A Glowstick About To Snap

I'm here, I'm queer, and I want to go home.Ao3:UselessLesbian . I’m Shannon, and I'm a sucker for that gay shit-expect inconsistency.She/Her/Lesbian/ 28

[uselesslesbian1]

Because I forgot to put it here, behold: Yennefer of vengabus

Edit: show version here

A Glowstick About To Snap

Yennefer of vengabus- show version- now with more drama Game version here: Because I forgot to put it here, behold: Yennefer of vengabus

[chitsangenthusiast]

what he means: my first girlfriend sacrificed herself for the good of her people, and she didn't think twice about it. i saw firsthand what it meant to truly protect those you love, and in that moment i also experienced what it meant to be loved enough to be protected. but i wasn't ready. i didn't have enough time to say goodbye. she was gone before she fell back to me, and i knew it even before i looked for a pulse that wasn't there. she was heavy, until she wasn't, because i saw death happen in a way i never thought it could when her body vanished from my arms. i now know what it feels like to kiss a spirit, and it's the last touch i have of her. she sacrificed herself because she believed it was her duty, an expectation she felt she needed to face, and it should never have happened. but she got dragged into a war that we brought to her home. there was nothing i could do to protect her from its devastation, and i blame myself for her death.

what he says: my first girlfriend turned into the moon

[cugzarui]

what he means: that is so out there it is literally beyond my feeble comprehension and i have no idea how to respond and yet i can tell by your tone and expression this is something that has impacted you and yea that does sound like the sorta thing that would impact a person and it seems to have been a negative impact and i would like to console you somehow make you feel better and improve the relationship between us but even on a good day and with a normal subject id have no idea how to do that like what you just said sounds like something you should talk to a therapist about or maybe a priest or something but im not gonna say that i dont wana make you feel weird or isolated you shouldnt have gone through that and i would like to say its going to be ok but i dont know if it is or if this is the right moment to say that im sorry that happened to you

what he says: thats rough buddy

[aropride]

apparently u can't add polls to posts from 12 years ago so i'm screenshotting it

what "level" are you

egg

hatchling

baby dragon

dragon

still a dragon

mega dragon

super hella dragon

UNHOLY OFFSPRING OF LIGHTNING AND DEATH

Voting ended onJul 16

[freesiadotcom]

the moon is literally my favourite circle

[freesiadotcom]

OOH THATS A REALLY GOOD PICK!

[freesiadotcom]

YESSSSSS

[freesiadotcom]

amazing. brilliant.

[freesiadotcom]

that is so cute

[freesiadotcom]

unending peace and joy....

[dragon-in-a-fez]

never going to be over that time I was trying to explain polyamory to my mum, and she said "I just don't understand how someone could be in love with two people at once" and I gave her my the-cognitive-dissonance-is-causing-me-physical-pain face and she said "what??" and I very quietly said "mother....you had an affair...."

[storyweavingspider]

So I got outed as polyamorous to my mom by one of my partners when I was 18, and she turned to me and went “oh, whats polyamory?”

And lil me, panicked by Baby’s First Outing and wholly unprepared to answer this, responds with “it’s like what dad does but with consent”

She thought it was funny but I was mortified 😭

[bestiolin]

maarten inghels

[animate-mush]

@sherbertilluminated there's a line somewhere in Ursula Vernon's Digger that goes something like "it is difficult to be metaphysical around the truly geologically minded"

[boycritter]

this sucks so bad i need to [remembers suicide jokes only worsen my mental health] put on the best talent show this towns ever seen

[boycritter]

guys this post is a big hit on the adolescent psych ward

[birdsagainsthumanity]

Fish in the great lake being like

[birdsagainsthumanity]

Wait shit wrong fucking post

[thelibrawrian-deactivated201912]

i was thinking about the weirdest phone calls i got when i still worked at the public library and i remembered this one phone call. it was probably less than 20 seconds long, but it still makes me laugh.

anyways, this woman called and without even saying hello after i said the usual “public library, how can i help you?” spiel, she said, “i have a very important question: when you shelve books, do you push them all to the front of the shelf or all the way back?”

it took me a second to process the question and then i answered that, at the library, we always shelve them so that they are even with the front edge so they’re easier to grab and see. she was obviously delighted by this answer and then, as if an afterthought, she asked, “okay, what about you? what do you do at home with your books?” i said i did the same thing. she hummed in obvious agreement and then just like that she said “thank you!” and hung up.

i never heard from her again. i hope she won whatever argument she was having.

