Procrastination looks like this. @vandalshorty - Tumblr Blog

having a permanent full time job is you thinking to yourself “so this is really the rest of my life huh” as you come home every single day before using your 4 hours of recreational activity to do nothing and then going to bed

left-reminders

sgt-dignam

and if i refuse?

why worry about something that isn’t going to happen?

schistcity

dnd beyond ad campaign 2 episode 1: matt introduces dnd beyond and all the services it provides at the beginning of the show :)

dnd beyond ad campaign 2 episode 67: After a harrowing political race between Liam and Sam for president of DnD Beyond falls into chaos after it is revealed Sam forged evidence of collusion between Liam’s campaign and a foreign power in an attempt to discredit him, Sam is thrown into a deep creative rut from which there is likely no escape. As a last ditch effort to pull together a complete ad for the week’s episode, Sam plays a backup ad originally intended to be aired in the event of his tragic and sudden death, detailing his last will and testament to his friends, coworkers, and thousands of twitch viewers.

luxlightly

The only reason that Venom 2 doesn’t have a director yet is because everyone in Hollywood knows it needs to be Guillermo del Toro and they’re too afraid to admit it.

anxietyproblem

bixbiboom

Travis: [whimpers] “Oh my god, you guys, we did it! Ten million dollars, you guys are absolutely insane, thank you so, so much for your amazing generosity, your support, your love, your passion… I-I can’t believe it. Uh, this cartoon is going to be absolutely incredible, it’s going to be even more amazing than it was before, uh, and with hitting $10M, I am going to be going to a haunted house! My favorite thing in the world! You should know that I try to go to haunted houses every year to try and build up a tolerance to those things, but I… I reflexively scare easy, okay? I like to buy in. I buy in to the mythos of the particular house that–oh my–”

Dani: [loudly, suddenly] “Hey Travis, congratulations! Oh this is gonna be so fun!”

Travis: “–gods… Anybody else? Anyone else wanna be fuckin’… huh? Yeah? Cute? Okay, so, uh, probably in October, I will go through a haunted house, and it will be caught on film, and you can all laugh as my giant six–” [skeleton rolls in] “–foot… four… self… screams… in terror and panic. This video’s done. Uh, we love you guys, so much, can’t wait to keep you posted and updated on how things develop–” [a wolf howls off-camera] “–what the fuck was that? Is that Henry? I gotta go. Bye.”

vampires-and-witches

bpdgoner

me: wow i actually don’t feel so bad maybe i’m getting better!

me 2 minutes later:

skinnykookies

Why is this so funny

millennial-review-deactivated20

sarahsaharasaurus

this is such a weird way of phrasing “Millenials go hungry because of financial crisis we caused”

snakebitcat

“Why then do they not eat cake?”

arthriticjester

I’ve been scamming the Dominos app promotion where you take a picture of any pizza for free points. For three weeks in row, not only has their shitty camera always interpreted any photo of my cat as pizza, I always tell them it was “the worst I’ve ever had” and “made at home”.

pinksoudafizz

Excuse me @crooked-fingers may i see a picture of your cat plz? This sounds genuinely awesome.

And I just love cats

arthriticjester

Here he is, the Pizza Boy

arthriticjester

And so it continues

arthriticjester

Mmmm, another week, another delicious pizza.

arthriticjester

That’s all, folks. Six cat pictures within six weeks, and for a total of 60 Dominos points, redeemable for a medium 2-topping pizza of my choosing. I will be getting pepperoni and chicken, mine and Charlie’s respective favorites. He will be given many tiny pieces of chicken for being a perfect little model pizza boy, and also for aiding me in tricking a multimillion dollar company into giving me free food. Thanks for giving him the love and attention you all have given this post! He’s gonna try to stay humble.

ninenine-brooklyn

thefingerfuckingfemalefury

RODRIGO NO

woefully-undercaffeinated

So I’m currently enslaved employed by a cable company, and I can offer a few pointers:

Find a copy of the customer agreement online. Read it. Have the “big cats in boxes” YouTube video on standby so that you can renew your will to live periodically while reading it.

Focus on the sections about cancellation

Examine any terms regarding early termination fees, notice required, proration of the time between cancellation and the end of the billing period, and equipment return policies.

Send a letter requesting cancellation to your carrier via certified mail. Include the date you wish for it to be cancelled. If you are not the account holder but have power of attorney, or the account holder has died and you are managing their estate, send copies of the relevant documentation with the letter.

The day after, when it isn’t cancelled, call back. Ask for “retention” or “loyalty” and when asked why, state that you wish to cancel.

They’ll ask you why you want to cancel. Say “I don’t want to discuss it, I just want to cancel my service.” (note: there are times when it pays to disclose your reasons; my company will waive all early termination fees and penalties if the account holder is being entering military deployment or a nursing home. Check their policies.)

They’ll offer something nice. Bundles, discounts, free channels, etc. Say “as nice as that sounds, and as much as I appreciate the offer, I just need to cancel my service.”

When they deflect again, ask how to return any leased equipment. They’ll launch into another spiel about that, thankful that you aren’t making them process the cancellation. Write down the process – they’ll either tell you to bring the equipment to a local office, or they’ll state that they are sending recovery kits. If it’s the latter, ask for the address that the recovery kits return to and write it down (you want to use the recovery kit if you get one, since it’s prepaid, but if they aren’t sent you’ll want to be able to return the equipment yourself.)

After all of this has transpired, state “As I stated in the letter sent via certified mail on [date], I am ending our contractual relationship and terminating this subscription. Has my cancellation order been processed?”

If the cancellation order has not been processed, tell them to process it. Listen to their spiel. Ask for the date that it will be terminated.

Hang up, wait thirty minutes. Call back, ask if your account is pending cancellation or not. If not, ask to be transferred to retention and ask for a supervisor. Demand that your cancellation be processed and advise them that a complaint will be filed with the FCC if it is not.

If more than an hour has been spent on the phone, file a complaint at FCC.gov. Forcing a customer to continue a service outside of the terms stipulated by the contract is illegal and the FCC hates it.