I’m making an RPG! C:

Hi, I’m Lilac, I’m “basically the same age and gender as the N64,” and what I may lack in common and worldly knowledge is made up for by specialized and otherworldly knowledge, such as basic/moderate pronoun and verb comprehension, or various aspects of game design.

[woahajimes]

been thinking about this for the past half hour.

the comment section is a joke but i got nothing

[woahajimes]

jermont???

[lambchop-soup]

Jyoming is pissing and crying 

[roman-roy-apologist]

noooo not mboy jarkansas

[gumidonut]

wtf not johio⁉️☹️

[lilium--regale]

Jebraska is dying

[incorrectinfinity]

Jalifornia 😭😭😭😭

[asingularcanadian]

she can't be talking about my brother joklahoma

[emptyjunior]

Okay i do have the actual answer she gives but i promise it will only make you more angry, she pronounces Oregan very wrong to rhyme with Jordan

[trash-soup]

Nah, she's clearly talking about Jisconsin

[uwubercharge]

oh yeah, the Soldier from Team Fortress 2. his name’s Jane, rhymes with Maine.

[uwubercharge]

game design prank: implementing both a short-range blink and long-range fast-travel, then labeling each one simply as “teleport” in the controls menu

left trigger + left stick + right stick = Teleport (global repositioning system)

right trigger + X / A / B = Teleport (3/6/9 feet forward)

imagine the schadenfreude of leaving out the parentheses. you now have four different inputs- one and only one of which has two layers of directional input- that all just say “Teleport”

[starpeace]

i love pitting classically trained magic users against self-taught magic users in sci-fi/fantasy but it shouldn’t be snobbish disdain for them it should be terror

[starpeace]

“WHO TAUGHT YOU LIGHTNING BEFORE BASIC TELEKINESIS. LOSING MY MIND WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU JUST DID IT. WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAST WITH YOUR BARE HANDS”

[elidyce]

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT YOU’VE ‘HACKED’ MANA DRAIN

WHAT DO YOU MEAN ‘DRINK SOME JUICE’

WHAT IS ‘LOW BLOOD SUGAR’

WHY IS THIS WORKING

I HATE YOU SO MUCH

[superjustaguyblog]

Okay but other direction can ALSO be a lot of fun

“What do you mean I don’t have to burn half my blood to create a fireball?”

“Why can you teleport more than once without vomiting? WTF is ‘quantum displacement awareness’???”

“You know HOW many spells? HOW? ... What do you mean ‘my spell book’?”

“Ooooh, you’re just summoning water portions from the Plane of Water... Lol I thought I HAD to combine hydrogen and oxygen molecules to generate water in small amounts. That’s so much easier then what I was doing!”

[anachronistic-cat]

Tags via @mia7437

[uwubercharge]

Hi! Programmer here, this is absolutely how programming works! I taught myself RPGMakerMV and i’ve basically replicated the teleporter functionality from Spelunky (roll a variable 5-8, check the player’s facing direction, combine those two things to jump the player the correct distance in the correct direction, check the player’s destination tile index is air rather than a wall, ect)

Anyways my question is this: how do you store a string of text in RPGMMV? Whenever i want to, i have to create a faceless homunculus character that i keep hidden in a basement level away from the player character, and just use the homunculus’ name as the string. If i want to store a second string of text at the same time, that’s a second trapped homunculus. Look, they have favorite colors. I can’t- surely there’s a more humane way to do this??

[fishing-lesbian-princess]

Just saw someone with “use whatever pronouns you use for yourself for me” in bio. I honestly never considered the depth the pronoun metagame could have, we’ve barely scratched the surface with this shit

[despazito]

[uwubercharge]

Spelunky 2 taught me how to play fighting games: “arrow of light rebound > serpent fireball > jetpack ignition > spike” is a combo that deals 22 damage followed by a one-hit KO. That’s frame data!~

[nostalgic-breton-girl]

'boots of resist frost' yeah they're just boots

[volumina-vetustiora]

'shield of blocking'

[uwubercharge]

Legend of Zelda: Hourglass of Time

image description: a heavily cropped and pixelated screenshot of an image search for Captain Linebeck, veritable eponymous protagonist of Hourglass of Time. he is looking over his shoulder at the camera, away from a paper that is such low image quality as to be illegible and/or blank, just like his expression. Link’s ear is visible in the lower left corner

[cannibalchicken]

man made horrors beyond our comprehension

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

We finally have computers dumb enough to pass the Turing test

[uwubercharge]

love that the computer’s though process seems to be “discard the answer the user gave me- it’s probably wrong- then calculate 90% of 500 for myself. now, technically, the user might have given the correct answer, but we can check for that later.”