[tehzii]

for about a year, i worked at a call center for sprint. i have a similar kind of story. a woman called, and said she had a question about the call history on her bill. “sure, let me just pull up your account-” and she cut me off going, “no, no, it’s not anything specific, it’s just. so, if you change the time on your phone, does that change the time on the bill?” “uh… no? the time on the phone doesn’t matter, the call history is recorded by the towers.” “ohhhh” she said in the saltiest voice i have ever heard “so even if you changed the timezone it wouldn’t change the time on the bill? to, say, the middle of the night?” i stg yall i looked into the camera like i was on the office. “um… no? it would still be the local time of the tower. is there anything else i can help you with?” to me, overly chipper: “nope! thank you! have a great day!” turning on someone as she hung up: “she says yoU’RE A LYING SACK OF-” i still mean-snicker every time i think about it.

[ladyzolstice]

i used to work in a call center for a roadside assistance company, from late 2015 to early 2016. it was easily the most miserable job i’ve ever had, and the turnover rate was very high. people stuck on the side of the road tend to be quick to anger - understandably so - and it wears on you after awhile.

so i had been having a string of very time-consuming, draining calls. my line rings again, i steel myself for another angry caller, and i pick up. “[redacted] roadside assistance, how can i help you?” i chirp, in my Customer Service Voice.

“yeah, hi,” a gentleman with a thick southern accent responds. “my motorcycle won’t start.”

i brace immediately for another long call. motorcycles were notoriously difficult to work with - a lot of insurance companies wouldn’t insure them, and a lot of tow companies refused to pick them up because they require a specific sort of trailer.

“i’m sorry to hear that, sir. what’s your current location?”

“oh, i’m just at my house. i was wondering if it would be okay for me to just load it into my trailer and take it to my buddy’s shop. would that interfere with my insurance?”

i click through his account and am Relieved to discover he’s in the clear. “No sir, it looks like you’re good to go. Can I help you with anything else?”

A pause. “Have you heard the good news?”

My Anxiety, which had been receding, suddenly spikes into the fucking stratosphere. I live in the rural south. The “good news” usually means “Jesus” and i was in no mood to be proselytized to for god knows how long.

i steel myself for the Religious Talk. “What news, sir?”

“McDonald’s is now serving breakfast all day!”

I laughed so hard I almost cried. I hope that guy ate as many hashbrowns as he could.

[t0bey]

felt like doodling balthus from when he was actually enrolled at the officers academy lol

[rhube]

I just remembered that this was a thing that was HILARIOUS in 2006 and apparently that was ten years ago now.

Old people: join with me in remembering how funny we found this on LiveJournal.

Young people: look at this lolrus, it’s so happy, it has a bucket.

And then they stealed away the bucket and we realised we had fucked up a perfectly good elephant seal and given it anxiety.

[pipistrellus]

listen this vintage meme is high quality and i will hear nothing said against it

[rhube]

20 years. I am not happy about this.

[demonicsymphony]

I’m delighted at the bucket reappearing but dismayed at the passage of time

[luminouspica]

Happy 20 years to Lolrus and his bucket!

[thepromiscuousfinger]

I love very specific cakes

[easily-evi]

I had to redraw this cake 🍰

[sweaterkittensahoy]

A companion:

[redstonedust]

i think people really under sell the physical side effects of mental health disorders sometimes. like sure the depression and anxiety may be 'just in your head' but when what's in your head happens to disrupts your sleep schedule and prevent you from going outside regularly and eating consistent meals and exercising and generally taking care of your body. well it sure takes its toll huh.

