My moist scrungo

Welcome to my special hell. Weedzard (Weed Lizard). Cleric of Pepsiman. Localize Mother 3! 🌻. He/Him

[ursquirmingbeeschurger]

Mother 3

New pinned post

[drfelici]

Another lil guy showing some sick moves 🔥

[drfelici]

The f are you

[apeiron69]

God me and some friends are talking abt being dense af rn and i just remembered this one time i was shopping w my dad and i wanted to get rainbow shoelaces at the dr martins shop. And there was this punk girl, dyed hair face piercings rlly cute, behind the counter and like prince charming putting the shoe on cinderellas foot she offered to lace my gay shoelaces into my dr martins and i let her. “Wow what good customer service!”. And then in the car my DAD had to tell me that she was flirting with me a major L to gay people over the world

[apeiron69]

She was on her knees for me and everything and i noticed NOTHING im still so embarrassed good god

[apeiron69]

This world is so cruel

[apeiron69]

Why would you curse me like this 😭😭😭

[willgrahamscock]

pausing mid thrust to open tumblr.com to delete the celibacy gif I reblogged 2 weeks ago

[fuckedndstupid]

[cunt-force-therapy]

Why are they in Hell

[willgrahamscock]

because if you have sex you will die and go to hell

[human-pet-they]

They’re adding soulslike elements to Grindr

[mrsterlingeverything]

I fucked Roy G. Biv

[gaytanic-panic]

[crabussy]

-> listening to a jaunty country style song -> hear the lyrics wrong -> pause. frown. go back a few seconds to relisten -> hears the same fucked up lyrics -> check the actual lyrics to see what it ACTUALLY says

-> oh!

[joshlovesyou]

[salmonballer]

a masterlock? bro you are practically free-use

[phaeton-flier]

NTR doujin starring the Lockpicking Lawyer

[lakevida]

are you guys gonna wrap it up with the dog motif anytime soon

[fraenum]

literally man's best friend but whatever. i guess you do sexual roleplay as some kind of tender-leaved houseplant?

[lakevida]

you know full well that my sexual roleplays are geological in nature

[machinot]

bad news for chocolate lovers: amid massive corporate downsizing, Lindt has had to euthanize 2,000 of its handsome european chocolate chefs . an additional 1,300 will be thrown out in the cold with nothing but their stupid Fucking whisks

[trans-girl-nausicaa]

while they share a similar base flavor, dick tastes more umami while pussy tastes more acidic, though recent menstruation conveys an overwhelming metallic flavor that some diners object to (though i am not one of them). recommended wine pairings are

[trans-girl-nausicaa]

[trans-girl-nausicaa]

(today i learnt that if you don’t know how a post should end, just post it unfinished anyway and someone else will come up with an ending)

[notahorseindisguise]

im not fucking joking i just found a women want me fish fear me hat on the ground

[notahorseindisguise]

it needs a wash bc it was on the ground and i dont trust that but im so excited. best find ive ever found

[megamindsupremacy]

the notes on this post are SENDING me

[ivy-saurs]

randomly remembered this tweet and had to stop myself from bursting out laughing

[junewild]

incredible innovations on the beverage front

[kaijuno]

[yossyislandd]

[manlymothman]