[were--ralph]

The ultimate sexy poll showdown you can only choose one to fuck

Vampires

Werewolves

Voting ended onSep 28, 2023

RB for the largest sample size this site has ever seen. it's time to put an end to this.

[thatdimensionalfox]

now, considering the fact that a werewolf made this poll, I suspect this poll might be slightly biased with the viewers of this poll

[were--ralph]

no i want people to get it as far away from me as possible so it gets a fair chance all around, so rb and keep it pushing

[uwubercharge]

“Bleuagh!” -tumblr sexyman winner, 2023

[yossyislandd]

htat is dusknoir

[uwubercharge]

yeah, i don’t quite remember what happened in mysterious dungeon, but wasn’t that guy groovyle’s boyfriend, or something?

the way i reckon it, that’s the first panel of a comic whose second panel is groovyle being sprayed with the hose mr. Dusk Noir is holding

i hope my use of the word “reckon” has conveyed that there’s a >25% chance that every word i’ve just typed is nonesense. have a wonderful time of day

[yossyislandd]

what the hell is pokemon mystery dungeon

[uwubercharge]

a sucker punch to the emotions for the ages, for all ages!

if you look closely in the panel on the right left, there actually is a tiny image of groovyle to tide you over, presumably hunched over and peering in awe at the Time Artifact Thing (TAT) as per established in mysterious cutscenes.

very good game, bosses make me cry every time. because they kill me with their teeth and claws. it’s brutal.

[uwubercharge]

there he is c:

[yossyislandd]

htat is dusknoir

[uwubercharge]

yeah, i don’t quite remember what happened in mysterious dungeon, but wasn’t that guy groovyle’s boyfriend, or something?

the way i reckon it, that’s the first panel of a comic whose second panel is groovyle being sprayed with the hose mr. Dusk Noir is holding

i hope my use of the word “reckon” has conveyed that there’s a >25% chance that every word i’ve just typed is nonesense. have a wonderful time of day

[yossyislandd]

what the hell is pokemon mystery dungeon

[uwubercharge]

a sucker punch to the emotions for the ages, for all ages!

if you look closely in the panel on the right left, there actually is a tiny image of groovyle to tide you over, presumably hunched over and peering in awe at the Time Artifact Thing (TAT) as per established in mysterious cutscenes.

very good game, bosses make me cry every time. because they kill me with their teeth and claws. it’s brutal.

[yossyislandd]

htat is dusknoir

[uwubercharge]

yeah, i don’t quite remember what happened in mysterious dungeon, but wasn’t that guy groovyle’s boyfriend, or something?

the way i reckon it, that’s the first panel of a comic whose second panel is groovyle being sprayed with the hose mr. Dusk Noir is holding

i hope my use of the word “reckon” has conveyed that there’s a >25% chance that every word i’ve just typed is nonesense. have a wonderful time of day

[nyancrimew]

the main question i have, @staff, is why the fuck do people with tumblr ad-free still see your paid promotion features for netflix (and presumably other corporations in the future), like at the very least make the tab removable for adblock users. i get that you're desparate for money, but this makes me question why spending 39 USD a year for ad free would be useful at all if the way more intrusive forms of advertising (like the goddamn fucking clown (lots more reason why that one is questionable, but i feel like thats been talked about enough by now)) are still all entirely visible and not removable without an ad-blocker, i can easily see people not renewing their ad-free subscription over shit like this, especially if u keep pulling it.

[uwubercharge]

I’ve learned how to make “Crushers that kill you INSTANTLY” in RPGMMV. this Spelunky fangame fever dream is coming along nicely

[bodyfeeling]

op turned off reblogs but i want this post on my blog

[nights-at-crystarium]

[uwubercharge]

[frawgs]

“cmere boy”

*sound of clanging pots and pans getting closer*

[cybercerealkiller]

[animesickos]

We're on a new platform with a totally different audience...we have to prove ourselves all over again...convince a totally new group of people to think we're funny and worth your attention....so allow me to drop some of my "A" material....the funniest thing I got.......here goes....... jeef berky

[punkrorschach]