[mochlus]

Disney is doing crazy things in the japanese mobile game sphere rn

[mochlus]

you may be familiar with disney twisted wonderland, the gacha game in which various disney villains are used as direct inspiration for handsome anime boys. well that game was so successful that disney is trying to do it again but this time they're just animeboyifying whatever

here's mickey, goofy, donald, and chip & dale. yeah they turned mickey & friends into anime boys. they're an idol unit or something. they're technically not anime boy versions of the source characters, they have different names. mickey's guy is "Neo Michel". not michael, michel, like he's french. chip & dale are "Ruska Moncrief" and "Ranka Monk", they have different last names, they're not brothers anymore so that they can be yaoibait instead, anyways this post isn't actually about these guys I'm just setting the stage for the actual humanizations I wanted to show you

They also did monsters inc. And. Well it's obvious from the designs who mike and sully are. but you will also notice. the blonde one on the left. with glasses. monsters inc is kind of famously about just the two guys so they didn't really have a lot of other non-villain characters to take anime boys inspiration from, I guess, so, well,

Yeah it's her. they made an anime boy version of the mean receptionist slug. her name is roz btw, as all of boygachagame twitter has become extremely aware of in the past 3 days as we speculated prior to the release of the full image who tf the third guy was. the anime boy's name is "noah slugger". at this point no parody of the types of things gacha games will make gijinkas of will ever be able to live up to what disney is officially spending their own real money on designing

[sivavakkiyar]

Perry Bible Fellowship

[headspace-hotel]

I haven't seen this in like a decade

[mimzalot]

[I walk into the room clearly continuing a muttered conversation I was having with myself] because he's mixed, and because he's rich, that's what people keep missing about Claude, he does not fit neatly into a shallow perception of what it means to be oppressed so they make jokes like 'ha ha ha Claude's so obviously not from here and everyone is stupid for not seeing it' but it isn't obvious to the people around him because they never expect an outsider to be in a position of power, and folks fail to acknowledge that part of Claude's identity is that he CAN pass as a Riegan without closer inspection - in a way that, say, Cyril or Nader could never! Claude is more easily able to assimilate due to how he speaks, looks and acts, and that's not a flaw of the game design, it is actually a weirdly nuanced detail of what it means to be 'pass', yes, visually, and also through proximity to wealth, power, class - not because you don't 'look brown' but because you couldn't POSSIBLY be brown, THAT'S a key difference. the game did so many things weird about racism but the idea that Claude 'passes' isn't the unrealistic part, what I find unrealistic is that so few people have assessed the blind spots and grey areas of how racism manifests in society, oh my god what do you mean this isn't something you've all had to experience or think abou- [I exit via the same door I came through]

[rioblitzle]

i go to the shop and I ask if they have any raspberries. they say no, they used to sell raspberries, but they haven't had any in stock in the last 15 years. I ask if there's somewhere else I can go to buy raspberries. They say no, with confidence and pride, they're the only shop around who has ever sold or will ever sell raspberries. Other shops might sell other fruit, sure, but they have a monopoly on all raspberries forever. I ask if they're possibly planning on them selling them again in future? they say they can't tell me that.

on the way home, I encounter someone eating raspberries. I ask and they tell me that they grow their own, they got some seeds from the shop back in The Raspberry Days and kept them. They take me to a field of many beautiful raspberry plants and invite me to pick my own, they're free for all the town to pick whenever they'd like.

someone comes up behind us. It's the shop manager, President of Nintendo Shuntaro Furukawa. he hatefully throws a bob-omb that blows up and kills both of us instantly for stealing 200 trillion dollars worth of potential Raspberry Shop That Doesn't Do Raspberries Anymore profits that they weren't making and then he turns around to the camera with a big thumbs up and says don't do piracy or something ok please

[free-my-mindd]

[kingbedlam]