways because Netflix got rid of Bob’s Burgers and deserve punishment.

[sesame-street-bandit-deactivate]

Also, could you put Fringe back up? Literally nowhere else has good streams

[mysharona1987]

“Holding Netflix hostage” really does sound like the best thing ever. 

[themoonkitty]

PPPS: Put Bob’s Burgers back on! And give us Rick and Morty…. How dare we not have Rick and Morty…

[dontneedyourheroact]

i know you’ve all heard more than enough about this fyre festival thing but it is honestly Too Much and i am Obsessed With It

like a bunch of grown ass adults are on Great Exuma, which is the largest and most inhabited cay in the Bahaman district of Exuma. that’s where the capitol city of George Town is. it is by no means a deserted island or desolate wasteland. here’s their website in case you want to know more about this popular tourist locale.

these grown ass adults expected a luxury experience and got a regular camping experience. (all following info from this article) they got large tents which they could have easily shared with each other, but instead they fought over them and at least one person set their tent on fire because they hated it. their food was sub par but far from trash – one person complained that for breakfast they only got “Eggo waffles, cinnamon rolls and room temperature coffee.” here’s the George Town map on their website where you can find the variety of restaurants and grocery stores these dummies could have gone to for sustenance.

a lot of people have compared this hilarious shitshow to ‘Lord of the Flies,’ but that book was about a bunch of little boys during the Cold War crashing against their will on an actually deserted island and surviving for days, maybe even weeks without turning on each other. I won’t deny that the fyre festival people were scammed, but at the end of the day they are adults who paid to be on an inhabited island and only took hours to start looting and rioting.

i’ve seen a lot of people saying we shouldn’t make fun of this because these people are in ‘a terrible situation’ and like…. no they aren’t tho. they are in, at worst, an average situation, which they personally worsened with their greed and petulance.

anyway that’s all the info i have for now on why it’s totally okay to make fun of these idiots, have fun

[ithelpstodream]

😂

[waggadelic]

he passed the test

[appleshampooing]

Whoever photoshopped the Dashcon ball pit into this photo from the Fyre Festival did such a good job that Cosmo magazine put it in it’s list of things that went wrong at the Fyre Fest on Snapchat.